As promised I quickly drop Beck off and return to the Sinclair's, toting coffees and pastries for both Layne and Dil. I find Dil in the kitchen already dressed in an ash colored suit with a light blue shirt. His cafe colored curls are slicked back with gel, making his appearance more severe and less welcoming telling me his aunt played a hand in his outfit. Still, he's very handsome.

"Morning," I hand him a coffee and he smiles, "Morning."

"You ready?" I question and he shrugs. "I'm as ready as one can be at this point. I think I started getting ready way before I knew what I was getting ready for, ya know?"

I nod, the feeling familiar, "Yeah. I know."

He takes a sip of his coffee and we hear the door open, turning to see who it is.

"Oh," It's Aunt Saf, "Isn't it a little early to be having company Dillon?"

Okay but you're here though? I shoot Dil a look and he shakes his head, indicating I not wreck this bitch.

"Aunt Saf, this is KJ Parker, Layne's friend," Dil introduces me, and not for the first time, "KJ this is my aunt's sister, Aunt Saf."

We gotta fight. "Nice to meet you," I rise to shake her hand, which she takes but not before giving my attire, consisting of sweatpants and a baggy T-shirt, a once over.

"Likewise," she forces a smile and not so discreetly wipes her hand on her pants after touching me. I do the same actually producing a pocket sanitizer. She stares at me, clearly unable to take what she dishes.

"Want some?" I smile at her, offering the bottle.

"Kaylie Jane!" Layne appears in the doorway, "I need you. Now please."

I grab our coffees and happily follow her upstairs, where my fate awaits.

"You did not just do that," she glares at me.

I shrug, "What? Bring you coffee? Well of course---"

"Kaylie Jane!"

"What? She started it," I protest, "She called me 'company', Layne. I'm over here more than I'm at my own damn house! If anything, she's company."

"Baby come here," Layne takes the goodies from my hand and places them on her desk before turning and taking my hand, "I'm not saying that Saf was right. She was out of line hands down. But that's just how it is in my family. I'm sure Dil's told you how they treat him. It isn't fair and it's uncomfortable but I'm from a backwoods Missouri family it's a part of who I am. Can you please not fight any of them during the next twenty four hours?"

I groan, "Fine. But I'm not letting them jump all over me either because I'm black. I reserve the rights to sideways looks and snappy comebacks."

"Deal. But only tasteful ones," she agrees, "Now that that's out the way, you can't ride in the limo with us."

"Are you shitting me?"

"Baby I'm sorry there's only one and Saf said that it's for family only."

"Can you ride with me then?" I ask, even though I already know the answer.

"KJ you know I'd love to spend the whole day with you... But it'll look weird."

"Since when do you care about looks?" The words fall out my mouth before I can stop them.

"Babe--" she looks at me, her eyes pleading. You know why...

"Alright," I deflate, "I'm still following y'all in my truck though."

"I expect nothing less," she kisses me, "Fight over?"

"Yeah," I grab my coffee and we sit, enjoying the pastries I'd bought as well. Eventually Dil joins us, seeking refuge from the family members pouring into the home as time nears to be ready.

"You two should get dressed," Dil suggests, "I've gotta make sure none of the Republican rubs off on anything in the house."

Layne gets ready in the bathroom and I force myself into a knee length black dress with a conservative neckline and ballet flats. With Layne's nagging I apply eyeliner and mascara, and even lipstick. I check out my look in the full length mirror in her room, feeling a bit out of element in a dress. Not that I don't look good, it just is a bold diversion from my jeans, tees, and Vans.

"You look good," Layne comes out of the bathroom in a strapless blue dress, "Different, but good."

"Thanks," I stand, feeling a little less awkward with her in front of me, "You too."

She comes over to me and I take both of her hands, which are freezing, "Are you nervous?"

"With you by my side? No," she plays with my fingers, "Are you?"

"Why would I be nervous?" I question and she shrugs, "I dunno. I guess I just figured you'd be triggered by the whole 'motherly figure dying slowing' trope."

"Nah, I good," I promise. "Good," she kisses me, ruining the lipstick I'd just applied.

"Layne! Hurry up!" Saf bursts in, catching us mid lip-lock. We jump apart and Saf glares at me, like it only takes one person to kiss, "Be downstairs in two."

Layne grabs the ash cardigan to go over her shoulders and we head downstairs where she walks me to the door. "You'll be right behind us?"

"Of course," I kiss her goodbye and hop into my truck, only vaguely ready for the day.

I faithfully follow the Sinclair's limo to the church as promised, ignoring the nerves swelling in my belly as we head out of town and to Layne's old house. I vaguely remember the route, and pay close attention to the limo in front of me as it's really the only other car on the road at this time in the morning, once we're out the city. My mind wanders and I hate that some of the thoughts go to Wren, my dream, and how she's slid back into my life since Layne and I got together. I don't like Wren. I swear it.

Only I did agree when Layne said she was starting to like me.

I start to recognize things as we near the town, like the shady ass entrance to the Sinclair's old house. The houses get closer together eventually small stores pop up as a town seemingly materializes. The houses are for the most part small ranch style ones, and it's increasingly clear that many of them are empty, as the whole town seems to be attending Ms. Cassie's funeral.

We turn into the gravel lot of a small church and I put on a smile, ready to play a convincing "just a friend" part to Layne's family. Inside the church, she introduces me to different cousins and aunts and uncles and I smile and pretend I don't notice when someone won't take my hand or discreetly wipes their own after touching me. Except I do bust out the Germ-X on all of them.

One guy shoots me a puzzled look and I smile, "Flu season, ya know." He nods and walks his old ass away, in no position to correct me.

"Gimme that!" Layne takes my hand sanitizer and tosses it in the trash, "You're done meeting people today. Go sit in the corner and think about your life or something."

"As you wish," I bow and head to my car. Does she really think I don't have a back up?

It's beautiful outside and I roll my windows down, a light breeze blowing into my car window. I call Nat, and she answers, telling me that she's at lunch.

"What do you want?"

"Should you tell your girl you're dreaming about other bitches?" I question, "Asking for a friend."

"Bitch you ain't shit," Nat hisses, "What the fuck, KJ?"

"It wasn't even really a dream," I explain, "It was more like a memory."

"Which one?" I tell Nat about the situation, which is in fact the first time I've mentioned it to anybody outside of NCT since it's happened. I also include the the fight between Layne and Wren in storage, which is just as messy.

"Hell nah," Nat says into the phone, "What the hell?"

"I know, it's fucked up," I whine, "I just, it's not something I like to mention."

"Nah bitch.... I know you're girl and you need to take that shit to the grave. It'll break her and probably end with her breaking you," Nat cautions, "And I'd stay the hell out of that storage room if I were you, too."

"Is that Nat?" Layne leans in the passenger window and I jump, even though I'm not doing anything inherently bad.

"Yes," I respond and she blows me a kiss. "Tell her I said hi."

"Layne says hi," I say into the phone.

"Of course she says hi," Nat replies, "What the fuck even are you doing at Northern Cliff? Why does everyone you affiliate with sound bat shit?"

Layne crosses her arms and continue staring at me, which I take to mean she wants my attention, "I gotta go," I end the call and roll my windows back up, upset that with dresses, comes no pockets, meaning I'm stuck holding my keys all day.

"Yes?" I turn to Layne and she grabs my hand. "I missed you."

"Didn't you tell me to go sit in the corner?"

"I was gonna sit with you, of course," she rolls her eyes, "Duh."

****

I don't end up with a seat next to Layne during the service, but do manage to finesse a spot next to her at the grave site.

"Ashes to ashes... Dust to dust..."

The casket thuds at the bottom, the sound echoing, long after anyone can hear it. Dil goes to throw a hand full of dirt into the grave, a light breeze scattering it. Layne goes next, and then me, a weird third child of Cassandra Sinclair. I look Saf in the eye as I do it, daring. Defiant.

I feel a squeeze in my hand and see Layne giving me a look of disapproval. I tear my eyes away and the line continues until everyone who desires has tossed their share of dirt. The minister closes us out with a few remaining words and the crowd dispersing back to their cars to return to the church for the reception. Layne walks me down to my truck, the breeze carrying the scent of spring over our heads.

"Here," she takes one of my braids and ties a red chrysanthemum into it, "It's for love or some shit?"

"Thanks baby. Are you riding back in the limo?" I question.

"I'm so fucking sick of that limo," she says, which is enough of an answer for me to open her door for her to get in.

I get in on my side and start the truck. As soon as we're out the graveyard she visibly relaxes, finally alone with me, "You good?"

"Yeah," she exhales, rubbing her forehead, "Are you good?"

"One hundred percent, good," I grab her hand, "Just making sure you're good."

She rolls her eyes, "Turn here."

I obediently whip the truck into the lot of a small drive thru called GEORGIE'S, cars honking at me in protest, considering I was not in a turn lane.

"Welcome to GEORGIE'S what can I get for you?"

"One moment, please," I glance at the menu board.

"Layne I cut traffic and almost got us killed for fried chicken?"

"It's really good," she smiles and tells me what to order, as well as makes me pay.

"I can assume we aren't heading back to the church?" I mention as Layne directs me to her old house.

"Of course not," she laughs, "Fuck those bitches. Make a left here."

We carry our goods into the house and up to her room, in the same condition as when we were here last, only a week ago. Layne spreads a towel over her bed and layers out the box of chicken wings, mashed potatoes, rolls with honey butter, corn, and green beans. I head downstairs to get us something to drink, finding bottles of sweet tea in the fridge. When I head back upstairs Layne is only in her bra and under wear, which catches me off guard even though it's nothing I've never seen before.

"What the fuck?" Slips from my lips before I can stop it.

"I don't wanna ruin my dress," she shrugs, apparently content with eating a fried chicken dinner more than half naked. I stare at her a little longer, taking in her freckled skin in the daylight. Yes, I've seen her like this before, but not in the light. Not this exposed. I can't look away, but can't look at her either, without my thoughts turning dirty. Has she always been this beautiful?

"Are you gonna join me or keep ogling me?" Layne interrupts my thoughts, "Hello?"

I pull my dress over my head, taking my place across from her on the bed, indulging in the deliciousness of the hot fried flesh we're consuming. My girl somehow manages to make violently ripping apart chicken wings hot.

I eat my own wing while sneaking glances at her body. Sitting so causually exposed is probably the weirdest thing we've ever done together, with me in boy shorts and a sports bra, and her in her underwear, eating chicken. On the day of her mother's funeral.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" she calls me out, catching me for like the third time staring, "You have actual pieces of meat in front of you but you're choosing to look at me like that?"

"I never went to my mom's funeral," I blurt. She stops whatever else she was gonna say and waits for me to elaborate. "I just.... I woke up the morning of, and dipped. I got on the Metro and just sat there all day until eventually I ended up at the reception at our church. I came in in my pj's and a t-shirt. Nobody asked where I was. Nobody questioned me."

"KJ, damn," Layne puts down the chicken bone she mid deep throat and puts all her attention on her, "I never knew that."

A solitary tear slips from my eye, "I just... I don't have a lot of regrets, but that's one. I should've went. But I ran. Like a bitch. I think about it a lot, is all."

"We can go back to the church if you want," she offers.

"No, no, I--- That didn't have anything to do with us right now. I just think about it sometimes you know?"

She nods, "I know. I just, I never regret any moment with you ever. There's nothing at that reception that I need and don't have here. With you."

I smile and she goes back to her own personal fried chicken eating contest. I relax and dive into the box myself. Two girls, half naked, stuffed full.