The intergalactic technology summit was an annual event, or at least it happened once every agreed cycle. Members of the GA excitedly brought forward their best advances in the past year to share with the convention center. This was the first year that the humans had been invited. Of course, at such short notice the humans had only been able to send a few delegates, who were ordered to 'pay attention, take notes, and most of all, see if there is anyone who would be willing to let us test it out.

For that reason, Commander Vir of the UNSC accompanied Earth's representative rocket scientist. At first, the two humans had been a bit wary of each other one being primarily a military man and the other being primarily a rocket scientist. First impressions were a bit deflated as the scientist assumed the big, muscular soldier would be bored, stuffy, and kind of dumb, while the soldier assumed the small, tweed-wearing scientist would be boring, stuffy, and kind of condescending. Of course, upon spending the next ten minutes with each other it turned out that geeks come from all walks of life, and by the time they reached the summit, a friendship was forming.

They stepped through the doors with their badges on and allowed both of their mouths to drop open. It was no secret that humans were not far on the end of the technology spectrum. In fact most of their gear was rudimentary if not laughable to other species like the Vrul or the Runid who used anti gravity systems instead of engines to propel their rockets into the sky. There were entire rows dedicated to the advancement of medical science which made humans look like an automobile chop shop where people go to get sequentially dismembered by rusty saw blades.

The Geek fest that followed would have been laughable for an outsider, but with the two of them it was simply a reason for excitement. They pranced about the convention, the rocket scientist asking dozens of questions in an attempt to understand the technology, while the soldier took every opportunity he could to test the object personally no matter how dangerous it may have been. Generally, together, they made a decent team, and the scientist came to find that the soldier was not, as it originally seemed, and idiot. Any technology involving aviation, despite him being a rocket scientist, was quickly overshadowed by the knowledge of this man, who had operated, fixed and MacGyvered most machines without a comprehensive knowledge of physics.

They were sitting down to lunch as the soldier was explaining, "And that's why the T-8 doesnt work despite being good on paper simply because of human error. Its counter-intuitive and unless trained out of old habits, the pilot is going to crash it."

The scientist frowned, "Well alright, but the T-8 system is the perfect model. It works with the least amount of energy drop-off, and can be cooled faster and more efficiently than other systems. Its use would revolutionize space flight."

"And I get that obviously, its super awesome in theory, but I'm telling you the T-8 is not compatible to the way that pilots think, especially under stressful situations. The brain sort of goes back to its original programming while the T-8 forces you to do internal calculations, which is the reason that they constantly crash. I flew one once for like ten minutes and wanted to smash my head into wall after using it."

"Well.... I suppose-"

"Try to automate the thing, and I bet a computer will fly it just fine, but keep out the human component-"
At that moment, the scientist opened his mouth to speak when a group of aliens walked up from ne of the isles, a vrul, a rundi, a tesraki, and a finnari.

"Good morning humans, we are pleased to see that you were able to arrive today."

The scientist squirmed in his seat nervous and out of sorts, but the soldier simply smiled and launched into his greeting with the ease of a born extrovert, "And it's a pleasure to be here. I have to say that we are beyond impressed at what we have seen today."

Together the aliens hummed in appreciation, "we are pleased to find that there is something we can do that you humans haven't already mastered."

With a wave of his hand the human brushed off the complement returning it, "Please, you give us too much credit. Our science is practically in its infancy in comparison."

They spoke for a few more minutes before the aliens paused looking at them expectantly. The scientists glanced over at the soldier with a confused expression which was unnervingly returned in equal measure.

"Well?" The Vrul wondered.

"Well what?"

"Well, where is your piece of technology. That is what this conference is for after all, to share your inventions with the world."

Together the human's hearts dropped into their stomachs and they glanced at each other with wide panicked eyes, "We were supposed to bring an invention?"

"Of course...." The aliens glanced at each other, "Do you no have one."

"Well I n-"

"Of course we do! Just messing with you, obviously." The scientist turned to look at the soldier with a panicked expression of warning eyebrows raised almost to his hairline.

"Don't tell me you forgot about our invention, Dr. I mean it is one of the most important pieces of technology in human history." He continued to glower in panic, what was this blabbermouth doing. It was like watching a man stand with a shovel in a hole seven feet deep and insist he wasn't digging his own grave.

This was going to be the single most embarrassing moment of his career.

The soldier nudged his ribs, "You know, THAT technology."

He cleared his throat in frustration and nodded, "Oh yes of course..... I'm sorry I just got so..... Excited that I blanked for a moment. Why don't YOU show them. You are so much better at these things than me."

"Er...." The soldier began, "Of course I will. Hold on and let me grab it real quick." He stood up setting his bag on the table and then began rummaging through it.

The scientist put his head in his hands, unless he had an antimatter core shoved in his bag they were fucked.

The human held up a finger as the aliens looked on expectantly, "Hold on just have to find it first....." The scientist felt as if he was about to puke. Then the soldier's eyes lit up, and his face was crossed with a massive grin. "Ah there it is." The scientist looked on in confusion

The aliens leaned forward as the human stood taller hand still shoved in his bag.

"What I am about to show you may well be one of the most important inventions is the history of humanity, Nay! The history of the galaxy, single handedly responsible for human innovation

Beyond the warp core, beyond life support and anti gravity, this is the single most important invention to ever grace the field of human scientific knowledge. Its application is endless as a multipurpose tool and is so adaptable it can be used for ANY, and I mean ANY application."

The aliens sat wide eyed and the scientist leaned forward with bated breath. What could be so grand that the soldier could spin a lie like that and get away with it. He didn't appear to even be breaking a sweat.

"Ladies, gentlemen, and distinguished others, I present to you the..... The multifunctional Universal Unilateral Bonding Strop." With a theatrical flourish worthy of a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat, the soldier withdrew his arm from the bag and raised his hand high into the air, where light from the ceiling caught and reflected off its shiny silver surface....

"Duct-tape." The scientist blurted in consternation. Voice cracking with near laughter and disbelief.

The soldier gave him a warning look and then nodded, "Yes, of course, Dr. More formally known as duct tape."

The aliens gathered closer in curiosity, "It doesn't look like much." One of them pointed out

But the soldier looked at him with an expression of hurt consternation, "I assure you, it's everything I said it is and more, originally invented in 1943 by a Vesta Stoudt, who was trying to find an acceptable replacement for less durable cloth tape. It was originally intended for use in sealing ammunition boxes, but soldiers later determined that this little miracle could fix anything from achinery to boots, to weaponry. I guarantee you wont find a human that doesn't have some."

He stepped forward proffering the material for closer inspection.

"What is it made from." One of the aliens wondered.

The soldier paused then stammered, "Well I.... Um its made of."

"Well it can actually be made of any number of things." The scientists piped up, "It is very versatile that way. The woven fabric base can be made of anything from cotton to nylon to fiberglass, specifically designed for flexibility. The back was originally coated with waterproof polyurethane and then coated with the adhesive. The same process is generally used though there are many different varieties. The more plastic the adhesive backing, the more water tight and so can be used to stop leakes, repair pipes, seal gaps and any number of other applications. They even make a more durable reflective variety that is heat resistant, so can be utilized at high temperatures."

He turned to glance at the soldier who was beaming openly at him, winking his one remaining eye before turning to the aliens.

"You said it can be used in all applications. Explain."

"Well I am glad you asked." The soldier began taking a deep breath, "I've personally seen it used to repair shoes, cars, machinery, pipes, clothing. It has the ability to incapacitate a human ..." He paused there to let that sink in, "It is used to make art, and clothing, hold things together, seal packages. In large concentration it is strong enough to hold a grown man off the ground. I've seen it used to make a boat, and once, an entire airplane, with additional equipment of course. Pretty sure someone made a cannon using it once, but that could just be a myth."

"Point is." Said the scientists, "Humans use this for everything, and though it is an old invention it is one that deserves to be shared across the galaxy."

The Vrul crossed his arms, "That is a big claim to make for such an object."

"Yes." A Tesraki piped in, "You sell well, but business is business. If the product isn't up to scratch than how can we trust it."

"We must have a demonstration."

The human grinned in response, "Well, I am glad you asked." He held the roll of tape up picking at the edge with a fingernail before withdrawing a long strip. The sound it made was a satisfying sccriiiitch and then tear as he pulled a piece off sliding the roll over his hand to hold it on his wrist. He held the two ends between his fingers and flexed the strip between his fingers, "See completely and entirely flexible.

One of the aliens frowned, "I thought you said it was supposed to be durable, but you just tore it in half."

The human frowned, "Well that is one of the great parts of this tape, tear it just right, and anyone can use it, but exposed to pulling or twisting forces it is difficult to break. Let me demonstrate." He grabbed the piece of tape by either end and then began to wrestle with it. Instead of breaking the tape stretched and strained slowly pulling apart until eventually it snapped causing the human to stagger a bit.

"See now imagine multiple strips all working together."

The aliens muttered. The scientist stared on in awe, they were actually coming around. He glanced towards the soldier with a look of disbelief. The bastard had done it, he had actually done it. Sold a 2,000 year old invention as the most important piece of technology in human history.

The soldier was grinning as he tore a few more strips from the tape handing them out, "Here take a pice, try it out for yourself."

The aliens tentatively did as told and what ensued was an amusing spectacle of aliens confusedly trying to unstick the tape from their fingers, accidentally sticking it to themselves, and then begging for help in getting it off. A Vrul danced around in circle shaking his hand but the tape wouldn't let go . This little show had drawn a crowd, and others came forward to curiously sample the strange human invention.

Warp reactors, and medical science was ignored in favor of the humans and their single roll of tape.

When they finally got the hang of using the sticky one sided adhesive the aliens suddenly became obsessed with what they could stick together. Chairs were hung upside down to tables, people's hands were tied together. One of the Vrul was taped to the floor. The front doors to the convention were sealed shut.

Pandemonium ensued as tape was wrapped around anything that seemed even mildly broken.

To everyone's surprise, a vrul who had recently received an injury to his helium sack, sealed the hole with a piece of tape, and was able to return to floating within a matter of seconds.

Somewhere in there the Commander and the rocket scientist lost sight of the role, only to find a rundi taped to the wall looking slightly beleaguered a few minutes later.

They stood together at the center of the convention floor staring around as aliens stuck things to other things, waved their hands about, and generally turned the center into a house of complete chaos.

The rocket scientist leaned in, "What have you done."

Wide eyed the soldier turned to look at him with a grimace, "Er..... I have no idea."

They looked around surveying the carnage made by one role of tape. There was a slight ripping noise and they turned to see the doors finally opening strings of cut tape billowing in the air rushing out onto the street. Drev security walked in accompanied by a Rundi oversee who paused in the doorway in consternation staring at the carnage.

Aliens everywhere, and two well-behaved humans standing in the middle of it.

He rubbed his eyes and rechecked as if he was seeing things. Generally when something like this happens you would expect to find the humans being destructive, not the other, generally mild species.

The soldier shrugged raising his hands in a 'we had nothing to do with this' sort of gesture. The rundi didn't seem convinced.

It took several hours to deal with the aftermath, and it only stopped when a Tesraki returned to the soldier holding the cardboard center of the role looking saddened by it's loss, "Do you have more."

The soldier rubbed the back of his head, "Afraid you used my whole role, but I am sure we could come to an agreement about getting you some." The Tesraki nodded in a subdued sort of way, handed him the used up role and then slunk away. The Rundi overseer glowered at him with an 'i knew it' sort of expression.

Walking out of the convention well into the night after being forced to help clean things up, the scientist looked over at his companion, "That was some serious silver tongue shit back there. How did you do it."

The soldier simply smiled and shrugged, "Sort of just came to me."

"If that hadn't worked, we would have been screwed."

He waved a hand, "Nah, I wasn't worried."

"Speak for yourself. I was close to pissing myself.

Just then the scientists phone began to ring. He was getting a patched in transmission from his superior back on earth and motioned the soldier to stay quiet. He answer the call and put it on speaker, "Yes sir."

"I'm just calling to see how the convention went?"

"Uh..... well it went fine considering the circumstances." The scientist stuttered.

There was a pause over the other end of the line, "What does that mean."

He shuffled his feet nervously not entirely sure how to say this, "Well, as it turns out that being invited to this thing meant we were expected to bring an invention."

He heard shuffling on the other end of the line and some muffled cursing, "Shit, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. How did you handle that mess?"

He scratched the back of his head feeling a smile broke out across his face, "Ur.... well lets just say we should make a note to the UN that, if anyone asks, duct tape is the most important piece of technology ever invented."