My Friends are Human

"Let us go back to the beginning. How long have you been aboard the human ship?"


"Approximately 2 cycles maybe a little more"


....


"You don't remember precisely."


"...Time is very hard to keep aboard a human ship. They have a much different measurement of time than we do."


"Do you often find yourself using human measurements."


"Of course,I have to. The entire crew is human, if I were to use any other system of measurement than I would create more problems than I would solve."


....


"Hmm, very interesting. Tell us Doctor, when did the psychological symptoms appear."
"With all due respect chair member, I don't believe that there are psychological symptoms."


"Really, that is interesting because on your intake evaluation it says that you have acute symptoms of stress, hyperactive affect, logical degradation, increased sensory reactivity, lexical degradation, and that is not taking into account the physical symptoms, which include but are not limited to, predatory gate syndrome, reduced use of inflation, and disjointed visual sequencing.... Can you tell us why that is doctor."


"Things move much faster on a human ship. I don't have time to just float around."


"I see...."


"For some reason I don't think you do."


"That is another interesting thing I have noticed, Dr. That speech pattern you keep using , our tests tell me it detects high levels of aggressive affect."


"Oh really."


"There it is again."...."Look, Dr. the council is very very worried about you, which is actually becoming a disturbing pattern in your history. First you demand to switch careers after being appropriately placed once switched granted, there is a long history of proper behavior, but then you ask to be transferred off planet, which is highly unusual.." ... "The records here state that you have published no less than 120 works of academia in the past three cycles beginning with your original admittance to the surgical profession off-word."


"I wasn't aware that academia was seen as psychological degradation."


"I don't like your tone.... Regardless that is only tertiary to what comes next, where you subsequently quit your job, hopped on a human military ship, and have now been gallivanting across the galaxy.".... "Do you know what the word Harbinger means, Dr.?"


...


...


"A harbinger is something that heralds the arrival of something else. You might call it a warning. I find that to be interesting, don't you, because it seems to me that the ship was aptly named, Since you and the human's appearance is often a harbinger of disaster, confusion, and idiocy.."


"I-"


AH- let me finish. Before the humans arrived on scene, the galaxy was relatively stable, but since they have shown their faces our entire economic system has devolved into chaos, riots and upheavals over inter-species relationships, hybridized human species, prison riots, wars, and the subsequent breakdown of our society beginning..... With you."


....


"May I speak now?"...."The way I see it, you are getting dangerously close to questioning the decisions of the galactic assembly and putting our entire treaty at risk. The humans may have brought chaos with them, but plenty of that was already on the way. War would have been inevitable with the Drev, if humans hadn't stepped in. As far as interspecies relationships and riots go, i believe that has nothing to do with our species and everything to do with the poor decision making of the galactic assembly. No one was being forced into those decisions and the GA decided to take away that choice, which is what really caused the riots."


"Tha-"


"Furthermore, the prison riot was actually caused by Gibb and his delusions of grandeur. If none of this is causing any questions for you, than I might take the time to point out that the Gibb are theorized to be a subset of Vrul.."


...


"As far as economics go, the humans didn't pin down the Tesraki and force them to implement a capitalist system, and as far as i understand, our own economic system on planet is unchanged."


..."that way well be Dr. but that still does not answer our biggest concern, that being the slow breakdown of our society and our entire way of life. Do you understand what you did when you entered that human ship?"


"What?"


"You propped open the door for others to follow your lunacy. According to our records at least 100 Vrul have OPTED to leave planet and join the crew's of other ships, including human ones, and that number is steadily climbing. Our inner city population has fallen by .3%, and our analysts predict an exponential rise in numbers."


"I see no issue with that. If the Vrul leave world, than that gives you license to hatch more and keep others on for longer."


"That's not how this works."


"That seems to be exactly how it will have to work regardless of what you think."


"Our society is slowly crumbling, Dr. not just from population reduction, but from the crumbling of our core values. Humanity is showing to have a strange and.... Honestly alarming effect on our population, you being the WORST of it so far, but maybe not for very long."


"You seem to be implying that humanity makes us less Vrul, while I argue that humanity unlocks more parts of us that we didn't know we had. Honestly, if the Vrul were a completely logical species than why would we even have the CAPACITY for emotion."


"Emotion gets in the way of survival."


"Tell that to the humans. Yes, sure we survive, but the humans thrive. Why wouldn't you want to be part of a species that can find joy in something as simple as bubble wrap."


"What is bubble wrap?"


"It's like the crack cocaine of sensory experiences.... My point being that we have spent thousands of years simply trying not to die, but by doing that we have reduced the lives of our population to nothing more than numbers in a machine. The Vrul population hasn't grown for over three centuries, why because we control the population. Why do we do that? For no damned reason that's why!"


"Dr. if you don't calm down we will be forced to sedate you."


"Sedate me than! I know for certain I have a group of people that would quell the universe to get me back, and since this is only one planet you can kiss your infrastructure goodbye."


"Are you threatening me."


....


"I don't have to."


"And why is that."


"Because.... My friends are human, and you are already scared." 

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