"Ok, ok ok, everyone listen up!... QUIET DOWN PLEASE.... Ok very very good. Now we have been cordially invited to interact with a very special group while they are being quartered here on our planet."

"Don't you mean you pestered begged and threatened?"

"You know what, you, you can shut up."

'Why are we doing this anyway. Humans aren't all that interesting anymore?"

"That is where you are wrong! Universe-wide opinion polls state that, behind the drama with the LFIL, humans at large and the most sought after topic in the galaxy. My other sources tell me that only 5% of the galactic population has ever even seen a human. You should read some of the rumors about them, it is quite stimulating.

"How did you even get this to work?"

"The humans seem to want good PR as much as we want good entertainment. Alright everyone! GET YOUR CAMERAS READY!"
"Do you want us to turn on the translation software?"

"No, of course not, well for everyone accept humans."

"Why."

"Well the public won't exactly get a great thrill from them if they think they are intelligent speaking creatures now will they."

"But they are?"

"Shut up, and get ready."

"Three..... two ..... One."

"HELLO EVERYONE! I am Mendex of the Tesraki, and today on my journey through the universe to meet some of the most dangerous species known to the galaxy, I have taken a stop back on my own planet for a rare opportunity. Now my researchers have come up with a few statistics I would like to share with you before we begin. According to intergalactic poles only five percent of the universal population has ever met, in person, one of these creatures. Number two, since their introduction, these creatures have been the cause for a 15% incline in death rate and a .2% drop in life expectancy for your average dweller of the GA. They can digest metal,, and reports say that they evolved to run their prey to death..... A slow death towards exhaustion."

The camera pans slowly over the face of the Mendex, his light brown fur accented by a scruffy red scarf around his neck. They are walking up a grassy pathway, though the grass comes in shades of purple and blue instead of green.

"Now as I said before, I have been given a rare opportunity to interact with these creatures in their own environment. Now based on the concerns of some of my producers, we will not be allowed to go in alone, but have connected with an Expert who will take us through safety. Now as I understand it, this expert has left society to spend entire swaths of time with these creatures. He claims to have been incorporated into their pack and has enough social standing with them that he will be able to protect us while we interact."

The ground grows steep for a moment as the camera moves up a hill and over the other side.

"Ah, there it is, their hive. Look at it. Now not much is known about how they build such complicated structures, but we do know that they enjoy the use of very hard sharp lines and corners. " They trundle down another hill and towards the ship sat crouched in a field. Overhead clouds pass over the star.

"Oh, and there is our expert, waiting for us at the entrance to the hive.

The camera cuts for a second, and when it comes on the Tesraki and a Vrul are sitting side by side at the base of the hive.

"No more suspense. It is time for me to tell you what we are going to be seeing today..... HUMANS. Yes that's right everyone, I have been given access to a human pack and the expert who has been living with them for the past few cycles now." He turns to the Vrul sitting by his side, "Why don't you tell us a little about yourself and your research, Docotr."

The little creature glances up at the sun and then back towards the cameras, "Well I am Dr. Krill, and I have been working as a surgeon for as long as I can remember."
"As A surgeon, how did you end up here?"

"Well, that is actually an interesting story. I was working at the Thevel-1 Andromeda Trauma center, when a human ship actually called in for an emergency landing. One of the humans had been involved in some sort of freak accident on board, and they required immediate medical attention, so I men them in the trauma bay, and, I will leave the details out, but as it turned out one of the humans had a metal rod logged in his brain, through the orbital socket."

"No, you're kidding me?"

"Not even a little. I had never seen anything like it. Accidents like that result in visits to the morgue, not the hospital, but the human was still alive, so I removed the object and watched his recovery. Now at this point I was so fascinated that I couldn't just let them go. There was so much for me to learn."

"So just like that, you hopped on a human ship, and went gallivanting across the galaxy."

"I know, sounds strange every time I hear about it, hardly something I would do."

"What was that like, first day aboard a human ship, surrounded by predators."

"Terrifying as you might imagine. I was convinced that I was going to get eaten or worse, but of course I never did."

"Now why don't you tell us a little about humans.

"Well, Mendex, the first thing you should know about humans is how social they are. Humans generally require SOME contact with other humans weather it be in large group units or at least one other human that they can interact with. It is such a big deal in fact that isolation can drive a human to madness or worse. They are very perceptive to social situations, and that is what made my first day so terrifying because the humans have many social rules that are expected to be followed that just never crossed my mind."

"And how dangerous would you say a human is?"

"Well that depends entirely on the human and the situation. If a human thinks they are in danger, they will either run or they will fight. Humans have a special hormonal response that, during times of extreme stress, can allow them to life objects up to 500% their own body weight. For most of us a human, even the weakest humans, have the ability to maim, injure or severely mutilate." he held up a hand, "however, I am not saying that to make you wary of humans, they are generally very friendly and curious creatures, and as long as they don't feel threatened they will at least be tolerant of you."

"Why are humans so dangerous?"

"Well that is a funny question, it actually stems from the simple fact that humans aren't actually all that dangers.... At least not on their planet, on the basis of raw power or predatory instincts."

"Fascinating, what do you mean by that?"

"I mean that humans were not originally a predator species, in fact they are actually pretty poor hunters compared to most everything on their planet. In fact prey animals have been known to maul humans if provoked. Humans are probably the LEAST durable species on their planet. They adapted to survive in a world where the prey animals were dangerous and the predators could decimate them with the sweep of a paw."

"Is that why they are a pack-creature."

"Precisely, you see, a single human has a very low likelihood of being dangerous on their own planet, but together they can hunt creatures three four five times their own size if not more. You see comparatively to other animals of their planet, humans are slow, weak, with a poor sense of smell, hearing and even sight, but they had the one thing that sentient life is known for, and that is intelligence. This intelligence allowed they to group together and create a strategy for surviving in a hostile environment. That then led them to the building of weapons and machines to the point that survival was no longer an issue, and hunting even the most dangerous of their previous predators had become laughable."

"That is fascinating, to think that a creature that dangerous could be so weak on their planet..... Have you met any of these other dangerous species?"

"Actually, yes/ Humans are so social and pack oriented that they have the ability to bond with non-sentient animals. They call it domestication, and it requires an animal to be, pack oriented, easy to feed, and have a short gestation period. The humans then take that animal and only allow the breeding of animals with specific desirable traits. In fact, they took a similar pack predator, and used their natural sociability to integrate them into human packs. The humans keep them as pets and began to use them as hunting partners considering their new pack member was faster, stronger, had a better sense of smell and hearing, but was now loyal to its human companions."

"That doesn't sound real."

"Oh but it is. We have one aboard the ship."

"And this creature could rip the humans apart?"

"Oh pretty easily, especially if she had the element of surprise."

"Amazing, so what do we need to know before we get on the ship with you, you know for our safety and security."

The doctor shifts in place. He is making a strange expression that seems unnatural for a Vrul, "Well you have to be aware that the humans have a strict hierarchy. When you get on the ship you are immediately assigned a specific sort of guest place in this hierarchy. The human pack alpha that runs the ship is higher than you as well as the betas below him and their immediate underlings. You can assume that your comfort is more important than the low ranking humans but you MAY NOT order them around since it is not your place and you have not been accepted into the pack. Generally speaking though, a human ship is a relatively safe place as long as you are polite, apologetic, and willing to do what is asked of you. Now the humans are likely to be very curious, try not to show signs of fear, but if you do they aren't going to attack or anything. Depending on the human they may or may not gently mess with you, they may playfully try to dominate or scare you for their own amusement, but don't worry they aren't likely to attack. Do not make any disparaging remarks or insult the humans."

"Are humans very sensitive to verbal attacks?"

"Some are and some aren't. In the case of insulting a human, I have found that it is not generally the human you have insulted that you should be afraid of, but the other humans around the human you have insulted. You see many humans have no issue in making an insult, but will not tolerate one directed at one of their pack members. They are very protective of each other, especially the alpha. It is also a good idea not to insult objects that belong to humans. The human bonding instinct is strong enough that they will bond to objects. So the ship for example, do not offend the ship. I made that mistake on my first day and thought the alpha was going to tear out my throat."

There was a shifting amongst the crew.

"What are the rules on touching."

"That is complicated, it also depends on the human. The general rule is not to go up and touch a human without permission. If a human approaches you first, you may make contact with them. Generally hands and arms are acceptable to touch though I would suggest avoiding any other part of the human anatomy for the sake of their privacy. Humans are very very serious about their personal space and their personal privacy

"Are there any warning signs that we should be aware of, just in case."

The doctor nodded, "Well there are a few things. Humans have a warning call they use to indicate to other humans that something is wrong, it generally indicates pain or immediate danger and is specifically designed to get attention and bring other humans to assist. This involves a high pitched sort of keening, it is very loud and very powerful, and will hurt your ears if you aren't careful. Generally though, I have only ever heard it used on a few occasions. As far as more subtle things to look at. If a human gets into a defensive posture in your direction it isn't a good sign. They will bend at the knees and have their hands up to protect their face. Their chins will be lowered to cover their necks. Another important signal to look at is the face. A frowning human could either be thinking or they could be anger. That is when the mouth sort of dips on either end like this.... Yes.... yes like that. But the important thing to look at is the eyes. The eyes will always give them away."

"What is so important about the eyes."

"Well, human eyes are enormously expressive. I swear by them personally. Humans have this habit of pretending one thing but meaning another, and looking at the eyes can tell you that. Eyebrows slanted down is generally a good indicator. A frown mixed with slanted eyebrows and.... Its hard to explain. If you look into the eyes and feel as if their expression could kill you, you probably want to stop doing whatever you are doing. Also sudden silence isn't entirely a good thing either. Humans love talking to each other, there is always someone speaking, most of the tie, but if you are in an area with many humans and none of them are speaking there is either something wrong, or they have been ordered to behave that way"

"What is a good indicator of a happy human."

"It seems strange, but showing their teeth is a good sign most of the time. A curious human is generally a happy human. They like learning and interacting with their environment, so encourage curiosity and the showing of teeth. Also there is a strange sound they make, sort of a repetitive revving noise that comes from the back of the throat or the chest. That means that the human is amused, and that should also be encouraged."

"Alright.... Do you think we are ready."

"I think so.... Follow me."

The crew gets up and the feed cuts to black.

This episode will continue after the break.