Krill = Alien medic (member of a mostly human crew)

Captain Vir = Human captain of a freelance ship (for hire)

Human Behavior log

Date: 84 75 U Cycle 07/13/4020 Human sun Cycle

Time: 12:20 human time

Contents: recorded as a dictation for scientific purposes

Additional Information: Captain Vir has recently returned from the wedding of his sister back on Mars.

Krill "Captain, May I ask a question?"

*Captain takes a seat in his chair on the bridge* "Shoot."

Krill "Um... what?"

Captain Vir *sighs* "Figure of speech, go on ask your question."

Krill "Human mating rituals."

Captain Vir *long pause* "Sh**, you sure you want to talk about that?"

Krill, "Humans are monogamous?"

Captain Vir *pauses rubs the back of his neck* "Well yes, and no."

Krill "What do you mean yes and no. The answer is either yes or no, that's how other species work."

Captain Vir,"Well, some humans are and other humans aren't."

Krill, "You can't just choose."

Captain Vir, "Yes you can."

Krill, "You can't reject your instincts."

Captain Vir, "You'd think after six months on a human ship you would know that we aren't in the habit of doing what we SHOULD do."

Krill *sighs in exasperation* "Fine, So if you aren't ALL monogamous than what are you?"

Captain Vir taps his foot, "Well A lot of guys are just interested in being with a lot of women."

Krill *nods* "To spread his DNA to multiple partners."

Captain Vir *shakes his head* "Um, no, people who do that actively avoid producing offspring.*

Krill *blinks in confusion* "What... but that's the point."

Captain Vir, "No."

Krill sighs, "Ok, so it's like when one male has many females, and he has them, like a herd to show his dominance?"

Captain Vir *shakes head again* "No, he doesn't own them in any way, but I guess you could say he uses it as a status symbol. What you are talking about is more like polygamy."

Krill ....?

Captain Vir "One man with multiple wives. In that case he IS married to them and the point is to get offspring."

Krill, "Ok, that makes more sense. The female takes care of the offspring, so she is less likely to be promiscuous with her partners and less dominant?"

Captain Vir, "Um well.... No."

Krill, *annoyed* "What do you mean no."

Captain Vir "It used to be like that, but then a couple centuries ago the roles of men and women were sort of rejected, so women are like men now. Some of them have many partners and avoid offspring. In certain areas Nepal, at one time, it was normal for multiple brothers to marry one wife to avoid having to break up family land. In Africa there was once a warrior queen who dressed as a man and made her many male concubines dress as women."

Krill *Paces in annoyance." *So your males and females can act exactly the same, and they don't even pare with each other to mate necessary, but to show dominance over other humans."

Captain Vir "Well, not exactly. Only with likeminded humans. Monogamous humans look down on multi-partner humans while multi-partner humans sometimes make fun of monogamous humans. And no offspring isn't the point. I'd say it often has more to do with companionship, with offspring as being an optional side effect for some while being the focus for others."

Krill *Rubbing his cranium* "Do you humans ever do anything that makes sense?"

Captain Vir shrugs, "Not really. Some humans don't even want to pass their DNA at all, and actively avoid companionship."

Krill "But you just said."

Captain Vir "I know what I said, but you need to stop trying to understand humans in simple terms. We aren't simple. We are confusing, we don't have a breeding season, we aren't always attracted to the best candidate genetically, and we reject our own instincts. We have ignored our animal side for so long that if you dug into my brainstem right now, I couldn't tell you what kind of reactive instincts I could give you."

Krill *throws up hands in exasperation* "Than how do I understand humans."

Captain Vir *leans in close and motions Krill closer* "There is only one think you need to know about humans to understand us."

Krill *waits*

Captain Vir "WE DO WHATEVER THE HELL WE WANT!"