"Nyeh, nyeh!"

"Can I help you?"

Papyrus giggled as he climbed as high as he could to the top of his father's head. He had been out for quite some time, but as Gaster had said, he soon recovered after only a month and a half. Sans had spent that time sleepless, wondering if his brother would ever wake up again. Had he nails he'd of bitten them down to the quick, but instead he had spent his time pacing his lonely room and driving himself mad, wanting to check up on Papyrus, but also not wanting to risk his brother's health. Gaster was actually impressed with his son's unexpected level of self-discipline and had rewarded Sans by allowing him to skip work, but all the child wanted was to hear his brother laugh again.

Now that Papyrus was awake, Sans was ecstatic and excited to do whatever the baby bones wanted to do..regardless of the consequences.

"hold up dad, it'll just be a minute. we need a blank piece of paper real quick."

"Well your brother's not going to find one on top of my head-"

"Baby high as hell! Nyeh heh heh!"

Sans snatched a piece of paper from Gaster's desk. "okay, got one! come on down baby bro," he said, holding out his arms. Papyrus hopped into them, snuggling into his hoodie.

Whoa! Bro's getting really big...that almost knocked me over!

"What is this for, Sans? Are the coloring books Papyrus stole not good enough for you?"

"it's not for me dad, pappy needs it to draw plans," said Sans putting his brother down and checking the back of the paper in his hands. Did Papyrus only need one side?

Gaster narrowed his eyes, immediately suspicious. "What kind of plans?" he asked warily.

Whatever it is, it can't be good.

"he's gonna help paint a building!"

"....What?"

"Yep, I's gonna do the art and Snas gonna help da' baby!"

"we're gonna make it all space-themed and-"

"What building are you speaking of?"

And who on earth was lazy and cheap enough to hire two children for such an important job?

"we don't know yet."

"You don't know?"

"We got to find a good house first, then we paints it...stupid."

"That sounds like vandalism."

"No! Is a fee paint job-"

"It sounds like you two are planning to spray paint a building."

"what's spray paint?"

They are.

"Da' black baby we sawed yeserday gonna teach us the art! They good at spay painting-"

"What black baby?!" asked Gaster, suddenly alarmed. "Sans, you told me you were taking your brother out candy-gathering in Snowdin!"

"yeah, so?"

"So the only reasons you two were allowed to leave the lab that night with my permission in the first place was, one: I didn't want Papyrus anywhere NEAR me while I was healing in the Medical Ward-"

"You looked like a pile of sticks! Nyeh heh heh!"

"And two: Snowdin is a white neighborhood! Where in god's name did you find a black baby?!"

"dude!"

"I knocked on da' door real good and there be a black monster inside! She gots a baby too, but he can't crawl yet-"

"I don't want you anywhere near that baby or their family, do I make myself clear?"

"So we gots to carry him to da' house and draw the plans by ourselves."

"I KNOW you heard me Papyrus!"

"what's your problem with black monsters dad?!" asked Sans incredulously.

Gaster had a habit of refusing to hire black monsters and it was one of the reasons the royal scientist had only a few friends. No matter how many assistants quit or were killed, Gaster would NEVER hire a black person regardless of how little they were willing to work for, and the comedian just couldn't understand it.

That's so stupid! They're just like us aren't they? They're smart and they can do things AND we need the help, so what the hell's his problem?!

"I don't like their culture Sans, plain and simple."

"so?! not all of them act the same dad!"

"Nonsense, I don't care HOW professional they act during their job interview, a Decor is still a Decor-"

"what the hell's a decor?!"

"It's a term used to describe Horror Fonts. Also mind your language-"

"she wasn't even a skeleton though!"

"Black Monsters and Decors share the same culture-"

"you're so full of crap."

Gaster sighed and covered his face with his hands. Sans was getting more and more mouthy as he got older and it was starting to wear on the scientist's nerves.

He's going to be IMPOSSIBLE to deal with when he becomes a teenager isn't he?

"Is baby a Decor...?"

"You will be if you keep spending time with THOSE people, that's why I don't hire them. It's all so you can become a respectable member of society Papyrus."

"you are literally the worst person ever."

"Is baby BLACK?!"

"Regardless, I expect you to follow directions. If I ever DO want to be around a bunch of colors I'll quit my job and work at a crayon factory," said Gaster getting up from his chair.

"Nyeh heh ha ha!"

"bro no! don't laugh at that!"

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go finish my work somewhere quiet-"

"YOU ARE THE WORST PERSON EVER!"

"Yeah Daddy! Don't hate me cause' you ain't me!" giggled the baby bones.

"I don't. I hate you for other reasons."

Gaster left the room.

"*sigh*"

Welp, at least I know where Papyrus gets it from.

"Don't worry big Buther, Imma get rid of him when I gets big, then you can be happy forever!"

"heh heh heh," Sans picked his brother up and planted a kiss on his forehead. "thanks little bro, you're real sweet-"

"YOU HEARS DAT DADDY?! BABY GONNA POP A CAP IN YO' ASS!"

There was no response from down the hall.

"Psh yeah you better run Daddy, disaspecting the baby like dat. Dada be cray-cray huh big Buther?"

"stop that."

"Stop what? What chu talkin' bout' Snas?"

Oh no...

"you know what i'm talking about."

"No I doesn't-"

"yes you do! you're not black so stop acting like you THINK black people act!"

What am I going to do?

"I don't know what you's talkin' bout'. I's just being myselves!"

I can't tell him not to stereotype, but I can't have him running around acting like...THAT..either!

"oh hey, would ya' look at that? it's almost.." Sans looked at the office clock. "three in the afternoon. bedtime kiddo!"

"What?! Nooooooo!"

"yep, ya' gotta go to bed baby bro."

"But wh-oh. Oh I gets it, okay Snas, I goes to bed like a good baby."

"uh, good! good boy pappy!"

What the hell is he talking about?

Trying to shake off the foreboding feeling from his shoulders, Sans picked up his brother and carried him to their room, changing him into his orange feet pajamas. Placing him in his crib, he kissed his forehead and turned off the light, as Papyrus quickly went to sleep.

What is this? Papyrus was so excited about painting today...is he really sleeping?

Upon closer inspection, Sans could see that he was not. Papyrus was only pretending to sleep, his tiny fingers moving slightly as he counted the time between breaths.

He's pretending...

Exiting the room, the older skeleton waited by the door for awhile in an attempt to hear his brother climb out of his crib, but after ten minutes had passed, he gave up. Every once in awhile he would make an excuse to check up on Papyrus while he was supposed to be working with Gaster, but apparently Papyrus really DIDN'T have any intention of escaping.

"You won't catch him child. If Papyrus wants you to believe he's sleeping, he'll do everything in his power to convince you that he is. Assuming of course, that he isn't playing a role at the moment, in that case he's doing his best to do what he thinks he should."

"h-how did you know-"

"Because it's six in the afternoon and it's quiet. Regardless of what's going on, be very careful of what you say Sans."

The next morning Sans quickly went to check up on Papyrus, apparently he was still pretending to sleep.

He's been like this all night?! Why?!

Whatever, I know what'll wake him up.

"happy present day little bro, time to wake up!"

"Nye...Nyeh...?" Papyrus opened his eyes slowly as if he were groggy from sleep, then, much to Sans' surprise, he turned over and closed his eyes again.

"huh? what are you doing? it's present day pappy! come see what santa brought you!"

"...There no such thing as Santa, go back to sweep Snas."

"wh-what? it's two in the afternoon! i got up early for you, so you have to come see your presents!" said Sans picking up his brother.

"AH!" Sans cried out and dropped his brother back down onto his crib mattress.

"Baby don't gots to do nothin...cept' sweep! Black babies be nocturnal big Buther, so you gots to wake baby up at nighttime!"

It was wrong to wake up sleeping babies anyway, everyone knew that!

Ohhhh...I see. He's still doing that goddamn "black" thing.

He slept all night because he didn't sleep all day yesterday.

"you're not black papyrus, i told you that already."

"Nighttime's when the black monsters come out to steal stuffs and eats da' barbie-Q-"

"papyrus."

"We blends in wit the dark so nobody catch us and we scoops up yo' stuffs like da' racoons-"

"PAPYRUS."

"Dat's why Daddy call them 'Coons' big Buther! We special nighttime animals so we GOTS to sweep during the day-"

"...."

"...."

"...."

"...But baby might get up for some milk..."

"*sigh* alright-"

"Chalk-wit milk."

"NO."

"I NEEDS IT FOR NUTRIENTS!"

"NO YOU DON'T!"

"I NEEDS IT OR I'LL NEVER GETS BIG!"

"DAD!"

"Why you and Daddy gotta be payer-haters anyway Snas? We gots rights too ya' know? We gots rights and we gots feelings!"

How can I get him to stop?!

"Our people's suffered big Buther! You just racist cause' you jelly-ous!"

Our..people...?

Wait.

"You doesn't know da' struggle Snas, is real sad..."

"yeah? well you don't know how to act like a papyrus font," said Sans slyly.

"Nyeh?" Papyrus looked at him seemingly confused.

"papyrus fonts are supposed to act like someone or something else all the time, but you're just being yourself. i think that two month nap of yours turned you into a lazy bones bro!"

"NO!"

"yeah! you're not practicing your font anymore cause' you're lazy now-"

"YOU CAN KISS MAH TINY HINEY STINK BUTHER!" shrieked Papyrus. How dare he?! It was because of Sans that the baby wanted to get big in the first place! He was giving up his cute so his crap brother could have his crap shinies, and THIS is how baby was repaid?!

"I WORKS HARDER THEN ANYBODY IN DA' WHOLE WIDE WORLD AND I DOES IT FOR YOU!!"

"then why are you still in bed baby bro, hm? how come i'm up first?"

"SCUW YOU SNAS!!" The tiny infant threw his his blanket at his brother's face, but unfortunately he was standing on it, so it didn't go very far.

"HEY DAD, LOOK AT THIS LAZY BABY IN HERE! HE'S TRYING TO GO BACK TO SLEEP!"

"NO I'S NOT! HE LYING!!"

Papyrus climbed out of his crib and ran to go get his presents in Snowdin, not bothering to even put on his snow boots.

"heh heh heh heh!"

"Excellent work Sans, I didn't think I'd have to intervene," said Gaster, leaning against the door frame.

Sans gave him a thumbs up.

It was good to be a genius.