"uh..hey grills-"

"Gives us da' candy or we kills yo' family!"

"papyrus no! i'm sorry, it's his first spooky day. that's not what we say on spooky day pappy."

"What does baby say then?"

"umm..i don't know actually," said Sans slightly embarrassed, it was his first spooky day too. Normally Gaster had him spend it studying, working, or reading in the lab, but tonight his dad was in the medical ward for...reasons.

"hey grillby, what do you say when someone opens the door?"

"......."

"He not gonna talk big Buther."

Grillby put candy into Papyrus's bucket and closed the door.

Huh. Weird.

"Look Snas! Baby got Monster Candy!"

"yep, you sure did. just don't say what you said before when HE opened the door."

"It rhyme dough..."

Reaching the next house, Papyrus knocked on the door with both his fists excitedly.

KNOCK KNOCK KN-KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

"papyrus stop."

The door opened.

"Gives us da' sweets or I eats yo' feets!"

"*sigh*"

Still wrong baby bro...

"Oh what an adorable little baby!" exclaimed a female monster. She looked like a medium-sized black mass of darkness and had one eye in the center of her head. Sans recognized her from the MTT Resort where he and Papyrus would go sometimes to listen to Snowdrake's father perform his comedic routines. "Sorry I don't have any candy for you, my son and I were just about to go candy-gathering ourselves!"

"Look big Buther! Is a black monster!" cried Papyrus pointing at the mother.

"behave yourself."

"What chu talkin' bout' Snas? Baby ALWAYS good..."

"yeah okay-"

"WAZ GOOD MAH HOMIE?"

"papyrus!"

oh god...

"I wants to have a black friend big Buther, they cool-"

"papyrus you're being racist!" whispered Sans harshly.

"Nuh-uh! Racists hate da' black peoples! Baby loves them good! Where yo' son at? I wish to pay wit da' black baby..."

"i'm so sorry about this-"

"Oh it's alright, your brother is obviously very young-"

"BLACK BABY? WHERE YOU AT DAWG? COME PAY WIT DA' BABY!"

"Ha ha ha ha! He's so cute!"

"ye-yeah..."

Papyrus peeked his head inside the house curiously.

"bro, no...!"

"How come yo' house don't have leopard print? There no crosses in here either...where the spots and weligious stuff at?"

Sans covered his face with his hands as the mother began to crack up all over again.

I shouldn't have taken him out.

"If you don't gots no candy, can the baby have some watermelon?"

I should have left him at home.

"I'm sorry sweetie, we don't have any of that right now-"

"Kool-wade then? I can takes da' packets home and makes it myselves..."

I shouldn't have gotten out of bed PERIOD.

"Nope, no Kool-Aid here! Ha ha ha ha!"

"please stop papyrus-"

"Why you no have black people stuff?! I wants some culture in mah wife!"

I can't do this.

"c'mere lil' bro."

"Nyeh? NOOOOOO!"

Sans took Papyrus home.

"NYEHHHHHHH!!" The baby bones immediately began to waile loudly as soon as he and his brother reappeared in the Nursery. It wasn't fair, he didn't even do anything wrong! "NYEH-HEHHHHHH!!"

"ugh, c'mon pap-"

"YOU'S MEAN TO DA' BAY-BEEEEE!"

"no i wasn't! you were being embarrassing!"

"I WAS GOO-HOOOD!"

Poor baby Papyrus, it was his first Spooky Day and all he got was a single piece of candy. It jiggled around his candy-carrier as he waved his arms wildly, making a lonely hollow sound that actually DID make Sans a little sad.

I never got to go candy-gathering on Spooky Day and this might be Papyrus's only chance to celebrate it himself...maybe I AM being mean. The lady wasn't offended right...? What are the chances we'd run into another ethnic in Snowdin anyway?

I should give him another chance.

"pappy, if you stay out of other people's houses...and keep from talking about their culture, i'll take you back out to get some more candy."

"*Sniff* I's just being fwiendly..." said Papyrus wiping the tears from his eyes.

"you think you're being friendly bro, but you're actually being racist."

"But baby loves da' black people's! I saids it!"

"you're stereotyping papyrus and that's bad."

"What sterile-typing mean?"

"it means assuming you know how people act and expecting them to act the way you expect before you actually get to know them."

Papyrus's face went blank.

"*sigh* it means-"

TH-THUMP!

"BRO!!" Sans rushed over to his brother as the baby bones collapsed on the floor of the nursery. "DAD! DAD!!" He continued to scream for his father as he raced for the Medical Ward, not wanting to risk teleporting to a random area of the Lab. Looking down, he could see his brother's eyes bleeding from their sockets through they were closed and his tiny body jerked every once in awhile as if he had been electrocuted.

WHAT HAPPENED?! WHAT DID I DO?!

"DAAAAD!!"

HE WAS FINE JUST A FEW SECONDS AGO!!

Reaching the Medical Ward he ran to his sleeping father's side and shook him awake.

"AH! What?! What is the mean-"

"PAPPY COLLAPSED DAD! HIS EYES ARE BLEE-"

Before Sans could shout another word, Gaster took Papyrus from him and ran to the nearest table, flicking on a light.

Ah, I see...oh dear...

"Sans, I need you to hand me a wet wash cloth, the temperature is unimportant."

The hysterical child obeyed, coming back with a warm washcloth and handing it to the scientist as quickly as he could. "is he gonna be okay?! what happened dad?! why is he bleeding and moving like that?!"

"Calm yourself child! Babies can sense emotion and the last thing he needs is more mental stress!"

"*sob* i'm sorry, i'm so so sorry, i didn't mean to...!"

"CALM DOWN."

"*sniff*"

Cleaning Papyrus's eyelids he flicked off the light and headed to the stasis chamber. "We're going to leave him in here for awhile, in the meantime I don't want you talking to him or entering this room."

"i'm sorry dad..."

"You've not done anything wrong truth be told, this is probably MY fault if my hypothesis is correct. Judging by what I've seen, you tried to teach him something that went directly against his font-"

"so it WAS my fault."

"Wrong. I failed to warn you about this because I assumed for SOME reason that it wouldn't become an issue. Hopefully when he awakes he won't have any permanent brain damage..."

"BRAIN DAMAGE?!"

"If you cannot keep quiet I'm going to have to send you to your room."

"s-sorry..again."

"In order to make sure he recovers, we need to cut off as many of his senses as possible, or at the very least dull them. That means no light, no sound, and no physical stimuli of any kind. This stasis chamber should keep him afloat so he feels nothing..."

"...when will he wake up?"

"That depends on the strength of his mind. There is a very good chance he will be just fine in a month or two due to his abnormally large intelligence; the brain is a muscle you see, the stronger it is, the more it can handle. Most babies would die from this amount of shock and stress, but your brother is a Verbal Font and they are, in fact, highly intelligent."

There's also the fact that he has-

"yeah you told me, that's why he can talk really well even though he's two. what i wanna know is what i did to cause this."

I sincerely hope Papyrus is smart enough not to try and fake amnesia or something...though because of his uniqueness, his font may have very well changed. The mind is a mysterious thing, I can't just assume he'll be fine. I must remember to keep a watchful eye on him and take note of any cerebral changes while he's asleep.

"hello?"

This MAY be an ample, maybe even the ONLY chance I have to record any changes that have already been made during growth. I swear this child is INCAPABLE of holding still, and the fact that he's learned how to turn off the chamber on his own makes it even harder to record his progress non-verbally.

"dad."

I do hope you've enough sense not to have tampered with this machine Papyrus, your very life may depend on it. Did I check the machine for any damages or changes since he informed me of his little achievement?

I honestly can't remember.

"DAD."

"Uh, um what? What is it Sans?"

"i asked what i did to cause this and you just-"

"Ah yes, here you are, study this carefully," said Gaster taking out his old FontSearch. It was worn with age and the information was even older, but it gave a LOT of information as to what to avoid when raising a skeleton child.

Baby Bones

Baby Bones are infant Fonts and need more mental care than physical. At birth they are HIGHLY attuned to emotion AND as to what's going on around them, more so than both Humans and Monsters, so it is important that they are raised as carefully as possible. Even the tiniest of things can affect a Baby Bones and these things will mold their personality for the better or worse. The changes happen at age two and are so extreme that a page on the FontSearch has been made to ensure that you don't make any mistakes that could lead them to becoming a difficult..or even deadly, person to live with. This page is located in the Raising tab, however if a mistake is made and you wind up with a Font you can't live with, a page devoted to changing or destroying a Font can be found in the Requirements tab. Keep in mind that destroying a Font without proper authority is illegal with self-defense as the only exception, in which case a court will decide the best course of action. The page you are currently on will tell you what to avoid when raising a Baby Bones whether created through conception or created through Death.

Sans furrowed his brow at the screen, perplexed.

"Some human babies die at an extremely young age and end up turning into skeletons," said Gaster noticing his son's confusion.

Or at least they USED to.

"humans turn into skeletons?! i thought they killed skeletons though!"

"They do...Humans don't care about you unless you're human. It doesn't matter if you were once a friend or family member of theirs."

"...that's messed up."

"Indeed."Creation through Conception and Death

"You can skip that one Sans, that isn't the way Papyrus was made."

"i'm curious though..."

"They aren't created through death anymore so it isn't important-"

Though most Human babies are born from the union of a male and female, Human babies that die at birth and/or before age two can eventually turn into Baby Bones when enough magic is absorbed through their skeletal structure.

This child doesn't listen...

Unlike Baby Bones created through conception these infants can, unbeknownst to the parents, take on fonts due to presently unknown circumstances connected to the way they died. The effects won't be seen until age two, so there is plenty of time for them to change if proper care is given, however they will need far more attention than if they had been created through conception; other than that there is really no difference between the methods.

WARNING!

Highly intelligent and unusually mature, a Baby Bones can be a bit off-putting for Human and Monster parents looking to adopt, they have unique behavior patterns that may create or trigger Pedophobia (fear of children) and you are legally required to take a psychological exam once before adoption and at least once a month after until age seven, failure to do so will result in the infant/child being removed from your care.

"pedophobia huh? heh, i'm guessing everyone in the lab has that by now, am i right?"

"You would be if there were anyone LEFT."

A Baby Bone's Language Development

Unlike Human, Monster, and even animal infants, a Baby Bones is born with the natural instinct to learn and grow IMMEDIATELY after creation. Upon gaining sentience, the Baby Bones will be silent and highly attentive to the environment and the people around them until language is learned. It is common for the infants once language is learned, to escape their crib and search for books and other sources of information regarding the world around them as soon as they can. As a parent it is your responsibility to make sure the information gathered is factual and beneficial to their mental health. Restricting their freedom is NOT recommended and can lead to EXTREME behavioral problems. Television is also NOT recommended, especially cartoons as they often depict the world as an unrealistic place. A Baby Bones that watches a cartoon with talking animals will often expect the animals in their world to speak to them, when they are ignored a Grudge may be born and they can last up to adulthood.
At age one and six months, the Baby Bones will usually begin to speak and refer to themselves as "The Baby" due to their lack of font, though keep in mind that all babies develop at different rates. This is a very important time for the infant as they will develop a personality during this stage of life and depending on how they are raised their intellect will also be affected. Attempting to name them before age two will result in anger and if continued, a possible Grudge. Be sure not to refer to a Baby Bones as a child, kid, or toddler as that is also insulting and will fuel their hot tempers.

"ohhh! THAT'S why pappy always does that..."

"No, he does that for a different reason...it's in the paragraph you're SUPPOSED to be reading."

A Baby Bone's Social Development

"THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT ONE SANS."

Because skeleton babies lack the magic and skill to protect themselves, they tend to stick near a taller person or perform cliche' acts that they know promote a positive response. Though their ectoplasm will most likely be strong enough to support their legs by age one, they will often opt to crawl wherever they go because it's "cuter" and they are even thought to keep their speech skewed though they've already mastered language. Be sure not to let these cute acts fool you, your Baby Bones, believe it or not, is mature enough to hold reasonable arguments as soon as language is mastered and intelligent enough to manipulate you if you let them. They're born with this level of maturity and temper tantrums are thankfully non-existent because of this, however due to their age and height, many older Humans and Monsters can find them offensive. Please remember that although Baby Bones are intellectually mature, emotionally they are not, Patience is needed, especially at and after age two.

When grouped together, Baby Bones will usually chat rather than play, trading information (sometimes literally with candy or other items they consider valuable though this is frowned upon). Infants that do not work hard to "grow big" (grow up) often find themselves the center of attention by other babies in the group and will more likely than not, be lectured relentlessly by their peers regardless of age. They see the lack of work as unhealthy and lazy, coaxing the "bad" Baby Bones to "be a better baby." The lectures can last hours and the group will spend the rest of their time together afterwards trying to persuade the infant to do beneficial things by practicing their font in front of them (if age two or beyond), walking, or showing off other talents while the rest of the group cheers them on.

"aww, that's cute. isn't that cute dad?"

"...."

"oh hey! here's a chapter that should benefit you!"

Grudges

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned and a woman's scorn grants no terror like the freedom of an angry child." ~M. Hamilton

The term Baby Bones, no matter the century of the earth, will always be synonymous with the word "grudge." Skeletal infants are infamous for their tempers and their ability to hold intense grudges for years on end, causing more deaths than car crashes every year in many countries. They know from a young age that they are exempt from the law and some will use that to the fullest extent if angered making them feared by the ones who'd love them and hated by the ones who'd do them harm. They WILL NOT tolerate any amount of disrespect quietly and their natural instinct to work hard in order to "grow big" has led many to run away from home and find others to take care of them when neglected for too long. Those that earn a Baby Bone's hate are referred to as "baby-haters" and it is very difficult to earn back an infant's trust once it's broken, so it is advised that when in a troubling situation, you sit the baby down and talk to them in a quiet, calm tone. Explain what they did wrong and avoid phrases such as "because I said so" in order to make sure they continue seeing you as a rational person; more often than not they will agree with you because you're bigger and know more about the world. If you DO earn the title of "baby-hater" the best thing you can do is apologize and hope for the best, refrain from telling them what THEY did wrong and focus on your OWN wrongdoings regardless of whether or not you were actually wrong. This is for your own safety as well as others for it is not uncommon for a Baby Bones to team up with other babies and seek revenge. Baby Gangs are quite common in certain areas of the world and they are very dangerous.

Keep an eye on your Baby Bones at all times.

"Sans this is taking too long and I'd like to get back to healing myself-"

"okay okay, where's the part i need to read...?"

Sighing, Gaster took the FontSearch from Sans and found the right paragraph before handing it back to him.

....After your Baby Bones turns two they will get their font and begin to grow out of speaking in the third person. In order to be more productive, they will choose to walk rather than crawl and become obsessed with practicing their font. This is to be encouraged regardless of whether or not the font is desirable as it enhances their self-confidence and level of initiative. DO NOT TRY TO CHANGE YOUR BABY'S FONT!! Any successful attempt to change your Baby Bones font can lead to permanent brain damage and/or death. They're not physically ready to handle the changes that would be made to their bodies until age seven and attempting to change a Font's font without proper authority WILL result in a fine of up to 20,000 dollars and/or jail time.

"Do you see Sans? Papyrus is The Lying Font and he needs information in order to lie well. He gets that information from books-"

"and racist parents."

"....And he believes in certain stereotypes. Telling him stereotyping is wrong makes him unable to play pretend and thus unable to use or practice his font...something a baby bones instinctively needs and wants to do."

That IS what Sans did isn't it?

It wasn't the Wingdings he had a problem with..was it?

"so telling him stereotyping is bad..is bad."

"Correct."

"oookay...so basically papyrus isn't gonna make too many friends when he gets older. welp, let's hope he's satisfied with just me then."

Sans went back to his room, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

"You're all he needs," said Gaster turning off the light. "Isn't that right Papyrus?"

"......."