She was the closest thing I had in my family
I used to be really close to my dad but he is in Afghanistan fighting in the war

He is amazing but my mum never does really compare to him
God I miss him
I could just imagine him frowing at the thought of eric staying in my bed
And I could imagine him checking every 5 mins to make sure eric wasn't making any passes at me

Him and my mum argue a lot they do really love each other
But when I'm older I want a different marriage
I want a marriage where we love each other so damn much that it's hard to keep our hands off each other, to know that no matter what whatever was going on I could come home to that man
And a family it would be a small family but we would have one
And the kids would never doubt the fact that their mum and dad were soulmates

I snap out of my thoughts as I reach the door of my mums room
I slowly open the door and she looks up at me
I walk over and climb in with her
She turns round and wraps her arms around me tight holding me close

" mum he says he loves me like really loves me and oh mum I love him too god he is perfect and he loves me " I say

She nods her head smiling
It was funny how I didn't even say his name and she knew who I was talking about

" oh tami that boy has been in love with you for years " she says
I chuckle

" why did you let him stay over then"

" because you know sometimes you can be so naive tami " she says

I smile
" that's what he says "

" exactly you know I sat next to him in that hospital room
And he just oh god he was a mess
He kept on saying it was his fault and all because he was annoyed that you didn't love him back
And God he kissed your forehead so naturally and it was killing him not to kiss you you could see it

I felt so sorry for the poor boy " she says

I smile
" he kisses my forehead when I'm asleep and he whispers how lucky he is to have me and he thinks I'm asleep but I hear it all " I say

I cuddle into her more
" he whispered once that he wants to have a future with me. And that he wants kids with me and he said how beautiful the kids would be and how good a mum I would be
He wants a future " I say
Mum nods

" he does want future with you tami he always has
You know I like that boy he's good " she says

" he is good and he's a good kisser a really good kisser " I say
I look up at her shocked expression she nudges my arm

" you kissed "

" yeah he was gonna say a big speech but then I think the kiss did everything he was gonna say but don't worry I still made him say the speech to me after "

" like a proper kiss "

" yes mum like a proper kiss , like a casually moving his hands down to my ass , and like a lot of tongue kiss " I say

Her eyes widen
" tami Hayes " she says shocked I laughed

" what he's a good kisser and you just said he was a good boy "

" he is a good boy but tongues already" she says her expression was still stuck in the shocked state

I laughed
" it's not like I haven't kissed a boy before remember I dated mo I didn't go past making out though eric thinks I did though " I say

" he always hated that boy , he used to come to the door for you and you were always away with that boy

I think eric hung out here with you once in those 6 months and that's strange because he comes round every day " she says I nod

She was right God I regret doing that to him

" I know i still guilty about that one" I say
She nods her head and strokes my hair
" I know darling " she says

" can I stay in here tonight mum " I ask yawning

" yeah sure we need to go to sleep now though especially cause you have school tomorrow " she says

I nod and curl up against her and she pulls the covers over us

And I fall asleep in the protection of my mothers arms