Harry
The sound of her voice makes me freeze, my heart skipping a beat. The voice belonging to the girl I knew won't give up so easily, despite my attempt to stop her from getting in here. Typical Elena, always a fighter. But I'm about to show her it's time for her to give up because there's nothing left to fight for.
I slowly stand up, grabbing my shirt from the floor in the process and putting it on, ignoring my bleeding scraped knuckles, actually welcoming the pain. It's nothing compared to what I feel inside. I turn around and face her, hazel eyes filled with uncertainty and fear, but still holding that fiery glint they always have, something I've always liked about her.
"Have you heard what happened yet?" I say calmly, seeing her shoulders drop for a moment, her silence being my answer. "There were exactly sixty children, we've managed to save thirty-eight, four died, and the rest was taken by them. Eighteen children are in the hands of those monsters." My voice is cold and completely detached.
She winces at my tone, glancing away and taking a deep breath. I don't give her a chance to say anything, though, deciding to continue since I'm not done. "You know what's the best part? If I hadn't left with you to play your game, I could've prevented it. I could've gone with them, I could've saved them all perhaps. But I'll never know what could've happened since I was too busy dealing with your betrayal, talking to my missing parents, and getting acquainted with your uncle who is miraculously not dead."
My heart practically rips to shreds in my chest just talking about everything I had to go through today, especially her betrayal. What makes this whole thing worse is that even now that I know what she has done, even now that I feel the pain with every beat of my heart against my rib cage, even now I still love her.
Admitting it to myself right now brings a harsh wave of pain, the knife pierced through my heart twisting. "What? You have nothing to say to your defence? No more lies or false stories? Remember when you came here and we saw each other for the first time? You said something back then, and it has stuck with me ever since. You said you needed me. And when I. . . got attached to you, it gave me hope. It gave me hope because I needed you too. It was a little selfish feeling I had, something to reassure me you won't leave if you feel the same as I do. How wrong and pathetic I've been, I can see it now." I shake my head in disgust, a scoff ejecting through my gritted teeth. "None of it mattered to you."
My words seem to hit a nerve because her eyes snap at me and she takes a few cautious steps toward me, her fingers pulling at the necklace I haven't noticed she has until now, a familiar silver ring with the red gemstone glistening and dangling around the chain. "I wouldn't have kept this if none of it mattered to me. I would've thrown it somewhere and forgotten about it the moment you gave it to me, Harry. But I kept it because it means so much to me, it gave me hope. It was a reminder of what we have. It was a reminder we're real, just like the one hanging around your neck is."
I glance down at the ring she gave to me before we slept together, feeling my chest constrict, a painful lump forming in my throat, almost making it hard to breathe. I don't want this reminder yet I can't find it in me to rip it off my neck and throw it at her face, just like she did with my trust when she had led me to her uncle and my mother. When I glance back at her, I almost cave in. Almost. "You have a gift, you know? Even now you almost convinced me. You almost convinced me you actually cared about me."
"I don't just care about you, it's much stronger than that and you know it." She takes another step forward, our distance being at arm's length, determination radiating off her yet her voice is small, her eyes large with concern for my reaction.
Her words cause a crack in the mask I've put on, but I refuse to give in, I refuse to give her my trust once again. Whether what she says is true or not, it doesn't change anything, it can't. Every cell in my body is dangerously aware of her proximity, the idiotic part of me wanting to just pull her to me and tell her it's okay, it's all forgiven. However, the other, much stronger one is pushing me to show her the damage she has caused.
"Don't," I spit harshly. "Don't lie to me anymore."
"I'm not-"
"You're not what?" I finally snap, my pent up anger getting the best of me. "Tell me why? What do you get with all this? Because here you are, trying to convince me you're the saint instead of gloating for managing to trick me."
"Why? Because of Alex. I told you once, Harry, everything I do, I do for my brother. I told you how absolutely unfair our life in Vortex had been, I told you how he deserves better. There was only one way to ensure he gets the life he's always wanted, and it was to leave. Not just leave Vortex, but leave the country. Unfortunately, there are no planes and functioning airports when the country's at war, so the only option left for us is to use the military planes used to deliver the supplies."
"Only Vortex and Wildfire have the ones flying more than once a month. Vortex was out of the question and since our uncle faked his death and found help in Wildfire, we thought he could help us get away. He agreed under one condition: talking David into making an alliance with Wildfire. He knew we had the advantage considering he was great friends with our father and he would surely offer us help. The task proved to be rather difficult, not because David refused my offers, but because you weren't a part of the plan. We were supposed to leave today and let you go alone to Wildfire, but I wasn't able to keep my promise to Alex or my father."
I clench my jaw, looking away for a few moments. I try to picture myself in her spot, realising I would've done the same for my brother. It doesn't justify what she did to me, though. "Honestly, how fucking dare you? I don't care about your little manipulation game at this point, it's the fact you betrayed my trust that bothers me the most. You knew how hard it is for me to trust people, hell you even knew the reason why! Fuck, you could have played your cards right without making me fall for you and things would be different now. You've made me fall for you when you knew you were going to leave!"
Her eyes widen in shock, her lower lip trembling slightly as if she's battling her emotions. "Wait you- you've-"
"Don't say it. Don't you dare," I threaten. "That's not what I feel, not anymore. You've singlehandedly ruined it, Elena. Now, you can leave in peace, there's nothing tying you to Hazard anymore."
"You were never a good liar." A flicker of emotion washes over her face, emotion I can only describe as pain. "And don't say nothing ties me to this place, you do, all the people I met here tie me. My duty ties me. I will fix this, Harry, just give me a chance. They're at Vortex and I know for a fact they're okay for now, but it won't be long until they sort them and force them to start training to become soldiers. I know how to help."
I can't help but release a cold, humourless laugh, shaking my head. "Do you honestly think I would let you help us after what you've done?"
"Yes, you would. For those children, you would, for Tommy and Alice you would. For your army, you would." There's the same girl I saw on the day I met her, standing tall and confident in her words, not allowing herself to be intimidated by me. But she's not asking for David this time, she's asking for my approval.
"Stop with this dramatic playing the hero in the time of need thing because I'm not buying it." I walk past her, moving toward the door, wanting to get away.
"Harry," she calls out, but I ignore her, hearing her heavy sigh behind me. When a knife flies next to my head and impales itself into the door, I freeze on the spot, my eyes closing for a few brief moments as the memory of a very similar moment replies in my mind, my heart clenching painfully.
Stupid heart.
I turn around abruptly and tighten my fists, taking a few steps toward her in anger as my eyes stare right into hers. I stop myself a few steps away from her, feeling a slight tension sizzling in the air between us, feeling as if something is drawing me to her.
I know she has feelings for me, I can see it. But they're not as deep as I'd like them to be because you don't betray a person you love, you don't stomp on their trust like she did.
Elena makes a bold move by stepping even closer to me, almost fully closing the distance between us, but lucky for me and my sanity, she doesn't touch me. "Trust me, Harry. This last time I'm asking you to trust me."
It's like she has me under some kind of spell, her features being my only focus as my breathing rate picks up. I'm vulnerable for a moment, my hand twitching in a desire to touch her. "If you had told me the truth before all this, I would've- things would be different."
"You know that's not true, Harry," she says sadly. "You would've either thrown us out or locked us away. At first, I just wanted to get this over with, but with time it turned from an escape mission to a mission of saving you. What used to matter suddenly didn't matter anymore, you were my new mission. Alex had a hard time digesting it, that's why we've been fighting recently. Everything we hav- we had was real for me." Her fingers wrap around the ring hanging on her necklace.
I gulp heavily, having a hard time to keep the eye contact with her, something inside those eyes breaking me piece by piece. I can't let that happen, no matter how much it hurts. "You want me to give you my trust once again? You've lost it, Elena. I want you gone. You and your brother need to leave immediately or I'll have to use force." Just the mere thought sickens me, but she needs to get away because she's messing with me and I have enough self-respect left not to let her gain control over me once again.
She takes a step back, looking as if I've just slapped her. "Alright," her soft voice breaks slightly, but she manages to block her emotions. "I'll leave, but this is not a goodbye, Harry. Please just don't do anything stupid and think before you act. I'll fix this." She finally turns around and I watch as she takes her knife and leaves the room without turning back.
. . . .
I don't know how long I stay in my training room before finally deciding to quit wallowing in self-pity and actually do something. Attacking Vortex is definitely not an option since I know it basically equals to suicide, but I can't sit around and do nothing, I have to try and get those children back to us. If David was here right now, I'm sure he would back me up.
I've gathered my most loyal soldiers, deciding to give them a choice if they want to help me or stay here because my idea is dangerous and they have the right to choose whether to expose themselves or not. Louis, Niall, Liam, Tori, Jess, and Ethan all stare at me expectantly, waiting for my explanation for this sudden meeting. A brief shot of sadness courses through me when I realise two faces I'm used to seeing on these meetings are now absent. Elena and Alex have left the base recently, taking away any trace of their stay here. It's like they were never here.
"The reason I've asked you to come here is to offer you a choice. I want some of you to join me on my trip to Vortex." Everyone widens their eyes momentarily. "I know it might seem reckless, but honestly what choice do I have? We could attack them and lose, and ruin our chances in this war. Or I could go and surrender myself to Seth and ask him to make a trade. I need to find a way to free those children, I know that fuckface did that on purpose. He wants something, he wants to provoke me. If we attack, he could easily hurt them or worse before any of us can even approach the gates."
"What about Wildfire?" Ethan suggests. "Since your mo- I mean, their leader offered you their help, why not use it right now? It's better than putting yourself in danger and going there alone."
A frown makes its way to my face, hands forming fists on the table. "I don't think it would be as simple as you suggest. I don't trust them, Ethan, besides, another battle where hundreds of people would die is something I want to avoid. I would also put the children in danger since they would be in the middle of it all. There are too many risks and as the leader, I can't let that happen."
"Wow, you make a perfect martyr, actually," Jess comments flatly. "You do realise if you go there, there's a chance you won't come back?"
"I'm the leader, this is what I'm supposed to do."
"It's reckless, stupid, and basically a suicide mission," Niall says with a blank face. "I'm in." He grins mischievously.
"Why am I not surprised blonde psycho shortcake would volunteer," I mumble.
"I've lived twenty-two nice, fulfilled years of my life, I've had many ups and downs, many, many, many girls have kept me company when I needed it. . . yeah, I think I won't be sorry to die," Liam says. "I'm in too. Of course, I'll change my mind later and beg you to let me jump out when we're on our way but just ignore my pleads, no matter how annoying I get. Oh, and try not to punch me in the face, it's very valuable to me."
"Was that speech really necessary?" Louis asks flatly.
"Duh, every hero needs to give a speech before saving the world and shit." Liam leans back in his seat, a satisfied grin on his face.
"And you choose to talk about your sex addiction," Tori comments.
"It's a lifestyle, not an addiction mind you." Liam scoffs.
"You need a catchphrase, you know? Every hero has one," Niall points out.
"Oooh, I know a few good ones." Liam grins devilishly and stands up, clearing his throat. "Don't be a loner, cover your boner. Put the cloak before you poke. Don't be a prick, protect your-"
I sigh loudly and pinch the bridge of my nose. "Why me."
"Okay I'm leaving," everyone but Liam says in unison, standing up.
"Sit down, we're not done yet," I order angrily, watching as they all sit back. "Not all of you will come with me. I need someone to go to Wildfire and get David back here and someone to take care of the base while I'm gone. There's six of you, so I need two people for each mission."
"How about Jess and I stay here?" Tori offers. "Only men have been leading the base so far, I think it's time for girls to get a try at it."
"While they spread their girl power around here, Ethan and I will take care of David," Louis says.
"Tori, even though I'm going alone, I want everyone to be ready for an attack, I want vehicles along the entire eastern border so if something goes wrong, they can attack. But let that happen only if it's really necessary, is that clear?" I stand up, ready to wrap up the meeting.
Instead of answering, Tori stands up and walks toward me, pulling me in a quick hug and surprising me. "Don't worry, just don't get yourself killed." She steps back and smiles.
Everyone soon follows her example, giving me hugs and congratulating me for being strong and being a good leader. I'm not even sure they realise how much those words mean to someone who has little to no confidence in what he does, especially after still dealing with the consequences of his past mistakes.
I feel absolutely no enthusiasm, I don't even feel anger. It feels like there's a hollow inside my chest that only keeps getting bigger, expanding and crushing me on the inside.
"Mate, you're not okay," Niall states instead of asking me if I'm okay. I feel his hand on my shoulder until he circles around me, his arms locking around my waist, pulling me in yet another hug.
"No, I'm not," I mutter, my arms hanging limply on the sides. "I'm hurt. That's the simplest way to describe how I feel."
"We'll get them back, you'll see," he says reassuringly as he pulls back. "You have us to back you up, always."
My eyes snap up and he gives me a smile. "You and I have been there once already and survived, we can do it again. Man, let them try something and I'll decorate them with bullets like a Christmas tree."
"You have a very vivid imagination." I manage a small smile.
"And you have amazing friends." He points at himself and gives me the thumbs up. "I know the risk of going there and I know they'll probably imprison us, but it wouldn't be fun otherwise, would it? Also, I know you're in pain because of that whole Wildfire ordeal, but you need to focus on what's important at the moment, we'll deal with that later."
"Now let's go, Styles, time to get shit done."
. . . .
a/n: loooots of drama ahead :)))