Chapter 16

I was crying all the time, and even more so as I watched my grandfather's coffin being buried six feet underground. Papa arranged the funeral again and made sure that he was buried next to his only love, Amelia. Mama was buried next to them, too. It was so tragic, watching the three Villafuerte tombs that breathing seems like a hard thing to do for me.

To say I was miserable for weeks was an understatement. I started to experience chest pains and headaches because of too much crying that I ignored all the time. Barin was so heartbroken by his owner's death that he dug the space where Lolo was buried when he was released to the cemetery.

Takot ang mga taong lumapit sa kaniya. I managed to calm him down and I could tell that he was really upset by the way he whimpers, as if calling to Lolo to come back and pet him. Papa watched us silently and apologized for what had happened, even though there's nothing he can do in the first place.

Nanatili kami ng tatlong linggo sa Negros Occidental bago namin napag-desisyunan na bumalik na sa La Union. At first, I was hesitant. I wanted to stay here, than be with Valerie and her children but I know I have no one to stay with. My father is the only family left and I couldn't run away from him. Not when I'm this sad and miserable.

And Barin. I have to take full responsibility of him from now on. The papers were arranged again by my father, and he got a permit to transfer Barin from Negros to La Union. He would be safely caged to travel and be assisted in his new home, our old mansion that houses bad memories now.

Nililinisan ko ang mga sugat ni Barin kapag wala akong ginagawa at hindi umiiyak. My father tried talking to me many times, but I refused to speak a word after my grandfather's death. It was so devastating losing all three of them at once that I don't know how to function properly again.

Kaya sa buong biyahe patungo sa La Union ay halos hindi kami nag-iimikan ni Papa. I could see the silent pleading in his eyes every time he talks to me in his low, quiet voice. He's always offering something, asking if I'm okay, and then making sure I was comfortable. He also talked his way into making me eat since I lost weight because of depression triggered by my loved one's death.

I haven't packed much for our trip back to La Union. I assumed all of my clothes are still in my room and could wear them when I get back. A month after the fire, we were allowed to get inside and retrieve what could be saved from the fire damage.

I almost cried in joy when I saw Lola Amelia's favorite crystal vase and Mama's satin robe. I carried it with me and promised myself that I would treasure the last two things I have in memory of them.

As for Lolo Ferdie, I always had Barin.

"Gusto mong kumain muna, Anna?" Papa asked me gently when we arrived at the airport, waiting for the driver to pick us up. Marahan akong umiling. I am so agitated to see Barin again. He'd be home by now and I wished the travel hadn't terrified him. They injected some sleeping pills so he would get distracted from the constant motion but I'm not sure it would work. Barin hates to be in the cage all the time. Nasanay na siyang pinapakawalan siya ni Lolo Ferdie sa mansion. Now I'm not sure how he will adjust to his new home, and new family members.

Malungkot ang tanaw ko sa coastal road na dinadaanan namin habang bumabyahe kami patungo sa mansion. The white railings by the cliff had been repainted, I noticed some new stores, the high school I went to as a young teenager had been added a new building to accommodate more students and other than that, everything else stayed the same in this small town.

Nang makarating kami sa mansion ay malakas ang tibok ng puso ko. It has been a while since I was here, and I could see that the gates were changed. It's much higher and the metal bars are thicker. I saw some new faces in our mansion and the old housekeepers who still remembered me beamed and cried in joy when they saw me.

Kaagad kong hinanap si Manang Joji nang makapasok ako sa mansion. I saw her in the kitchen, looking tired and still preparing a meal. She also cried in joy when she saw me, hugged me, and said she was sorry for the loss of my mother.

"Para ko na ding anak si Anastasia..." mangiyak-ngiyak niyang wika. "Gusto ko talagang pumunta sa libing niya kaso hindi ako makaalis dito..."

I assured her that it's okay and if we ever have a free time, we would visit my mother and her parents in Negros Occidental. Manang Joji wiped her tears and patted my head.

"Ang laki-laki mo na... Alam kong babalik ka dito, Anna. Matagal ko nang gustong umalis sa mansion na ito. Hindi na ito tulad ng dati. Pero hinihintay ko na bumalik ka..."

That made me cry even more. Manang Joji is like a second mother to me. Her warm hugs and hearty meals are always so comforting. Masaya ako na nandito pa rin siya sa mansion.

Baste suddenly entered my mind. Hindi ko naitatanong kay Papa kung nandito pa ba siya, o ang ama niyang si Mang Dante. I haven't gone to the hacienda, and haven't seen him welcome me in the mansion, either.

Thoughts of my first childhood friend suddenly vanished into thin air when I heard the clicking of sharp heels from the grand staircase. When I turned, I saw Valerie looking like a duchess, wearing a creamy silk dress and sparkling heels. She was holding a wine glass as she descended downstairs, and greeted my father with a kiss on the cheeks.

"How was your travel? Are you tired?" she asked in a sweet voice that made me sick. Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa ni Manang Joji. I shook my head and ignored the two of them, even though I could hear their faint voices talking in the grand parlor.

"Kumusta po kayo?" tanong ko kay Manang Joji. It looked like she lost some weight too, and wasn't as cheerful as I remembered her to be. Her eyes used to be bright and full of life. Now, all I could see is dread and disgust every time she stares at my stepmother.

"Ayos lang ako, Anna. Kaya ko pa naman."

Nangunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya. "Ano pong ibig niyong sabihin?" I bit my lower lip. I don't want to intrude nor accuse my stepmother but I have a feeling she's done something awful to Manang Joji that she hates her this much. She's a very cheerful woman and doesn't get offended easily. "May ginawa po ba si Valerie?"

Humigit ng malalim na hininga si Manang Joji. I could hear the anger at the tip of her voice as she narrated how Valerie tried to fire her many times. She declared she didn't like how she cooks, how she stares at her, and even how she looks. Pinoprotektahan nalang siya ni Papa at pinapagalitan si Valerie sa tuwing may ginagawa siya kay Manang Joji. My father is close to our cook, too. Valerie can't just fire her away.

"Walang-wala si Valerie sa Mama mo, Anna. Mula nang dumating siya sa mansion na ito, nagbago na ang lahat..."

My heart sank inside of my chest as I continued to listen to her. Manang Joji prepared a sandwich for me while she continued to cook, and demanded me to eat it. Doon lang ako nagkaganang kumain. I was eating sandwich in the counter when I heard heavy footsteps darting towards the kitchen and a few seconds later, a heavily-sweated Steve showed up wearing his basketball running shorts and shirt.

Mukhang nagulat pa ito nang makita ako. Nangunot ang noo niya habang nakatitig sa akin.

"Sino ka? Bagong katulong?"

I almost choked on my sandwich by what he had said. Manang Joji stared at him, horrified.

"I'm not a housekeeper." I said silently.

"Eh anong ginagawa mo dito?"

Annoyed of how arrogant he acts, and how he doesn't even remember me after two years of being away, I put down my sandwich and looked him straight in the eyes.

"I'm the owner of this house, Steve."

He stared at me for a few seconds before he burst out laughing. Nakakainsulto ang tawa niya at gusto ko nalang siyang paalisin sa kusina.

"Anong pinagsasabi mo? Kami ang—"

"I am Savannah De la Rua." I said, cutting him off. "I'm the real daughter of Simone De la Rua," I even added, even though I'm no longer proud of being a cheater's daughter. I just want to make it clear to him that he is talking to the real owner of the house. "Eh ikaw? Sariet ka diba? Anong ginagawa mo sa mansion na ito?"

His face was pale as he stared at me with his mouth wide open. Before he could counter, Valerie and my father appeared by the kitchen's door, too.

"Steve!" Valerie beamed and stared at her son adoringly, as if he's the most handsome young man in the world. "Nandito ka na pala. Why don't you say hi to your step-sister? Naalala mo pa ba? Si Savannah?"

"Ah, ikaw pala yun." He tried to sound nonchalant and shrugged, before going to the fridge. Binuksan niya iyon at kumuha ng isang bottled water.

For a moment, we were all silent until Valerie chuckled softly.

"I think the dinner's ready. Why don't we go to the dining hall, Simone?" she asked again in a soft voice that lured my father some two years ago. I think he's still under her spell until now, based on how he looked at Valerie with tired but adoring eyes.

"Ipapatawag ko po si Cynthia, Manang, at nang matulungan ka dito sa kusina." Ani Papa. The only thing that made me glad today is the fact that my father still has the same respect to our cook after all these years. Some things have remained the same in this mansion after all those tragic events.

"Sige po, Sir..." ani Manang Joji, na hindi man lang nag-abalang tapunan ng tingin si Valerie at nagpatuloy sa pagluluto.

Valerie seemed to be annoyed by my lack of interest of her and Manang Joji who is blatantly ignoring her presence, too. Dragging my father away from the kitchen, she stomped towards the dining hall with her heels clicking after her. Steve didn't stay long in the kitchen, too, as I watched him with glaring eyes. Kulang nalang ay sabihin kong umalis siya sa kusinang ito dahil wala siyang karapatang langhapin ang parehong hangin na hinihinga ko.

"Ang mga anak ni Valerie..." Manang Joji shook her head in dismay. "Mga walang modo. Nagmana sa ina."

Napabuntong-hininga nalang ako. I stayed in the kitchen to talk to her some more until my father called me when Barin finally arrived in cage. I was so excited that I leapt from the kitchen counter and run towards the front door where the cage is being pulled out from the big truck.

I could tell the travel didn't went well with him. Barin is still sleepy and a bit moody. He doesn't respond very well to my calls and would shrink himself as small as possible at the corner of the cage. I suspected that the delivery team had injected another dose of sleeping pills again, thinking that he'd gone wild after being in the cage for almost 15 hours.

"Oh my God!" Valerie shrieked upon seeing me open up the cage and letting Barin out. "What is that thing doing here? Simone!"

Papa turned to her calmly, while I patted Barin's head and assured him that it's going to be okay. He's still sedated and doesn't want to deal with a lot of people right now, let alone strangers.

"Barin is Ferdinand Villafuerte's black puma. And now, he belongs to Anna."

"This is not a zoo, Simone!"

"I know. This is my house." I replied quietly, but with fierce determination as I stood up and faced Valerie. "And this is my pet. I don't see the problem here. Mayroon ba?"

Valerie stared at me with open anger. Sinulyapan niya nang pagalit si Papa, na para bang nanghihingi ng tulong.

"She's right, Valerie." Papa said after a while. "I don't see any problems with Barin staying here."

Disappointed and mad that my father didn't tolerate her, Valerie stomped upstairs while murmuring angrily to herself. Nagkatinginan ulit kaming dalawa ni Papa.

"Masasanay din siya sa iyo. Bigyan mo lang siya ng kaunting oras..."

I nodded and then turned to my pet again. I don't really care if Valerie gets used to my presence or not. It's my house, after all. Nakikitira lang siya dito. So she'll have to live up to me, as much as I am going to live up to her. And if she's planning to make my life a living hell, then we'll take turns trying to ruin each other's day, every day. I refuse to be at the mercy of someone who doesn't even deserve respect. I'll treat her the way she treats me, because I know my mother will never approve of me bowing my head to a mistress.

I cleaned his wounds again and changed his bandage even though Barin was whining all the time. Hinayaan ko na siya sa grand parlor, just to get used to the new mansion. I went upstairs and decided I should sleep early today.

Dad just walked out of their room and smiled at me.

"You're going to rest, hija?"

"Opo." I replied, and then fastened my pace to get to my room.

"Anna, wait—"

I opened the door and to my surprise, I found someone else inside of my room. Samantha. Mukhang nagulat din siya nang makita ako. May kausap siya sa telepono at bakas ang inis sa mukha niya nang tuluyang makilala kung sino ako. She quickly hung up and crossed her arms over her breasts.

"Don't you know how to knock?" she asked cattily, raising an eyebrow at me.

"I don't usually knock at my own room, Samantha. I'm not stupid."

"It's not your room anymore."

Parang dinudurog ang puso ko nang mapagtanto kong maaaring tama nga siya. The rose and cream wallpaper have been changed into a glaring wallpaper with red and white scheme. I still have my queen-sized bed, and my walk-in closet must probably still there. But I'm not sure where my clothes are. The room looks very different. It isn't the same, comforting room I used to have now that Samantha is the one occupying it.

"Ano pong ginagawa niya sa kwarto ko, Papa?" tanong ko, sabay turo kay Samantha na ngayon ay mukhang naiirita na talaga sa akin.

Papa sighed again, and then walked up to me. "Ibinigay sa kaniya ni Valerie ang kwarto mo nung ikinasal kami. She changed it a bit, but it's still your room."

"Please don't tell me that I'm going to share a room with her."

"No, of course not. You'll sleep temporarily in the guest room while I try to think of a solution about this. Gustong-gusto din kasi ng kapatid mo ang kwartong ito."

The word he just mentioned just made me sick to my stomach. Samantha will never be my sister, let alone my friend. The girl hates me. I only hated their mother but now she's adding to the list of problems that I am worrying about.

"Try to show some generosity, Anna..." Valerie suddenly butted in, and I was annoyed to see her again with a cocktail in her hands. She raised an eyebrow at me. "Your mother will never be proud of that nasty attitude of yours, kicking your poor sister out of her room."

"Valerie, she's not kicking out Samantha." Papa corrected.

"Well, she surely made it sound like it!" Valerie insisted and then turned to me with catty eyes. "We did you a favor of letting that animal—" she pointed to Barin downstairs, who seems really uncomfortable in his new home. "—stay here."

I wanted to protest again, but I remembered my manners. Apparently, Valerie is not only an immoral woman. She's a dull one. She doesn't understand the concept of ownership, she's too self-centered, and wants everything to be about her. Dealing with her in just a few minutes is so draining. Now I'm starting to get afraid of how I'm going to deal with her every day of my life.

"Pwede bang huwag na muna kayong mag-away? Valerie, kakarating lang namin. Pagpahingahin mo na muna si Anna."

"The guest room is always open for her, dear."

"Sa guest room nalang po ako matutulog, Papa." I finally said, just to end this senseless conversation. I don't want to be toxic and throw away my manners just because Valerie is around. She's managed to ruin my family but not my elegance and legacy. I promised it to my mother. Limang taon lang naman ang kailangan kong tiisin kasama si Valerie at ang mga anak niya. I could get away from them or kick them out of the mansion once I turn 23.

Pumasok ako na pagod na pagod sa guest room. I collapsed in the bed and stared at the wall. I know I am not just tired because of the travel, but because of dealing with Valerie. She makes my head ache.

The phone I've been ignoring all day long vibrated softly, and I glanced at the screen only to find Blake calling me. My heart leapt to my throat. Mabilis akong bumangon at sinagot ang tawag niya.

"Blake...?"

"Anna." Came his baritone voice from the other line. Immediately, I heaved out a sigh of relief. "Nakauwi na ba kayo?"

"Oo. Kaninang hapon kami dumating sa mansion." I told him, biting my lower lip.

"And... how was it?"

"Terrible." I groaned. "I don't think I'll be able to live with Valerie for five years. Ngayon pa lang ay gusto ko nang umalis dito. So much has changed in the mansion."

"Is there something I can do?" he asked genuinely.

I felt guilty for a moment when I realized that Blake has been nothing but a patient man to me. For the past two months, he's heard nothing but complains form me. I was so ungrateful and in pain that sometimes, I vented it out to him when he's only trying to be there with me.

"Nothing, really..." I said softly.

"Are you sure? Anna—"

"I just want you to stay the same."

"Stay the same?"

"Yes. So much has changed and I don't want you to be part of the unwanted changes, Blake. I want you to be just the way you are."

"You know I'd do anything for you, baby..."

A small ghost of smile touched my lips. I can't imagine someone as intense, as brutal as Blake would be so gentle to me. It was so refreshing and... flattering.

"Thank you."

"I'll call you again tomorrow morning."

"Okay."

"And Anna?"

"Yes?"

"I'm always here for you. Tandaan mo yan..."