Chapter 15

The carpet feels so soft against my bare feet as I slowly walked into the hall. It was half past midnight, and the lights are off. Papa rented an Airbnb villa that housed the Sobreval men and some important relatives who attended the funeral of my mother and grandmother.

"I feel so useless, Dad..." bumagal ang paglalakad ko nang marinig ang pamilyar na baritonong boses. It depressed me how the voice sounded so down, so hopeless. I know it's all because of my little outburst earlier. "Anna is hurting right now and I couldn't do anything about it."

Nilapitan ko ang bahagyang nakabukas na pinto kung saan nanggagaling ang boses. I heard soft noises of glass clinking and through the ajar door, I saw the Sobreval senior pouring himself a glass of brandy and handing it to Blake, who seemed in a foul mood tonight.

"It's not your fault, son. Don't blame yourself. It's natural for Anna to react that way. Hindi biro ang pinagdadaanan niya ngayon."

"I know."

"She just lost her mother and grandmother. Her grandfather is still fighting for his life. Her pet is badly wounded and her father made a colossal mistake of marrying that gold digger."

"Dad..."

He raised a weak palm to cut off Blake. "You can't judge me for being this angry, Blake. You know the story between me, Simone, and Anastasia. I am genuinely happy for both of them when they eloped and finally got married. Lahat ng mahihiling ni Simone, nasa kaniya na. Sinayang niya lang lahat."

"I don't know what to do with Anna, Dad..." he quietly murmured.

Cristophe Sobreval laughed roughly before taking a sip of his liquor. "De la Rua women are really hard to understand, Blake, let alone tame. Anna is a strong girl. She's taken after her mother. Huwag kang mag-alala at magiging maayos si Anna. But you need to be there for her."

"I feel so stupid. Sinundan ko siya mula La Union hanggang Negros Occidental at wala man lang akong nagawa para sa kaniya."

"Well, you did step into the fire to try and save Amelia Villafuerte, right? That speaks of something."

Blake let out a small groan and finally his eyes landed on the glass of brandy that was left untouched. He stared at it for a while, as if he could find answers in the amber liquid, before he let out a curse again and grabbed the bottle, downing the entirety of it in just one gulp.

Feeling really guilty for m nasty attitude earlier and for eavesdropping the conversation of the Sobrevals, I took a step back and silently walked back to my room. Namamaga pa rin ang mga mata ko sa kakaiyak. I wanted to stay in the tent and watch over my mother and grandfather, but Papa didn't allow me to. He said I needed some rest, and that I should rest well because I'm going to visit my grandfather in the hospital tomorrow.

I missed dinner earlier and slept until midnight. Ngayon lang ako nagising sa pagkakatulog at dahil na rin sa pagkirot ng tiyan ko. But when I heard of their conversation, my appetite vanished and I'm back to being sad again.

Going back to sleep didn't appeal to me anymore. I sat next to the sleeping Barin and waited for the sun to rise while I drown myself with thoughts of my mother and grandmother who both passed away in a tragic death. I tried writing a short poem for them, since I couldn't get myself to write a eulogy for my mother and grandma, but it seemed so phony to me that I tore the piece of paper angrily and threw it away.

Barin glanced at me with a worried look on his face. I smiled sadly and patted his head.

"I'm gonna be okay..." I said, convincing both myself and Barin.

I showered, even though my eyes are burning and my body tired, and dressed in a simple white dress and flat shoes. Inilugay ko ang mataas na buhok para kahit papaano ay matakpan ang namamaga kong mga mata. I put on a pair of black-tinted sunglasses and applied a thin shade of lip tint. Sobrang putla ko na. I went downstairs to have a quiet breakfast with my father and the Sobrevals.

Tahimik ang buong villa habang naglalakad ako patungo sa kusina. I could hear quiet murmurs by the terrace, and the soft clanking of plates and glasses. When I stepped into the kitchen, I froze when I saw it was Blake who was preparing breakfast for all of us.

He's not wearing a shirt and his jeans are hanging low on his hips. If we were in other circumstances, I would've fainted at the sensual sight of him so early in the morning. But my heart is still aching and my soul mourning that I have to clear my throat like a strict 45-year old math teacher.

"Blake."

"Anna..." bahagyang nagulat si Blake nang makita ako. Mabilis niyang hinablot ang kaniyang t-shirt at tumalikod sa akin bago ito dali-daling isinuot. I averted my gaze away and remained standing. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you're up."

Binigyan ko siya ng maliit na ngiti. If he had been drinking all night, no one would suspect it the way he acts this morning. His eyes are clear and his breath smells terrific. Iyon ang una kong napansin habang papalapit ako sa kaniya. No signs of brandy from last night.

"Are you hungry? Dad and Tito Simone are outside. Dex went out to jog..."

"I'm good." I replied quietly, suddenly realizing that I am the only girl in this villa. Valeria whined when she saw the rented villa and declared that she would be staying in one of the expensive hotels downtown. I talked sternly to Papa last night and told him that I don't want to see that woman's face in the last precious days with my mother, and he promised he won't allow Valerie to interfere again.

"Anna, I know you're mad at her. Sa tingin ko nga ay hanggang ngayon hindi mo pa ako napapatawad..." Papa said softly last night. "But I promise to make it up for the two years that I've lost with you. Valerie may be a bit too much to handle, but she's a terrific mother. I've seen how she cared for Steve and Samantha. Mabuti siyang ina, Savannah."

Not and will never be as good as my mother, I wanted to reply, but I kept my mouth shut. Tumango nalang ako at nagpaalam na pupunta na sa kwarto. Our conversation last night lingered inside of my head as I cried silently for the loss. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala sa mga nangyayari.

"Anong gusto mo? Kape? Gatas? O tubig?" alok pa ni Blake sa akin. Instead of answering, I stepped into his arms and hugged him. He seemed tense at first, but after a few seconds, I felt him hugging me back. Tighter.

"I'm sorry..." he murmured and kissed the top of my head.

I closed my eyes and gently shook my head. "No. Ako dapat ang mag-sorry. It was very immature of me to be angry at you, Blake. Wala kang kasalanan."

"Hindi ko sinabi sa iyo na nagpakasal ulit si Tito Simone dahil alam kong wala ako sa lugar para magsabi. If there's someone who should break the news to you, it should be your father. Not me. Alam kong masasaktan ka, pero mas masasaktan ka kung sa akin pa iyon nanggaling."

I nodded again. "I understand, and thank you."

"God, I was so damn worried last night..." he said in a raspy murmur. "I'm not worried that you're mad at me. I'm worried that I might've inflicted more pain to you by not saying the truth."

I wanted to melt in his hug. It was so comforting to know that someone still treats my heart as gentle as he could. Especially at this time when I'm in my most vulnerable state.

The sound of a baritone clearing his throat tore the two of us apart. Mabilis akong umatras at kung hindi sa braso ni Blake na hinigit kaagad ako ay baka natumba pa ako sa panic.

"Good morning, Anna, Blake..." Cristophe Sobreval said with a knowing grin on his face. Nahihiya akong sumagot pabalik habang si Blake naman ay prenteng nakatayo sa tabi ko. "Luto na ba yan? O babalik nalang ako mamaya?"

"It'll be ready in a few minutes, Dad."

"Good." Then he turned to me. "Anna, your father is waiting outside the terrace. I think he has something to say to you."

Nagkatinginan muna kaming dalawa ni Blake bago ako tumango at umalis. I still don't want to talk to anyone right now and dreaded the idea that Valerie must be here, joining us for breakfast. I was a bit relieved to see my father sitting alone in a rocking chair, facing the beautiful view of the fields.

"Papa..."

He turned to me. Kumunot ang noo niya. For a moment, he looked confused. He opened his mouth but closed it again, contemplating for a few moments.

"Papa, okay lang po ba kayo?" medyo nag-aalala kong tanong sa kaniya.

"I'm... fine." He shook his head, as if a button has been switched and he is back to his normal self again. "Sit down, Anna. I need to tell you something."

Papa told me that the insurance company called, and Lolo Ferdie would be receiving a huge amount of money for the fire damage. But since he's still in a coma, the money would be given to the nearest relative and that would be me. When he disclosed the amount of money, my eyes widened a bit. It's more than enough to fix the damages in the mansion. Sa tingin ko nga ay makakapagtayo pa ako ng isang panibagong bahay gamit ang perang iyon.

But that money isn't mine. It belongs to my grandfather.

"Since you are a Villafuerte, you will be the one to receive the money."

I nodded again, telling him that Lolo will wake up and I would be giving him the money once he does. He'll repair the damages in the mansion and both of us will start a new life again.

"About that Anna..." Papa seemed hesitant for a bit, then he let out a sigh. "Gusto sana kitang ibalik sa La Union."

I stared at him for a while, stunned at what he'd said. He then explained that he wanted me to go back with him to La Union, so that he'd be able to care for me now that my mother is gone.

"Hindi pa po gising si Lolo. Papa, hindi ko po siya pwedeng iwan mag-isa dito sa Negros!"

"I know, Anna..." he seemed calm when he replied, as if he knew that I would get upset and had readied himself for my protests. "Kaya hihintayin natin na magising siya. Then I'll take him with us back to La Union. He can't live here alone. I know he's just going to hate me and probably make my life a living hell for hurting his daughter... but I can't let him live alone again. He'd be depressed now that Amelia's gone."

I stayed silent for a moment, thinking over what he said. It was reasonable, and if I'm going to stay with my father and Valerie, it would be less painful knowing that my Lolo would be here by my side. I know he's going to protect me, and he will not let me go with my father alone. Barin will come, too.

After a short while, I nodded in agreement. I became hopeful of my Lolo waking up so that we all could go home to La Union. What happened here is a real tragedy, and it would take some time to heal the wounds and move on. I am barely an adult, and all of this is already happening to me. I needed to be rational and think about my grandfather.

I visited my grandfather that afternoon, and was heartbroken to see that he's still unconscious. It was dreadful to see, even for an 18-year old girl like me, all the tubes and machines that are connected to his body. My last conversation with him was when he was calling out for his wife and daughter who are still trapped inside the burning mansion. I don't want it to be our last talk.

Palipat-lipat ako sa hospital at sa funeral house kung saan nakahimlay sina Mama at Lola. More and more people attended. I never saw Valerie again, which was a relief. I wanted some peace of mind while I spend the last few days with my mother and to properly bid goodbye to her.

Papa asked me for the eulogy, and I was ashamed I couldn't give him one. I told him I'd just talk impromptu, and during my speech about my mother, I broke down in front of everyone and cried again.

"This I know..." I said through my tears. "That I will live the rest of my life remembering my mother and my grandmother. Their elegance will never fade. My mother's glamour will live on..."

Matapos na mailibing sina Mama at Lola ay hindi na ako sumama pa kay Papa na naghanda ng pagtitipon para sa mga dumalo. I went back to villa to change clothes and then slept the entire afternoon. Nang magising ako ay pinakain ko si Barin at naisipang bisitahin ulit si Lolo ngayon sa hospital.

"The initial investigation of the fire says that it's a faulty electric wiring in the kitchen..." narinig kong pag-uusap ni Papa at ni Tito Cristophe.

Tito Cristophe frowned. "Are you sure that's it? A faulty wiring? Kilala nating dalawa si Ferdinand Villafuerte, Simone. He's a responsible man. He's been managing a lot of properties and wouldn't let a faulty electric wiring spark a fire threat to his house, especially where his family resides."

"Ito ang lumabas sa imbestigasyon. I told them to dig deeper..." Papa said, rubbing his temples as if he's about to have a headache. "Maraming kaaway si Ferdinand, Cristophe. Maraming naiinggit sa kanya. Don't you think it's a sabotage?"

"It could be..." Tito Cristophe drank from his brandy again, as if asking for strength to get over the fact that someone, an evil person has plotted the death of my family. "But how do we know who it is?"

"I'm going to hire private investigators, Cristophe." Papa said with determination. "I'm not going to let Anastasia's death be one of the many unsolved cases. Justice is the least thing I could give to her, after everything I've done."

"Simone to be honest," he placed a hand on Papa's shoulder and looked him straight in the eye. "Father-to-father talk... I'm worried about Anna. Anong gagawin mo ngayon? Patitirahin mo siya sa mansion kasama si Valerie?"

"You make it sound like Valerie would do something bad to Anna, Toph." Papa made a disapproving look.

"Baka hindi kayanin ng bata, Simone. Nawalan siya ng nanay at lola. Sa tingin mo makakapag-adjust siya kaagad kapag ibinalik mo siya sa mansion kasama si Valerie at ang mga anak niya?"

"What am I supposed to do? I can't leave my daughter here alone!"

"I don't know, Simone. But ultimately, you have to make a choice between Valerie and Anna... Sino ba ang mas matimbang sa iyo, ang anak mo o si Valerie?"

I didn't want to hear what my father would say and immediately walked away. I've been hearing conversations that I'm not supposed to hear and wanted to just shrink as little as I can. I feel like I'm a burden to my father and his new family, if he's going to take me home. I badly need my grandfather to wake up, so I can confide into him. He'd know what to tell me to calm down, and what to do in this complicated situation.

The days that followed the burial of my mother and grandmother were long and sad. When I'm not in the hospital, I would spend my time in my room, sitting in the bed and crying silently.

Dex was kind enough to offer me games and food whenever he sees me, just to lighten up my mood. I declined all of his invitations. The atmosphere in the villa is so gloomy. Tito Cristophe had been drinking almost every night and sometimes, I'd see him argue with my father.

Papa seems always tired and would force a weak smile whenever he sees me. Nginingitian ko naman siya pabalik pero wala pa rin sa loob ko na maging masaya. After everything that happened, I don't think I have a right to be happy anymore.

Three weeks later, Dexter and Tito Cristophe bid goodbye and said they needed to go back to La Union, to care for the hacienda, and to attend their businesses. Blake volunteered to stay.

"Hindi pa sigurado Blake kung kailan kami babalik ng La Union. Hinihintay naming magising si Lolo." I told him, but he still insisted.

"It's fine, really. I could live in a hotel while you and your father wait for Ferdinand Villafuerte to wake up. I'm not leaving you, Anna."

Hindi na ako nakipagtalo pa sa kaniya. He's got nothing to lose if he stays here for a longer time. He'd long graduated and has finished his master's degree. Sometimes, with Blake's god-sculpted face and perfect body, I forget how brilliant he is. He's a topnotcher, after all. I heard he's still working on his thesis for his doctorate degree while helping to manage their hacienda. Him being here wouldn't interfere with the life he left in La Union.

Every night I prayed to God to wake my grandfather. I wanted to be with him as soon as I can. When my father abandoned me, he became my father and even greater than that. He gave me Barin. He made me feel like I'm a special girl and he protects me. Gusto ko siyang magising ulit. I can endure all pain of being with Valerie and her children as long as I have my grandfather.

Two months later, the hospital called with bad news and said that my grandfather is not responding to the food and medication anymore. Umiiyak ako habang nagmamaneho si Papa patungo sa hospital. We stayed there overnight, until his condition became stable.

I thought it was over and he was finally waking up.

But four days after he first showed signs of getting back to life, Ferdinand Villafuerte peacefully died in his sleep.