Sam and I finished up at the gym and she agreed to come and get me at 6 pm to head over to Kelley's. Once I got back to my room I had a quick shower and washed my blonde locks. I then dried my hair and straighten it but opted to wear my black baseball cap. I put on my blue Fred Perry polo shirt on and my black ripped jeans. I tied my red hoodie around my neck and applied a small amount of makeup. I decided I wanted to show off some of my tattoos so rolled my sleeves up a little. Most of the girls had already seen them and Sam had even seen the ones on my back but I liked showing the ones on my arm. I grabbed my silver watch and heard a knock at the door. It was Sam.

She wore her hair down and it looked good, she was wearing a pastel pink t-shirt and a pair of ripped white jeans and was about the same height as me. She also wore a pair of thin frames, I had never seen her wear glasses but they suited her. Her style was very similar to mine. "Hey good looking are you just gonna stand there?"  Sam spoke confidently. She smiled and turned on her heels towards Kelley's room. I couldn't deny it, she looked amazing. I tried to block the thoughts and just followed her.

"Do they mind me coming along?" I asked shyly.

"No of course not and besides I wanna get to know you better" she blushed a little as she knocked on Kelley's door. I just stood there wondering what I was doing. If I was thinking about Beth I wouldn't even be here. But I wasn't ...

"Hey, Sam you actually came!" Kelley shouted wrapping her arm around her and Sam awkwardly hugged her back.

"Yeh well, I found a straggler on the way" she laughed looking at me.

The evening was fun but we all needed an early night as we played the next day so Kelley kicked everyone out of the room leaving me and Sam outside my door.

"Thanks for tonight it was fun" I spoke softly. Sam brushed a piece of hair out of my face and started to lean in. A brief moment of panic struck as I realised what was happing. I moved my face away.

"I'm sorry I can't" I whispered, my heart was beating at a million beats per second. This girl was quite something if she had this effect on me. But I remembered Beth and I wasn't one to cheat. "I have a girlfriend"

"I know" she muttered back removing her hand from my face. I couldn't take it any longer the tension was too painful. I grabbed her neck and pulled her close to me, clashing my lips to hers in a heated motion. Our lips moved together perfectly and I could feel the heat rush to my head. I wasn't thinking. It only lasted a few seconds before we heard someone come round the corner.

I quickly let go of Sam, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that" I turned around quickly and opened my door.

"Rose wait" I felt a hand grab my arm, "don't shut me out, I won't tell anyone this happened" sams expression spoke a million words. It actually looked like she cared for me.

"Goodnight Sam" I let go of her hand and shut my door. "Shit" I shouted but then noticing Amber was in the room in her bed on her phone.

"Hello to you too" she glanced at me. "What happened to you?"  She asked.

"Fuck I've done a bad thing" I shouted burring myself into my covers.

"Hey Rose c'mon talk to me" she spoke softly.

"I just kissed Sam" I spoke with a tear falling down my cheek.

"Wow ok, I didn't see that one coming" She stifled a smile. "How do you feel about it?"

"Like shit" I stated

"Yeh that wasn't a good question" she apologised. "Look your just gonna have to talk to Beth about it and Sam tomorrow" she comes over and hugged me. "I'm sure she will understand"

"I doubt it" I whispered. I felt so guilty but somewhere deep down I couldn't help how I felt about Sam. I just wanted to forget about everything.

I got on my gym stuff and went for a run. I was on my fifth lap of the pitch when I saw Kelley walk over. "Hey Rose don't mean to interrupt but come here" it was nearing 11 so the pitch was lit up by the floodlights. I ran over and sat with Kelley on the small wooden wall.

"I'm guessing Sam told you what happened?" I questioned drinking my water.

"Not exactly that's why I'm out here talking to you" she looked at me with a brief smile. "I mean as much as I admire you running out here at this time, I think there's probably something up."

"Yeh well it's complicated" I muttered regaining my breath.

"Maybe but iv been told I'm a good listener." She laughed "Look, Rose, Sam is a closed book I've been playing with her for 3 years now so I know when she's upset or hiding something. I've also seen how she looks at you" I thought about what Kelley said.

"I've known her 2 days and I am known for falling quickly for people but I have a girlfriend" Kelley gave me a knowing look.

"That explains a lot" she smiled. "I know I might come across as unapproachable and your captain, but I'm here for everyone and I can see that you're going to be a regular for our team and maybe even the women's team, so if you ever need anyone to talk to come find me"

"Thanks" I smiled. We both got up and went back into the hotel.

Amber was already asleep so I snuck into bed and fell asleep.

The next morning felt like a bad hangover, even though no alcohol had been consumed. It was match day so we were all getting ready to get on the coach. I decided I should try to avoid Sam so I didn't complicate things further. I was going to sit next to Georgia but she had to sit next to the coach as he wanted to speak with her. I sat on my own, half hoping no one would sit next to me. I put my headphones on max volume and looked out the window. I saw Sam get on the coach and she walked past trying to get me to look at her but I continued to fix my glance outside. The journey wasn't too long so we got there for 11 ready for our match at 1 pm.

We all gathered in the changing room and the manager gave us a quick talk before we went out to train on the pitch. Me and Jules went with the goalkeeper coach, Tim, who was very helpful. Jules was a little worried as she picked up a slight injury in her last game but she seemed okay for the moment. We trained for 30mins and went back into the changing room getting our kits on.

It was a very proud moment putting on my England kit on for the first time. "Hey, Rose let me get a photo for your insta" Kelley shouted as she saw me hold up my yellow goalkeeper shirt. I held it up with my name on the back, R.Wells no. 55
Jules had the no.1 kit but I didn't mind. "I'll send it to ya give me a sec" Kelley shouted over the other girls talking.

Sure enough, it popped up on my phone and I immediately put it on my Instagram. I captioned it 'forever grateful putting on this shirt. Let's start this journey with a win 🦁🦁!'

"Right girls listen up, today's game won't be easy. We will need to work hard for the space and get in behind them. Jules your starting in goal, Amber, Kris, Robin, Chelsea at the back, Kelley and Morgan in the middle, June and Sofia our on the wing with Emily in the middle and Sam as our main striker. The rest I want to see you make an impact from the bench" the manager shouted "good luck and have fun girls! Out you go to warm up, we only have a small crowd today but make them like you and they could push us towards a win!"

Everyone started leaving as I was finishing up taping my fingers and putting my gloves on. I started to leave when I felt someone grab me. I turned around and saw Sam stood there shyly. "Rose I'm sorry-I don't know what to say really" she sighed.

"Don't apologise it was me that started the kiss" I whispered disappointed in myself. "Good luck out there" I turned and left but was pulled back and felt the warmth of sams lips on mine. Before I could react she let go of me and broke away. "I had to do that one more time I'm sorry" and she walked off leaving me on my own very confused and guilty. I looked at my phone and had a missed call from Beth but she had left a message.

Beth- haven't heard from you for a while. Good luck today x

I turned my phone off and decided to focus on the game ahead.

We all lined up on the halfway line and sang the national anthem. It was a moment I had dreamed of since I was little and it felt unreal. I wished my dad could watch me play but I knew it was impossible and I was lucky to even be there.

I took my place on the bench with Georgia sat next to me. It was a close match and was still 0-0 at the half. Sam had a few chances but they were easy for the keeper. "Cmon Sam concentrate!" I heard the manager shout. 70 minutes had been played and England was starting to dominate. Kelley had the ball out wide and crossed it into Sam. She beautifully volleyed it and it went top corner. It was a superb goal and we all celebrated.

It was the 75th minute and the coach decided to make a sub Georgia was going on for her first international debut. It was number 7 coming off. Sam. She walked over high Fiving all the coaches. The only empty seat was next to me so she carefully sat down out of breath.

"Great goal" I looked towards her and smiled.

"Thanks" she smiled out of breath. She gently rested her hand on my knee. This girl was driving me crazy. I gave her a confused look but she just turned and started talking to one of the other girls next to her not removing her hand. I continued to watch the game trying to ignore the gesture but eventually, I got up and went and talked to one of the coaches. As much as I enjoyed sams touches I couldn't afford to do something else stupid.

It wasn't long until the full-time whistle went and we won 1-0. I didn't get a chance to play but I wasn't bothered as I was just glad I was here. I was the first one out of the changing room as I needed to hear a familiar voice. I went and sat on a bench near the coach and scrolled through my contacts till I found the name I was looking for. Beth.

"Hey, you how did it go?"She asked excitedly down the phone, making me feel even worse. "Umm Yeh it was good" I stuttered a little. It was hard talking to her as I felt so guilty.

"What's up you sound off?" She asked sincerely.

"Beth I messed up" I sighed down the phone feeling a tear fall.

"What? How?" She asked. I stayed silent for a while until I felt more tears running down my cheek. "Rose you're worrying me"

"I don't- I just- Beth I messed up big time!" I cried a little more.

"Just tell me-"

"I kissed another girl" I stopped "I'm so sorry" Beth fell silent. "Please don't leave me" I sobbed.

"I don't know what to say" Beth spoke with emptiness. "Why did you do it?"

"I don't know I wasn't thinking it just happened" I could sense what Beth was going to do.

"Do you still want to be with me?" She asked sobbing a little.

"What? Of course, I do. The kiss was a mistake that won't happen again I promise! I can even come home early if you want to talk about it properly. You mean so much to me and I don't want to lose you!" I was half begging half crying.

"Rose I think we need to take a break, I don't think we are in the right position in our lives to do this" Beth said with a little confidence. I stayed silent. I knew what she was saying was probably true I just didn't want to believe it.

"Beth please-"

"Rose I'm doing what's best for both of us, iv been thinking a lot since you have been away and we both want different things! We rushed into something we couldn't sustain, and you kissing another girl had just clarified that. We haven't been dating long but if it was meant to be we will find our way back to each other when the timings better" I couldn't believe what I was hearing I really did mess up.

"I understand" I sniffed a little. "But don't shut me out of your life, I still want to be friends with you even if I would prefer us to be girlfriends friends is better than not." I proposed not wanting to lose Beth completely.

"Ok," she whispered. We both fell silent.

"Beth I did love you, I just wanted you to know that"

"I know but like I said the timing wasn't great" Beth muttered "I was going to tell you when you got back but I will tell you now, I'm moving back to America with my mum- it's where I belong" I felt even worse now.

"So I won't get to see you?" I asked a little shocked

"It's for the best" she sighed "goodbye Rose"

I didn't want to say it but I knew I had to "goodbye Beth"

The call ended and I just stared at my phone wondering the fuck just happened. I had lost one of the most important people in my life because of a stupid mistake. I knew it was my fault and I saw it coming I just didn't think. I still felt tears falling down my cheeks.

I saw some of the other girls make their way to the coach including amber. She saw me sat on the bench and made her way to me. "I'm guessing that was Beth?" She looked at my phone and my red puffy eyes.

"Yeh" I barely spoke. She sat next to me and put her arm around me. I rubbed away my tears and tried to regain composure. "I'm sorry I should be congratulating you, you played really good!" I smiled and got up making my way to the coach. I put my headphones on max volume and rested my head on the window not wanting to speak to anybody.

Kelley saw that I was upset and stood above me. I took my headphones off and looked up at her. "This seat taken?" She asked softly.

"Nope" I muttered and put back on my headphones. Kelley sat down and removed my headphones. I huffed and turned to face the window.

"Rose talk to me" she softly spoke. "I know you not upset about the game as you were happy in the changing room. I saw you outside on the phone and it looked like a pretty heated phone call!"

"Everyone good in my life leaves! First, it was my dad, then my brother and now Beth. My mum has a problem with alcohol and really doesn't give a shit about me. So I'm sorry if I'm not in a particularly good mood" I felt a tear fall down my cheek.

"Cmon let's go for a walk, the coach doesn't leave for another 20mins" Kelley stood up motioning me to follow. I really didn't want too but for some reason, my legs dragged me out of the coach.

"I don't have a clue what's gone on in your life and I don't expect you to tell me but I want you to know that you can talk to me, I don't want this to ruin your chance with football!" She sighed. "I'm taking Beth was is your girlfriend?" She asked stopping and looking at me.

"Was my girlfriend, I told her what happened"
Kelley gave me a confused look. "Sam didn't tell you" I muttered and Kelley shook her head. "I kissed Sam, I know I'm a bad person you don't have to tell me" Kelley just gave me an apologetic look.

"Shit I didn't know what happened, how did Beth take it?" She asked.

"Not well she broke up with me and is moving back to America to live with her mum" I sighed.

"Oh....wow that does suck"

"Yeh it does, we argued a lot about football last week but it's only now that I realise she was right and it was a bad idea to play as it ruined our relationship" I spoke truthfully.

"Rose if she didn't support your dream maybe she wasn't the one, we have all made sacrifices to get to this level, it's not easy but I promise on the long run you will get what you want. Your 18, relationships at your age never last. Just focus on what you love doing and it will make everything around you a lot easier. You said your dad and brother left?"

"Yeh my brother left for uni and my dad left to go live in America" I sighed.

"Well, it won't be long until you get into a professional club and you will be playing at a high level every week, then you might even get a scholarship in America so you can see your dad. You're definitely good enough!" She exclaimed as we walked back to the coach.

"Thanks, Kelley for listening to my shit" I smiled at her feeling a little better after talking to someone.

"I told you I'm a good listener" she punched my shoulder lightly. " I'll leave you to it if you need me just come and find me! Next stop Czech" she smiled walking to the back of the coach. I smiled and returned to my seat. The rest of the girls got on the coach, still celebrating the win. Sam was jumping up and down with the other girls singing chants. They all settled down and Georgia sat next to me. "Hey g!" I smiled. She smiled back and started rambling away about something. Sam walked past our seats and I tried to get her attention by looking at her but she just ignored me and went and sat with Kelley. I looked back and Kelley gave me a knowing look.

"Rose are you even listening I was telling a funny story" Georgia moaned gaining my attention again.

"Nope Sorry" I tried to laugh, forgetting what had happened in the previous hour. "Tell me again"