"I loved you in spite of deep fears that the world would divide us. So, baby, can we dance. Oh, through an avalanche?" Dancing With Our Hands Tied by Taylor Swift

DISCLAIMER(?): there a cameo of DK from Seventeen (cause I didn't know who to put as a host for the radio). He might be a bit out of character but this is fiction, so who cares?

Whatever plan they'd hatched the night before was easier said than done. Truly, it was simple, they just had to stutter whenever they spoke about each other and not make much eye contact. Just be polite enough to not be called a bitch, Jaeyun had joked to herself, but as she sat down in the waiting room outside of the radio room, she couldn't avoid fidgeting with some threads of her ripped jeans, deciding to ignore the many texts she'd gotten from Raon and Yua before even arriving.

Aside from that plan, they'd also decided to tell the members about their relationship that same night. Just the simple thought of the members reaction made her more nervous.

The door opened, ripping Jaeyun away from her trance as he looked up and quickly regretted it. Jay and his manager, who was in a heated phone call, walked inside. Jay was looking down at the floor in the brief glance Jaeyun took of him, hands in pockets, no knowing what to do. Whatever his manager was complaining about on the phone, it must've been bad cause Jaeyun couldn't understand a single word coming from the man's mouth. He was speaking so fast and angrily that Jaeyun just decided to tune out his voice, finally looking down at her phone and answering quickly with some emojis to the girls before opening her instagram.

"Jay hold on a second" she heard the manager mumble before the door opened again as he left, leaving the room silent.

Jay awkwardly stood in the middle of the room, frozen for a couple of seconds before he took his hands out of his pockets. Both Jaeyun and Jay didn't know why they felt so anxious about being alone in a room together, they've done it before. Maybe cause this felt more public? Probably. Jaeyun kept her eyes fixated on her phone, even though she wasn't even paying attention to it anymore. Not knowing what Jay was going to do made her more nervous, if it was possible, so even though she wasn't looking at him she was definitely paying attention to him, wondering if Jay's thoughts were as messy as hers.

Jay was thinking and feeling the same. He had reviewed the plan they'd made (in between kisses) a million times and he had come to the conclusion that it was fine, but suddenly being alone with her in a much more public place froze him. Without dwelling in it any longer, he sat down.

Next to her.

Jaeyun's eyes went wider as she kept looking at her phone, the arm that rested on the armchair next to her suddenly feeling in the wrong place. She wanted to remove it, just in case anyone walked in, but as she started the movement, Jay's hand laid closer, his body warmth engulfing her arm. She hadn't realized how cold she was until then. She side-eyed him, he had already pulled his phone out and was acting like what he'd just done was fine, normal even. Jaeyun decided not to care, look back at her phone and mindlessly scroll on whatever social media she wanted till they had to start the show.

But Jay's warmth only got closer.

It started with the side of his hand, grazing ever so lightly over her skin, barely noticeable. But Jaeyun noticed it once Jay's finger lingered above hers, almost waiting for her to pull away. Then again, they were in public, but at the same time, with no one else in the room, Jay just wanted to hold her hand. He knew how nervous she was.

So Jaeyun didn't move her hand away, she just kept her eyes glued to her phone. One of Jay's fingers tangled one of hers, slowly enveloping it till his entire hand covered hers. A shivering sensation ran all the way through Jaeyun's arm, almost tickling her heart. A small smile grew on her face as she finally felt herself relax onto the soft couch.

The door opened with a sudden sound and the relaxation was over. Both singers pulled their hands away in a swift move, praying the manager hadn't seeing anything suspicious. Them? Holding hands? Fake.

The metal hinges of the door scratched against each other, making Jaeyun scrunch her nose to avoid covering her ears "they should fix that door" the man said, quickly saving his phone inside of his jean pocket "sorry about that Jay" he apologized to him "oh, Jaeyun-ssi, I didn't see you there" he addressed her, but Jaeyun only nudged her head at him. She was afraid that if she even tried to speak her voice will quiver and it would give away... whatever had just happened.

Jay tried to hide a smirk while pretending to scratch his nose, making Jaeyun want to slap him, but she just closed her hand on a fist as she smiled, dull nails digging on her skin. Where was her manager? She was supposed to get her a coffee like 30 minutes ago.

[***]

"Alright, welcome, welcome back to iKiss radio show!" Seventeen's DK started, a bright smile on his face "as always, this your host, DK from Seventeen, but today I'm not alone, here we have..." he trailed off, subtly cueing Jaeyun to introduce herself.

"Hello everyone, this is Kwon Jaeyun from Evermore!" she said cheerfully to the microphone, looking around and trying to remember which camera was pointing at her.

"And alongside her we have..." he did the same with Jay.

"Hi, this is Park Jay from Enhypen!" he said, looking straight to one of the cameras as he waved his hand.

Jaeyun bit the inside of her cheek, hoping to avoid a smile growing on her face over his cuteness.

"Welcome, welcome" DK followed with the script, a smile always present on his face "so, Jay-ssi, Jaeyun-ssi, you both come from the same survival show, right?"

They both answered at the same time, making Jaeyun want to hold in a smile. Her foot stretched across the floor under the table, lightly tapping his foot. If he felt it and realized it was her, he didn't show it.

"Would you say that was one of the main reasons of your group's collaboration from last year?"

"I-"

"Mmm" both Jaeyun and Jay started at the same time, neither of them being able to contain their small chuckle at the coincidence.

"You go ahead" Jay said, gentleman as always.

"I don't think the only reason for the collab was the survival show" Jaeyun answered with a smile "Aside from being under the same company, our groups have similarities" she explained "though, one of the main reasons was the connection with our groups storylines"

"And, do you think the storylines will ever connect again?"

Jaeyun chuckled shyly "we are not the writers, so most of the time we know as much as you or our audience knows"

"There's going to be a web novel coming out about your group's story, right?" Jay asked from the other side of the table. Jaeyun was slightly surprised he was talking so specifically to her.

"I- Yes, yes. A webtoon is in the works" Jaeyun struggled out "I believe it'll come out later in the year, but I'm not sure" she said "there one of Enhypen too, right?" she quickly added, already predicting the awkward silence.

"Really?" DK said, turning his attention towards Jay.

"There's two currently out" Jay said, leaning against the microphone in a relaxed matter "one's finished, the other one's still coming out with new chapters" he explained "we're hoping for a new one later this year"

"And could there be a crossover with Evermore in that new web novel?" DK asked.

"We're hoping there'll be" Jaeyun said, bringing the attention back to her, next to the warmth of her face "but, like I said before, we're not sure"

She heard DK whisper a small 'okay' while looking down at his script and Jaeyun resisted biting her lip. Before she could say anything else, he raised his head, looked at one of the staff members and nodded his head.

"Okay, now we'll be going into a short pause" DK started "meanwhile, listeners and watchers, remember you can leave questions for the guests under the phone number that was flashed at the beginning of the program" he explained "we'll be waiting here! See you in a bit!"

"See ya"

"Bye-bye"

DK pressed a button and through Jaeyun's headphones she could hear Enhypen's latest title track "Sweet Venom" playing. Jaeyun bobbed her head at the rhythm while thrumming her fingers on the table, remembering the few times she managed to sneak into their practice room to watch (technically help) Jay practice the choreography.

"Are you guys feeling okay?" DK asked, filling in the silence.

Jaeyun took off her headphones and rested them on her neck, a bit embarrassed "what?"

"I know you haven't appeared in many radio shows" he explained "I just wanted to make sure that everything was good"

"Oh!" Jaeyun exclaimed and smiled "yes, everything's good sunbae, you're a good host"

"Now you're just exaggerating" he said "I've done this a couple of times, but I always have to get better"

"No, really-"

"She's right" Jay said, quickly mouthing a 'sorry' at her "you're a good host sunbaenim"

"Well thank you" DK said, smiling while looking down at his script "to both of you" he added, making sure to glance at both of them "you're also doing a good job"

Jaeyun thanked him while also looking down, suddenly shy. She felt a small tap on her foot and pretended to fix her skirt as she looked under the table. Jay's hand was showing her a thumbs up. She nodded to show him she'd seen it, tucking a small strand of hair behind her ear to cover the action. She saw Jay smile out of the corner of her eye.

Jaeyun managed to sneak in another sip of her water before the red light, indicating they were on air, turned on again.

"We are getting the first call" DK said, glancing at the staff members who were controlling the calls coming through "Jaeyun-ssi, ladies first"

Jaeyun tried not to laugh at the comments as she fixed her headset, hoping she'll be able to hear the callers well.

"Hello?" a girl said on the other side of the line.

"Hi, this is DK with iKiss radio" DK started "this call segment is so you, the audience, can ask our guests, Kwon Jaeyun from Evermore and Park Jay from Enhypen for advice, it doesn't matter what" DK explained again "what's your question?"

Jaeyun heard the girl clear her throat before she started talking "So, in my school we have a small book club in my school and I've been attending to it for... about a year now" the girl started and Jaeyun made sure to show she was listening "and a couple of months ago a new guy joined and... I think I have a crush on him" the girl giggled "I just... I don't know how to flirt or how to talk to him, do you have any advice Jaeyun eonnie?"

Jaeyun tried to hide her own laugh at the irony of the ask, imagining Jay in the same situation as her.

"I... I wouldn't say I'm the best person for this advice" Jaeyun started, racking her brain to find good words to say "but... Didn't you say you guys were in a club together?" she heard the girl hum in response "well... what book are you reading right now? Ask him about it, ask him about his favourite books, how he joined the club" she gave options "you're probably gonna be nervous as you speak to him, so make sure to plan the conversation a bit, so you're sure what to do if there's any silence" Jaeyun explained "you sound like an interesting girl, so I'm sure he's interested too"

"Thank you eonnie!" the girl said on the other side of the line before it was cut off. Jaeyun tried to respond as fast as she could, but whoever the staff that was controlling it was, they were faster.

"Ah, young love" DK said, snapping Jaeyun out of her thoughts "so adorable, don't you think?"

"Yeah" Jaeyun answered "I was the same at her age, so I get it" she said, tucking another strand of hair behind her ear, hoping the camera couldn't catch the heat on her face.

As DK added more comments about the phone call and young love, Jaeyun was already doing a mental note of what thing she should've added to the advice. She always did this, she didn't know why, she just did. There are always ways to get better at something, and ever since Jaeyun decided to become and idol she knew she wanted to be able to bring comfort to her fans and people around her. She was, hopefully, off to a good start.

"We're getting another caller" DK announced "Jay-ssi, it's your turn" he said, quickly explained the topic of the call sketch to whoever the caller was, before re-directing them towards Jay.

"So, oh my god I didn't even think I was gonna get the call, what do I say?" Jaeyun heard the girl on the other side of the line start, then whisper most of her sentence. She pretended to scratch her lip to contain a smile "so, uhmm, I have... I have this... thing that I need some advice about" the girl said, taking a deep breath "there's this one girl on my friend group, we're 6 by the way, who sometimes... I don't know, she always ignores my texts, she never even tries to understand my plans for hangouts and dismisses them instantly and..." the girl trailed off, probably trying to find the words "and last month she forgot my birthday and I just... I don't know what to do" she explained "like, I always try to listen to her, give advice and let her know I'm there, friend or not, but she doesn't even try and... I don't know if it's even worth it, to keep trying I mean" the girl finished, letting out a sigh "like, at this point I don't care if she doesn't want to be my friend, it just worries me what it'll do to the dynamic of our group"

"First of all, if it changes the dynamic of your group, know it isn't your fault" Jay started saying "you tried being a good friend, she didn't care, you don't have any more reasons to keep trying" he said "obviously don't completely ignore her, like she does to you" he chuckled "but once you stop caring about the fact that she doesn't care it'll be easier to stop thinking about her" he kept going "I know it's hard, friendships are important and it hurts when someone doesn't care as much as you do, but right now you have to know that this doesn't mean you are any less worthy of good people in your life"

Both DK and Jaeyun stayed quiet, letting his words sink onto them and the girl on the other side of the line. Jaeyun only stared at him, hoping her eyes weren't showing all the love she was feeling. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see DK nodding along to what Jay had said.

Jay cleared his throat, clearly shy at the silence "when- when was your birthday?"

Even through the questionable quality of the phone call, Jaeyun managed to hear the girl gasp a little.

"May... May 1st" she said.

"Well, happy late-birthday" Jay said with a smile "I hope this helped you in some way"

The phone call cut off before the girl could say thank you, but as the interview kept going, everyone knew the girl was grateful for the advice.

Jaeyun managed to sneak a couple of glances at Jay throughout the interview, smiling a bit while pretending to scratch the side of her mouth or her nose.

He's so good.

[***]

"How was the show?" her manager asked as soon as she got into the car.

"It was good!" Jaeyun said with a smile, feeling her gears turning inside of her mind, forcing her smile "DK sunbaenim was really nice and warm about the whole thing" she explained "he really helped the nerves wash off"

"I'm glad you had a good time" the woman answered as she started the car "if you want we can sign you up for more appearances like this"

Jaeyun smiled politely "I'm not sure" was her only response, looking out the window to let her manager know she didn't want to talk anymore. That was a good thing about working with the same person for some time, they know you.

Even without wanting to, her thoughts circled back to the phone call Jay had with that engene. How soft his voice was, how much attention he was paying as soon as the girl said she needed advice. How much he cared.

He's so good.

She opened her eyes again, watching the cars drive past them as her manager took a right turn towards another street. She recognized she was been driven back to the company and vaguely remembered she had a dance lesson to get to.

Her phone vibrated on her hand.

Jay: Did you like the show?

Jay: Sorry we weren't able to talk much before the broadcast, I really wanted to see you

Jay: Are you free later today? I think I can sneak into your studio and we can tell the members about us

Jay: If you still want

Jaeyun locked her phone, looking at the window again. Using it while on a moving car always made her dizzy.

Thinking back to the phone call, that engene sounded young, maybe a year or two younger than Nara. How many young fans does Enhypen have? She knew it was just a stereotype, but she couldn't help herself wonder. So many fans, so many so young, and they already support them with so much energy and love. How much they were risking.

He's so loved.

Suddenly the feeling of her necklace, the one she shared with Jay, scratched her skin. It didn't matter how much she'll move it, it still hurt. She ended up unbuckling it and folding it carefully inside the pockets of her jeans.

"Did the stylist give you that necklace?" her manager asked from the driver's seat.

"No, it was- it was a gift from my sister" Jaeyun lied, quickly looking back out the window to let the woman know she wasn't up for talking more than that. Again.

Jaeyun: Better not tonight, I have dance practice

He's loved, he doesn't need me.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fun fact: a friend of mine (who knows nothing about kpop) read a couple of random chapters from this fic after I told him about it and actually got surprised when I told him Jaeyun didn't exist (like, she isn't an idol in the real world). Also, he doesn't know how wattpad works and was very confused while reading (which was entertaining).

Ngl this was me for most of this chapter

Still, I hope you liked this chapter, please remember to vote and comment (if you want to) and I'll see you next update! Bye!