~July 8, 2021~

I tossed and turned all night. My body wasn't used to these new surroundings yet and I missed Natalie so much. I wished she was by my side. I wonder if she feels the same way...

I let out a groan of annoyance. I was sick of this. That's when I stood up and quietly exited my room.

I crept down the short hallway and quickly ran outside. Once I was out, I sucked in a deep breath. It made me feel a bit better.

I just paced back and forth on the platform by the stairs when I suddenly felt something cut my arm. For some reason, I didn't mind the pain. In fact, I kinda liked it.

I looked down at my arm which was dimly lit up by the moon. I watched the slow drop of blood trickle down my arm. It was mesmerizing.

No, Benny, don't you dare get involved with that stuff. It's not good.

I shook my head and quickly covered it up with my hand. I felt the now cool-ish blood soak onto my bare hand. I should probably go back to bed...

N A T A L I E
point of view.

My groggy eyes opened. Today was the first day Benny was officially gonna be gone for good. I let out a sigh. Time flies by too fast.

I didn't even feel like getting up and getting all prettied up. There was no point. I had no one to impress anymore. Maybe talking to Benny will help.

I then picked up my phone, dialed his number, and put the phone to my ear. It rang for a few seconds until someone picked up.

"Hey." Benny's voice chirped from the other side of the phone.

"Hey," I smiled. "Sorry if I'm bothering you. I just wanted to check-in and see how things were going."

"You're okay. I was just about to call you." he chuckled.

I laughed with him. He then took a breath in to speak. "It's been okay, I guess. Still trying to get used to the change though."

I nodded even though he couldn't see it. "Yeah, that's understandable," I started. "I'm still trying to get used to you not being here."

"Yeah, how are the boys by the way? How are they holding up?"

My shoulders shrugged. "I mean, they're sad but I don't think they'll die 'cause of it."

Benny coughed out a laugh. "Knowing them, they probably don't even realize I'm gone. They're more hungover on girls and baseball."

I laughed. "Yeah, that sounds like them."

I then heard his mom call his name. "Benny, breakfast!"

"Okay, coming!" he shouted back. A sigh of sadness then left his mouth. "I gotta go."

"Okay, talk to you later?" I questioned.

"Of course."

A small smile painted my lips. "Okay, I love you."

"I love you more, beautiful." he swooned before blowing a kiss into the phone.

I let out a tiny giggle as I always did before he hung up. I set my phone back down and bit my lower lip. God, I'm obsessed with that kid.

B E N N Y
point of view.

I stuffed my phone into the back pocket of my jeans while I walked into the kitchen. The smell of pancakes and bacon wafted through my nose.

"Mmm," I hummed in delight. "Smells good, Ma."

She sent me a bright smile. "Thank you. I think you'll enjoy it."

I then sat down at the empty table. My mom set a plate filled with two pancakes drowned in syrup, and three pieces of hot, fresh bacon. I felt my mouth start to water.

"Thanks, Ma." I smiled.

She ruffled my hair. "Of course, Mijo."

I then began to dig in. My mom sat across from me and poked at her food.

"So..." she awkwardly piped up. "How do you like it here so far?"

I shrugged my slumped shoulders. "It's okay, I guess. I still really miss Natalie and the boys."

She nodded. "Yeah, I get that. But I know you'll make plenty of new friends here."

"Eh," I mumbled quietly. "Like I said yesterday, I don't really want any new friends right now. I'm perfectly fine with the ones I have."

"Well," she let out a sigh. "I know you're saying that now but when school starts up I think it'll be good for you to have at least one person you know."

I just hummed, showing her I wasn't that interested. She frowned. "Okay, well, what about the baseball team? Are you thinking about joining that?"

I stood up with my empty plate. "I don't know. I don't really like being on a team."

I heard her chair slide away from the table. "Why don't you at least try? It's a great way to make friends-"

I cut her off before she could finish. "Ma!" I shouted louder than I expected.

She froze in her tracks. I took in a deep breath. "Ma..." I said quieter. "I'm just trying to get used to everything right now, okay? Making friends is the last thing on my list but I promise I'll get to it, alright?"

She let out a long sigh. "Okay, but I just want you to be happy here. I feel really bad for taking you away from everything." she pouted as she grabbed both of my hands, rubbing her thumb on top of the back of them.

I smiled softly. "And I appreciate that, Ma. But I just need to take my time, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay."

I then kissed her cheek lightly before gently taking my hands out of her grasp.

"I'm gonna go talk to Natalie some more," I explained as I started to back away. "I'll just be in my room if you need me."

Her head nodded in understanding. I then spun around and ran off to my room.

••••

author's note:

I feel like this isn't true, but I feel like I've gotten a lot better at writing. especially if you've been here since the beginning and read my first ever book, you'll know I've improved a lot. you don't have to agree with me, but I'm proud of myself! stay gold, luvs💕
~Olivia🧸🤍

{9/16/21}