namjoon hated therapy. he hated everything about it. he hated how the woman had to dumb everything down for him because he never understood her straight away. he seriously thought every word that came out of her mouth was a lie.

"mom and dad just wanted the best for me" namjoon said as he played with his fingers, "yes, namjoon, i understand that. however, your lack of resources scarred you" the woman said, "no, it did not" he said, "explain that thought to me"

namjoon paused, staring into space as he thought of something to justify his answer, "i don't know how to explain it" he frowned.

"namjoon, denying your trauma won't be helpful in the long run. now, you're an adult who's able to afford many things you weren't able to afford when you were a child. your body and mind will continue carrying the traumatic experience until you confront it" the woman said, the boy grabbed one of the fidgets she had on a small table.

the woman waited to see if namjoon answered, but the boy didn't answer, he just continued looking at the fidget.

"i'm going to ask some questions that might be a little more triggering, okay? you don't have to answer if you want to" she said, "was it your parents that made you feel stressed about money?" the woman asked.

"before i talk, you should know that people always think i'm smart and what not. i graduated at 16 and snu begged me to go to their school, so it's safe to say i'm good at math and whatnot. my twin sister, eunji, was pretty average in school." he explained before continuing.

"when we went to stores, i was the one who dealt with all the numbers which included using the scales to weigh food, calculating the total, calculating the sales tax, and calculating the cost with coupons. well, i was involved with anything that had numbers like our bills every month" he said, the woman nodded.

"what did you feel whenever you saw those numbers?" she asked, "i felt really stressed and upset. i felt like a mini adult" he mumbled, picking at his skin.

"all those things must've caused you to mature a lot faster than you needed to, do you agree?"

namjoon bit his lip, "i guess" he sighed, "do you still do a lot of things you did as a kid as a result of that?"

he nodded, "yeah, i have a financing journal and going to the grocery store takes an eternity. whenever i go, i have to weigh the food, calculate the price per ounce, use coupons and offers, and calculate the total cost. my friends don't like it" he nervously chuckled, "what's in your financing journal?"

he took it out from his tote bag and handed it to her, "yoongi told me to bring it in case i mentioned it"

the woman flipped through the pages of the journal, she saw little messages in most of the entries.

—

'kim namjoon, you spent too much money on the gas bill this month. maybe stop cooking or don't shower as often. afterall, you don't really need to eat, it's not like you work that hard'

'kim namjoon, are you stupid? your gas bill went up 5 percent. it's the opposite of what you should be doing. you're so stupid and useless.'

—

"are you the one writing the little messages?" she asked, the boy nodded and let her read through it.

she handed it back, "it's genius, isn't it?" he smiled, "it's harming you, namjoon. i'm going to give you some homework today" she said, the boy whined.

"you're going to go to the grocery store and you're not going to do any math. i don't want you think about prices. think about what foods you want, no matter the price. you're going to buy it. after that, you're going to sit with your feelings and focus on working through them and no writing in your financing journal"

oh how amazing. this woman wanted her in a mental hospital.

—

she said he could bring yoongi to go shopping, so the couple was at the grocery store. the tall boy was sweating like crazy.

"i was thinking we make pasta for dinner" yoongi said as they headed towards the produce aisle, "we could" namjoon said, yoongi smiled hearing that.

namjoon placed some tomatoes in the cart, resisting the urge to weigh them and calculate the price.

yoongi watched as namjoon bit his nails and looked at all the food available, "can we get some bulk snacks? school is starting soon" the older one said, "we don't really need that right now" namjoon said, the smaller boy frowned.

"meanie head" he said, sticking out his tongue. namjoon walked into an aisle filled with cookies, he smiled looking at a particular box.

"i used to beg my parents for these" he sadly smiled, "they never bought me them, but my friends in middle school would get them for me" he said, yoongi felt his little heart break.

the boxes were small, so namjoon placed two in the cart. yoongi smiled, hugging his arm tight.

"you're doing so well, honey"

"thank you, sugar"

—

namjoon had paid a whopping 212 dollars and 46 cents on groceries, now he was freaking out. never in his life had he spent 200 dollars on food, the range always stayed in the 100's.

"let's go back and return things, please" he begged the small boy who was driving, yoongi shook his head and looked at the road, "you're going to be fine, i promise" yoongi softly spoke and made a turn.

"no! i won't!" he sniffled, tears falling down his cheeks, "honey, breathe" the small one said, panicking as he heard the boy hyperventilating next to him.

"n-no! let's go back! please!" he begged through tears, yoongi pulled into the closest parking lot, "namjoon, take a deep breath"

namjoon shook his head, he unlocked the door and made a run for it with a bag of groceries and the receipt in his pocket.

yoongi was a lot smaller, so he wasn't as good as namjoon at running. he had to think quick. the best thing he could think to do was jump on top of namjoon.

"aw fuck!" namjoon groaned, yoongi was sitting on top of him, "it's the best i could do" he said, attempting to catch his breath, "you scraped my elbows" namjoon said, he was still crying

"we can put some bandaids on at home, let's go" yoongi sternly said, namjoon hated that tone. he always felt like a scolded student.

yoongi had a tight grip on namjoon's arm as they walked back to the car. it wasn't a loving grip, it was a hurting grip. a grip that screamed 'test me and find out what happens'.

—

seokjin and jimin hummed as they looked around a day care they were checking out. of course, seokjin's mother made sure to recommend the best ones.

"well, are you guys liking it?" the woman that was helping them tour smiled, jimin nodded, "i like this place the most out of all the ones we've been to" jimin said, "me too"

the woman nodded, "did i also add that we send pictures every day on how the kids are doing? sometimes we send videos too" she said, jimin's eyes turned into small crescents, "so we'll get pictures of hyejin every day?" seokjin asked, "if that's what you sign up for"

"we're sending her here, seokjin" jimin smiled, no hesitation in his voice, the man nodded, "please send the paperwork over" seokjin bowed, the small boy was squealing.

—

yoongi put all the groceries away while namjoon laid in bed. the poor boy hadn't stopped crying.

he felt his heart break hearing namjoon cry. yoongi would wish day and night that he could take away namjoon's anxiety and pain.

the small boy brought namjoon one of the boxes of cookies he had bought for him to eat. namjoon held onto the box, tears running down his cheeks.

"eat some of those, okay?" yoongi spoke, sitting next to namjoon on the bed, "o-okay" he sniffled, gently opening the box.

he began munching on the cookies as tears ran down his cheeks. yoongi watched as the boy ate.

"i'm going to quit therapy, yoon" namjoon mumbled as he scrolled through his phone, "joon—"

"you can't convince me otherwise" namjoon said, yoongi bit the inside of his mouth, "do you think i like going in twice a week to talk about how a man threatened to rape me?" yoongi asked, looking at his thighs.

"no" namjoon mumbled, "do you think it's been easy for me to learn that not all touch is bad?" yoongi asked, "no" the boy answered again.

"exactly, joonie. you were there to witness everything firsthand. you saw me at my worst when i isolated myself from everyone and when i started shaking when you accidentally touched my hand. now, you get to see me healing. you get to hold my hand and do even more things with me" he said, namjoon nodded.

"but that's worse than what i went through. i don't care if she thinks it was traumatizing for me. i just don't think therapy is for me"

"anyone can go to therapy, namjoonie. it doesn't matter how big or small your problems are" yoongi said, placing a kiss on namjoon's forehead.

namjoon sniffled, wiping his tear stained cheeks, "o-okay, i'll keep trying. do y-you mind cuddling me?" he croaked, "i can cuddle you all you want" yoongi reassured the boy.

—

namjoon eventually fell asleep after all the crying and from yoongi's warmth. yoongi held him tight, occasionally pressing kisses on his forehead.

he felt horrible for namjoon. yoongi  knew what it was like to expose himself to triggers and he also knew it wasn't pleasant. in fact, it was the thing farthest from pleasant.

yoongi knew namjoon would hate exposing himself to triggers because namjoon tended to do everything to not do what he was afraid of.

"joonie" yoongi whispered, the tall boy hummed, "yes, sugar?" he sleepily mumbled, "are you feeling better?" he asked, "a little bit, i'm a frustrated i can't use my financing journal" he said, yoongi hummed.

"you're going to be okay" he reassured, making namjoon smile. the tall boy pulled yoongi closer to him.

—

jimin hummed as he heard babbling and giggling from hyejin's bedroom, he stopped cooking to go check on hyejin and seokjin.

the small boy opened the bedroom door to find both of them laying on their stomach and looking at eachother.

the baby and seokjin turned to look at jimin, "we're in the middle of a conversation" seokjin said, jimin tilted his head, "she can't talk"

seokjin hunmed, "watch" he said and turned to look at the little girl, "hyejin, what was it you were telling me about?" he asked, the little began babbling. she never formed and real words, but she babbled a lot.

"oh really? how'd you do that?" seokjin asked her, receiving more babbles. jimin's jaw could've touched the ground, "is that why i hear so much giggling and babbling when i leave you two alone?"

the oldest one nodded, "she's talkative like you" he smiled, jimin smiled back and sat down, "i want her to stay tiny forever" jimin frowned, picking her up and leaning her against his chest.

—

"ah, pasta with shrimp" namjoon smiled as yoongi served dinner, the small boy smiled back and sat across namjoon.

"i remember you really loved it on one of our dates, i thought it would make you feel better" yoongi said, namjoon felt his heart warm, "thank you, sugar"

namjoon often had a hard time eating because all he could think about was the price of what he was eating. the small boy noticed, he grabbed some pasta with chopsticks and put it in namjoon's mouth.

"i also made us some dessert" yoongi said, "what'd you make?" namjoon asked, "i made brownies" yoongi smiled, namjoon gasped, "i love brownies!"

—

"jiminie, i really want hyejin to have a sibling" seokjin frowned as they watched a movie on the couch with popcorn, "she's not even a month old yet" jimin said, checking the baby monitor, "so?" seokjin scoffed and rolled his eyes.

jimin sighed, "it's going to be hard for us if we have two babies around the same age. let's wait a bit, okay?" the youngest said, seokjin frowned.

"i'm really scared she's going to be lonely" he sniffled, leaning onto jimin's side, "she's not going to be alone, she has us"

"my mom and dad were always at work and it was mostly just me and my nanny. when i got old enough, it was just me" he sadly mumbled, jimin pressed a kiss on the boy's forehead.

"she won't be alone. i promise you" the smallest said, "let's have five more kids" seokjin smiled widely.

"have you gone crazy?" jimin screeched.

—

stay safe and healthy! drink water and eat some food! sorry for any mistakes, i love you all! qotd: what do you think of hyejin?? do you think yoongi is doing a good job supporting namjoon??