Kasity :

Victoria Rivera.
I can't believe it...

"Are you kidding me?" I say in disbelief...

Alastair gave me a questionable look...

"Alastair I know her." I say...

"You know Victoria?" he asks me, slightly surprised.

"Victoria Rivera is Sebastian's ally, the one we were forced to make a deal with when Sebastian sent us in London." I explain, still not being able to believe it was her...

"I know Sebastian, you saw him a couple of days ago here, he once mentioned her name, I told him I don't really care...So I guess it's the same answer for you now, I don't care." he replies and it was obvious that he meant everything he said...

"Well I do care, since she once sent Areson to the hospital for almost months." I oppose him...

"Now that I found out about this, I'm disappointed in her, I expected her to kill him. Well, none of my business though, I don't want to see her or Areson anymore, because if I do, one of them, if not both, is going to end up..." he says with an arrogant tone on his voice and stops...

"...dead." he finishes his sentence emphasising the word to make things clear...

"You didn't mention me Alastair." I tease him as I approach him...

"Because maybe I'd like to see you again, not only once." he lowers his voice as his face approaches mine...

•It's at stake again, it's dangerous again
So bad why, we are, yeah
To withstand it more, to sustain it more
So hard hard, it can't•

"But not now, this will mess things up more." he continues...

I take a step back, and we head towards my room...

"Don't worry, you're not the only one who doesn't want to see them two again. But maybe I can make an exception and talk to Areson." I say as we reach the door.

"Goodnight, and try not to dream of me." he teases...

My nerves.

"I've had enough of you these days, I don't want you even in my sleep..." I say, almost angrily...

"Enough but still not all of me." he provokes once again, turns around and starts walking...

"I don't consider turning your back at me a smart move Alastair, especially in case I had a gun here." I say...

Areson :

This number. Not again...

I pick up my phone...

"What do you want?" I ask, almost angrily...

"Relax sweetheart. I have a problem, I need help." Victoria answers on the phone...

"You need help? From me?" I laugh...

"I told you I was going to be your worst nightmare Areson, it's a miracle that I haven't killed you yet." she continues...

•Even if I knew already
I can't stop
No way no way no way falling
As time passes
It just becomes more ruined
No way no way it's collapsing again•

"I have to discuss something with you, I'm coming at the Suarez mansion, I know where to find you." she announces...

I clench my jaw...

Not her messing once again with my life.

"Oh yes, I remember we also left some unfinished business that night at the restaurant in London, after Damassiel left." I provoke...

"Shut up." she says and then hangs up...

I laugh in disappointment... She's so annoying...

*Flashback, London, the night at the restaurant*

Areson :

"So Areson, what's a man with such a great reputation doing with a low class lawyer like Damassiel" Victoria asked, totally ignoring Kasity's presence.

"First of all, Ms. Rivera, we're not together and secondly, you have no right to offend her like that" I angrily replied...

Kasity got up and took her bag.

"Victoria darling, you're pathetic" she finally says, with a disappointing look on her face.

"Areson c'mon we're leaving" she tells me.

"Oh, actually if you're tired you can go without me, I can't leave Rivera alone." I answer and at that moment she got furious.

"Goodnight." she said and left the restaurant angrily.

"Well I'm sorry." Victoria says as she takes a sip of her wine...

"Sure you are." I ironically say...

We stayed silent for a moment until I decided to talk about something she wasn't really going to like...

"So, how are you, where have you been all this time?" I ask her calmly...

"Well, after you left me, I entered a psycho mode and did terrible things you don't want to know..." She answers and takes another sip of her wine...

I smile in disappointment...

"As if you weren't a psycho before I left you." I contradict her and she gives me an annoyed look...

"And I met Sebastian, who kind of tried to control me, despite the fact that he was like that himself, you know him..." She continues, looking in my eyes...

"Oh, so you trapped him into your net too? I never thought I'd say this but, poor Sebastian." I say as I look away, taking a deep breath...

"I was never sexually involved with Sebastian, as I said he is just a friend, in fact my best one and that's not going to change." she answers...

"And what did you say? My web?" she says with fiery eyes...

"Come on Victoria darling, we know that you did what you did not just for love...You had your own purposes and benefits..." I reveal...

"Should I remind you your manipulation, your mind games, your toxic love Areson?" She asks, emphasising each word which hit me like a knife...

"I had everything Areson, I had Alastair, but I was greedy for more and that's why I helped you with your company, only to realise that Alastair was right about the Castellos back then. My mistake." she confesses and looks away...

I take a deep breath...

"Should we get up and, I don't know, take a walk?" I suggest...

She gets up and we leave the restaurant...

•A house made of cards, and us, inside
Even though the end is visible
Even if it's going to collapse soon
A house made of cards, we're like idiots
Even if it's a vain dream, stay like this a little more•

We walked in silence, until I decided to ask her...

"So you never really loved me?" I ask...

She takes a deep breath...

"Areson, I loved you at first, but then your behaviour made me hate you...And I couldn't get over the fact that I loved you when your attitude was constantly hurting me emotionally...Do you have any idea how that feels? Do you have any idea how loving someone so much but then they turn your back at you feels?" she says... And she said it all. As much as I wanted to deny it, she revealed all the truth in front of me...

•As if there's no such thing as tomorrow
As if there's no such thing as a "next time"
Right now, in front of my eyes, everything without you
Is a terribly pitch-black darkness•

"Listen I..." I start talking but then she interrupts me...

"I know Areson, you weren't yourself, you were under influences and I can notice how much you've changed over these few years..." She says...

"But you should know that you lost me forever..." She says as we stop walking and she stands in front of me...

"I loved you." I confess...The truth is I really loved her, but it turned out destructive...

We stood there in silence until she approached me more...

I felt unbelievably weak at that moment, I felt the darkness hit me, as I watched her in front of me, the one I destroyed, took away from the normal love...The one in whom I induced toxicity, the one that I loved, the one that I ruined...

She noticed that I was lost at that moment and reluctlantly put her hands around my neck...

"Look at me Areson." she said and I looked in her eyes as they teared up...

"Areson we did what we did, we're both ruined by this..." she says calmly...

"It happened. There's no turning back..." She continues, hurting me with those words...

•I say it like a habit
We won't work in the end
Even so, I keep hoping
As long as I'm with you in the end as well, I'm okay•

"But please...I saw her...I saw the fire in her eyes, I saw her potential... I'd say I don't care, but please, don't ruin her too...She's amazing in what she does...And I can see that on you...You've changed so much for the better because of her...And this is good...But this is taking away her life...Fixing you is ruining her, Areson. If you love her, protect her by slowly letting her go..." She says, as my eyes teared up at her words...

"Do you know how much I deeply want to get back to you?" She asks...

"But I won't...Because It's going to be a destruction I can't handle..." She continues...

•Even if I knew already
I can't stop
No way no way no way
As time passes
It just becomes more ruined
No way no way it's collapsing again•

"Life is too short...We did what we did and we're ruined, but let her live." she says as her hands caress my neck slightly, moved to my shoulders slowly and let go of me...

•A house made of cards, and us, inside
Even though the end is visible
Even if it's going to collapse soon
A house made of cards, we're like idiots
Even if it's a vain dream•

"Goodnight Areson, I'm still your enemy, because if we become allies, I won't be able to handle it..." She says...

"You should be really careful, because now I work with Sebastian, my best friend...I am really dangerous to you, so be careful. I can kill you with no regrets." She finishes her talk, turns around and leaves...

•Slow down the time
Please stay for a little more
Please Baby Calm down
Just a little more•

I stood there in silence, not being able to control my emotions.

•More precarious more dangerous
We are so bad so bad yeah
To endure to support more
So hard as it falls again•

Because once you care, you're f*cked.

*End of flashback*

Kasity :

Next morning...

"Wake up Ms.Damassiel, we're leaving." Alastair knocks on the door...

I had already gotten ready when I opened the door.

"You're fast." he smiles...

"You have a call from Vanessa, I think, I don't know why she didn't call you instead, but anyway feel free to call her back." he says...

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Soundtrack : House of cards by BTS

Lyrics translated to English by :

https://genius.com/Genius-english-translations-bts-house-of-cards-full-length-edition-english-translation-lyrics

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Author's note :

'Wow, I have no idea how I wrote this without totally falling apart.'

One of the most emotionally intense parts of the story.

This is about deep love which ends up being toxic. Two people, the right people at the wrong time. It can be extremely destructive. Unfortunately it happens. It happens often. It's consuming love, which causes irreparable damage. It can be forgotten, but it can't be healed.

"As long as I'm with you in the end as well, I'm okay." It refers at the fact that you feel okay, you feel fine when you're close to that person, but you realise how bad they were for you only when you are no longer there. Because when you're no longer there, you feel like suffocating, like you can't find meaning in anything... But you can't go back, can you?

Knowing what will happen, you can't go back. Because It's going to be the same thing from the beginning, you fall in love again, you can't support it and that's why it falls apart, you part from each other, feel the darkness,  and then... Then you go back. Trying to build the house of cards which is always going to fall. It fell once, it's going to fall every time.

But you can't help it. You can't stay away of that person. Because you can't get over the happy person you were near them. Or at least that's what it seemed like...
Maybe you liked yourself more when you were close to that person, but you can't be that someone, because it requires the act of going back. So, from now on, you try to create that someone you were, with the help of people who don't hurt you.
And that self is going to be better.

52 cards...There are 52 cards, this is chapter 51...The card that's missing is making the house of cards fall over and over again... Is it honesty? Is it love? Compassion? Affection? Understanding? Care? Passion?
The card that's missing is the key...
(skinylandia, thank you♡)

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Enjoy!