-

Meeting Yunjin was purely by chance, on an afternoon where rain was imminent. A stormy gray sky above that threatened to open at any moment.

You were antsy, warily glancing up every few steps. Know that your important documents were being sheltered in the thin weathered backpack that you've owned for years, one that surely wouldn't withstand more than a couple drops of water. Yunjin - who was walking the next street over - wasn't worried at all, opting to keep her chin tilted to the sky. Eunchae's word nothing more than a faint droning in her ears.

"You're not even listening to me." Indignant whining pulled Yunjin from her thoughts, finally making her turn her attention towards the younger girl, who was now pouting angrily. "What could possibly be more important than our fanmeet?" Shrugging her shoulders Yunjin sent back an apologetic smile, before turning her face once more to the sky.

"It's gonna rain." This statement caused Eunchae to rant about the importance of their fans, a rant that Yunjin had heard so many times that she no longer bothered by it. She couldn't explain the feeling she had, like something was going to happen. "Eunchae I'm sorry, but can't you feel it?" A weird look was all she got in return.

"Unnie, are you alright? We can head back to the dorms if you'd like, Chaewon unnie wouldn't make you practice if you aren't well." Sighing, Yunjin reluctantly shook her head before stopping.

"It's not that. It feels like something's going to happen. You're telling me you don't feel it at all?"

"You're acting weird. I'm going to the studio, I'll just tell Sakura unnie you're not feeling well." With a wave Eunchae turned on her heel, hurrying down the street to not be late, leaving Yunjin standing in the middle of the sidewalk. Yunjin couldn't shake this feeling. Maybe she should head back to the dorm?

Glancing at the sky a drop of rain hit her cheek, causing her to blink incredulously. Perfect.

Around the corner you held out your hand, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth, watching as another drop of rain hit your palm. Fuck.

On cue with your revelation the sky opened above, soft drops of rain becoming a torrent in a matter of minutes. Breaking into a sprint you prayed that your papers would be safe. You were so close to your apartment, relief flooding you as your street's sign.

Short lived relief as you turned the corner and ran into somebody. Reflexively your eyes shut, waiting to make contact with the hard concrete. Shocked was an understatement when you felt yourself make contact with someone's chest, an arm wrapped around your waist keeping you pressed firmly against them. Slowly opening your eyes you were met with the sight of soaked hair and warm brown eyes, accompanied by the sweetest smile you'd ever seen. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, thank you." Her charming smile only grew at your response, and you felt captivated. The feeling was mutual as she looked down at you, the street light doing little to mask your beauty, and she felt himself pulling you imperceptibly closer. That broke you from her spell, realizing that both of you were standing in the middle of a storm. Grabbing her arm you pulled her into your building's lobby.

It wasn't until you reached your apartment that you realized you'd practically kidnapped this stranger, who in her defense was just along for the ride. Turning around on your heels, you started sputtering out an excuse, a bunch of 'i'm sorrys' and 'didn't mean to just kidnap you'. "I don't even know your name and I've practically snatched you from the street."

"Yunjin."

"Excuse me." That same charming smile came back and you felt heat rise to your cheeks.

"My name is Yunjin."

A chance encounter that led to love at first sight. At least, on Yunjin's behalf.

That was over a year ago and now you were inseparable. 

Yunjin doesn't know how she survived without you in her life. You've become a crucial part in her life, intertwined so tightly it's like you've always been there. The tiger stuffed animal resting at the head of her bed, one of many birthday gifts you've given her, your hoodies hanging in her closet, pictures from your first time visiting the photo booth stuck to her mirror while a drawing is taped to her walls. Every part of her has been touched by you, and her room is only a mirror of that.

Yunjin can only hope it's the same as you, that the hoodies she's snuck into your closet remind you of her whenever she's busy. Hope that you smile everytime you look at the purple bunny placed carefully on your dresser, remembering just how hard she worked to win it for you. Only hope that she affects you the same way.

Hope that you love her  the same way she loves you.

Even now, she should be thinking about the cake you're getting ready to bake, but all she can do is watch in awe as you walk around the kitchen, humming a song - Good Parts, your favorite song from her group - gathering the ingredients and placing them on the island. Mesmerized as you brush stray hair off of your forehead, a focused look on your face as your eyebrows furrowed, counting all of the ingredients and fidgeting with your necklace. A lock necklace, matching the key chain that Yunjin had tucked underneath of her shirt.

"I think that's everything? Are you ready?" Pushing herself away from the counter, Yunjin walked closer, looking over the ingredients. "I'm so happy I finally convinced you to bake with me."

Wonder if you knew how dangerous your smile was, especially aimed at Yunjin like that.

"Yea, yea. I'm gonna be the one baking anyway. Last time you tried, you set the fire alarm off at 1 am." Truthfully, Yunjin liked you begging for her attention, it made her feel wanted. Made her feel like you might return her feelings. A pout formed on your lips as you grabbed the flour, carefully measuring it.

"Not like you're any better. You forgot the water in your microwavable noodles." Yunjin's face heated, before she mumbled something along the lines of 'it was an accident'. 

Both of you worked in relative silence, despite Yunjin's hassling you worked in perfect unison, handing Yunjin the eggs to crack into the dry ingredients, overcompensating for the extreme amount of vanilla that Yunjin added, handing the mixing bowl to Yunjin after the batter became too thick for you to continue mixing easily. It took two pans and a lot of paper towels before both of your cakes were safely in the oven, settled on the middle rack. It took thirty minutes for the cakes to finish baking, cracked only a little on the top, placed on top of the oven to cool enough for you to decorate them.

It took only thirty seconds for Yunjin to think of something to do while you waited, and another five for Yunjin to reach into the bag of flour before grabbing your face, leaving two almost perfect hand prints on each cheek. Giggling, Yunjin backed up, a cheeky smile on her face as she admired her work. Grabbing some flour, you threw it at Yunjin, laughing as it settled on her hair, making her look as if snow had been sprinkled on her. Both of you couldn't help but continue to toss flour at each other, under the guise of defending yourself, the sounds of your laughter filling the kitchen while your hair and clothes became coated with flour.

"Let's call a truce." Raising both hands, you looked around the kitchen. The floor was absolutely covered with flour, along with the kitchen island that you'd been using as a shield. "We need to clean up before we ice the cakes."

"Truce." Cleaning turned out to be futile, the icing ended up everywhere as a result of you mindlessly placing your spatula on the counter instead of the cutting board, or touching the other ingredients without realizing that the sticky purple icing was covering your hands. Yunjin was no help either, continuously eating the icing in between coating the top of her cake with sprinkles and candies, causing her lips and somehow also her cheek to be covered with light yellow.

"How are you such a messy eater? You have icing everywhere." Wetting a paper towel you grabbed Yunjin's chin, turning her face down towards you.

"Why should I be neat? I know you'll always clean it up for me." Rolling your eyes, you chose to ignore her taunting, opting to wipe her cheeks. Once you were positive the icing was gone off of both cheeks, you turned her head back, carefully wiping the dark purple icing from around her lips, absentmindedly brushing your thumb over her bottom lip. Glancing up at her, you saw her eyes were wide and a blush was spreading over her cheeks. Realizing just how close you were, you glanced down, realizing that you were still holding her chin, keeping her in place and keeping her lips only a few inches away from yours.

You wouldn't even have to properly lean forward, Yunjin would just have to lean down. Which is exactly what she did, placing her hand on the back of your neck and pulling you towards her.

You were never one for cliches, but that's the only way to describe how you felt. Eyes fluttering shut when your lips pressed together, grabbing her hoodie and keeping him pressed against you. Everything about this kiss felt right, the way your lips fit together perfectly as if you were molded just to be Yunjin's other half, the way she kissed you the exact same way she treated you, gently as her hand moved to cup your jaw, keeping you in place, but with a determination behind it as she licked over your bottom lip, and you separated them happily. Once the need for air became too hard to ignore you pulled with a sigh.

Opening your eyes you were met with the Yunjin's shocked expression, releasing you as if you burned her, putting space between the both of you. The pout that formed on your lips as Yunjin pulled away tempted her to apologize, mutter endless sorry's before pulling you back towards her and kissing it away, but that's what got her into this mess. Kissing you.

"I gotta go." Rushing out of the kitchen, Yunjin grabbed her shoes and slipped out of your apartment. Leaving you rooted to your spot, flour and icing covering your kitchen counter, two half decorated cakes sitting on the counter, along with the ray of sprinkles and candies. Filled with emotions that you can't comprehend except for two.

Confusion and heartbreak.

-

Four weeks passed and you've yet to hear from Yunjin. The first few days you waited for her  to text you, keeping your phone close and reacting quickly every time your phone pinged. That hope you felt at every notification, praying that it was Yunjin, died down as days bled into weeks. It hit you, somewhere along the second week that Yunjin wasn't going to contact you. This realization caused your already frayed emotions to go haywire, causing you to climb into your bed, wrap your coziest blanket around yourself and cry, trying to ignore the way your heart clenched painfully everytime you thought about Yunjin.

Kazuha was the one who realized something happened - seeing Yunjin's red rimmed eyes at practice she easily put two and two together - and spontaneously popped up at your apartment with Eunchae, who held a tub of your favorite icecream - Yunjin had told them specifically which one to buy - along with takeout. Every day Kazuha came back, accompanied by Eunchae or Chaewon, sitting in your desk chair for hours, listening patiently as you vented. Kazuha was truly the one who helped you realize your feelings.

"I think I like her? When she kissed me it felt like everything fell into place," falling back against the bed with a sigh you held the stuffed bunny closer to your chest, feeling melancholy at your nth venting session this week. "Every time I think of her my chest hurts, and my stomach makes me feel as if I'm going to vomit. It hurts so badly, and I just wish I knew for sure."

Running her fingers through her hair, Eunchae shared a look with Kazuha, one that you were oblivious to. Downturned eyebrows as they talk without using words. Kazuha was the one who opened her mouth, "You're in love with Yunjin, you have been for months. You're heartbroken because you love her."

"I love her?" Those three words had a lightbulb going off, along with glancing over at  Kazuha and seeing the expression on her face, one full of pity that you knew she was serious. "Oh my god, I love Yunjin."

Your admittance had you sitting up in your bed, plushie falling to the floor. It explained so much. How you couldn't help but steal glances whenever you were alone, all of the candid photos that you took under the guise of taking them for fans, looking at them long after Yunjin had left your side. How your heart continuously skipped whenever she grabbed your hand or cuddled up close to you, staring at you with her sweet smile. Everytime you fight the temptation to lean in, opting to ruffle her hair or tease her to get her to stop looking at you. Scared that she'd notice how you'd stared at her as if she hung the moon and the stars. Scared that she'd see just how deep your emotions ran.

That she'd realize you loved her and leave. Exactly like she'd done.

-

Yunjin regrets what she did, her stupid fucking decisions ruined your friendship. She knows she can't take back the kiss - there's no in hell he would either, it was a dream come true - but she wishes she could take back her reaction. The confusion on your face that melted into a pout when she turned to run from the kitchen haunts her. She wishes she would've just pulled you into her arms, kissed the pout right off of your lips and confessed. Admit that she's been in love with you, but she panicked. Resulting in her making the worst possible decision, and now? She's scared. How she could resist you, especially when you were so close, looking at her as if you wanted her to. 

Pressing her face further into the pillow Yunjin wondered what would happen if you truly just left her, curling into herself further at that thought. Sakura and Chaewon were merely there, Chaewon sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing Yunjin's back, while Sakura continued to dispute all your negative claims and offer advice.

That she refused to take.

"You need to just talk to her. Don't you want to apologize at least?" Solid piece of advice that Yunjin had already attempted. No text she wrote sounded good enough.

"I've tried, but they deserve better than a simple text." Shaking her head, Yunjin fought the urge to scream. Her members meant well, but all of their advice were basic things she'd already thought of. 

Text her as if nothing happened? That just makes her look like a jerk that doesn't care. Apologize? No text apology is good enough for what she did, and it looks like she made no effort to contact you after running out. "I ruined our friendship and then ghosted her for a month. How could I possibly even start to apologize for that?"

"How'd you ruin your friendship? Are we missing something?" With a deep groan Yunjin looked up from her pillow, staring at her headboard, catching a glimpse of her chain wrapped around the corner, the key hanging mockingly knowing that you have the matching lock.

"I kissed her. I forced her to kiss me." Covering her face, Yunjin swallowed the lump in her throat that was progressively growing the longer she thought about it. Another exasperated look shared between the two. 

They've heard enough about this, Yunjin holding your neck and jaw, 'forcing' you to kiss her. Chaewon decided to chime in, hoping she could finally get through as the voice of reason.

"I've met her only a couple times, but isn't she the one with great boundaries? Like, refusing to hug you if she doesn't want to, and only cuddling up to you when she feels like it. And you allow her to do this. Why?"

"I care about her, why wouldn't I? I don't ever want to disrespect her."

"Why would she allow you to kiss her?" Chaewon watched as the realization finally hit Yunjin who turned around, staring at them shocked. Why would you let her? She'd never gotten away with pushing your boundaries, even when you were mere strangers. 

You wanted to kiss her? 

Thinking back to that day Yunjin recognizes you weren't confused because of the kiss, you were confused she backed away from you. When her eyes first opened you were smiling, lips upturned at the corner before your eyes opened, crinkling at the corner to match.

"She wanted to kiss me." She took no time to process her member's expressions, both filled with gratitude at her getting it, and frustration due to the long process. "I gotta go." Standing up, Yunjin rushed out of his room. Both listened as the dorm door shut shortly afterwards.

"We should be getting paid for this."

-

While Yunjin ran to your apartment, in too much of a rush to wait for a manager or Uber to drive her, Kazuha comforted you. Holding you as you cried and spoke your fears of Yunjin leaving because she realized you love her, that you lost your best-friend due to one simple mistake.

If Kazuha didn't know Yunjin was already suffering and more concerned with comforting you she would've left your apartment, giving Yunjin a piece of her mind before dragging her back, forcing her to apologize. Yunjin was her groupmate, and she loved him like a sister, but you didn't deserve this. 

In the middle of your venting the doorbell rang. Wiping your face Kazuha left, prepared to brush off whoever was there. Her shock when Yunjin was the one standing there was astounding.

"What are you doing here?" Yunjin beat Kazuha to the punch. Walking into the hallway Kazuha flicked Yunjin, unable to control herself and feeling satisfied when the older grabbed her forehead.

"Exactly what I wanna ask you. Whatever you're doing, you need to know that you hurt her. Badly. I'm here having to act as a makeshift best-friend because you disappeared on her. You need to make this better." Yunjin at least had the nerve to look guilty, being scolded by Kazuha was something that she hadn't expected, but she deserved it.

"That's what I'm here for. Can I talk to them?" Sighing Kazuha opened the door, waving her in. Before Yunjin walked inside Kazuha grabbed her shoulder, squeezing it uncomfortably tight.

"Make it better." A simple nod and Kazuha was releasing her, letting her go, watching as she rushed into your apartment. Yunjin felt jealousy bubble inside her hearing you call out Kazuha's name but once you turned the corner she felt like he was punched in the gut. Tears stained your cheeks, eyes red and puffy as you turned to look at her. Eyes that went wide at the sight of her, lower lip beginning to wobble. Rushing over to you, Yunjin cupped your cheeks, wiping your tears away and muttering apologies.

"I'm sorry, I can't say it enough. I didn't mean to leave you, I panicked. I should've just told you that I love you cause I do, I think I've been in love with you since I met you. I was scared that I ruined our friendship, and overstepped your boundaries that I ran. Fear kept me away from you, and no apology that I tried to write was good enough for you. I'm in love with you, and I don't know what I would do if you weren't in my life." Fresh tears running down your cheeks silenced her, her blood running cold at the thought of you rejecting her, especially now that her heart is on the line.

"Shut up." Yunjin's eyes widened as you wrapped your arms around her neck, pulling her down enough so that you could easily kiss her. 

If the first kiss felt cliche, this one felt like coming home after a long day of work, comforting in the best way as her arms dropped to your waist, holding you close. 

It only lasted a few seconds, but it was enough as both of you pulled away, love sick smiles on your face as you grabbed her arm, pulling her towards the living room and collapsing on the couch, curling yourself up on top of her, laying your head on her chest.

Looking up towards her you pressed one last kiss to her lips, muttering "I love you too" against her lips.

Maybe loving was easier than breathing. Something that helped you wake up in the morning before a busy day, continuously giving her a reason to fight, dance harder and perform a little better. It was encouraging texts when you were too busy to see each other, the code to your apartment that she had memorized, sliding into your bed after a long day and being able to wrap an arm around your waist, pulling you close to her.

It was the same thing that made her stop and smile whenever she looked at you, eyes revealing the love she held for you. What made it hard for her to fight the urge, leaning in and pressing a kiss to your cheek while you continued to happily point at the animals at the zoo, ignoring the sound of cameras flashing and the lecture she was sure to get when articles were released about the public display of affection.

It was worth it though, as long as she was allowed to love you.