39. Loose Cannon

Sam and I were the ones to investigate the basement. We nearly tripped each other going down.

We didn't find anything to suggest someone had gotten hurt, but the scream I remembered told me otherwise. We found the panic room door wide open. In mutual silence, Sam and I agreed that he'd check the room whereas I'd check the basement. I didn't know what I was looking for, really, I just wanted to contribute in some way other than freaking out.

"Damn it!" I heard Sam bellow inside the panic room.

"What?" My voice couldn't conceal its panic.

Sam came back out of the room, shutting the door. "Dean sent Cas away with a banishing sigil. It's drawn on one of the cabinets. Did you find him?"

I shook my head. "I don't understand it, Sam. What's going on?"

The realization was evident in his face. Hazel eyes met gray. "He's giving himself up."

My lower lip trembled. "W-what? You don't mean..."

He nodded feverishly. He barreled past me, with me trailing up the steps behind him. My mind was in a whirl. What is Dean thinking?! Saying yes to Michael? Here I thought he wasn't going to! He'd made that very clear to Zachariah all those months ago!

I felt slightly lightheaded once we breached back to the main floor. If Dean is the first to say yes, how long will it be before it's Sam's turn? I tried to swallow down the bile rising in my throat. That wasn't going to happen. Sam wasn't going to let Lucifer wear him. But that's exactly how Dean felt, and look what's going on now. But the circumstances were different for Dean. Sam was Lucifer's only vessel. I guess with Adam being Michael's alternative, Dean didn't want that for him. Son of a bitch. He knows what'll happen if he lets it happen!

"Where's Cas?" Bobby asked the moment we got into the study.

"Blown to Oz," Sam panted. "Look, I'll get Dean. He couldn't have gotten far. Just watch Adam."

"How? You may have noticed, he's got a slight height advantage."

"Then cuff him to your chair. I don't know. Just watch him. Kota, you coming?"

I looked from Sam to Bobby. Both of them needed my help. Bobby wasn't exactly fit to watch Adam. But Sam could use the extra hand in finding Dean. Either way, I wasn't going to be happy with what I chose.

In the end, I went into the night with Sam. We found the Impala still in the junkyard, which was surprising. Guess he didn't want to be heard. He must've went on foot, then. Sam and I looked down for footprints. I tried to figure out how much ground Dean could have put between himself and us. He had to be long gone by now, and we had no idea where the hell he could have gone.

Sam and I didn't call out his brother's name, it was pointless to. He wouldn't come running to us, it'd only make him know that we were close. We didn't split up. I shook my head in dismay. Dean was seriously going to get his ass chewed out for this when we found him. Hopefully it's still him that we find and not Michael.

"Is your brother a fast runner?" I asked Sam as we followed the prints. We'd picked up some recently. "Because if he is, there's no way we can possibly catch him unless we take the car. We don't even know where he's gone."

"Let's think about it, Kota." Sam kept looking around. "He's probably run off somewhere we can't track him."

"So you're saying he's a lost cause?" I stopped in my tracks, looking at him with wide eyes.

"I'm not saying that. If Dean's gone and left us no directions, our only hope at this point is Cas."

"How long does it take to recover from being banished?"

"I'm not an angel, I couldn't tell you."

"So does that mean we should just head back in and guard Adam?" I looked back to the house, arms folded over my chest.

"Seems like the only option we have."

"But what if Cas doesn't find him, Sam? You forget we're hidden from angels?" I paled. "We're so screwed, aren't we? Dean's gonna get his way, and so is Michael." I ran a hand through my hair nervously. "This is just the start of it. First Dean, and then you'll follow suit. The world as we know it will cease to exist—"

"Whoa, hey, hey, Kota." Sam stopped my babbling by grabbing my arms. "You can't think like that right now, okay? We're gonna beat this, you told me that a while back."

"I'm not so sure about that now," I murmured. "I mean, say Dean does get his way, as does Michael. Who's to say you'll fight your calling for the rest of your life? You'll have a butt load of people coming after you to make you give Lucifer consent!"

"It wouldn't be different than what's going on now."

I felt the tears gather. "Maybe it's inevitable, Sam." I looked at him with sad, gray eyes. "Maybe it's destiny." I shrugged.

"Listen to me." He grabbed my head firmly in his hands, making me focus solely on him. "Nothing on this earth is going to make me give in, you hear me? Lucifer can do whatever the hell he wants, I won't budge."

"But what if he hits you in a sore sport, Sam? Like with me. Cas said I'm in his weapons arsenal. You really think you won't budge if he uses me against you?" I searched his eyes. "I'm just afraid of what'll happen if the world loses you Winchesters. All the hunters and angels who are anti-apocalypse together probably wouldn't stand a chance to save the world. I...I don't know if I can stick around for that."

"You're having second thoughts."

I nodded, biting down on my lower lip. "I don't want to, Sam, I really don't. It's just...what you guys are in...what we're in...it's way bigger than I thought it was. I'm beginning to understand the stakes here." I sniffed. "I'm not sure if I want to be around to see the gory end."

"But there won't be one," Sam insisted. "There won't be, I promise. You have to trust me on this. We pull a miracle out of our ass when we need it. You just have to trust me on it, Kota. We're in this together, we have been for months. We've got to see it through to the end, okay?" He wiped a stray tear off my face. "You just have to hang in here for a little while longer."

I nodded. "O-okay." I sniffed. "But if this goes south, I may just hightail it out of here."

"Let's hope we never have to cross that bridge." He kissed me softly on the mouth.

After that conversation that distracted us from our main purpose, we headed back inside the house. I was the first one into the study. I cursed under my breath to see Bobby, no Adam. At least Bobby wasn't hurt.

"What the hell?" I looked around.

"Adam flew the coop," Bobby said curtly.

"What do you mean?" My voice rose an octave.

"Should I say it in Spanish?"

"He's gone how?" Sam jumped in. "What the hell, Bobby?!"

"Watch your tone, the both of you. He was right in front of me, and he disappeared into thin air."

"Because angels took him," said a new, gruff voice.

I took a step back as Cas appeared into the study, carrying a very bloody and battered Dean Winchester. He looked to be out cold. I let out a quiet breath of relief. Okay, that crisis is adverted. Maybe Sam's right; this won't end badly. But there was still a lot of time to change that.

"What the hell happened to him?" Sam asked. I guessed he was indicating Dean.

"Me."

I blew a low whistle through my teeth. Mental note to self: do not do something to provoke Cas. He may not let me live. He sure did a hell of a number on Dean. Hopefully it made him think twice about running off to say yes to Michael.

"What do you mean, the angels took Adam?" Bobby demanded. "You branded his ribs, didn't you?"

"Yes. Adam must've tipped them."

"How?"

"I don't know. Maybe in a dream."

"Well, where would they have taken him?"

"I'll look into it," Cas offered. "Take him and make sure he doesn't do this again."

Sam took his brother off of Cas's hands, and Cas disappeared to go search for Adam. I followed Sam downstairs and pried the panic room door open for him. Sam lumbered Dean over to the only cot that I could see in the room. I looked around, thinking back to when Sam had detoxed here not too long ago.

"Kota, hand me those cuffs, will you?" Sam grunted as he got Dean onto the cot.

I searched until I found what he asked for. I looked at Sam suspiciously as I held the handcuffs. "How many sets do you have lying around?" I asked.

"Enough. Helps make our aliases look convincing."

"Ah, I see. So you're the kinky type, huh?"

Sam looked at me oddly.

I shrugged. I handed him the cuffs, and he chained Dean to the cot. "If not you, is Dean?"

"Kota, are you seriously talking about this right now?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I suck at lightening the mood," I grumbled. "Sorry, I'm not a professional." I looked at Dean's form. "You think he'll wake up soon?"

"Maybe. I'm gonna head back upstairs for a few minutes, see if Cas came back with anything. Don't let him try anything if he's awake before I come back. I won't be long." He pecked my lips before leaving me alone with Dean.

I sighed, plopping a seat next to the cot. He needs to be cleaned up, at least. I wonder...

I got back on my feet and searched for some supplies. I managed to find a cloth and went back to Dean, wiping his face. At first, I thought he was still out cold, but he eventually stirred.

I smiled bitterly at him. "You're one stupid guy, you know that?"

"What are you doing?"

"Cleaning you up since you need it." I rubbed a bit harder on a stubborn blood spot. "Cas really beat the hell out of you, huh? I'm not surprised. When you try to run off and do something reckless, that's just asking for trouble."

"Since when did you become Jiminy Cricket?"

"I didn't, I'm just speaking my mind. How're you feeling?"

"Word to the wise: don't piss off the nerd angels."

"I already made a note." He flinched. "My bad."

"So how's it going?"

"Adam's gone," I reported somberly. "The angels have him."

"Where?"

"The room where they took you," came Sam's voice. I heard his footsteps enter the panic room.

"You sure?"

"Cas did a recon."

"And?"

"And the place is crawling with mooks. Pretty much a no-shot-in-Hell, hail-Mary kind of thing."

"Ah, so the usual. What are you going to do?"

"For starters...I'm bringing you with."

"Excuse me?" Dean and I asked together.

I scooted over as Sam went to unlock Dean's handcuffs. I looked at Sam questioningly.

"There are too many of them," he explained. "We can't do it alone. And uh, you're pretty much the only game in town."

"Isn't that a bad idea?" I voiced.

"Cas and Bobby think so. I'm not so sure."

"Well, they're right," Dean agreed. "Because it's either a trap to get me there to make me say yes, or it's not a trap and I'm gonna say yes anyway. And I will. I'll do it. Fair warning."

"No, you won't. When push shoves, you'll make the right call."

I gave Sam a confused look. "You sure about that?"

"Kota, if you'd been through what we have, you'd agree with me."

"You know," Dean said, "if tables were turned...I'd let you rot in here. Hell, I have let you rot in here."

"Yeah, well...I guess I'm not that smart."

"I—I don't get it. Sam, why are you doing this?"

"Because...you're still my big brother."

"Hey, not to be the one who breaks up this touching brotherly-love moment, but time is wasting," I butted in firmly. "We've got to get your brother away from that asshole Zachariah."

"If by 'we,' you mean Dean and me, sure. Don't question it, Kota. You nearly died the first time you got pulled into this mess. I'm not letting you nearly die again. I'd rather you sit this out."

"You both promise me you'll come back in one piece?"

Dean barely laughed. "Dak, with us, we can't make any solid promises. But Sam's right, you need to plant your ass here until we get back. Just take a load off and study up, okay?"

"Fine." I scratched my neck. "Well, if you guys have any shot of reaching Adam soon, you better leave now."

"You go get things ready, I'm gonna hang back here for a second," Sam told Dean. Dean didn't question him, he left us in the panic room. I let out a shaky breath.

"You guys like to get thrown into danger, don't you?" I teased bitterly.

"It's an occupational hazard." He shrugged. "Listen, I know this is the worst timing imaginable, but—we might be gone a while. I don't want you sitting in the house worrying about us."

"I have research to do."

"Kota, you know what I mean."

I sighed through my nose. "I'm not sure I'm ready for that, Sam."

"You are. You need a break from the crazy. Find some help and be normal for a change."

I pursed my lips, taking his consideration into consideration. "Just"—I hugged him tight—"just call when it's over, okay, so I know? I don't want to not hear anything and get worried."

"I will. You'll hear from us, I promise." He brushed through my hair softly. "Please go, for me. For all of us."

After one goodbye kiss, I was left to my thoughts in the panic room, already worrying about the Winchesters.

**Guys, I think if Kota wasn't around the boys, she would have been long gone by now. Remember, she did this once before, before the trip to Carthage. She was convinced to hang around then, that whenever she freaked out, she did it to get it out of her system so that she could carry on.

If she didn't have anyone around, she would be back to hiding.**