Tw // there's very sensitive topics in this chapter. If you're sensitive skip it and message me, I can tell you what happens without details.
The next couple days were rough.
Grams wasn't doing very well which was stressing me out. I talked to my boss explaining that she was sick and that I wanted to be with her.
They luckily understood and let me have the week off so I could take time to be with her.
She wasn't able to stay in the nursing home anymore because she had gotten so sick that they couldn't take care of her there. She was in the hospital diagnosed with pneumonia.
"Hey, grams." I said and walked into the room with a bouquet of flowers. "Mmm." She mumbled as I walked over to the bed. "I brought you some flowers, I hope you like them." I said then sat down and took her hand.
It was so cold it sent a shiver down my spine. "Are you cold, grams?" I asked and rubbed her forearm gently with my other hand. "The chicken's in the fridge." She mumbled as I my heart sank.
"Shhh, get some rest. I'm just gonna sit here with you." I said quietly as she turned her head to look at me. "Oh Gracie, I wanted to give this to you." She said quietly then shakily brought her hand to her necklace.
"You want to give me your necklace?" I asked as she struggled to even grab the pendant. "I want it to be in good hands." She said as I held back tears. "You keep it, you're gonna live through this. Papa would have wanted you to have it." I said as a nurse came in.
"How's she doing?" He asked and came over to take her vitals. "I don't know." I whispered, feeling the world crumbling around me.
I couldn't lose her too.
"Why don't you go get some fresh air. I'll come get you in a minute." The nurse said as I nodded and stood up. I walked out of the room and burst into tears, feeling my heart breaking once again.
I walked to the little courtyard that was in the middle of the hospital. I just needed some fresh air, then I would be fine. I let myself cry for a minute before I looked up at the sky.
I took in the details of the fluffy white clouds as the nurse from before came out. "How are things looking?" I asked and fidgeted with my rings. "She's comfortable but I would prepare for the worst at this point." He said as my face scrunched up with pain.
"I know it's hard, especially when you're dealing with this alone, but I'm here for you. We all are." The nurse said and hugged me as I cried. "I just want her pain to go away. I hate seeing her struggle." I cried out as he scratched my back.
"I know, she's a tough one though." He said as I pulled away. "Do you mind if I stay the night here..I don't want to leave her." I said and sniffled. "Of course not. I'll bring you some blankets." He said as we made our way back to her room.
When I walked in I grabbed the knitting needles that were on the table next to her bed. "Do you want me to tell you stories?" I asked her quietly as she turned her head to look at me.
I wanted to cry at how weak she looked, but instead I just smiled and took her hand. "I'm gonna tell you the story about how I met the love of my life." I said quietly as she nodded.
I spent the next hour or so telling her all about Colby, telling her the story as if it was a fairytale. She watched me with a small smile on her face as I spoke. I made the ending happy for her though, because I didn't want to relive the heartbreak again.
"Beautiful." She whispered as I smiled at her. "I miss Dale." She mumbled as the nurse came in with her dinner. "He misses you too, grams. I know he does." I said then stood up so I could feed her.
It broke my heart watching her try to eat but having to stop every few seconds to cough. "You're doing good grams, I love you." I said then smoothed her hair from her forehead.
"How are you here? You were in the accident." She asked and brought her shaky hand up to point at me. "Huh?" I asked as she shook her head. "Get milk at the store." She whispered then closed her eyes.
"I love you, grams." I whispered then kissed her head before sitting down next to her again. I held her hand as she slept, hoping it would bring her some comfort.
I felt the hysterics start to rise as the anxiety caught up with me. I was trying to stay positive but I couldn't do this again. I couldn't lose another person in my life.
I ended sitting up with her for a really long time, in case she woke up. I didn't want her to be alone. I was on the verge of falling asleep though right when she started waking up.
"Hey grams. You okay?" I asked and stood up, brushing her face from her forehead. "I wanted you to have this." She mumbled and reached for her necklace again. "Your father gave it to me." She said as I sighed.
"Papa gave that to you grams, he wanted you to have it." I said and smiled softly at her. "I'll be with him soon." She said quietly as I shook my head. "No, you're gonna be okay grams. I promise you'll be okay." I said and started to cry as she pulled her hand away and shakily unclasped the necklace.
"I'll be with him soon." She repeated and laid the necklace in my palm. "No....grams please no." I whispered and leaned down, hugging her. "I love you." I said as her heart monitor slowed. "I love you too, sweetie." She said quietly then went limp in my arms.
"No!!!" I screamed and pulled away looking around the room. "Help! Please help me!" I screamed and brushed her hair back again as the door swung open.
"Oh god..." One of the nurses breathed out as I sobbed. "Please!" I screamed and sobbed hysterically. "Shhhh, it's okay.." The other nurse said and pulled me into her arms. "She's in a better place now, she's not hurting anymore." She said as the other nurse assessed her.
We had discussed a couple days ago that if she passed we wouldn't try to resuscitate. She had been through enough pain that it wouldn't be fair to keep her hanging on. It would be selfish.
I cried into the nurses shoulder for a while as the doctor came in to officially call it. I've known for a while that this was coming, but it didn't make any of this any easier.
After a while I finally calmed down enough to sign the paper work that I needed to. They got everything sorted out then sent me home, since now there was no reason to stay.
When I got in my car I broke down, sobbing and screaming, trying to release the pressure in my chest. I knew she was in a better place and I knew she wasn't in pain anymore but I was selfish.
I wasn't ready to let her go.
I pulled my phone out and started calling Ki, forgetting the fact that it was 2am in LA and she was probably asleep.
"Vi?" Ki answered groggily. "I'm s-sorry. Did I wake you?" I asked and looked down at the necklace that I was still holding tightly in my hand. "Yeah. It's okay though, are you crying? What's going on?" She asked with concern in her tone.
"My grandma..."I started but couldn't finish because of the sobs I was trying to hold back. "Oh god...okay. I'm on my way, I'll be there in a few hours. Just stay strong for me until then, okay?" She asked as I shook my head.
"N-no..you don't have to come." I said and held my chest. "It's not a question. You're crazy if you think I'm not coming." She said and put me on speaker phone. I could hear her rustling around her room, probably packing.
"I'm sorry." I cried out then put my head on my steering wheel. "Don't be silly, I wanted to come visit you anyways." She said then took me off speaker phone.
"I have to go so I can get a flight, are you gonna be okay?" She asked as I nodded. "Yeah, thanks Ki." I said and wiped my cheek. "I love you, V. I'll text you when I land just send me your address." She said as I nodded. "Love you too." I said then hung up.
I sat in my car for a long time, just sitting there. I didn't know how I was supposed to act or feel. I just sat there holding the necklace she gave me.
I was grateful that Ki was coming to be with me because I honestly don't think I would have made it through this alone.
I still didn't even know if I would make it through this in general.