"Hey, sweetheart... How're you feeling?"

I sighed at my fiancée's voice over the phone. I was laying in our bed, all alone, with a bucket where I should puke into, the meds and lots of water by the bedside table. Julian had taken a trip to China for business and I was left home alone. Not long after, Matisse, Harmony and some friends from work had a get together at the apartment and we all got Salmonellosis from the pizza Matisse had brought.

"Like I got a group of suicide bombers in my intestine, and the ninja turtles training with their weapons in my stomach."

"Ouch." He winced, and I chuckled "I'm really sorry I'm not there to take care of you. Are you taking meds?"

"Too many, in my opinion. I honestly only needed one and that's a sleeping pill, so I could wake up a week from now and be cured, with you right here with me" I sighed, rolling in bed and turning into fetal position, under the covers.

"So how's the wedding planning? Have you booked Central Park, yet?" He teased with a chuckle.

I sighed. Julian was a simple man, I knew that from experience. But this was our wedding, and he had to understand I wouldn't be running to the City Hall with him one afternoon and just sign some papers! I wanted the whole thing; the dress, the party, the doves...!

"Can we be serious about this whole wedding thing, for a bit?" I mumbled, taking the covers off my face and staring into the dark room "Do you want to go to City Hall and get it over with?"

"Get it over with?"

"Yeah, you know, quick and painless?"

"You make it sound like it's a challenge for me to marry you."

"Not getting married, but having a party and all that, yes, I believe it's painful to you."

"Well, it is, and you know why. Look, we can have a party, but a small one, could that be arranged?"

"Matisse and your sister actually gave me some ideas while I was throwing up my entire dinner in their shoes" I smiled, remembering the very first urge to puke the morning after the big girl party.

"And what magnificent ideas did those two put in your head?" He tossed an amused snort.

"I was thinking... we could do a small thing – family and close friends, I mean – at my parents'."

He was silent for a while, and I bit my lower lip as I waited.

"How many close friends and family?" He put in, suspicious.

"Well, I was thinking small wedding, so... around seventy people?" I grimaced.

"Oh. Well... I was thinking more... around thirty or something..."

"Honey, that's not a wedding, that's sad." I assured him and he laughed "I have a big family, so seventy guests is just my side."

"Wait, just your side?! Jesus..." He sighed, and I could almost see him rubbing his eyes "Alright... I just got my family and Piet. And some friends from college, but that's it."

"So... wedding in Tennessee at a soy bean farm?" I smiled.

"Sweetheart, you could take me to Chernobyl without a biological suit, risking to get me testicular cancer, that I would marry you there." He stopped for a second, letting me giggle "Don't take me to a cancer pool, please."

"I promise. So... under a hundred people is ok? I'll cut some more people, promise" I added quickly as he hissed at the 'hundred'.

"Yes, under a hundred is... acceptable. I just really want to see you in the white dress and walking towards me. Damn, that's sissy!"

"It's not!" I giggled "Honey, I do love you, very much... but I'm really tired, and the meds are starting to take their win, so... I'm going to sleep, ok?"

"Call me tomorrow. Well, call me in about twelve hours, since it's noon here" He smiled, I could tell.

"I miss you..."

"I miss you more. And with that last cheesy line, I'm out" He tossed, to which I giggled one last time.

***

I looked up into the mirror with a deep breath. Time to see what it looked like after the last adjustment to my wedding dress. I'd started to take my time in the gym with Julian seriously and my strict diet as well – I know size doesn't matter but... well, I wanted to fit in the gown. I kept getting a little weight instead of losing it, though...

"C'mon out! We want to see it!" I heard Momma yell from the outside of the fitting room.

I felt my throat constrict and my eyes sting at what I saw in the mirror. The blonde heavy woman in there didn't look like me. The princess style dress didn't look nothing like the usual mumbo-jumbo I carried everyday – obviously. It was an A line dress – the shape would hide my big hips and emphasize my waist; the skirt was in tulle, same as the straps at the top, and the lace bodice had delicate details that made it look so feminine and almost fragile, something I knew I really wasn't. The white flower next to my left ear secured the waist length sheer veil, and the white heels finished the ensemble. I was a bride.

I tucked the curtain that hid me in the fitting room to the side and smiled – tears running down my cheeks, I admit – at my friends and family.

"Oh my God..." Momma whispered, cleaning some tears from under her eyes.

"You look so beautiful!" Harmony cried herself.

"Perfect" Matisse smiled.

"I feel perfect." I assured them, and the lady from the bridal store grinned happily, playing with my veil and my tulle skirt "This is the dress."

"Well, if it wasn't, you would be in real trouble, for they changed the waist for you three times already" My sweet sister Kim snorted with a grin.

"Kim!" Momma smacked her nape, to which she yelped, offended "It doesn't matter how many times it will take to make the dress fit you – although I'm convinced it looks perfect, now."

"Thanks, Momma." I smiled, facing the three way mirror and playing with my bell skirt "I can't wait to get married."

"Only three weeks to go." Matisse smiled "You can still back out, you know? I'll let you hide in my apartment."

"I'm good" I chuckled, as the lady from the store helped me take the veil off.

As we all parted ways, Matisse and I went to have lunch and check some last minute details – she was my maid of honor for Harmony didn't believe in marriage and thank God for that! Matisse was much more organized than my childhood best friend. Anyway, Matisse and Kim split the long list of Bridesmaid's duties in two, so I was safe.

"Alright, your flower girl is ok to go. Her flu is gone, and she'll be perfect for the wedding day." Matisse said as we started eating a salad and an orange juice at a bistro downtown "They're taking the chairs and the tables to your parents' house in two weeks, and Linda" That was my wedding planner "is going there one more time before the ceremony; she already arranged the whole thing with your mom, so don't worry about it."

"Good. What about..." I stopped talking to take a hand to my mouth "God, I can't wait for all this wedding stress to be over with. I can't cope with this stress ulcers."

"Stress ulcers, huh?" Matisse snorted, shaking her head.

"What?" I frowned.

"Honey, I know you're a blonde, but I thought you'd figure it out by now: vomiting, eating all the time, getting tired and stress... your mood swings."

I tilted my head to the side, not really following her conversation. Then, as I saw a tall skinny woman with a huge belly entering the bistro, I gasped and took my hands to my own stomach.

"You're joking, right?! We take precaution." I whispered, leaning over the table so only Matisse could hear me "I take the pill every day!"

"Really? What about your Salmonellosis? Did you take any other precaution while you were taking the drugs? 'Cause I'm sure you know antibiotics cut the pill effect."

I opened my eyes widely and smacked my forehead.

"You forgot?!" Matisse gasped and then had the nerve to laugh at my face "You've got to be kidding me! How could you forget something like that?! It's the number one thing women should remember!"

"Well, I'm sorry if it's offensive to you, but yes, I forgot. Plus, Julian was gone the whole week in China so... We missed each other." I flushed and rubbed my face "What do I do now, Matie?"

"You finish your salad and then we're going to a pharmacy so you can take a test." She sighed, still smiling "I know you'll probably kill me for saying this, but I'm really happy that you're pregnant."

"I'm not even married, yet!" I whined painfully, playing with my food "I cannot be pregnant before I get married, my parents will kill me! And Julian... We're not ready yet, Matie. I can't be pregnant. I bet you a thousand dollars-"

"You pink Chanel clutch" She grinned.

"So be it. I bet my clutch that I'm not pregnant!"

***

"What do two bars mean?" I mumbled painfully, sitting at the toilet in mine and Julian's apartment "Matie, what does the box say about two pink strips?"

"That Momma's got a new clutch!" She grinned, jumping up and down with happiness splashed on her blushed face "Momma being me, not you; you still have a few months before being called Momma."

I couldn't possibly...! No, the test was wrong, surely. I couldn't be pregnant! I wasn't married, yet! God, why does everything bad happen to me?!

"G, c'mon! You're gonna be a mommy not dead!" Matisse giggled.

"Matie, my future husband can't stand to do his own laundry. Can you imagine what changing diapers and getting puked on will do to him?" I moaned, tears running down my cheeks.

"Oops... Yeah, I forgot about that..." She sighed, coming back inside the bathroom to sit at my feet and grab my hands "All I can tell you is to go slow. Well, scratch that, you're already too late to go slow... Anyway, you know your fiancée, right? So, talk to him. Be calm, be strong. Just be you, sweetie. He loves you and wants to marry you. He wants kids, right?"

"Yeah. I mean, we both do, but we never actually discussed when to start trying..."

"Better this way, then. You didn't even have to think about it, it already happened. Done." She winked, getting up "Now, you should make an appointment with an Ob-Gyn and start taking prenatal vitamins. And no more mimosas, baby..."

***

It was, obviously, easier said than done. We were having dinner at home, like we usually did, and Julian was happily talking about the progresses at the company. I would mumble an 'Oh, really?' or a 'That's great'. What could I say, really? 'Hey, honey, guess what? We're having a baby!'?

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." I assured him, jumping as his hands grasped one of mine "I'm just a bit tired because of the wedding planning."

"You should rest, sweetheart. You've been working too hard, not only on the wedding, but at Pandora as well. Take it easy, ok?" He smiled, kissing my left hand, over the knuckle that held his ring.

"Ok, Daddy" I smiled, but then swallowed hard and looked down at my food again; great safe, McAllister...

"G, you look really tense. Just tell me what's wrong. Is it wedding jitters?" He frowned with worry.

"It's nothing. Honestly." I shrugged, but then I growled and took my hands to my face "I can't. I'm sorry, I just can't!"

"Can't what?" He frowned deeper, worry plastered on his tanned face "Are you too stressed out? I'll get off your foot, promise."

"Not about the wedding." I assured him, swallowing hard and not daring to stare up from my plate "I just can't lie to you."

"Lie to me?" He was sincerely confused, now "What are you talking about?"

I shook my head and left the kitchen. I barricaded myself in our bathroom and took deep breaths inside. On cue, Julian knocked on the door from the other side. He would always come after me, which was the only thing I really needed to know.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong? Come out and talk to me" He asked softly.

"I can't with you looking at me" I mumbled.

"Ok... Then talk to me like this. It's ok... I just really need to know what's up so, you know, I can help you."

I took one look at my hot pink lipstick standing on the toilet counter, and did as it came to my mind. Taking a deep breath I opened the bathroom door and faced him. He took a deep breath and stretched his arms so I could take cover in them. I shook my head and looked at my feet.

"It's ok." He assured me, waiting "Just spill it out and then we'll see what do to, deal?"

I grabbed the hem of my lavender tunic and heard him gasp. Yeah... maybe writing "Bun cooking" on my belly in hot pink lipstick wasn't the best idea. But what else could I do, really?

"You're pregnant?" He muttered, so low I almost didn't hear it.

"We are" I mumbled, with a nod, still looking at my usual round belly.

"I thought you took the pill."

"I had to take antibiotics when I was sick, remember?" I shrugged, shaking as I still held the shirt over my torso "I... forgot about... the pill thing..."

"So you're a month pregnant and you haven't been to the doctor, yet?!" He growled, and I jumped with surprise "Goddamn it, G! You got our baby inside of you! You're an irresponsible-"

I jumped into his arms. He huffed the air from his lungs and then chuckled in my ear.

"You're not mad?" I whined, my tears running down my face as he held me tight against his chest.

"Of course I'm not mad!" He laughed, kissing my neck and nuzzling it with tenderness "You got my bun in your oven, how could I be mad about that? Hilarious, by the way."

"I panicked." I chuckled, kissing his cheek "I panicked when I saw the pregnancy test. I wanted to tell you right away but... I was so scared, so... confused...! We're supposed to get married first!"

"I think we already passed the time where normal applies to our relationship." He assured me, rubbing my back and kissing my cheek as well "Sweetheart, we're getting married in three weeks, and we still have about eight months until that little guy comes along to torture us."

"You're right." I sighed, feeling much more relieved now that I had spilled what was consuming me "And by the way, my Dad's gonna kill you."

He chuckled and pulled me into his arms so he could kiss me long and hard. He pulled me out of the bathroom and into the bed, caressing my belly and mumbling sweet promises in my ear.

"One thing, though. We'll need to go to prenatal classes. I really can't change a diaper."

It was my turn to laugh and pull him to me. This man was perfect; well, perfect to me, anyway.

***

"You look nervous."

"That's probably because I am" I smiled at Daddy, once he put his arm around mine.

"You shouldn't be. You got a great husband and a wonderful team of family and friends." He assured me, pointing outside the back door so I could see the white chairs all aligned with the people that I loved waiting for me to walk down the backyard aisle "So calm down and just enjoy it."

I nodded too quickly. My stomach was holding, so far – thanks, baby daughter! –, but I couldn't really promise it would hold for that long. My feet were hurting, my head was spinning, and not just because it was hot as hell outside, under the spring sun of Tennessee, and not just because my dress was covering me from head to toe, plus the damn veil. No, my nervousness was because all that had happened this last year was finally getting to me.

Starting my career for real, having backstabbing idiots for friends, dating a movie star – who was now dating my own sister... weird –, falling in love with my boss, moving in with my boyfriend, getting my perfect job at Pandora, being asked to marry, getting pregnant and, finally, my wedding day. My life had really turned upside down over the last year, and I wouldn't trade one minute of it. Not even being gun pointed at or jumped on by my ex-boyfriend. No, everything that happened was for a reason, and all I'd been through made me who I was the day I got married.

"Alright, let's go!" My maid of honor Matisse smiled "He's starting to get impatient. You need to go before he gets into one of his zones."

I chuckled at my tall friend, dressed in the lavender bridesmaid's dress. All of my bridesmaids were already aligned ahead to enter the backyard, to walk on the green grass and toss – by my goddaughter Peyton the white petals. The minister and my future husband were already waiting, and the string quartet was playing a soft melody so I would start my first and only walk down the aisle, towards my man.

After the ceremony, we would gather around the long wooden tables with white and lavender centerpieces, under the strings of lights – just like a country party –, the folk band and the dance floor. I decided to compromise – same as Julian – and do a small and simple ceremony at my parents', with a reception that could be easily mistaken by a summer party. So what if it wasn't the big hotel or the Diane of Wales dress? It was still perfect, and honestly, I really much more preferred the vibe I felt when I start my walk down the aisle to meet Julian.

He was smiling as I walked slowly, with the help of my Dad. The late afternoon sun was setting, and the colors in the sky were magical – or maybe it was the rush going through my veins that made it so wonderful. When my Dad gave my hand away to my future husband, took the veil from my tear filled eyes and kissed my forehead, Julian grabbed my hand and tucked it to his heart.

"How're you both feeling?" Julian asked as he caressed my belly.

"Like we're home" I smiled, placing my hand over his.

And I was; I finally felt I'd made to port; I was finally home.

THE END