───── ❝ BEAUTIFUL ❞ ─────

i think they're beautiful

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The ride back home was filled with nothing but silence while you quietly sat at the back of Sanzu's bike. Ever since the kidnapping accident, Sanzu refused to let you go to different cities on your own and instead accompanied you. Fortunately, you were still able to convince him to allow you off on your own while he waited at your parent's home.

You had your arms wrapped around Sanzu's waist while you rested yourself on his back, solemn [e/c] eyes gazing towards the ocean shore that you were currently riding past. The events of the last hour flashed in your mind, paining your heart once more. Instinctively, you tightened your hold on Sanzu and closed your eyes as you looked forward, burying your face into his jacketed back.

It was silent, and to Sanzu, it was the loudest silence he has ever heard. He had grown accustomed to your non-stop talking about everything around you that the silence you now showed was foreign to him. He became used to your gentle voice and laughter ringing through his ears. But now, because of stupid decisions from very important adults in your life, your lips remained sealed, not a single sound of laughter heard.

And Sanzu would never admit it, but he didn't like it. At all.

Internally sighing, Sanzu steered his bike over to the side and parked it, much to your surprise. "Sanzu-san, what's going on?" You asked, temporarily perking up from your saddened state. You watched silently as the boy got up, your arms falling to your side. He fixed his long hair before turning to you with those same, dull eyes.

"Shopping." Was all he said, but it was enough to throw you into confusion and you gazed at him weirdly.

"Shopping?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because... It's nearly Christmas."

You blinked at the stoic boy with wife eyes. Shopping? You had to admit you had no idea if the boy was being sarcastic or not. But considering you were still a ways away from home and he decided to stop by the pier outdoor mall, you figured he had an ounce of seriousness in his words.

But you never took Sanzu for the gifting type. You were baffled at the current event but you went along with it regardless. Sanzu held his hand out to you and helped you off his bike. Once you were stable, you failed to take note of the way his hand lingered on yours for just a second too long due to your fascination at the shops around you.

With a wide smile on your face, you skipped further into the pier and gazed around you in awe, like a child at a candy store. Without even realizing it, you were brought out of your depressive state.

Sanzu stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets, following you everywhere you went. Beneath his mask, he hid a rare smile that he was unable to keep down due to his accelerating heart.

"Uwah... I'm surprised this place is still open!" You let out in awe as your eyes drifted between the various shops. "It's getting pretty cold now..."

The male looked at you, blue eyes lingering as he watched you wrap your arms around yourself and shiver ever so slightly. Without thinking, his hands made his way to the zipper of his jacket.

"I really care for her."

Sanzu paused as those words echoed in his mind. Hesitantly, he removed his hands from his zipper and instead stuffed them in his pockets. "Y-yeah..."

You seemed to quickly recover from the cold however, as something quickly caught your eye and you happily made your way towards it. It was a simple vendor that sold hot chocolate, which, for the cold weather, was perfect.

"She's actually quite simple to cheer up, really."

Before you were able to give they money for a cup of hot chocolate, Sanzu already had his hand out towards the vendor, giving just enough for you. "Sanzu-san, why'd you do that?!" You asked him, your mouth wide as he turned towards you, the hot beverage in his hand.

At first, the male didn't know what to say as you wearily took the drink. You looked at it with worry, guilt eating you up at the fact that he had just bought you a drink. Sighing, Sanzu grabbed your hand and led you away from the vendor before stoppin and turning to look at you. "Y- You always bought me drinks." Sanzu began, his eyes staring down at the ground and refusing to meet yours. "Especially [f/d]. Take this as my payment."

You frowned, both of your hands holding onto the hot chocolate. "But in return, you always make sure I'm safe! You protect me..."

"That's my job." Sanzu simply stated, before turning around and making his way to other shops.

[e/c] eyes lingered on the male as he walked away. Looking down at your hands where you held the hot chocolate, you took in a deep breath before following in his footsteps. When you caught up to him, you slowed down to match his steps. "Don't say that... it makes me feel like you're only dealing with me because you were instructed to— ah AH even though I know that's what it really is..."

Sanzu simply nodded his head, but you were so focused on the ground in front of you that you failed to see it.

Now that you really thought about it, Sanzu really did only spend time with you because he was told to. It wasn't like he willingly wanted to spend his days with you... He was just doing what Mikey told him to do.

'Mikey...' Your hands tightened around the cup you held as images of the blond male flashed in your mind. 'That time is coming... and I'll be all alone. Will you?'

Your sudden silence caught Sanzu's attention and he glanced over at you, instantly noticed your saddened expression and teary eyes.

"You better not let her cry!"

His breath hitched, internally freaking out. He thought the hot chocolate would be enough to make you feel better but apparently not.

With worry, his eyes began scanning all the shops you were walking by when something caught his eyes that he hoped would bring your spirits up. He stopped in his tracks and it took you a bit to notice. When you realized that your companion was no longer beside you, you stopped and turned to look at him. "Sanzu-san?" You questioned, wiping away a stray tear with your finger that you hoped Sanzu didn't notice.

The quiet male didn't say anything and instead pointed somewhere. Following the direction which his finger was pointing, your eyes laid upon a rather 'kawaii'-esque shop. What caught your eyes was the window display that showcased various cute things such as a cute baby pink dress and an adorable panda stuffed toy.

"Oh my gosh, that's so cute!" You squealed, instantly making your way towards the shop, briefly forgetting all your worries. Sanzu let out a sigh of relief as he followed you. "These are perfect for the girls! I'm sure Aiko-chan would love that panda! Ah, and that sweater would look so cute and Hina-chan too!" You muttered to yourself, eyes darting between every single item in your line of sight.

Turning towards Sanzu, the male had to admit the relief he felt the second he laid eyes on your bright smile. "Sanzu-san, I'll just be a moment, okay? You can wait out here for me!"

The male was about to counter as he felt uneasy about taking his eyes off of you for even a moment, but you were already inside the shop before he could get any words out of his mouth. Sighing, Sanzu trudged his way towards the shop door and opened it. He was about to make his way inside when a shiver suddenly rushed up his spine.

With wide eyes, the white haired male snapped his head back. He felt threatened. He felt watched. Sanzu's blue eyes scanned the area vigorously but saw nothing except shoppers who were going about their day. Despite this, the chill that ran up his spine was no fake. Turning back around, Sanzu was about to make his way inside when something at the corner of his eye caught his attention.

Something that made his heart stop.

"Sanzu, can I ask you a favour?"

"Yessir. What is it?"

"Sanzu-san? What's wrong?" Your voice brought Sanzu back to his senses and he snapped his head towards you. You nearly jumped back at the sight of his frightened eyes staring back at you.

"U-uhm, nothing."

You raised a brow. ''Uhm'? Sanzu-san doesn't go 'uhm''. Getting on your tip toes, you tried looking past Sanzu to see what must've gotten him so spooked, but the male kept getting in your way.

"There's someone I want you to protect."

Frowning, you furrowed your brows. "Sanzu-san." You stated simply, eyes glaring up at the usually stoic boy.

The white-haired male's eyes then went to the bag that hung on your arm, and he pointed at it. "What did you end up getting?"

Sanzu was thankful you were so easy to get distracted as your face instantly lit up as you lifted the bag in front of him. "Oh! Yeah, I ended up getting the panda stuffy and the sweater!" You pulled up the individual items as you introduced them before looking up in thought. "Hm, but I still need to get something for Emma-chan. Oh, by the way, what do you think Senju-san will like?" You questioned innocently, blinking up at the male.

"She's really important to me, so I want you to keep her safe. Physically and mentally."

"Mentally?"

"She... gets sad pretty often. And sometimes quite easily... If possible, I also want you to be there to cheer her up."

"Huh? Hell if I know."

"She's your sister!"

"So?"

You sighed, giving up on getting some sense in the boy and instead pushed him aside. "Whatever, we should go, I still wanna browse before—"

"I know it's a lot to ask of you, so I won't be surprised if you don't want to do it. It's perfectly fine."

And that was Sanzu's biggest mistake of the day. He had quickly forgotten of the scene that had caught his eye and left you exposed to what he feared would hurt you.

It was the first thing that caught your eye. You don't know why, they were pretty far from where you stood but your gaze was, for some reason, drawn towards that direction. And you had hoped it didn't.

"No, no. You gave me the orders, so I will do what you want me to do,"

As you stood frozen, you gazed with wide eyes at what you saw, your mood instantly bombarding down.

"Mikey."

"Mi-... Manjiro?"

You were breathless as his name came out of your mouth. Further ahead, Mikey sat on a bench. But he wasn't by himself. He was with a girl. You squinted as you tried to get a glimpse of her, getting a feeling of familiarity from her.

And that was when it hit you. That same, long and luscious black hair that draped perfectly over her shoulders. The deep purple eyes that looked at the boy beside her with absolute happiness.

'Isn't that... Ran's ex-girlfriend? Kumiho? No... Kumiko, right.'

Your hands unconsciously tightened around the bag in your hands as a whirlpool of emotions began to fill you. It has been a long while since you and Mikey had separated but 'Now of all times?!' Instantly, you could feel your eyes sting as they warned of tears falling down.

Sanzu stared down at you before looking back at the scene. "[na]-"

"Let's go home. I feel... tired." You simply stated, keeping your head down as you turned away from the heartbreaking scene in front of you. Without even waiting for the boy's reply, you walked off, heading back towards Sanzu's bike.

As you passed by the male, his eyes went back to Mikey only for his eyes to go wide. Mikey was looking at them with shock on his face. He had seen them. Sanzu looked towards your retreating form then back at Mikey who seemed to be trying to get up when he noticed you, but Kumiko wrapped herself around his arm and kept him in place.

Clenching his fists, Sanzu gave a curt nod to Mikey before going off to catch up to you, letting the blond boy disappear behind the sudden influx of shoppers.

Your lips were quivering as you walked. You had your arms wrapped around your shopping bag, needing any kind of comfort from anything after what you had just seen.

'Idiot! Idiot! Stupid! Of course he doesn't care it's nearly been a year. Of course he's moved on. Of course he's forgotten all about you. Why were you making such a big deal about it?! Now you just look absolutely stupid!'

You stood by Sanzu's bike, violently wiping away the loose tears that fell from your eyes. From your peripheral vision, you caught sight of a handkerchief being handed towards you, and you looked towards it to see Sanzu.

Chuckling through the sadness, you grabbed the cloth from Sanzu and wiped your tears. "Let's go..." You muttered, eyes gazing towards the ocean shore.

Sanzu eyed you for a second then looked on towards the ocean. The sun was nearly set, just half of it seen along the horizon. It painted the earth in a beautiful orange and pink hue while the ocean glistened back it's reflection. It was truly a magnificent sight.

"Can we stay here for a while?" He was about to ask those same words to you, but you beat him to it. Looking down at you, you were rummaging through your bag and suddenly pulled out your polaroid camera. You sent a smile his way, and though it seemed genuine, Sanzu could see the sadness that danced in your eyes.

Nodding his head, you and Sanzu then made your way towards the beach. Due to it being winter, it was a lot colder than you anticipated and you shivered as a strong gust of wind flew past you. The two of you eventually found a bench to sit at that overlooked the scenery, and you quickly got to work.

While Sanzu sat quietly beside you, you tried to find the perfect angle to take the photo in. He heard you grumble and sigh as you work before he turned to you and found that you were squirming and turning in your seat.

After hearing you sigh, Sanzu finally turned to look at you to see you dejectedly drop your camera onto your lap as you slump over.

"Not having any luck?" Sanzu asked simply.

You shook your head, "They don't feel right."

"How can it feel right, it's just a sunset?"

You smiled up at the boy, "It may just be a sunset, but it's beautiful, don't you think?"

Sanzu looked at you before looking back at the scenery in front of him. His heart skipped a beat. "I guess so."

"Mikey, can I ask something?" Sanzu spoke up, eyes looking down at the ground.

"What is it?" The blond asked, looking over at the boy with curiosity.

"You... you say you 'love' this girl, right?"

"... yes. With all my heart."

Silence enveloped the two of you, and you went back to trying to take a photo of the sunset. You didn't have many polaroids with you at the moment, so you wanted to take a perfect one in one shot. You occasionally drank from the now cold hot chocolate that Sanzu got you.

"Uhm, Sanzu-san, may I ask you something?" You questioned, head turning towards him. The boy hummed in response. "Why do you wear that mask all the time? Are you sick?"

You noticed how Sanzu stiffened at your question and your eyes went wide, "Ah, you don't have to answer if you're not comfortable! It's fine, I'm sorry if I overstepped any boundaries." You mumbled shyly at the end, turning your focus to the sunset.

Sanzu was silent for a while, and your heart beat faster with every passing second. 'Ah, I knew I shouldn't have asked!' You scolded yourself, shutting your eyes tightly and internally screaming. 'Of course he wouldn't tell you, he's only around because he's told to so it's not like you two are actually close!'

"It's fine." Sanzu's voice brought you out of your internal dilemma and you turned your head to face him. With wide eyes, you were left speechless as Sanzu brought his hands to his ears, effortlessly removing the mask from his face to reveal what he was hiding all along. Two diamond shaped scars bordered either side of his mouth.

There was a moment of silence, and Sanzu felt anxious that you weren't saying anything. Clicking his tongue, he quickly moved to place his mask back on. However, before he could, your hand reached out to grab him, stopping him in his tracks.

"What're you doing?" You gently asked, a soft smile on your face. "Why're you hiding it?"

Sanzu refused to look you in your eyes. "It's hideous."

"Bullshit!" Your counter came so quickly that it caught Sanzu off guard and he snapped his head towards you. "You may think that but I think otherwise. In fact, I know that it's not hideous!"

"She has this energy that just draws you into her." Mikey explained as he stared lovingly at the sunset in front of him. "No matter the darkness that you face, it's like she's always the light that will bring you out of it."

Sanzu scoffed, turning away but not placing his mask back on. "You're just saying that to be nice."

"No, really!" You urged, "I think they're beautiful. It makes you unique... it makes you you." Sanzu slowly turned his head towards you as you continued to speak. "I'm sure that whatever you went through to get such scars must have been traumatizing, and I'm sure the pain is something you never forget and no expects you to. But those scars and the story behind them is what make you who you are today.

"I don't know more than outside of this whole bodyguard thing, for all I know you could be a complete psychopath." You chuckled nervously, "But from what I've seen, you are an amazing person, Sanzu-san. And I think that in itself is absolutely beautiful."

Sanzu didn't realize it, but he was holding his breath majority of the time you spoke. Never once in his life did he feel valued. His siblings would show care for him but where they ever genuine? What if they were faking it? The only one that ever mattered in his life was Mikey.

"Mikey, with all due respect, if you love her as much as you say you do, why don't you watch her yourself?"

Mikey was silent for a moment, not even sparing a glance to look back at the white-haired male. At first, Sanzu figured he had overstepped the line and was quick to apologize when Mikey finally spoke up. "I'm scared."

He was simply a pawn in the hands of the person who gave him the very scars that bombed his self-esteem. The very scars that you were praising. His eyes watched as you began to stutter, your face reddening as you realized the rant you were going on. For the majority of his life, the only one that ever mattered to Sanzu was Mikey.

But...

"Scared?"

"Yeah... I'm scared I'll fuck up somehow. Lose her more than I already have. I don't want to mess things up and push [name]-chin further away from me... It's complicated, really." Mikey chuckled, "But do you understand?"

"I explain very badly, but, do you understand what I mean, Sanzu-san?"

"Yes."

"Yeah."

You smiled up at the boy as he answered, before looking back at now disappearing sunset. The sky was now becoming a beautiful blend of purple, pink and blue with spots of white. Your eyes travelled down to your folded hands that rested on your lap, as heat suddenly began rising to your face. "You know... Sanzu-san, thank you."

The male raised a brow and glanced at you. "For?"

"For... a lot of things!" You didn't know you suddenly found it difficult to come up with the words you wanted to say. There were so many things you wanted to thank the male for. "For the hot chocolate... for coming with me everywhere I go. For dealing with all my stupid decisions. For always protecting me!" Your mind flashed the earlier scene and you instantly connected the dots to why Sanzu was acting so weird. "For trying to not make me any sadder than I already am."

It didn't take long, and tears once again formed on the brim of your eyes and gently fell. You tried to chuckle off the actions as you wiped the tears away using Sanzu's handkerchief but to no success. "Man, you're probably tired of seeing me like this all the time!" You tried to joke.

"Not at all." Sanzu said in a serious tone.

You were slightly taken aback by his reply before letting out a soft giggle. "Y- Y'know, today was starting out as such a good day." You began, the urge of spilling everything out to the male rapidly overwhelming you. "I was finally able to do something that I have been training for for weeks and I got to see my family... and then I find out that very same family is leaving me during Christmas and New Years..."

Just the thought of being alone during such a vulnerable time of the year was enough to let the waterworks loose once again as a fresh batch of tears made their way down your cheeks. You clenched your fists tightly around the handkerchief, numerous negative emotions filling you up. No matter what you did, you couldn't get the sight of Mikey with another girl out of your mind.

"This may be insensitive of me, but why is that such a bad thing?" Sanzu questioned innocently, "There will be many more Christmases and New Year's to come."

"Yes but..." You went silent, internally arguing with yourself whether to tell Sanzu or not. 'What's the point of hiding it? I told him a lot already.' Taking in a deep breath, you prepared yourself. "The thing is... Christmas last year... was when Manjiro broke up with me."

Sanzu's eyes widened at your words and regret filled him much more at the thought of letting you be exposed to something that would break you earlier. Is that why you wanted to spend the holidays with your family?

"I- I know it's a stupid reason." You began to explain, "But... I really did love Manjiro. I thought that him and I would be it." You clenched your fists as you continued speaking, "I thought I would be okay a few months after the break up, but now I see him more again! I talk to him more now, and sometimes, my delusional self gets hope that maybe, just maybe, he still feels the same.

"I guess the way I'm feeling now is all my fault." You continued. "I shouldn't have allowed myself to get my hopes high like that. I was setting myself up for heartbreak. Of course Mikey already found someone else... I don't know why I ever thought he would still care for me like that." As you ended your rant, your sadness gradully became annoyance and you pouted as you wiped the tears from your face.

Sanzu watched as you gathered yourself before speaking. "That's why you wanted to spend time with your family?"

You frowned and held your hands together. "To not be alone."

"But who says you need them?"

"?"

"Your family? Who says you need them to not be alone?" Sanzu began. "I have Senju and the old man, but I've always felt alone. You have your friends, right? What was that short girl's name, Aiko? You also have Hinata, Senju and even Emma." As Sanzu spoke, you stared at him with glistening eyes. You felt a weird sensation in your chest as he spoke and you swore you could feel your heart beat faster and faster. "You have Mikey, Draken, Baji, Chifuyu, almost all of Toman are willing to drop whatever it was they were doing for you. So you won't be alone.

"And if for some reason, none of them want to spend the holidays with you, well..." Sanzu took a deep breath. He was feeling it too. The weird feeling in his chest as he spoke and his quickening heart beat. Would this be right to say? What about Mikey? He can't betray Mikey, right?

"Well, then just call me." Upon hearing those words, you sucked in a breath and placed a hand to your chest, your eyes wide as you gazed at the now red-faced boy. "Call me, and I'll be there." Gathering up the courage, Sanzu turned to look at you. "And we can be lonely together."

You were speechless upon hearing Sanzu's words. Your mouth was agape as you stared at him and you felt tears running down your face. You were stunned, shocked... happy.

With no conscious thought, you had began leaning closer and closer to the boy, laying a hand down on the bench inbetween you to keep your balance. You didn't know what it was that made you do it. Maybe it was your loopy emotions. Maybe it was the beautiful scenery in fornt of you and the way the moonlight shone down perfectly on Sanzu's face. Maybe it was the way that his words left you feeling so secure and reassured. No matter what it was, you had no intention of stopping.

Sanzu looked on at you with wide eyes, noticing how you leaned closer and closer. He didn't make any motion to move, neither further or closer. He simply looked on at you. He would never admit it out loud, but Sanzu had developed care for you. The past few months where you would spend days together was something he enjoyed and eventually looked forward to.

Would this be okay? Would this be betraying his loyalty to Mikey? Mikey entrusted him to protect you because of his love for you. Sanzu knew the feelings Mikey held for you. He didn't know why he was with another girl, but he knew that Mikey would walk to the ends of the Earth for you. So why...

Why didn't he tell you? Why did Sanzu let you believe that Mikey no longer held feelings for you? He would never, for a second, think of betraying Mikey and his trust. But just for this one moment... this one instant...

Sanzu wanted to be selfish.

Your eyes fluttered close as you neared the boy, your heart beating faster and faster with every second you moved. Your first kiss. You thought it would have been Mikey, but here you were, ready to give it to Sanzu. You were nervous behind comprehension, but nothing was going to stop you.

The only thing that would have stopped you was if Sanzu himself didn't want to kiss you.

And that's when the thought hit you. 'Shit! I went to this thinking there was a moment but maybe I misread...'. You opened your eyes and began to move back, "I'm so sorry Sanzu, I thought there was a-"

You were unable to finish your sentence, for within a split second, two hands cuppped your face before pulling you in close. Your eyes were wide as you felt the sensation of soft lips on yours.

And in that moment, everything stopped.

The kid running down the pier stopped, right before he tripped and fell. The street vendor waving around her bell froze mid-motion as did the customer approaching her. The cars on the street stopped in an instant, no matter the speed.

It was just you and Sanzu.

Your wide eyes gently fluttered close as one of your hands rested on Sanzu's chest. You feel one of his hands move away form your face before you felt a warm grasp on top of your supporting hand on the bench.

In that instant, you were overwhelmed with emotion and tears, happy tears, began to spill from your eyes. For this small moment, the world belonged to you and Sanzu as you accompanied each other in your loneliness.

Both of your minds flickered with numerous thoughts, majority of them wondering if what you were doing is right. But you both knew the answer and that even if it wasn't neither of you cared.

Sanzu could be making the biggest mistake of his day, maybe even his life. It could be a bigger mistake than when he allowed you to see Mikey and that girl together. But it all worked out in his favour. He will deal with the consequences of his actions another day, but now, he just wanted to relish in his moment.

This may or may not have been Sanzu's biggest mistake of the day, but one thing is for sure.

It was the most beautiful.

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[OMAKE]

The boy stood there in silence, his fists clenched as he looked at the scene in front of him. He wanted to scream out, to stop them, to explain what they saw, but his body refused to let him do any of that.

Defeated, he held back tears and turned away, leaving the two alone.

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hehehhehehehehheehehehehehhehe

is sanzu ooc? yes.

are we going to ignore it? also yes.

hopefully the way I wrote it wasn't too confusing!

btw who do you think needs more attention in the story? I feel like I might be forgetting some people or leaving some love interests out. i honestly don't remember so I'd love to get some answers!!

hope you enjoyed :)

don't forget to vote and comment!