3,656 words 

 
|the mcu world|

Chris' POV

I awake groggily the next morning with no hangover whatsoever. I silently thank Steve for that as I get up and drag my tired ass to the bathroom to take a shower. I can hear people talking downstairs, so clearly I'm not the first one to wake up this morning. I wonder if Bucky's awake yet?

Oh god, Bucky. How the hell am I going to face him after last night? I royally screwed everything up in my drunken state, all within 24 hours. I'm not a very good Steve, even though I've played the guy for a decade. I overthink everything that occurred last night as I shower, letting my mind wander to home. I have so many questions about what's going on back home. Is time frozen there? That'd make the most sense. Everything is just frozen until I get back, if I get back.

Strangely though I don't think that's the case. I think time is going on as normal, I'm just not there. I just want to know if Steve took my place like I took his, that's all. If he has, he's with Sebastian right now. What if Sebastian likes him better than me? What if I get replaced by him? Sebastian wouldn't even want me back then. I don't see why he would, Steve is immensely better than me in all aspects. The only thing I got him beat at is sex, since the dude is a 100 year old virgin. But Sebastian would probably find that endearing.

Ugh, I hate this.

There's a sudden knock at the door, I nearly jump out of my skin. I switch the water off quickly, done procrastinating getting out. "Rogers, you in there?" Asks a familiar voice. I can't help but smile.

Natasha Romanoff, the Avenger that's the closest to Steve. She also just so happens to be one of my best friends in real life, so I think it'll be easy to get along with her in this world. I just have to remember that I'm Steve and not Chris.

I need to think of this as method acting, just 24/7. I wrap a towel around my waist and head over to the door, "Yeah?" I ask as I open the door and peek out at her, remembering to deepen my voice.

She doesn't pay my appearance any attention, something I admire about her. She's never been interested in Steve romantically, which is nice. I've played Scarlett's love interest in a movie before and we briefly dated in our youth, it was only a short term fling, but I don't want anything even remotely similar to happen in this world. I am excited to delve into this iconic friendship though.

Her infamous red hair is tied back into a neat ponytail, her face clean of any makeup. She looks like she's ready to train. Oh god, please no. "Pepper brought breakfast for everyone, stop sulking up here alone and join us. Even your bestie is down there." She smirks, ruffling up my hair before turning and walking off back down the corridor towards the stairs.

I love her already.

"I'll be down there in a minute." I call out before shutting the bathroom door. I begin to get dressed, humming a random Queen song under my breath as I pull on my jeans. I hate Steve's fashion sense so much, I need to go shopping. He's in desperate need of a new wardrobe and I refuse to continue to dress like this. I look like a depressed church boy. I button up my shirt and quickly brush my teeth, still shocked at the person looking back at me in the mirror.

I look as though I just stepped off set, so insanely Steve Rogers looking that I can hardly stand it. This whole thing is nuts, why the hell did drunk me wish for this? Now I have to learn how to fight so the Avengers don't accidentally kill me during training one day. What if the tower got attacked? I'd be doomed.

If I die here that's a big chance I'll die in my world too. I can't risk that.

I comb my hair and then huff my cheeks, taking one last long look at my appearance before exiting the bathroom. I grab my phone from my room before heading downstairs, smiling at the picture of Bucky that Steve has set as his homescreen. He's smirking in it, leaning against a doorframe, arms folded over his chest. He looks so smug. It's hot.

It didn't take me long to figure out Steve's password either. It was Bucky's birthday. Obvious much? Geez, you'd think he'd be more clever with his passwords, anyone could hack into his phone if they have any inkling of how important Bucky is to him.

"Well, if it isn't the man of the hour, how you feeling, Cap?" Tony asks as soon as I step into the dining room. I look up from the phone, eyes widening when I see everyone sitting around the table like an actual family. I never imagined the Avengers ate breakfast together like this, it's nice. Tony sits on one end, Bucky on the other. Clearly the conflict isn't resulted between them, but at least they're being civil. Ha, civil. Civil war.

I avoid looking at Bucky, staring at Tony instead. "Feeling much better. Can't remember anything from last night though." I carefully lie, deciding to play the whole thing off. Maybe that'll fix things with Bucky, I hope.

Tony nods, motioning to the empty seat next to Bucky, "Have a seat. Glad you're getting back to normal. You had us worried for a minute there." I sit down in the empty seat, looking down at the plate of food resting on the table in front of me instead of meeting Bucky's burning gaze.

I smirk at Tony, "You were worried? About me? Wow, I didn't know you cared, Stark." I tease, taking a bite of the yummy looking pancakes after applying some syrup.

Sam is sitting directly across from me, a knowing look on his face as he looks between Bucky and I. Why the hell did I tell him anything last night? That's going to come back to bite me in the ass, soon probably. I stuff my mouth with pancakes to avoid talking, not wanting to risk saying anything stupid again.

"I just don't want you slacking on the job." Tony argues with a smirk.

I take a sip of my orange juice, "Do I still get the rest of the week off?" I ask smugly.

He narrows his eyes, lowering his newspaper, "I suppose. Just don't let yourself get so distracted that you distract any of us. We still have jobs to do, even if you don't."

I nod, "I'll keep that in mind." We don't talk anymore after that, Tony chatting to Natasha, talking about some new mission they're going on today. Just the two of them. Sounds dangerous, I'm glad I'm not going.

I finish my pancakes and then start on my eggs, "You really don't remember anything from last night?" Bucky asks suddenly, voice lowered. I raise my head, meeting his glazed over stormy blue eyes.

He looks drained, like he didn't sleep at all last night. He has more stubble than last night too, it shouldn't look as good as it does. His longish hair is framing his handsome face quite nicely, and I have to remind myself that I can't reach out and touch it like I so desperately want.

I gulp, "No." I lie, sending him a small smile, "Why, what happened? And when'd you two get back?" Playing it dumb is easy, I'm an actor. If I was bad at this I wouldn't have ever gotten the role as Captain America in the first place.

Realization dawns and his expression instantly changes. His eyes brighten and a sincere smile forms on his stunning face, "We got back late last night. We talked a little before you went to bed, guess you don't remember."

"Yeah. I left you two alone in the living room." Sam adds in, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at me.

I arch my brow, ignoring Sam completely and looking at Bucky, "Oh?" I take another bite of my eggs, "What'd we talk about?"

His eyes widen. I caught him off guard. His hand shakes as he grabs his glass of water and takes a long sip. He clears his throat, gently setting the glass back down on the table, "We, uh." He scratches the back of his neck with his hand, his leg shaking underneath the table. "We just talked about the mission, that's about it." He lies, pursing his lips, eyes darkening, "Why? Is there something else you thought we'd talk about?"

He's baiting me. Nicely played, Barnes. This is something Sebastian would never do. He'd just bluntly say whatever's on his mind, but Bucky won't. Bucky wants me to say it, to acknowledge it. But I won't either. Sorry buddy.

Sam stands up from the table, though his plate isn't empty. He just wants to get away from this conversation, from the tension that's building between Bucky and I. I understand that. "I'll check y'all later." He mumbles before walking off towards the stairs. Bucky pays him absolutely no attention, solely focused on me and my every move.

I shrug my shoulders, still playing coy with Bucky, "I don't know. I do know one thing though." I finish my eggs and then push my plate forward.

He narrows his eyes, "And what's that?" He's got this half smirk on his face now, making my stomach flip. Is he aware of how good looking he is? Does he have any idea what he's doing to me?

I finish my orange juice, licking my lips before I stand up from the table. I play it cool, casual. "I missed you." I tell him with a small smile, grabbing my empty plate and heading into the kitchen without glancing back.

I hear clattering of dishes and then footsteps, he's following me. I smile to myself. I find the kitchen quite easily, the light turning on automatically when I step through the doorway. It's a very expensive looking room, with all the latest appliances, the counters all a white marble color that matches the flooring. Tony has taste, I'll give him that. Robert is more of an old fashioned kind of guy.

I can feel Bucky's presence in the room with me. I pretend like I can't, placing my plate in the sink and switching the water on so I can wash it off.

"One of these days I'm gonna teach you how to use a dishwasher." he teases with a vibrant chuckle, gently taking the plate out of my hand with his metal hand. It's the first time I've let myself really notice it, the detail and absolute beauty of it. I watch in awe as he opens the dishwasher and places his and my plate inside it, along with our silverware and glasses. He grabbed mine off the table because I had forgotten it, what a gentleman.

I wait until he's started the machine before I reach out and take hold of his metallic arm, pulling it towards me. He lets me, a curious look dancing in his blue grey eyes, his expression softening. It's cold to the touch, but not in a bad way, just different. I trace the black and dark red star with my fingers, frowning slightly, "We need to paint this a different color." I mumble, the sight making me sick to my stomach. Hydra did this to him, all that actually happened. He had to endure all that. It isn't pretend here, it's real. The poor baby.

My fingers move downwards towards the hand, there's a few scratches from battles he's been in but otherwise the metal is still shiny. I play with the fingers, which Bucky closes over my own, intertwining our fingers cautiously, "How does it work? How can you move it like it's apart of you?" I ask curiously, meeting his eyes. He's got this dazed look on his face, his gorgeous lips wet with his saliva, meaning he's recently run his tongue over them.

He cracks a smile, "It was made so it'd really work as though it's my actual arm." He explains with a shrug, voice velvety smooth.

It does fit with my hand nicely, almost perfectly. Guess Steve's hand was really meant to hold Bucky's, I love how cheesy that is. I hum, removing my hand from his, causing him to frown. He steps back from me, lowering his head, "C'mon, we're gonna fix that star." I tell him with a wild grin, grabbing the sleeve of his black sweater and pulling him out of the room with me.

He chuckles, "What's gotten into you? You're acting so.. strange.." He lets me pull him up the staircase, the Avengers no longer in the dining room, so they aren't around to see this, thank god. There's no telling what they'd be thinking about me actually pulling Bucky upstairs, my own imagination is already running wild.

Fuck, am I not acting like Steve? Is this not something Steve would do? I can't help that I've never seen the playful side of him, only the sad. The angsty. The writers should've written some other stuff in the movie scripts that could've helped prepare me for this. I'm in way over my head. "Just missed you." I say nonchalantly, still pulling him along behind me as we head through the corridors. He doesn't stop me either.

I hear him inhale sharply, "I missed you too." He voices softly, reminding me of Sebastian for a moment. We reach Steve's bedroom and I quickly open the door, releasing my hold on Bucky's sleeve. He stands awkwardly in the doorway, looking around the room with childlike curiosity, "I've never seen your room before." He mumbles, eyes landing on the stack of books, "It's just as I expected it'd be." He lightly teases, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the door frame.

I roll my eyes, opening the dresser and pulling out some paint I found the other day when I first arrived here. I'm in no way an artist like Steve, but I think I can handle painting a little star. "Don't just stand there, buddy. Come in." I grab the colors I want and then put the others away, gently closing the drawer back.

I watch Bucky walk in, eyes trained on the small bottles of paint in my hands. He raises his eyebrows, "Why the sudden interest in my arm? You've never paid it much attention before."

I shrug, "Just didn't like seeing their symbol on you," I explain as I step towards him, "Now sit on the edge of the bed so I can do this." I order with a shy smile.

"Bossy." He mumbles under his breath with a smirk. He uncrosses his arms before sitting down, now having to look up to meet my eyes. It's a beautiful sight to say the least, Bucky Barnes looking at you like you're the most important thing in the universe. I certainly don't deserve it. I can't let myself get caught up in it either, I'm already in love with Sebastian, I can't go falling in love with Steve's man. I sit down next to him but turn to my side so I can get a better angle, "You gotta be still." I tell him firmly, grabbing the paintbrushes and pallet off the dresser before sitting back down.

He relaxes his shoulders, exhaling a deep breath. He's staring straight ahead, his hair covering part of his face from me. I can't help myself, I gently tuck it behind his ear with my hand, avoiding eye contact the entire time. I hear his breath hitch. "I haven't been apart of your art projects since the 40s." He laughs, and though I can't see his face, I know he's smiling.

I open the bright red bottle of paint and pour a generous amount onto the pallet. So this is something past Steve would do? That's good to know. Maybe this isn't that out of character after all. I start painting the star, filling it in completely with the red. He keeps still as I told him, his gentle breathing the only movement. "You're still my muse." I confess softly.

His body tenses a little, but not enough to mess me up. I finish filling in the star and then switch paintbrushes, pouring some blue paint onto the pallet. He sighs dramatically, "This is the longest we've hung out alone since I moved in here, you know that? Everyone else is always around,"

I stop my actions, gazing up at him through my lashes. The second my curious blue eyes look into those stormy blue ones I realize how gone for him I already am. His are a shade darker than Sebastian's, a different kind of pretty. He doesn't look at me with that dazzling smile like Seb, Bucky's is reserved and hesitant. I could fall in love with him, fast. It'd be so easy too, to let myself give in to this role and have Bucky. So easy. But I can't. I really can't allow myself to get that attached. What if I do and then have to go home later? I'll never see him again. I'll be in love with someone I can never see again. I'm already in that situation with Sebastian.

"We need to hang out more." I decide with a smile that he gladly returns.

He nods in agreement, "What about tonight? We could train together or something."

Oh god please no. He would destroy me. I shake my head, refocusing on painting, "I was thinking we could explore the city together instead, maybe grab some dinner?" I paint the outline of the star with the blue, making it look exactly like something you'd see on a Captain America suit. I hope he likes it, because this is permanent paint. There's no going back.

"How romantic." He jokes with a breathy sigh. I finish and then lean back to admire my work. It doesn't look look professional, but it also doesn't look sloppy. Mission accomplished.

"I'm done, you can go look." I gather all the art supplies and then stand up. I put the paint up and then grab the pallet and paintbrushes so I can go clean them off.

Bucky slowly stands up from the bed and walks over to the dresser, looking at his freshly painted metal arm in the mirror. I watch his lips twitch upwards into a smile after a few moments, it meeting his eyes. "It matches your suit." He notes in realization, looking back at me through the mirror, "Thank you, Stevie."

I coyly smile, "You're welcome."

He turns around, glancing at the stuff in my hands. "Want me to help you clean up?" He offers kindly, batting his long eyelashes at me. I can't refuse him when he does that, now can I?

I nod and together we walk into the bathroom down the hall together. I hand him the pallet to clean while I do the paintbrushes, our hands brushing together in the sink almost purposely. He audibly clears his throat, "Hey, Steve?"

I finish cleaning out the second paintbrush and then dry them both with a towel, "Yeah, Bucky?" I fire back, using the same hesitant tone as him.

He buries his metal hand into his front jean pocket, handing me the now clean pallet with his human one, "I'd love to hang out with you in the city tonight."

I feel giddy. This sounds like a date. I mean, it isn't a date, I won't let it be, but it sounds like one. I bite my bottom lip, shyly gazing into his hopeful blue eyes, "Okay. You can pick the restaurant."

He smirks, "It's a date." The smile drops from my face, my stomach doing somersaults. He notices this, a frown overtaking his own features, he holds his hands up in defense, "I mean, not an actual date, obviously, that's just a saying, I was just-"

I wave him off, "I get what you meant, Buck. Calm down." I reassure him, though my heart is aching inside my chest and none of this feels right. He's in love with Steve, he clearly wants it to be a date. But I'm not Steve, I can't take advantage of him like that. Even if I want to.

He doesn't look convinced, but he nods nonetheless, a false smile forming on both our faces. "I have to go train with Sam right now. I sort of promised." He runs his trembling hand through his hair, "D-Do you want to join us?"

I wish I could, buddy. Sadly you both would kill me in a second if I even attempted to train with you. This could serve as a problem later. I really am in over my head here. I shake my head, patting him on the back gently, "No thanks. My stomach still feels queasy, I don't wanna chance it, you know? I'll just see you tonight."

He nods in understanding, "Oh yeah, I forgot about that." He reaches out, placing the back of his hand to my forehead. My breath catches in my throat. Yeah, I'm a goner for Bucky Barnes. Damnit. He observes me for a moment before removing his hand, "You feel alright, that's a good sign. Maybe you should take it easy just to be safe though. We can hang out after I finish with Sam."

I shoot him a smile, "Have fun."

He shakes his head, smirking mischievously, "Nothing is fun without you."

I'm going to fall so in love with him. Fuck.