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Quinn

It's been three days.

Three days since I last saw him or heard of him, well since I last heard of anyone. I had locked myself in my room and restricted any form of life. I had my doors locked, the lights off and the curtains shut. The only thing that had entered my body to keep me going was the pack of water beside me on my bed.

I ran out of tears, out of the will to even breathe. I had spoken to God a million times telling him to take me, I was exhausted. I was lost. I didn't know what to do or think. I made myself distant from the real world hoping for this to all be a dream.

The thoughts of all the moments I had with Angus flashed through my mind, followed by the thoughts of the moments with Ace. I was stuck in a real loop. Was I a bad person for wishing to be with Ace? A bad person whose heart was longing for the one who caused her brother his life?

The tears strolled down the side of my face and my lips quivered. I asked myself, if I knew this would all happen would I still have agreed to the dating proposal on that day? Would I still have let myself fall for him? Would have still have let him into my heart and soul?

And the answer was yes, I love him so much that it hurt to imagine we never happened.

My eyes moved to my phone on the side table. Has he called? Did he try to reach me? I folded my hands into a fist to stop myself from reaching for the phone.

A loud bang on my door interrupted my thoughts and my hands flew to my chest in shock. I slowly sat up as another continuous banging erupted.

"Quinn, open up!" Kenna's urgent voice came through the door as I stumbled on my own feet trying to get to the door.

I groaned as I ran my hand through my hair trying to get up again. My whole mind was crammed and my feet felt like I attached sandbags to them.

"Quinn please it's urgent," Xenia's voice came next and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

What could have happened for both of them to come so urgently?

I finally grabbed the doorknob and twisted it, letting them in. Both of their expressions dropped when they saw the state I was in and the state my room was in.

"Oh my God, what happened?" Kenna questioned as she held my arm and led me to my bed while Xenia switched on the dim light in the room. I let her lead me mainly because I was way too weak to fight back.

Oh, that's right, neither of them knew the truth about Angus's death yet.

"I have to tell you guys something," I blurted as Xenia sat on my other side. They both looked at me warily.

"We have to tell you something," Xenia said.

"No no, whatever it is. Mine comes first."

"Ace was arrested," Kenna said without warning.

My mind was suddenly a dice that couldn't stop rolling and my mouth let out a soft breath. My eyes squinted due to the way I was trying to control my emotions. How did that happen? What could have gone wrong? Was in pain at that moment? Was he feeling lonely?

"Why?" My breathy voice spoke and Kenna gave my hands a light squeeze.

"They found evidence that he was guilty of the attempted murder of his grandfather," she said with so much venom in her voice that I knew that she didn't agree with their investigation.

So did I. There was no way Ace did that. Ace would never try to kill anyone, he wasn't his family. As soon as these thoughts ran through my head I realized that I was contradictory myself. I just said he would never try to kill anyone, he wasn't his family and yet I was blaming and hating him for something his family did when he wasn't aware of anything.

The tears drop down to my hands which I roughly twisted against each other trying to ease the pain in my heart.

"We had to let you know," Xenia added.

"Are you going to see him?" Kenna asked softly and I shook my head taking them both by surprise.

"What? Did you guys fight? Even if you did, this is serious Quinn he's being framed!" Xenia complained.

"There's something I have to tell you guys too," I sniffed and wiped my tears with the back of my hand.

They remained silent and ready to hear what I had to say. Little did they know.

"It's about Angus's death."

They stiffened beside me and I knew the rate of their heartbeats increased.

"What about Angus?" Xenia asked with a soft shaky voice and I drew in a deep breath preparing myself to say it out loud. It was tougher than I thought it would be.

"A few days ago, I met mum with Ace's parents and we got to talking... and I got to know that the accident wasn't actually an accident. They murdered him... Ace's grandfather murdered Angus." My heart fell to my feet and my soul tried to pick it back up to give me life but I refused to move my physical body. My life came crashing down again.

"What? What do you mean by that?" Xenia stuttered. Her grip on my arm tightened, I could feel her body shaking through our contact and I shut my eyes in pain. "Quinn, please tell me it's an expensive joke you just made. Tell me that my brother didn't get brutally murdered like that."

She sniffed and I felt her tear drop down to my arm. I immediately pulled her into a hug as she broke down.

"So that's why you don't want to go and see Ace. You hate him right now don't you?" Kenna's calm voice rang in the air.

Kenna was the opposite of Xenia, she didn't say a word while Xenia broke down and couldn't muster up the strength to hide her raw emotions. Kenna... Kenna was holding herself up and sucking her emotions in. The thought made my heart break more.

Kenna read me like an open book all the time.

The door was suddenly flung open and my mother stood on the opposite side. I slowly let Xenia go and my mother came closer. Xenia's face was puffy and red as the tears dripped down uncontrollably. Xenia was his baby even though they were closer in age. They were like twins. He protected her all the time and was the perfect example of a big brother, he would never let her go out with guys or get hurt by anyone. She was his princess and now he's her angel.

My mother slowly took my place with Xenia and took her out. Xenia's stuttering words of how it wasn't fair and her cries faded the further they walked away and the door shut.

I hesitantly turned to Kenna wondering how she was able to take this so calmly. She was the one who had Angus's heart.

"Answer me, Quinn," she spoke in a dry voice. But I saw the storm brewing in her dull blue eyes, she was holding so much in.

I nodded. "I can't be with Ace. His family, his family, they ruined mine. They took away Angus and yet I didn't know. I mixed with the enemy and gave them my heart." I bit my lip so hard I felt the metallic taste of blood slipping onto my tongue.

"How can you be so stupid." Her words went straight to my heart but the tone she said it was the same as which she does when talking about Angus. Gentle, calm, and tense.

"What?"

"Who's the enemy?"

"Them."

"Them? Them? Quinn, Ace is being accused of murder. We both know that's a fucking lie. You know it. So why are you putting him in the same hole as his family? When I heard about what he had been through... I felt pity for him. He had to stay with those monsters all alone. He's not like them, we both know he's nothing like them. You know it, so why are you hurting yourself by lying that you hate him too," she whispered as she claimed my hand.

The darkness in my eyes wavered as she stared into my soul, waking me up from the lie I was lying in. 

"They took our Angus Quinn. They stole our happiness and now you're willing to give them your new happiness. Don't you see it? They're taking what makes you happy again. They're taking Ace away from you again with this fucking lie. He's a good person... What do you think Angus would want?"

I shook my head, unable to bring out words due to the tears choking me.

"Angus would want you to be happy. He wouldn't want you to ruin your happiness because of them. You're letting them win again by doing this. Quinn, don't let them do this to you again." She softly wiped my tears with the back of her palm and raised my chin to her gaze. She smiled.

She smiled.

I couldn't believe how strong she was. I couldn't bring myself to deny her words. She was right. She was so right. Everything she said brought me back.

"You love him, Quinn."

I do. I do. I really do.

I nodded and she sniffed before pulling me in for a hug and I knew she was about to break.

"They took my love from me... please don't let them take yours."

Her words broke me and I held her so tight our bodies almost fused.

She urged me to go and meet him before it was too late. I hadn't showered or gotten up for three days but none of that mattered. I had to save Ace. I can't let Ace go. I can't let them ruin the life of another person I love. As I ran down the stairs in my mismatching slippers the tears wiped away with the wind. The moment I left the room, I knew Kenna had broken down. I knew she was probably letting it all out at that moment. But I also knew that she needed to be alone at that time, just like I did.

While breaking all the traffic rules, I sped as fast as I could to the police station with my heart beating rapidly against my rib cage. I tried to calm myself by taking deep breaths but it was all in vain. Nothing could calm my thoughts. The thought of us being unable to save him and him having to spend forever elsewhere for something he didn't do.

Kenna was right, he's the purest soul who doesn't deserve any of this. None of us did.

I ran out of the car with the key still in as I got to where Ace was. My thoughts raced through my head as the wind blew my hair in every direction. My body didn't react to the cold air even though all I was wearing was a sweater with old shorts.

"Where's Ace?!" I yelled at the first officer I saw once I got in while holding his clothes.

He looked at me like I was crazy and his eyes widened.

"Answer me!" I yelled again.

"Quinn?" I heard a familiar voice. My dad. I turned and saw him standing with his coat hanging in one hand.

"Dad!" I cried and ran to him.

"Where's Ace?" I asked him and his face fell. "You came to see him right? You're such a righteous person I knew I could count on you. I need to see him, there's no way he did it, Dad."

My dad looked at me with a heavy look on his face and his pupils trembled. "Quinn... he doesn't want anyone to see him."

My face paled. "What do you mean? It's me! It's Ace! He'll definitely want to see me!"

"Let's go home first, we'll talk then." He gently grabbed my arm and attempted to lead me outside but I stood still.

"Dad... is something wrong?" I questioned and he took a deep shaky breath.

"We need to talk at home. Me, you and your mother."

"Okay," I said. "After I see Ace and make sure he's okay."

"Quinn!" He burst out and suddenly widened his eyes like he was confused by his outburst. He looked up before taking a deep breath again and his blue eyes landed on my brown ones.

"Please let me see Ace," I pleaded with a trembling soft voice. I couldn't bring myself to speak full proper sentences again. I knew something was wrong. I knew something was going on but I just wanted to see Ace. I just wanted to hold him.

Just as my father continued about to talk, my eyes caught something and his voice withered away. The blonde hair I'd been dreaming about, I only caught his side profile but I could see the terror, sadness, and emptiness in his eyes. His eyes which were once alive were dead. My world stopped. Two policemen held him at each arm and they began to walk away from me.

I opened my mouth to call him but what came out was a weak huff. I tried again and it came out as a cry for help. They all stopped walking and my dad's eyes widened before he turned to where my gaze was facing. My whole body was in extreme pain looking at his back. My Ace.

"Ace, it's me," I breathed about to walk to meet him when his voice stopped me.

"Stop!" His harsh voice came. My eyes wavered waiting for his reason. "I'm not seeing anyone, please... leave."

My heart shattered into a million pieces and breaths of disbelief and pain left my lips. What? He doesn't want to see me? I stood there unable to move from the spot I was in until Ace said something to the men holding him and they all began to walk away until they turned to a corner and I saw a glimpse of him again but he didn't even bother to look back at me one last time. He disappeared.

I broke down and my legs gave up on me. My dad slowly carried me into his car. I couldn't fight again. I was way too weak.

"We'll talk when we get home," he breathed after minutes of me staring into space in disbelief.

I couldn't think of a reason for Ace's decision.

"Here." My father handed me a folded piece of paper and I immediately recognized the handwriting.

"He really loves you Quinn, that's one thing I know." My father said softly as I opened the letter and the tears I didn't know I still had began to blur my vision.

My dear Quinn,

You once asked me to tell you about myself. The little things I truly loved in life. I love it when it rains and we get to lay in bed together in each other's arms, I love the smell of coffee, I love the crunch of fallen leaves, I love hearing your laughs, I love that birthmark that's on your left hip, I love how you look at me with so much love when I kiss your forehead.

I love you truly with every part of me. You are the reason for my existence and the reason I'm still living. Even Shakespeare would spend years trying to find the words to describe the love between us and fail. Don't you ever think for a moment that I didn't consider your feelings before doing this. You're all I thought about.

I've thought about this from every perspective and this is the best decision I can make for everyone. Please don't cry over me or try to change what I've done. Please don't wait for me or carry the burden with you. I'm sorry for everything you've had to go through because of my family. You deserve so much better my Quinn. So don't waste your tears on me, move on, have a family, and have kids with someone who can love and appreciate you.

I became better for you because I didn't want to lose you but now I'm sorry but I have to let you go my love. My last request is for you my Quinn to forget about me.

My life without you has no meaning but knowing you'll be in a better place and getting what you deserve in life means more to me than anything else. That's all I want, please be happy.

~From me to you~

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Shitting tears rn.