Beyonces POV

I told my parents I was pregnant and they flipped! My mom was disappointed in herself for putting her work over her parenting while my dad was pissed that I had sexual interaction with a man.

Once I had the babies my mom gave up her job to be there for me and the babies. With an S! cus I was having twins, meanwhile my father grew angry and buried himself into his work.

One day he drugged me out my bed in the middle of the night and did some type of surgery on me? Long story short I grew a dick and became a total b*tch.

I was so angry at him for doing those procedures on me without my permission, my mom was also livid she divorced him. She tried taking full custody of me but the judge gave a mandatory split custody meaning i had to go see my dad or my mom would get fined, go to jail, or I would be in his fully custody.

So we cooperated but I hated going to his house! He was so mean to me and he abused me in every way. But what really f*cked me up was the way he spoke to me.

Flashback

"TAKE IT BEYONCE" he shoved pills in my face

"NO"

"I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DONT TAKE IT" he raised his hand indicating that he would slap me

"I DONT WANT TO PLEASEEE" I cried

"YOU HAVE TO! YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE YOURE F*CKING CRAZY"

"NOOO"

"YES YOU RUIN EVERYTHING! YOURE THE REASON WE HAVE TO FIND A MILLION DIFFERENT SCHOOLS, GO TO COURT, AND YOURE THE REASON WHY YOUR MOTHER LEFT ME"

"THATS NOT TRUE"

"SHUT THE F*CK UP!" He slapped me causing me to drop to the floor.

"YOURE NOTHING BUT A F*CKING LUNATIC CRAZY B*TCH!" He grabbed a bottle of alcohol and smashed it to my head.

If I wasn't suffering from brain damage then I sure am now.

"GET TF UP" he kicked me then forced the pills in my mouth. "WOULDNT HAVE TO TAKE THE SH*T IF YOU WERENT SO CRAZY"

"I'm not crazy"

"YES YOU ARE THATS ALL YOURE EVER BE"

"No" I cried lowly

"Do you know how embarrassing it is having a daughter who's crazy. You go around choking people and sh*t, screaming just being crazy! Why cant I just have normal daughter!" He threw more glass towards me.

"I'm sorry"

"You d*mn right you are"

I wish I was a normal girl.

Flashback over

Once I got into college I was a complete narcissist, misogynist, selfish, b*tch! I was tired of being hurt and abused so I became the abuser. And well that's how we got present f*cked up bey!

My twins grew of age where they had emotional and physical needs, I tried my best to provide that for them but there was always this sense of resentment. It wasn't them that I hated it was their impact.

Once I had them sh*t immediately went left and I always thought if I didn't have them. My parents would still be together, my father wouldn't hate me, I wouldn't get abused, I wouldn't be a drug addict, or a dealer, I would have a better job, T would still be my girlfriend and well I would be happy.

Since I had the twins it's been outburst after outburst and my father there egging me on. I nearly killed T and now she wants nothing to do with me. She's also pregnant and more kids do not seem like the best idea right now. After almost killing her my parents sent me to another institution, we all know how that went. But this time I couldn't get pregnant.

When i went back it felt like I was in prison, T surprisingly wrote me everyday telling me about the baby we decided to name her blue. She also promised me if I get my sh*t together I could maybe see her.

So for the fall semester I took college serious, got my bachelors degree in architecture, worked for a company and she let me see blue. Unlike my twins I instantly fell inlove with Blue, she was the sweetest thing and she calmed my soul.

It felt like I really earned her. My twins, Kalani and Khalil obviously felt a sense of neglection when they went with me to meet blue. But it's not like I intentionally tried it's just I couldn't bare to look at their eyes his eyes and feel their hands, it's like I'm experiencing their father raping me all over again.

I couldn't be around them for too long because the painful memories of their father and my father would swallow me whole. So my mother did all the things I wasn't. I still tried to somewhat interact but they were old enough to see the difference between them and blue.

Once T parents knew me and her were back speaking they moved her across the world and took full custody of Blue, my father thought it would be best and my mother just agreed.

I was so mad I just took all my things and moved to New York. I kept up with my work and took meds to keep sane I also searched for T and Blue but never found them. Over the years T reached out to me but she was different.

Blue was 6 now she still wouldn't let me see her but once she turn 8 I was allowed to visit her I couldn't take her tho. T got worse there were times I couldn't even recognize her. My sweet T was gone.

She even got with Iman weird a**. Before him, me and blue would FaceTime all the time and I would visit whenever but once he came around n*gga started acting like her daddy. Telling her when she can and cannot be on the phone, telling me what time I'm allowed to visit.

Flashback

I walked up to the door knocking on it. I blew my breath once Iman a** opened the door.

"This is not an inappropriate time to be here it is 8pm and Blue has school tomorrow"

"Well it takes 4 hours to get here and Blue is old enough to stay up past 8pm"

"Not in this household she's not"

"N*gga just let me see my daughter"

"No come back tomorrow"

"Mommy?!!" Blue peaked around his big a**. I smiled at her voice.

"Hii baby"

"Mommy!!" She was about to come jump on me til this n*gga pulled her back.

"Go upstairs" she looked at him then looked at me "NOW!"

She walked away with a sad look.

"N*gga don't be yelling at my daughter!"

"I can yell at my stepdaughter if I wa-"

Before he could finish I punched him in his mouth and we got into a full fight. Next thing I know police are putting me in handcuffs and blue is crying for me while T is giving me a disappointed look.

I went to jail for 2/3 years then Kelly came to my rescue. She gave me a place to stay and a new firm to work at, she was clearly pissed at me and disappointed so we didn't speak much.

Soon I had to go to court because of how visiting blue went. The judge said I didn't change so I'm not allowed to see Blue at all except for phone calls.

At this point everyone was fed up with me. My parents, Kelly, Michelle, T, the twins, h*ll even the judge.

Flashback over

So after that I chilled out I ended up burying myself into my work because that seems to be the only thing that's not fed up with me. Then I met Onika and my antics started again. With all this going on I forgot about the twins.