Chapter Fourteen

I'm only out for a few hours, the doctor didn't give me a lot of sedatives because of the already fragile state my body was in. So, by the early afternoon I am awake again. The doctor, and my parents who stop by, force me to drink almost two litres of water before pushing food in front of my nose with threats if I didn't eat it. I manage all the liquid, but only manage three quarters of my food before throwing up. My body has been pushed past the limits of what it can handle.

I let this get too far out of hand.

After the nurses clean my plates away, a knock comes on my bedroom door. "Yeah" I groan – my voice is still scratchy and low, my screaming fit had done nothing to ease my already red raw throat.

The door opens and in walks the man I am going to spend the rest of my life with. Flynn is dressed in jeans, a black t-shirt and a leather jacket. His hair is messy, as if he's ran his hand through it hundreds of times – but knowing Flynn, he has spend a while styling it to look like that. His eyes glisten as he looks at me.

"Hi Violet" he grins. Although he is smiling there is anxiety in his eyes.

"Hey Derek" I smile sadly, I lean back against the hospital bed and sigh. Flynn moves into the room, closing the door behind him. He perches on the edge of the hospital bed and looks at me with glistening eyes. "You look like you're going to cry" I tease him.

"I can't promise I'm not going to".

I reach out and take one of his hands in mine – his warmth sends soft pulses of electricity over my skin reminding me what it truly feels like to be with one of my mates. No, I can't think like that anymore. Flynn is my mate, my only mate.

"I love you" I tell him honestly, "I'm sorry I scared you".

"Scare me?" he 'pfft' in fake nonchalance, "nah, I knew you'd come back. I knew you couldn't survive much longer without telling me to shut up".

I smirk softly, "you did talk an awful lot".

"A lot to say without saying anything. It's a useless talent but it is a talent" he grins. The initial anxiety in his eyes is dimming, but still present. It doesn't take him long to say what he really wants to. "Alpha Jackson told me that your other mate left...not the Beta one but the other one".

"Yeah" I mutter sadly, glancing down at our intertwined hands. "I was so worried about having to pick out of the three of you...it kept me awake at night. But, little did I know I just had to hold on and two of them would reject me instead". My eyes blur as I try and control the unshed tears.

"I'll never leave you" Flynn smiles, reaching up and cupping my cheek. I lean into him – noticing how my face fits perfectly into his hold.

"Nick and Arturo promised the same thing...yet here we are".

"The difference is that I fucking mean it! I am still here and I will always be here". He leans forward and kisses me softly. His lips remind me what it is to be loved and what it is to have a mate. The kiss chases some of the darkness away, filling me with warmth and contentment.

Flynn breaks the kiss after a few seconds. "I just have to know one thing, Violet, and I need you to be honest with me".

"I owe you that".

"If they hadn't left, your other mates, would have chosen me? Or would you have chosen one of them?"

I was silent for a second, considering my answer. "Honestly? I have no fucking clue. I wish I could tell you that it had always been you, but it hadn't. But, it had also never been the others either. I don't know which way I would have chosen".

Flynn nods softly, "I understand. Thank you". He pecks my lips once more.

I had told him the truth. Consciously I had not chosen a mate, but subconsciously I yearned for a man who wasn't in front of me.

***

I spent a couple more days in hospital, gaining my strength back up after almost a month of self-starvation and neglect. After that, it takes me almost another month of home recovery to get back to the point where my body is healthy – my periods have returned, my bones are no longer protruding, my ribs are no longer visible and I can walk a distance without having to stop for breaks. I am no where close to what I was before this whole mate-ordeal started, but I am getting there.

"Hey, good, you're up" a familiar voice comments, as I walk into the kitchen of my parent's house.

"I have insomnia. I'm always up" I reply dryly.

My father sighs heavily, but doesn't rise to my disrespect. "Flynn told me that you're having second thoughts about your trip?"

I grab two pieces of bread and shove them in the toaster, glance at my thin wiry figure in the distorted reflection of the oven, and stick another two slices in. I stretch out the silence as I grab the butter and jam from the fridge. My father watches me patiently from his seat at the kitchen's island.

"I never said I was having seconds thoughts" I finally admit. Tonight, Flynn and I are officially leaving the Pack, we've got tickets on a one-way flight to Thailand. We've told everyone it's a gap year, but in reality, we're not sure if we're coming back.

"It'll be good for you, Athena, getting away from the Pack and all the horrors you've seen this year" my father replies.

I consider my next words carefully, "I never told Flynn I didn't want to go. I just...I guess I'm less enthusiastic about it the more it becomes real. It always seemed such a faraway dream, yet here we are, packed and ready to go".

"The year will go quick and then you can return to the pack, with the ideals of settling down and having a family" my father nods. I think he is reassuring himself more than me. He seems to be the only one unsure if we'll return.

"Yes. A year is not a long time in the grand scheme of things" I smile, aiming to ease his tension slightly. "I love Flynn and he's my mate. The trip is going to be great". My toast pops up, so I turn my back on him and use the excuse of preparing and eating my breakfast to end the conversation.

I spend the day double checking my bags and making sure I have all the important things I need. I pause for a moment, sitting on my bed with my beloved camera in my hands. I hold it, picturing the first time I met Flynn. When the bastard stole my camera and I'd attacked him for it. I smile softly to myself at the memory.

Yes, life may have not taken the route I had expected. Yes, Flynn and I were going to have some hard times ahead of us. But I love him and I know he loves him. That is all we need. Each other and the love we share will be enough.

Tomorrow, in our first night in Thailand, Flynn and I will mate. I never imagined the first time with my mate would be in a foreign country, after the heartbreak that almost killed me. My anger for Arturo has melted away and I had even written him a letter, telling him I understood and wished him a lifetime of happiness. I am still hurt by his written rejection rather than getting any real closure, but I understand he had to do what was best for him. And, I was not best for him.

Nick, I don't think of. Not because I don't want to, but because it hurts too much. It hurts way too much; the pain raw and bleeding like an oozing wound. So, I don't allow a single thought of him to enter my mind. Nick is gone and I am letting his memory go to.

Flynn is my future and he is my mate. And, by this time tomorrow, I will have given him my virginity.