9/7/22
Another crackfic today, just like the others I will not be taking this seriously. If you're interested in more serious/non goofy writing tap out this story. Thank you to Lunaticwithpigtails on the COTC amino for helping a lot with the title.

On a beautiful and hot Friday afternoon after school Jason's front door busted open and two other scouts walked in. It was the first week of school and now kids would have a three day weekend. For once the scouts felt proud of themselves, surviving three days of being back to school and not a single day of a mental breakdown was something they'd pat themselves on the backs for. Now, they were rewarding themselves with a sleepover cause Jason's trashy step mom and dad were too busy to reward him themselves. But Jason doesn't need them they'll be only worth something when they're dead and hopefully Jason inherits all their stuff. (If not he shall sneak himself into the will).

But enough about that, now the scouts were throwing their backpacks by the door cause they'll be useless for a few days. Now the scouts were gonna find a random book to all read together since Boris and Tony finished all their books, Jason was sure he had at least one book to read together with them.  "Where's the book?"Tony asked walking up the stairs to Jason's bedroom "Where all my books are, wherever I can store them"Jason said.

The scouts searched Jason's bedroom like it was a police investigation, but all the books that were found were already finished. But on the bright side, Jason's room looked cleaner and more tidy. "Oh...Guys I think I finished all my books, but thankfully we can just buy books I have plenty of money"Jason said after searching his room "You guys have money too, right?".

Tony and Boris dig in their pockets, "Does 5 cents and a button count?"Boris asked "Tony, Boris search the living room couch, it steals lots of stuff, the remote, my phone at one point it definitely has money"Jason said then the scouts walked downstairs to the living room couch. But all they found were more cents, because sometimes they act like they don't have any. "Good enough"Jason shrugged, grabbed his house keys and walked to the book store with his friends. But by the time they looked at the books none filled their interest. Until, they found a round table of books labeled for middle schoolers. "Dang, middle schoolers get the good stuff"Tony mumbled picking up a horror book, "Scouts hit jack pot"Boris commented flipping through an action book.

"What genre do you guys feel like reading?"Jason asked not really getting any books yet "Mystery or literary fiction"Tony and Boris spoke. "Daring today are we?"Jason smirked then got the nearest fiction book to him on the round table, he turned it over for the price but cringed at the numbers. "Jason, you said you had money..."Tony said seeing Jason's expression of cringe "Um, I do just not enough..."Jason cringed panicking on the inside. "Guys, I know what we can do we can just read a little bit then put it back"Jason said then opening the book to the introduction.

Tony and Boris looked at each other, shrugged then all got together to read the book and besides introductions don't really take that long to read. "Ha, middle schoolers get the better books"Tony commented. But, the scouts ended up reading too far and were on the beginning of chapter 2.

"Hey, you kids this isn't a library!"The scouts heard a man yell that was now speed walking towards them. The scouts dropped the book and all ran out the book store "On all the other days to be broke it had to this one!"Jason mentally scolded himself while running with his friends expect for Tony who was speed crawling like a cockroach "Wanna go find the book for cheap another day?"Boris asked now walking back to Jason's house to continue the sleepover. The other two nodded.

Time Skip

Now, our beloved scouts were finally all sitting down on the couch watching a movie, Teen Wolf. Until, something caught Boris's eyes on the coffee table. He looked closer and saw the most terrifying bug he'd ever seen. There was an assassin bug but the poor scout babies didn't know that, I know they are scouts but for the love of this crackfic do not say a word about how they don't know what bug that is. "What is that?"Boris pointed out to his two friends who also looked at the dem- I mean...Insect.

Jason paused the movie and looked at the coffee table, "Oh my god what is that- OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT?!"Jason screeched in fear by the time the long ugly ass bug moved Tony was getting ready to steal a match and light the thing on fire. "That thing looks demonic!". "Boris, get me a shoe!"Jason screamed scooting back from the terrible bug terrorising the trio of boys, damn who does that.

Boris comes with back with the biggest shoe he could find to kill the stupid beast, Jason took the shoe and yeeted- Pardon me, threw the shoe. But the bug started flying weakly. "AHHHHHH!!!! OH MY GOD IT'S FLYYYNG! EWW"The three screamed in perfect unison (Just like them/j) "The demon is flying, screw it just go outside!"Jason demanded then opened the sliding door so the three could run out.

Now the scouts were in quite the dilemma, "There's a demon in my house...."Jason cringed watching the terrible terrorist bug flying all around the living room and the tv screen with their paused movie. "What bug is that?"Boris asked turning to Tony with his large book. But you reader are not allowed to question how that book came into Tony's hands when they were running for their lives from that bug in the living room. "Homies!!! I know what demon that is!"The redhead scout said pointing to a page in his book. "It's an assassin bug!".

"Bug gonna kill scouts?!"Boris said in worry, "Yes, Boris! Someone hired that bug to kill us!"Jason said in fear. "Forget it, house belongs to bug!!!!'Boris said (Poor baby) "BURN THE HOUSE DOWN!!!"Tony screamed "No! We are scouts we don't quit...Because I wanted to set the house on fire cause a bug was in it and got into big trouble...But anyways! The book says all the stuff to kill it, I have that stuff!"Jason said then the scouts snuck back inside the house through a window.

The scouts got the things to kill the bug and geared up. The assassin bug was climbing on the tv screen where the scouts were previously watching Teen Wolf. "Okay, homies...We have the target surrounded, It's time to go in for the kill...Be strong homies"Jason said as all three scouts tip toed closer and closer to the bug.

"We're back, you demon!"Tony yelled, "Say hello to my angels, ya demon!"Jason screeched getting out bug spray for the terrorist bug. The scouts got out their bug spray and almost sprayed the whole ass can at the bug. When Boris saw it was still moving a little, he took out his gloves fist and smashed his fist into the bug, killing the beast. "We did it, men..."Tony said staring blankly at the dead assassin bug who was now in the coffee table.

Time Skip

Now it was time for the friend group to head to sleep, just when Boris and Tony were in their sleeping bags, Jason walked towards them. "Good night, homies! And remember...."Jason spoke referring to what they always did before sleeping. "No homo :)"Jason, Boris and Tony said in unison "Good, you guys know I already like Craig"Jason said then leaned over to Boris and Tony's foreheads to lightly peak them of course no homo. "Mwah, good night homies!"Jason said then went into his sleeping bag and went to sleep totally not feeling gay for his friends cause he was only gay for Craiggy boy.