ReturnToShuichiIfFound: :3 Shumai bought me a pigeon

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: He's pecking me rn but we still cool

#1Mom: Why do I hear squawking from upstairs? Kokichi, you know it isn't Halloween yet right?

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: No! It's just Henry-Sama!

#1Mom: I don't recall an Ultimate named Henry. Is he new?

Ass ass in is now online

Ass ass in: no, it's a FUCKING PIGEON THAT WON'T SHUT UP

#1Mom: Why did you want a pigeon for?

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: Shuichi said I was being annoying so he gave me him as a gift

#1Mom: @IAmShuichi

IAmShuichi is now online

IAmShuichi: I didn't do it

#1Mom: Did you buy Kokichi a pigeon?

IAmShuichi: There is a 50 percent chance that I might have done it but most importantly I didn't do it

#1Mom: @Anxiety

Anxiety is now online

Anxiety: I'd hate to call you out Shuichi but you directly asked me which feathers look better on each of the 50 pigeon photos you showed me

#1Mom: Shuichi?

IAmShuichi: There is a 99.9 percent chance that I might have done it but most importantly you can't prove it.

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: You didn't read my earlier texts? I am hurt :(

IAmShuichi: ...

IAmShuichi: Okay I did it

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: Thank you for giving me my 17th minion for my army of darkness 😝😝😂😂

#1Mom: seven...teenth?

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: AHHHHHH, GUCCI SAN!

Anxiety: It is your fault for buying the pigeons, not me

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: AHHHHHH, MAKI SAMA!

Ass assin: Good luck with that, cya

Ass assin is now offline

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: Oof Buggy-kun just got out and Wanderer-kun and Stabby-Chan... I should probably do something

AnxietyDeluxe is now online

AnxietyDeluxe: a pigeon just attacked me, wtf

Cosplayed and 10 others are now online

Cosplayed: WHO THE FUCK WENT INTO MY CLOSET TO SHIT ALL OVER MY SHRITS?

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: That was probably Supreme-kun, sorry!

GodIsAliveAndItsMyFault: Who mixed all of my paint together?

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: That was definitely Heaven-Chan!

#1Mom: If I see any more complaints from anyone else, I'll literally disown you.

AnxietyDeluxe: HALF OF THE PIGEONS ARE ATTACKING ME, SOMEONE GET GUNDAM-SAMA.

InnocentAndPrecious: But the pigeons like Gonta? Are the pigeons hurting friends?

Cosplayed: That's an f to my heart omg

#1Mom: Can you get Gundam from class 78 to help wrangle in the pigeons?

InnocentAndPrecious: Okay Mom!

InnocentAndPrecious is now offline

#1Mom: Kokichi, you have been disowned. Shuichi, I'll let you off on a warning because Gonta warmed my heart a little bit.

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: You said you were going to disown me anyway!

#1Mom: And if you argue with me any longer I'll throw out your mini fridge.

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: But moooooooooooooooooom...!

Anxiety: Just be lucky you're just dealing with Kirumi San. If I was a father figure I would've punted you already

AnxietyDeluxe changed Anxiety's nickname to EmotionalFather

EmotionalFather: By indisputable decree, you are all my children now. Kokichi come here

ReturnToShuichiIfFound: I HEAR HELPDBDJISKLXMMClKBhahiaKjiwkskl? '' 5)3

ReturnToShuichiIfFound is now offline

AnxietyDeluxe: Isnt your best friend being a vent crawling, emotionally unstable, mysterious, responsible, just amazing person in general just the best?

IAmShuichi: But he just murked Kokichi

AnxietyDeluxe: Isnt your best friend being a vent crawling, emotionally unstable, mysterious, responsible, just amazing person in general just the best?

Kokichi has 17 pigeon friends and honestly, this is the most accurate headcannon I have compared to everyone else.