third person

the following days passed in a blur, blending into each other with the same pressed grey fog filling them and erasing a clear concept of the social construct of time.

the field trip had come and gone, passed by in what was the blink of blissful eye to some, but to others was an unforgettable number of days that revealed much more than anyone wanted, the trip leaving a much darker scar in some hearts than the easy going relief in other's.

in these following days, nothing and  everything seemed to fill the clouded hours, the hours that dragged like days and felt like years.

to wooyoung especially, who succumbed to his own misery and spoke little, opening his mouth only to swallow a dry mouthful of food here and there washed down with caffeine to keep him functioning. he was disgusted with himself, hating what he had done and who he had hurt, the boy who was so wrong, because he meant everything to him. even though wooyoung hadn't said it.

the furthest from nothing he had ever felt. if only he could find some way to tell him, to tell san everything he felt.

but he couldn't bring himself to. wooyoung kept going back to those words that couldn't be erased from his memory if he got amnesia (although, he wished he would, so he could forget what was said and done). perhaps he truly wasn't capable of loving someone.

someone like him didn't deserve san. he wasn't sure he knew the difference between emotions he felt anymore, unable to see past the blurred lines that made him believe love and addiction were the same thing. there was such a small difference between the two, though, wooyoung believed he had closed his eyes and accepted them as one in the same.

so no, san didn't deserve someone who hurt him and made him feel so  unhappy to the point that he was probably drowning six feet in under.

so again, no. wooyoung would not try to mend this broken trust he created. he would stop, if it meant san could be happy without him. he'd do anything for him.

san, however, broken and defeated had once again fallen to old habits, locking himself in his room and not talking to anyone who dared knock. sleep was a foreign word, and the taller could only believe that everything wooyoung said in the video was true.

he was good for nothing. no wanted wanted him. so they were as bad as each other, staying far away from the other boy as they could because each believed they didn't deserve one another, both destroying themselves without caring a good deal about the consequences.

hyunjin had done possibly the most notable thing by siding with wooyoung, realising he had to stand with the boy he'd known most of his life rather than abandon him for someone he'd known well for only weeks.

call him wrong, or stupid, but hyunjin had a good heart. and it drove him to not walk away from wooyoung without a full explanation.

he knew first-hand how wooyoung used to be before meeting san and getting his shit together, so he also knew very well how much the male had changed and become so much more than the damaged addict of an asshole who spoke those words they all saw on the video.

jeongin, who could only blame himself, stopped seeing any of them for a while. although he didn't send the video, he knew who did, and regretted more than anything letting it happen.

since yeosang and yunho had known the gist of the video, san refused to speak to them, feeling utterly betrayed by everyone he thought he trusted.

within the immaculate choi household, san lay on his side atop the sheets of his own bed, shiber clutched in his arms as consistent tear droplets beaded his sunken eyes.

"you should eat something," advised the gentle voice of his step brother in the doorway.

san weakly shook his head, not willing to raise himself from the spot he had barely moved from, the surrounding bedsheets becoming an increasingly alluring black hole, sucking him inwards and begging him not to leave.

"you also have to go back to school eventually." jongho continued, striding into the room and opening the shut curtains to allow some light into the depressing room.

when he received no reply, jongho tsked in an unimpressed manor, coming to sit on the very edge of the bed. "i know what will cheer you up."

he announced, trying to look positive when really he was brimming with concern for his adoptive brother. "i punched wooyoung in the face today."

san stifled a small laugh, the gesture panging his chest. "i thought you were friends?" was the quiet answer, voice hoarse from crying.

"we were." jongho agreed, propping his chin on a hand and pretending to look thoughtful. "then he hurt you."

san offered an apologetic smile, sitting up slowly in the bed, despising how much of a burden he felt. "sorry." he whispered almost inaudibly.

"i hate seeing you like this," jongho burst out more seriously. "i hate seeing the impact of whatever he did to you. if i see that dickhead ass again-"

"it's okay." san assured him, placing a calming hand on his step brother's wrist. "i'll punch him for both of us."

jongho laughed, elated to see a little spark in the other's deadened eyes. "let's go make you some waffles."

to which he was offered another smile, more genuine this time, and the exhale of a long since held breath as san swung his legs slowly from the captivity of his bed.

while this small inch of progress was occurring, wooyoung was set on a different, hell bent mission of his own.

sitting with hongjoong, he chewed his pencil maniacally, fingers tapping unsteady beats on the table top as his enlarged pupils studied the so far blank paper in front of him.

"i need to found out everyone who was at that party," he rambled insistently, "whoever sent that video had to have been there."

hongjoong raised his brows, taking the cigarette to his lips and inhaling deeply before releasing a lazy cloud of smoke. "maybe not, woo. i'm the one who took it, and it got sent around a bit, so..."

wooyoung dug his nails into the paper in frustration, clawing to crumple it to a mangled ball, before flipping the table in anger.

"i need to know." he growled, flexing his fingers and not even noticing what he had just done.

"woah, woo. calm down, dude!" hongjoong consoled him unconvincingly. "when's the last time you ate?"

wooyoung waved a dismissive hand as if it didn't matter massively, running the other through his outgrown hair. "i don't need food. i'm running on black coffee and whatever pills you gave me."

"you don't even like black-"

"shut up joong, it reminds me of this time... he... bought it for me on purpose."

"okay, you're more screwed up than i thought. what happened to your eye, by the way?" hongjoong changed the subject, examining the angry purple skin he voiced about.

"his brother gave it to me." wooyoung shrugged, a frown befalling his uncertain features. "dude can seriously throw a punch."

a moment of quiet acknowledgement passed, before wooyoung fixed the table and sat down again, tapping his fingers obsessively.

"back to the video thing." he brought up, looking up at his older friend with persistent eyes.

"okay..." hongjoong began thoughtfully. "is there anyone you know who'd like to sabotage your relationship?"

wooyoung rolled his eyes, heaving a sigh. "only everyone ever." he muttered, before suddenly sitting up insanely fast as his eyes clouded over. "but there is this one bitch who stands out more than others. lee felix?"

the two continued to discuss possibilities, neither acknowledging that wooyoung's fixation was simply a distraction from the tornado of enclosing destruction threatening to suck him in if he didn't find nothings to busy himself with.

when the two's argument amounted to little, it seemed that they were back at square one, along with san who although decided to go back to school next week, was throwing up the waffles jongho watched him hungrily devour, afraid to make himself any more detestable than he already believe himself to be.

there were people, however, who needed the two to make up before it got so out of hand it killed them both.

"this can't go on." hyunjin spoke worriedly, pacing up and down kang yeosang's dorm room.

"i've seen him like this before," yeosang agreed, talking about san. "i can't let it get bad again."

"i know you may not believe me right now," hyunjin countered, looking in the smaller boy in the eyes softly. "but wooyoung's actually a good guy. and they need each other."

yeosang clenched his jaw, but couldn't deny it. "how are we supposed to get san to believe that, huh?"

"i don't know." hyunjin confessed, placing his head in his hands and momentarily stopping his pacing. "i followed wooyoung out that bathroom instead of san because i knew he needed a friend who had seen him in his ugliest times. but that doesn't mean i don't care about san. we have a mutual interest here to protect him. so maybe... you could advise him?"

yeosang was already shaking his head. "he won't listen to me. i knew about the video and my dumbass listened to yunho instead of going with my instincts. i didn't tell him even when i could've."

"so," hyunjin concluded, playing with his fingers as he devised a plan. "what we need is someone san trusts. who didn't know about the video."

yeosang raised his eyebrows as if the choice was starkly obvious. "sounds like you, mate."

"no," hyunjin waved his hands in rejection. "he won't trust me after i sided with wooyoung."

yeosang thought for a moment. "felix. he didn't know about the video, and he and san have a- special connection."

"alright." hyunjin sighed. "as long as we clear this up, and everyone goes home happy."

"aish," he added in slight annoyance, perking the ears of the other male. "wooyoung's so obsessed with finding out who sent the damn video. i'll just text jeongin and ask him myself."

yeosang bit his lip, cocking his head slightly. "is that a good idea? what if he doesn't like the answer?"

"as long as it satisfies him." hyunjin muttered, fingers already on the keys. "you call felix. we're saving our friends from themselves."

if only they knew what that phone call would do.

-

kinda a sad filler type thing

y'all freaked out so much over last chapter i pissed myself reading the comments lmao

congrats to those who guessed it right, and if you didn't dw bub i confuse me too

jihyo and daniel? damn my gf cheated on me with mark's man what goes on

((srsly though i wish them all the best <3

xxx