harlee's pov:
ethan's party; 11 pm

just try it, just try it." ethan held the cup out across the couch towards me with an uneven smile across his lips—his face being droopy from his drunk state.

my eyes shifted to javon, hoping that he'd tell me not to drink it, but he looked just as entertained as ethan.

just not drunk.

for the twins to have the reputation and friends they have it's quite shocking to never see them have a drop of alcohol.

an annoyed scoff left my mouth as my eyes rolled, taking the red plastic cup into my hand.

there is not part of me that wants to drink pure vodka. I've been drunk only a couple times and it was years ago.

I wasn't expecting the alcohol offered here to be hard liquor, I thought it would be something more light like beer.

my eyebrows furrowed as my eyes looked into the cup, feeling my taste buds sizzle; knowing this was about to be spicy and disgusting.

I placed the rim of the cup to my lips, tilting the cup backwards a bit as I let the harsh alcohol fall onto my taste buds.

without letting it sit in my mouth for long, I let the drink slip down my throat quickly, trying not to taste it as much as possible.

I took the cup away from my mouth, letting my eyes squint from the burn that was dripping down the side of my throat.

"holy shit." my voice cracked from the heat burning on the inside of my throat. "that was fucking disgusting." I held the cup out towards ethan, making him take it away from me.

ethan shook his head, gently laughing. "you took that like a champ." he assured me, clapping his hands together.

a forced laugh escaped my mouth as I looked back to javon.

he was chuckling under his breath being too focused on his game of beer pong.

he stood at the edge of the counter, focusing on his shot as he threw the white ping pong ball—making it into the center cup.

my eyes looked him up and down a couple of times, finding myself to be extremely attracted to the current outfit that he was wearing.

he had a white beanie over his hair, over his arms he wore a black nike hoodie—putting the hood on over his beanie. he had a pair of black joggers on, and panda dunks covering his feet.

I inhaled a deep breath to contain myself from how good he looked, the smoothest smile being on his face.

my lips rubbed together as I looked back down to the coffee table in front of me. my eyes scattered around all of the different types of alcohol on top of it, feeling my body shiver from the thought of how gross it would taste.

"are you and wanna staying the night?" he questioned, turning his full attention back to me.

I shrugged my shoulders because I didn't know that anyone was staying the night, I was lucky my mom even agreed to let me stay out tonight.

I looked around at all of the people that were across ethan's house. "how many people are you planning to have?"

"just the people who were over at the twins house earlier, everyone else is going to have to leave." he chuckled to himself, basically assuring me that there would be no one but the group from earlier today.

my eyebrows raised a bit, having no idea about this plan, "was javon planning on staying?"

"I think he was." ethan shrugged his shoulders before taking a sip from his red solo cup.

"where are we all going to sleep?" one of my eyebrows raised being in confusion as a smile stayed on my lips.

"girls in the upstairs living room, and we'll all just hang out down here."  he said pointing his finger at the staircase.

my head shook as my eyes looked to the stairs, "I guess I'll stay." I simply told him.

"let klai know too." he spoke a little overly excited, his eyes widened as he smiled.

"you're parents are perfectly fine with all these people at your house for the night?" my eyebrow raised at the idea that his parents were no where to be seen.

"I mean," ethan's eyebrows lowered as his jaw dropped, "I told them people were staying the night but I didn't tell them about the party, but it's fine they're out for dinner with some friends." he placed his hand over his chest like he was relieved.

my eyes rolled at him as I laughed at his words. I looked back over to javon who seemed to be enjoying himself still winning his name of beer pong.

"do you know if kennedy and jaden are here yet?" I rose my voice trying to speak over the music that was blaring throughout the house.

a crowd of people in the kitchen began to cheer, immediately taking ethan's attention away from me.

"I mean they could be but I'm not positive, I'll text and see." his head was turned toward the kitchen trying to take a look at the scene.

my eyes landed on sidney walking into the front door with two plastic cups in her hands.

she had a wide smile on her face while a couple of people greeted her as she walked towards the kitchen.

my eyes instinctively looked to javon like I wasn't even in control, my body automatically wanting to see how he reacted to her walking in.

he was still standing near the beer pong table, holding one of the white round ping pong balls in his hand as he glanced over to her direction.

it was almost like sidney's appearance made the game pause, causing everyone to become distracted. all the boys at the game table looked over at her before the next person finally resumed playing.

she walked into the kitchen, still with a wide smile on her face.

"fuck yes!" one of the boys shouted loudly as both as his hands grabbed onto his teammates shoulders, squeezing them as excitement filled inside him.

javon laughed deeply from the other side of the table bringing the rim of a cup to meet his lips.

his eyes widened as he looked down to the table, saying something but I was too far away to hear or read his lips.

they continued to talk for a few seconds about whatever it was he had said to him, then his hand pointed over to my direction, almost looking like they could be talking about ethan or I.

he shrugged his shoulders, nodding her head as the boy answered him.

"set it back up, new teams!" one of the boys insisted everyone as he pointed to all of the red cups, signaling everyone to restart.

my jaw clenched as I turned away from the the game table, sitting back into my spot that was straight forward.

"I've gotta go piss," ethan stood up from the couch, adjusting the bottom of his shirt as he did so. "want to go see if jaden and kennedy are here?"

"okay tmi ethan." I exhaled a large breath as I nodded my head. "I'll come though."

my hands pushed off my knees, helping me fully stand up as I started to trail behind ethan as he walked up the stairs.

"if anything jaden would be in my room doing god knows that." ethan warned me as he walked in front of me, then putting his drink to his mouth to take a sip.

I laughed to myself from ethan's humors vibe he constantly gives off, it's like he never sees the negative in life.

my hand grabbed onto the railing, but I hesitated slightly, looking over my shoulder back to the living room.

javon's arms were crossed at his chest as he gazed over into the kitchen.

my teeth pressed together tightly as I shook my head, rolling my eyes only slightly—feeling like I disappointed.

somewhat expecting it.

I turned back around, following behind ethan as we walked down the hallway to his bedroom.

once we reached the door, he knocked on the door, "yo jaden, are you in there?" his voice spoke over the music.

he twisted the doorknob turning the lights on, revealing no one in the bedroom.

"oh shit, I thought he'd be in here." ethan cringed furrowing his eyebrows. "I still got to piss but I'll wait." he said to me before turning on his heel and starting his way out of the door.

it stayed quiet for a couple of seconds as I kept my thoughts to myself, but ethan's voice gained my attention as he stopped in the doorway

"what's got you in such a down mood?" he question as his head turned in my direction. "it's prom night and you just seem so out of it, and not because you're drunk."

I looked up to him when he asked, then I shrugged my shoulders as I started walking closer to where he stood. "it's just been a confusing night." I admit as I laughed a bit.

"do you want to talk about it?" his deepened voice asked, sounding concerned.

my lips pursed together as I turned to look at him laying next to me. I thought to myself, not being sure if I should make my problem into his.

after thinking for a while, I asked him anyways not really caring if I came on too strong. "does javon ever talk about me?"

I know from to ethan's point of view that I sound clingy, or like I'm obsessed with wanna, but it's difficult when there's positive and negative sides right in front of you.

he hardly shrugged his shoulders as he kept his eyes on me. "yeah." he answered plainly, having no emotion to give off any hints of positivity or negativity.

my heart jumped, feeling a slight relief from the fact that javon talks about me to his friends. there was something holding ethan back though, like he didn't know if he should keep talking. "about what though?" I asked.

his head stayed in my direction, but his eyes shifted downwards as he thought to him. his eyebrows furrowed, not being sure what to say.

"I feel like it's not my place to repeat anything that comes out of his mouth." he spoke as if he were trying to let me down easy. "it's nothing bad he says about you."

I nodded my head, tucking my lips inwards as they rubbed together.

"Im sorry, I would just feel so guilty if I went back and repeated something wanna trusted me with." he apologized to me.

I shook my head at him, "don't apologize. you're being a good friend, ethan." I laughed lightly not wanting him to feel bad.

"just know he cares too much for you, to hurt you." he reassured me giving me a light smile.

I kept a smile on my face to make sure he wouldn't feel bad, but my stomach was over flowing with nerves, having no idea what wanna talks about to his friends.

he nodded, letting the corner of his mouth curve upwards. he turned his body to face back to the door, and just as he did so klai appeared in the door frame.

"I saw you guys come up here, I've been looking for you harlee." she said taking a few steps past ethan towards me.

"yeah we came up here to see where jaden and kennedy were." ethan said slightly shrugging his shoulders.

klai bit her bottom lip looking towards the stair case, "they're downstairs I saw them just a second ago."

ethan nodded his head as he turned around and started walking down the stairs, just klai and I in the hallway now.

"don't tell me you're upset about what I told you earlier?" her voice whispered bluntly out of no where, catching me completely off guard as we followed behind ethan.

I turned around to face her, seeing her facial expression looking at me with slight concern.

"you've been acting like you're on the edge of your seat about to break but not saying anything since I told you." klai simply told me with no empathy.

I looked away from her, crossing my arms as if I were trying to keep myself warm as I looked back out of the window. "I'm fine klai." I spoke in a low tone, not wanting to create a problem.

a scoff left her mouth as she lightly nudged me in the side, letting me know it was oblivious I wasn't fine.

I could feel her eyes on me as if she were reading the lies that I was laying out in front of her. but I kept my attention down to the stairs, acting as if I could see him looking at me.

once we got to the bottom of the staircase she broke the silence between us. "you don't have to lie to me." she told me plainly, knowing that I was hiding something from her. "I can tell you're bothered."

I exhaled a breath out of my nose as I closed my eyes, then opening them once all the air was gone. I just don't understand why the moment sidney got here my mood shifted.

"I really don't want to start a problem." I admit, keeping my eyes on floor beneath me. "but, why does something just feel so off?" I asked as I turned my attention onto javon who was still at the beer pong table.

her eyebrows narrowed, giving me a look of confusion as we went to take a seat on the couch. "what do you mean?" she asked as her voice laced with concern.

I bit onto my bottom lip as I thought how to make this sound as least clingy as possible. "ever since you mentioned sidney something just felt so off, maybe it's just me overthinking." my voice was hesitant, knowing I sounded harsh.

both of klai's eyebrows raised as she crossed her arms over her chest, then leaning back onto the couch. "harlee I didn't want you to be overthinking this, I just wanted to let you know what I heard. which most likely is not true."

I shrugged my shoulders as I looked away, "I know and I tried not to but I just feel like there's so many signs."

"stop worrying and let's just enjoy ourselves." klai explained to me throughly as she picked up two cans of bud lights—handing one to me.

both of my eyebrows raised as I unfolded my arms from each other, looking over at her. "okay." I mumbled, being a little on edge still.

"c'mon." klai fussed at me as she popped open the lid. "it's prom night."

I shook my head, as I copied her actions by opening the lid. "are you planning on staying the night, ethan said he invited everyone that was at the twins house earlier."

"if you stay I stay." her shoulders shrugged, brining the can to reach her lips.

I could feel myself finally smile slowly for the first time tonight, as I nodded my head.

"what are you guys doing?" javon's deepened voice laced with confusion, as he took a seat next to me on the couch.

my head turned towards the him seeing a small smirk plastered on his face.

I placed my drink on the floor next to my feet before answering him, "just talking about the night." I   exhaled a large breath as he looked to klai.

"are you having fun?" javon still sounded on somewhat confused.

I saw klai slyly roll her eyes out of the corner of my eyes as she took another sip of her drink.

I rubbed my lips together as I turned towards him slowly. "yeah, how was beer pong?" I asked him with a light voice.

he shrugged his shoulders, not caring about the topic that I had just brought up. "we won, but I left the game they're playing right now." his voice was plain.

I nodded my head, looking away from him. I bit onto the inside of my cheek, not knowing what else to say.

I was unintentionally creating an uneasy tension between us, for a reason that I don't know of, but I know that we could both feel it. it was almost as if it were the air inside of this room.

"are you good?" he asked as both of his eyebrows furrowed, a small amount of concern lacing in his voice.

I looked down to my feet, not wanting to hold an eye contact with him for too long. "tonight's just been a lot." I admit as I let out a large breath of air through my mouth.

don't create problems harlee.

"babe," he scooted a little closer to me. "what's wrong?" his voice was suddenly soft, his head tilting slightly as he tried to see my eyes due to me looking down.

I looked back up to him, putting a fake smile over my lips. "uhm," my hand grabbed onto his. "let's just have fun." I told him, not wanting to ruin prom night with drama.

I started reaching towards my drink, but quickly felt my arm pull causing me to stop.

I sat back up to face him, seeing that he wasn't moving a single inch. he gave me a certain look as if he knew something was up, and we weren't leaving until I tell him.

klai lightly tapped my leg and pointed her head over to the kitchen as she got up and started walking that way.

"harlee, what's wrong?" his voice was stern as his intimidating eyes stared at me.

I looked at him trying to hear myself think over the music. I let my eyes travel to each of the details of his face. I could slowly feel my heart start to feel hurt at the thought of him still messing around with sidney.

my eyebrows furrowed from the emotions running inside of me. "why don't you drink?" my voice came out weaker than expected.

even though that wasn't what really was on my mind.

his stern facial expressions slowly loosened after hearing my question, almost like he wasn't expecting it.

he looked down to the floor as he licked the inside of his cheek. after a couple of seconds of comprehending the conversation that was about to go down, he looked back up to me. "I told you I just don't like being vulnerable, and in the past I was."

I let let my back lean against the couch, feeling myself become more unsure about everything. "alright and what about sidney?" I questioned due to the fact that he was just eyeing her earlier.

he raised an eyebrow at me, giving me a look as if I were clueless. "what about sidney?" he spoke as if it were a question, confused on what I was trying to get at.

my eyebrows raised quickly up then down, knowing that even if he is lying, I wasn't going to get anything out of him.

"I overheard her saying you two were meeting up somewhere tonight." my voice threaded with sadness, as his eyes stayed on me.

"harlee, do you actually believe that? you actually believe I would do that to you?" he asked sounding offended.

"my gut believes you, but my head feels like it's never getting a break from the different signals and signs." my voice came out strong, blurting it out as if I had been keeping it inside.

he blinked a couple times, again looking at me with a look of distraught. "whats that supposed to mean?" he questioned.

I looked away from him as I thought to myself. my head turned back to him, studying him for a second knowing that I don't even think I was ready to hear the answer to this question. "do you or did you ever have feelings for sidney?"

both of his eyebrows raised high as he looked at me with shock. "what?"

I shrugged my shoulders, wanting to hear him answer instead of try and guilt me for thinking that he might. "do you or did you ever?"

"you're seriously asking me about her?" he kept one of his eyebrows lifted high out of disbelief.

"javon." my voice was demanding, now taking charge in this conversation. "do you or did you have feelings for her?"

a scoff left his mouth as he looked at me in complete disappointment. "no, I don't." he shook his head as his eyes stayed pinned on me. "I don't know how else to prove it to you either. I've been so loyal to you, and you still don't trust me."

"do not turn this on to me." I told him as a demand, knowing I have a right to think he could still be talking  to her.

"I'm not." he strongly defended himself. "I'm just saying it's annoying when I try so hard for you, yet you think I like other people." his voice mixed with annoyance as if he had failed at something.

my eyes widened as I felt myself grow annoyed, "because you still hide things from me until I find out from other people." I told him as if it were obvious.

"because those things don't matter anymore, so it's pointless to tell you about them." he squinted his eyes at me slightly, not seeing a problem with it.

my jaw clenched tightly as I looked down, no longer saying anything else. my thoughts stayed inside my head, not saying anything out loud.

unexpectedly, his hand gently grabbed onto mine causing an instant warmth to swarm my entire body. "I wouldn't do any of the shit I do for you if I had feelings for other girls."

my eyes stayed down, looking to his hand holding onto mine. his opposite hand gently touched the bottom of my chin, lifting my head to look up to him. "I want you to believe that." he spoke softly. "I need you to believe that."

my eyes stayed on his face as my head slowly started to nod, "okay." I told him in almost a mumble.

without saying anything, he pulled my hand towards him, causing my arms to wrap around his waist as his held onto me.

"I don't want you to have second doubts about us." his voice mumbled into my shoulder as he hugged me tightly.

I exhaled a large breath as I didn't say anything else, trying my absolute best to believe him.

wanting to believe him.

———
2:00 am

my eyes were hardly open, both of my hands were resting in my lap. while my head rested on javon's shoulder, about to fall asleep.

for the most part the party died down and it was only a few people scattered about the house.

I lifted my head from javon's shoulder catching his attention as I grabbed the cup of water that I had filled a couple hours ago from off the floor next to me. I lifted it to my lips, letting myself swallow the refreshing cold water.

as I took it away from my mouth, my eyes traveled to javon who was looking down at me with his lips curved upwards.

kennedy and jaden were sitting on the opposite couch, kennedy looking like she was about to fall asleep too. everyone in the room looking like they've had a long night.

if I'm being completely honest, I can hardly remember what happened tonight from start to finish.

the only parts I remember are pretty much a blur considering that I never really drink and am a light weight.

I do remember javon and I playing beer pong together and we won even though he was the one making it in all of the cups. he was also smack talking ethan and brandon the whole time, and I'm not gonna lie... his cockiness was kinda hot.

of course that's one of the only things I remember.

I remember brandon saying sidney offered to help him when he announced that he over drank and would likely throw up.

I remember my makeup feeling like it was drying up my face, and how bad I wanted to take it off. jaden offered to take it off for me since I was so out of it, and we went into the bathroom and he sat me down onto the bed as he got a wet rag and helped me take it off.

I also can remember a guy and his girlfriend showing up, I don't remember what they looked like, but ethan got pissed because they weren't invited. his anger issues started to show and it got really ugly.

realizing that I was so tired that I could fall asleep on this couch right now, I slowly tried to make my exit, feeling myself fall over by just sitting up straight.

only the sound of light music and voices still playing throughout the house.

not that many people could still be here.

my mind reminisced on earlier tonight when ethan showed took me upstairs, but he never showed me the room us girls would be sleeping in.

"do you know where the living room upstairs is?" my voice was groggy as I turned to face javon.

"you ready to go to sleep?" he questioned pursing his lips together. I nodded my head, feeling my eyes want to shut right then and there.

"yeah I'll take you up there." his voice was low as he grabbed my hand gently pulling me up from the couch.

"goodnight guys," I smiled softly to the few people that were sitting in the room with us.

they all said goodnight back, a couple waving at me as wanna led me up the stairs slowly trying to ensure I had my balance.

"did you have fun tonight?" he asked looking back at me as we finally reached the top of the stairs.

I chuckled under my breath, excited to finally get some rest. "yeah, it was pretty fun."

"good." he simply said as we walked hand in hand down a hallway before reaching the living room door.

he twisted the door knob with his empty hand revealing a pitch black room.

we took a few steps through the doorway, hearing absolutely no noise being made inside.

we walked in quietly, then shutting the door silently. my eyes slowly started to adjust to the darkness in the room javon guided me towards one of the couches.

he gradually let go of my hand turning on a floor lamp, revealing klai sound asleep on one of the couches.

"I didn't even know klai came up here," I whisper laughed rubbing my eyes from the sudden light.

I walked towards the couch that was closest to me, squinting my eyes slightly to see if my eyes would adjust to see better.

"who's all sleeping in here?" I questioned out of curiosity, as I laid down onto my back letting myself get comfortable.

wanna lifted the covers, placing them over my body. "just you, klai, and kennedy." he spoke in a plain voice.

my eyes looked to the other couch seeing that klai's mouth wide open, but not a single peep coming out of her.

"okay, well goodnight see you in the morning."
I sighed, immediately closing my eyes.

I felt javon's presence hovering above my face as he placed a light kiss on my cheek, "goodnight baby."

though I was drunk, tired, and so over this night the butterflies never failed to swarm around my body.

I heard his footsteps slowly walk out of the room shutting the door.

after a couple of minutes had passed, I could feel myself slowly start to fall asleep. my head was spinning, but sleep was the only thing I wanted right now.

as the room stayed silent, my body felt weaker and weaker as my brain slowly started to fade off.

falling into sleep

———
4:15 am

my eyes fluttered open, seeing nothing but pitch black. my body felt cold as I laid on my back, no longer being under the blanket.

my mouth felt sticky and dry at the same time making it difficult for me to even swallow.

"shit." I mumbled in a groggy voice, slowly lifting my body up and trying to quietly navigate towards the door.

once I reached it I twisted the door knob trying to be quiet as possible, knowing everyone was asleep by this time.

I walked back down the hallway that javon lead me through a few hours earlier, trying my hardest to not wake anyone up.

once I reached the staircase I noticed a light in one of the half bathrooms was on and the door was creeped open.

out of curiosity, I walked closer to make sure no one had fallen asleep in the restroom.

once I got close enough to see through the portion of the door that was open I heard muffled whispers coming from the other side.

"can you just please respect what I'm asking you?" I heard a voice whisper yell. "ethan already told you he doesn't want you staying the night here."

"I don't know why you're acting like you don't know who I am." the other voice spoke in their normal tone, no whisper, no muffles.

wanna?

instantly I felt my eyebrow cock as I moved my head over to see behind the door, and there stood sidney and javon in the room talking together.

everything in my body felt like it had stopped, my heart completely dropping to my stomach at the sight of the two of them.

it stayed quiet for a second as a groan left javon's mouth, sounding exhausted.

"sidney just go home," his voice whispered quietly. "and leave me alone."

"javon give me a fucking break." sidney's voice rang through the room—not even trying to hide her voice.

"you've already caused enough issues tonight; why do you just keep itching for problems." javon's tone lightly raised as his tone sounded annoyed.

"you're acting like we fucked in front of her or something. calm down." her words came out feisty as she chuckled lowly.

"I don't want to upset her so please just accept what I'm saying and leave." javon's voice laced with stress, sounding overwhelmed with the while situation.

"why can't I go say bye to everyone?" she asked, seeming desperate to spend more time at the house

"no." javon's voice was demanding. "go home sidney it's late just go home."

"paige left already, I don't have a ride home." she complained, throwing her hands down to her side.

"there's other people that could take you home."  his voice sounding more and more fed up with the conversation.

"javon please." her voice suddenly softened in order to convince him, as I felt my jaw clench from the scene in front of me.

"alright look," javon sighed rubbing his forehead with his hand. "I'll take you home but don't think for a second this meant something."

"okay I won't." sidney smirked, lowering her eyebrows.

"and don't say a word about this either." javon said turning over his shoulder and picking up something from off the counter.

I quickly turned on my heel tip toeing back to the living room before they came into the hallway. just barley making it before I heard the bathroom door shut.

I closed my eyes in order to calm my entire body. everything inside my was exploding with nerves and frustration. frustrated that this was all actually happening, and nervous that something might go down between them in the blink of an eye.

there was a heat burning inside of me with nothing but annoyance.

without saying anything, I shifted my body, rolling over onto the couch.

I stayed quiet, not wanting to wake klai or kennedy. but my body was still filled with frustration, my chest exhaling deeply to release the feeling.

the entire room was quiet and it stayed that way for the rest of the night.

every part of me wanted to get up and leave, but I knew that I would be being dramatic, and that javon was my only ride home.

but he was too busy taking sidney home.

my mind started to remember the conversation ethan and I had earlier about how he needs me to trust him. about how he needs me to believe that he cares about me enough to not hurt me.

maybe I'm just over thinking everything, or maybe I'm not.

maybe I need to start believing in him, and not his reputation.

but how could I after tonight?

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next chapter out soon. hope you guys are loving it🩷