(Y/N POV)

A beautiful day. Not a murmur, nor a whisper. Washington ordered for all soldiers not to approach me, unless within good reason. This took a bit of force from Alexander but he established it. And oh my had I not had such a peaceful day since July.

I chose a chair on the front porch of the house which outlooked the streets. A bouquet of dead flowers were stranded in a pot on a lone table, its water now murky and sage. Evidently it hadn't been tended to for a long while. Pity. Beautiful flowers on a beautiful day would only increase the small fragment of beauty that the world had to share. The fragment that humans chose to ignore.

"A letter for you, Miss!" Cornelius crossed through the gate with a sack piled with letters.
"Helping out in the community! Very nice!" I exclaimed in surprise.
"Yes, well..." -He handed me the letter from the stairs- "I'm sure Mr Hamilton would not want to see me here under any other circumstances."
"Oh don't mind him, he's full up of himself."

Just as I'd hoped, a letter from Charles. The address read as it did day after day. "Thank you." I turned my back to him, scraping at the edges of the envelope.
"Miss!" he disturbed.
I peered over my shoulder. "Yes?" 
Cornelius set his eyes to the ground. Melancholically. "Please. Don't lose sight of what is most important. Your contentment is what you should idolize, not your honour."

He spun around with the sack to leave. Whilst he walked down the street, his face contorted several emotions. Alas, they were all individually struck with negativity. I'd learnt that he was a man of secrets; there'd by no use trying to disturb him. Therefore, I sat down in the chair once again and tore the envelope.

Dearest Y/N,

Will it satisfy you to know that I am convalescing? It is a monotonous reminder for my words to penetrate deep into your mind. I am without woe, Dear, only that of my yearning heart for you. You must be surfeited with it by this moment. I call any gentleman a coward if he trusts that it is defensible to find himself a mistress in the departure of his lover. You have won me, and no mistress will ever please.

I read over the works of the Bard of Avon and wonder how two lovers can fall so affectionate to one another. Affection leading to their inevitable deaths, I am sure you are aware. Romeo's cry, "Here’s to my love!" as he consumes the fatal poison. "Thus with a kiss I die." Romeo finishes. Tragedy from the fate of a feuding family. Juliet awakens, her lover deceased. "There rust, and let me die." Juliet finalizes, collapsing upon Romeo's corpse at the hand of the dagger.

A tale of two lovers brought to a wretched end. The man is only so great because he tells a truth that not a soul will admit. No pair of lovers have made themselves untroubled. In this patriarchal world that we live in, men take their dominance over women and defraud their fortune. An irksome confession it is to make, women are forseen as sexual partners. They are treated alike animals. I would do everything to spare you from that life.

Your Uncle has discussed this with me. I say it only because of your failure to inform me of these rascals you encountered in England. I forgive you, Dear, as I love you. If you had told me, I would have forced you back home. Should any other man cause you distress, you notify me immediately. I love you. You make me feel like the man my Father was determined to create. I could not adore anything on this earth more than you. When I see you back home, it would be my privilege to ask for your hand in marriage.

Be strong, Dear. I will forever be here for you.

- Charles

I hit my lap with the letter. "...it would be my privilege to ask for your hand in marriage..." I replayed over in my mind. This was, essentially, a proposal. His proposal. The man that I... I loved...

I...

I couldn't...

But it wouldn't change anything!

It... It would... If-

I'd shaped history far enough yet only now was it occurring to me. I might be taught about in schools... I might make an entirely new character in Hamilton, if Hamilton exists...

Will I exist?

If...

If me and Charles were married, what were the odds that we'd start a family? Relatively high, from my presumptions. Once Emily and John are married, their chances are high, too. Although, that was a risk that Emily was willing to take. I'd warned her before and she didn't listen... If I didn't listen to myself, if I bared children... They could be in danger.

Our lives could be in danger.

Anyone could discover our secret. I could be killed, Charles could be killed... Our children could be killed... I loved him and wanted to spend my life here with him. It was just... too dangerous. I couldn't go back to the 21st Century knowing that my husband and children have been gone for around 200 years.

...I couldn't...

Dear Charles,

Need I express my everlasting love for you? Never do I intend to leave your side; you are a true mystery to these swollen eyes. I want to reach out for you but war pulls me back. My duty is to this country and I shall not hesitate to serve.

I'm glad to hear that you're improving. Alas, the men in England were not so bad, so do not worry. They only teased, hardly any of what my Uncle speaks is true. Just the same, I am devoted to you and no man can change that. You are utterly captivating and it's a shame that no man bows his head to you just because of your class.

My hopes go out to Valentino. She had better be keeping you company or we are going to have to talk. She's such a sweet girl, nothing like you had been at that age. A boy who never spoke a word or interacted with his peers. See yourself now, Charles- that boy cowers whilst you rise into a charming man.

Despite admitting my devotion, I am compulsed to decline your offer at this moment. I cannot marry for the sake of your defence. It is much for me to explain and I would prefer if we could talk personally. I trust you with every inch of my being and I know that you can keep this secret for me. I am dreadfully sorry, Charles. Know that I have not given up on you. I never will.

You be strong, for I will love you forevermore.

- Y/N