☆ Polnareff's a dumbass ☆


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By the time you all had arrived in Hong Kong, you were starving and exhausted.

From not being able to sleep on the fight to the fight against Tower of Gray, you felt like you could pass out at any moment. You, Kakyoin, Jotaro, and Avdol were standing around while Mr. Joestar was on the phone across the street. A street vendor attempted to sell you dim sum and rice porridge. Kakyoin started talking to Jotaro about rice porridge, but you weren't paying attention, or at least you weren't until he asked you a question.

"What about you, Akira?"

You just stared with a blank expression on your face.

"Uhh..."

You had no idea how to respond, but then just in time, Mr. Joestar came over and told us about his friend who owned a restaurant.

The street vendor offered him hot cola, and Mr. Joestar started to complain about it, saying that it's disgusting and it should be cold.

While you made your way to the restaurant, Mr. Joestar and Avdol went ahead and were talking while the other three of you followed behind.

Taking note of your exhausted state, Kakyoin asked

"Are you alright, Akira?"

"Yeah, I'm just tired, that's all."

You felt bad lying, but you were partially telling the truth. All your questions, and so far you've only received two answers. Well, one answer for two questions.

'Not everyone of DIO's servants has a fleshbud. But in that case, how many do? Will they be like Kakyoin? Will they join us? Can we even trust Kakyoin?'

Questions and thoughts ran through your mind, but the latter you were able to answer. If he was still under DIO's control, he would have probably sabotaged your attack on Tower of Gray. He most likely would have also tried to do something while you were asleep back in Japan, so until you were able to recognize otherwise, your gut told you that it was alright to trust him.

-

You finally had arrived at the restaurant.

All of you sat at a table, you between Avdol and Kakyoin. Jotaro and Mr. Joestar sat across from the both of you. The others began discussing routes to get to Cairo. You had figured that Mr. Joestar already had a plan, that's what his phone call was about earlier.

"We can't afford to get any more innocent civilians hurt," Avdol said.

"That means flying is out of the question," Mr. Joestar responded.

"We probably would've been in Cairo by now," Kakyoin said, and after saying it, a silence fell over all of you. You all knew you had to hurry, because Holly's, as well as other innocent people's lives were on the line. Mr. Joestar continued talking in order to take away from the somber mood.

"Though our time is limited, the ways to get to Egypt aren't. A man once wrote a book about travelling the world in eighty days, and that was in the age of tra-"

As he was talking, you grew bored waiting to find out what it was.

"Oi Old man ," you interrupted, "I know you have something up your sleeve, so just come out with it."

"Why do you always have to ruin the dramatic reveal,  Akira ?" He whined and cleared his throat. "Shes correct, I do have something up my sleeve," he pulled a map from his coat and set it on the table. He dragged his finger across the map to Singapore, explaining the route we would take, and the fact that the Speedwagon Foundation was providing us with a ship.

"This way we won't harm any innocent civilians if a stand user attacks."

"Sounds good to me," you respond.

"I've never travelled through there so there's nothing I can comment on," Kakyoin says, to which Jotaro nods in agreement.

Jotaro and Kakyoin talk, while Mr. Joestar and Avdol talk. You were too deep in thought to be concerned with what they were talking about. Despite your exhaustion, you were concerned about what was to come. Breaking you from your thoughts, was someone approaching your table.

"Excuse me," the man started, "I'm a tourist from France, and I'm having trouble with the kanji on this menu. Can you help me?"

You were really hoping Avdol didn't put you on the spot here. Your shop in Cairo didn't have any televisions, so you resorted to books as a way to pass the time. One of these books was a French language book you found at a cheap price from a vendor. French was just something you learned out of pure boredom, and though you weren't completely fluent, you knew enough to hold a conversation.

"You're annoying, scram," Jotaro said.

You felt eyes burning into the side of your head. You turned to see Avdol staring at you. You stared back at him. While Joseph was trying to settle the tension his grandson you created, you and Avdol were having your staring contest.

Avdol looked at the french man and said, "She can help you, isn't that right, Akira?"

Your face had a blank expression on it. Avdol nodded and stared at you, motioning for you to look at the man. "Yare yare daze" You sighed and looked at the silver-haired man.

"Oui, je vais t'aider"

("Yeah, I'll help you")

The man's face lit up, as he pushed a chair in between you and Avdol, pushing you towards Kakyoin. Your shoulder was pressed against his to account for the stature of the man. You looked at him and gave a little  side smile. He returned the smile, a light pink tint on his cheeks, which made yours do the same.

"Merci beaucoup!"

("Thank you so much!")

The man said with a big cheesy green .

"Ce n'est pas une grosse affaire"

("It's not a big deal")

You started to help him with the kanji on the menu, pointing things out and saying what they were, however you were apparently taking too long since Mr. Joestar had already ordered.

"Quel est votre nom?"

("What is your name?")

You ask him, attempting conversation.

"Jean-Pierre Polnareff" he responds.

'That's suspiciously french sounding' you thought to yourself.

"Tu sais," he began, "vous êtes très attrayant, je-"

("You know, you're quite attractive, I-")

A shadow cast over your eyes "Parle-moi encore comme ça et tu es mort." You reply with distaste lying in your tone. You weren't in the mood to entertain the idea of flirting with someone at the moment.

("Talk to me like that again, and you're a dead man")

He let out a nervous chuckle.

You heard a whisper, accompanied by a rush of hot air tickling your ear.

"What'd you say?" Kakyoin asked.

You had a pit in your stomach, and felt what seemed to be a rush of nervousness overtake you. You rarely ever get nervous, so the feeling was foreign.

Your face turned slightly red as you whispered to him what you told the silver-haired man and what he said to you.

He let out a small laugh. You leaned back in your chair and crossed your legs. You closed your eyes, just trying to think about what's coming. You then smelled food, and you popped up, eyes wide open as if you hadn't looked passed out two seconds earlier.

You looked at the spread on the table.

"Uh, Mr. Joestar," you started to ask, "are those frogs?"

"This is different," Kakyoin said hesitantly.

"I knew this was bound to happen," Jotaro said with a disgusted look on his face.

Mr. Joestar laughed and said, "It doesn't matter, everything's on me." He laughed again before saying, "Dig in everyone."

Everyone paused for a minute.

"I've eaten worse," you say, reaching for an oyster. You looked towards Avdol, and once he noticed you looking you mouthed the words 'how do I eat this?'

He showed you how, and so you ate it.

"Actually, it isn't bad," you said, "well that, or I'm just extremely hungry."

As everyone started to eat, Polnareff complimented the attention to detail. He then picked up a carrot.

"Even the carrots are shaped like little stars!"

The comment made you unnerved and you thought you felt a stand being summoned, so you were on guard. Then, he said,

"Actually, I know someone with a birthmark just like this."

You stood up, and just as you did, a rapier shot through the table and headed straight for Mr. Joestar.

Luckily, Mr. Joestar's metal hand protected him so no damage was done. Before you could call out your stand, Avdol called out Magician's Red. It launched flames at Polnareff. Instead of causing him harm, he had surrounded his stand's sword with the flames.

This brought a shocked look to everyone, besides Jotaro's, faces. He seemed rather unimpressed. 

He took the flames and made a clock on a table that had been knocked over already.

"My stand represents the Chariot card, it's name is Silver Chariot," he paused, "Muhammad Avdol, it seems you'll be the first to die."

The comment made you take out your knife, just as you were about to take action, Mr. Joestar stopped you.

"Let him take care of this, Akira."

He rested his hand on your shoulder. Your stare at Polnareff, shooting metaphorical daggers into the back of his head.

"If he pulls some shit, I'm fighting him, Mr. Joestar."

Mr. Joestar sighed, knowing there was no stopping you.

Polnareff continued, taunting and disrespecting Avdol. The things he was saying made it difficult to not go over and beat the shit out of him. Everything going on all at once and in the moment had you itching for a cigarette.

-

You were now standing in the Tiger Balm gardens. Polnareff suggested that you all go there to fight in order for the fight to be "even". His cocky attitude was starting to piss you off.

You took out a cigarette and began to smoke while the two men got ready to fight.

You could barely process the strange architecture around you before they started to prepare.

"Polnareff's a dumbass." You thought aloud.

"What makes you say that?" questioned Jotaro.

"Though Magician's Red's flames aren't like any natural flames, allowing more oxygen to get to any fire is dumb regardless," you blow smoke then take a deep breath, "giving Avdol this much space, not to mention the fact that Polnareff's cockiness is putting him at a disadvantage in it of itself, the outcome won't be what he predicts."

"How does his pride figure into this?" Kakyoin asks.

"Well, if you put too much faith into your power, you allow your mind to take a backseat to the situation at hand. To put it plain and simple, he's relying on his stand so much that he won't think about things clearly."

You recalled what happened in the restaurant.

Before you left for the garden, you had seen Silver Chariot pierce through five coins, trapping fire in the middle of them.

You recalled what Polnareff said about Magician's Red being powerless against him.

But you also recalled a look in Avdol's eyes that told you he was planning something.

Though you were terrified of something happening to him, you had to put your trust in him.

Mr. Joestar was standing in front of you, ready to stop you in case something was to happen.

You were preparing for that just in case.

Your stand could move at a slightly slower speed than his rapier, but it seemed that speed was all he had going for him. You had your speed combined with your precision and other abilities.

You were getting tired of standing, so you sat on the ground with your knees close to your chest.

You heard the fight begin and so you watched intently.

Both men unleashed their stands. Silver Chariot sent a barrage of swings at Magician's Red, but the stand continued to dodge them. Polnareff started taunting Avdol, which made you let out a sigh.

This asshole was starting to get on your nerves.

Avdol released an attack at Polnareff, which he deflected. The attack hit one of the statues, which then turned perfectly into a replica of Magician's Red.

"The bastard is toying with us!" Mr. Joestar grunted.

Then, Avdol's mood began to change. He started to become more serious about the fight.

"The three of you are going to want to hide behind something," you warned them, "he's about to use his special move."

You've fought alongside Avdol while he used his special move, so you were unfazed by the flames and heat it created.

Avdol yelled, "Crossfire Hurricane!" A mass of fire was sent straight for Polnareff.

Magician's Red sent the move straight for Polnareff.

"I told you before, Silver Chariot can slice away your flames," Polnareff said while he sent the move flying back towards Avdol.

Avdol and Magician's Red both started to burn, you pulled out your knife and were about to head into the fight when you noticed something no one else had.

Avdol switched his own stand with the statue Polnareff created. You scoffed a small chuckle at the realization.

You put away your knife as Magician's Red sent an attack at Polnareff, causing him to catch fire.

"You underestimated me when I told you I could control my flames freely," he started, "I used them to melt the statue's joints so it could move. You got defeated by your own stand."

Avdol then prepared to send another Crossfire Hurricane in his direction.

He sent his attack which caused Polnareff to fly backwards.

"Such power, his stand probably melted from the flames," Mr. Joestar observed.

"That's one hell of a burn, he'd be lucky if he's in critical condition," Jotaro responded to him.

"If he is alive, he'll be unable to move for at least a couple months," Kakyoin added.

Avdol made his way over to the four of you, and said, "Now then, let's continue on our journey."

As you all started to leave, you sensed energy behind you. You stopped dead in your tracks, and looking back you saw Silver Chariot shedding its outer layer of armor.

"Guys, he isn't dead," the men stopped and looked at you, and then saw the explosion of armor coming from the stand. Polnareff himself flew in the air and began to float there. Under him was a less bulky version of Silver Chariot. He then flipped onto the ground.

"How is that possible?" Avdol rhetorically questioned.

Just as Polnareff was about to explain, you walked in front of Avdol.

"I've seen that dumb looking face of yours too much in the past hour. Maybe if I wack it a few times, I can fix it."

"Akira, what are you-"

Avdol tried to question you, but you continued talking.

"I would say our stands are best suited to fight each other, so if you want a fair fight, then I think we should settle this."

"My, my," he responded, "if you think your stand can beat mine, I can assure you that you're mistaken."

"She doesn't have her knife," Kakyoin commented.

"Let's test your theory then, Polnareff," you taunted him.

"OH NOO!! This isn't good, Akira has no sense of self-preservation!" Mr. Joestar practically yelled while putting his hands on the sides of his face

"What are you thinking, Akira?" Avdol sternly questioned you, to which you responded,

"Don't worry, you know I have it under control."

Avdol thought for a moment, then backed off.

"Avdol, you have to stop them! They're going to get themselves killed!" Mr. Joestar started to raise his voice even more.

"Gramps, calm down. Do you not realize what her stand can do?" Jotaro responded to him.

"Yes, but at what cost? They cou-"

Avdol interrupted him, "Just trust Akira. You know she isn't foolish, I can assure you she'll hold her own."

As he said that, Silver Chariot began its onslaught.

You hadn't even brought your stand out. Silver Chariot left cuts all over your body, with enough force that it sent you flying back.

"Akira!" you heard Kakyoin shout.

You summoned The Universe behind you before you landed so you wouldn't break anything.

"You clearly don't know what my stand is capable of," you said to him. The wounds you had mimicked on your stand's body, and your stand pulled out a rapier identical to Silver Chariot's out of your left arm.

"W-what!?" Polnareff exclaimed.

"Don't act so surprised," you responded. "To be completely honest with you, I'm pretty exhausted, so let's make this fast."

You had your stand harden the blood coming out of its wounds, and it was able to deflect Silver Chariot's attacks.

"What's wrong?" he asked, "Are you slowing down already?"

"Damn it. I don't know if she can keep up for much longer," Avdol stated.

Silver Chariot sent an attack straight for your neck.

"I've got you now," Polnareff taunted.

"Akira!" Mr. Joestar shouted.

You then used whatever energy you had left to use your speed to run behind Polnareff.

He had continued his attack, only to be hitting nothing.

"Where did she go!?" He shouted in frustration.

"Behind you," you teased.

Before he could respond, your stand punched him "MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA, MUDAAAAAAAA!!!!! WRYYY!!!" , your stand cried. The Universe punched him hard enough not to kill him but to render him unconscious .

His body fell forward.

You looked at the men who were staring at you.

Your stand brought your blood back into your body.

"Let's look for a fleshbud."

You walked over to grab your cigarettes that fell from when the fight was happening while the others went to inspect his body. Sure enough they found a flesh bud. Jotaro volunteered to remove it, which gave you a break. The fights of the previous day and a half mixed with the concentration you were keeping on your ribs exhausted you.

After Jotaro removed the bud, Joseph made a bad pun about being 'buddies' now.

You shook your head and the five of you walked away from the garden.

To be continued...>

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