You've Got to Be Kidding Me

In a secluded room, a security guard had observed Declan's slow, faltering movements from one monitor to the next as cameras picked him up, making his way from one hallway and down another.


"Mr. Donnelly looks like he may have had a bit too much to drink," he commented to himself.


"What's that you said, mate?" a second guard asked as he entered the room, just catching the very end of what Patrick had said.


"I said it looks like Mr. Donnelly had too much to drink," Patrick said, pointing to a monitor.


"He didn't drink anything, Paddy...I was just down there and his hands stayed empty the whole time."


"You sure, Dave?"


"Aye... not even a wee nip or water, for that matter. You stay here, I'm going to go check on him," the older of the two said as he watched Dec enter his dressing room and shut the door.


Minutes later, the security guard was greeted by Ant, who had just stepped out of the stairwell.


"How are you doing, Dave?" the entertainer asked, shaking hands with the security guard.


"Doing well enough but its that partner in crime of yours that I'm concerned about." Ant raised an eyebrow at the comment.


"Paddy saw him on the monitors looking like he was having a bit of a time getting down the hallways. Thought I'd check on him but..."


Ant wasn't even going to wait long enough to hear the security guard finish his sentence. He started down the hallway then called over his shoulder. "What are you waiting for, man...let's go!"


Moments later, the pair was standing outside the dressing room he and Dec shared. Ant knocked on the door and turned knob only to be surprised when the door hardly opened at all when he attempted to push it open.


"Declan?" he called out before turning to the guard.


"Something's in the way," he said with a frown, taking a small step back, allowing the other man to push at the door. It opened just enough that they finally saw that Dec's body was lying on the floor, hindering their abilities to fully open it. With a gasp, Ant dropped to his knees then reached through the opening, his hand trembling as he grasped the unconscious figure's left wrist in search of a pulse. Relief flooded him when he felt a steady beat beneath his fingertips. He then stretched him arm far enough that he was able to place his hand on Dec's back.


"He's got a pulse and he's breathing," he said, looking up to see that the guard was on his radio requesting help. "Help me get in there to him,"he ordered, standing up to further push open the door all the while urging Dec to wake up.


"Careful there, mate," the guard urged as they were forced to push the door rather hard to move Dec's unresponsive body far enough so that Ant could slide through the narrow opening. After a few more moments, Ant was finally able to step over Dec then kneel beside his friend. He lowered himself to eye level with Dec, who was lying face down on the carpeted floor. Cupping the back of the older man's head with his left hand, he whispered, "Good grief, Declan...you're burning up, man," before getting up so that he could drag Dec's unconscious form away from the door. He carefully placed his hands under his friend's arms and lifted his upper body off the ground then pulled him away from the door, allowing Dave to enter.


Moments later, he and the guard managed to place an unresponsive Dec on the sofa just as the shows medical personnel were accompanied into the room by two more security guards and several members from the production team. Ant was allowed to stay by Dec's side, but everyone else was told to wait in the hallway so that there was more room for the medics to maneuver around in the cramped dressing room.


"Let's make him a bit more comfortable, mate," medic Oliver Trent stated. Ant nodded then sat on the edge of the sofa and lifted Dec's limp form into a seated position, while the medic quickly removed his suit coat and tie then carefully ran his hands over Dec's head in search of any possible swelling from his collapse. Once finished, the medic carefully lowered Dec's head onto Ant's right shoulder so that his forehead was pressed against his neck. Feeling the heat radiating off his friend, Ant shook his head then whispered into Dec's ear, "Doolittle...you're scaring us. You need to wake up soon." Seconds later, Dec was gently lowered back onto the couch cushions and the medics began to work in earnest while Ant watched, feeling totally helpless.


"He's going to be okay, Ant...really," medic Daniel Johnson tried to reassure the distressed entertainer as he and Oliver performed a preliminary exam while asking him questions about how Dec may have been acting or feeling throughout the day or past few days. He was able to give them some information, but he felt his answers were inadequate as he watched the pair supply Dec with oxygen through a nasal cannula then check his blood pressure, temperature, and heart and lung sounds.


"Has a temp of 101...b/p 95/60...pulse rate 50...breathing is shallow at 35...skin is dry," Daniel stated quietly as he took Dec's right hand in his and pinched him, noting that his skin took nearly 8 seconds to return to normal. "He's moderately dehydrated. We'll need to get an IV started."


Oliver agreed as he busied himself with recording the vitals Daniel was stating as he worked over Dec's still form.


"Can you unbutton his shirt for us, Ant? We may need to set up an EKG." Ant nodded at Oliver then began the task with shaking hands. As he made his way down Dec's shirt, he began noticing small raised bumps on his friend's chest then his belly.


At the same time, as Oliver finished recorded Dec's vitals, Daniel turned to look back at the unconscious entertainer, then blew out a breath before shaking his head.


"It's chicken pox...he's got the chicken pox." He looked up to see Ant's confusion.
"Me wee lad had them about 3 months ago...no way I'll ever forget what those spots looked like," he added with another shake of his head as he pointed to the small pinhead sized blisters dotting Dec's chest and belly.


"He hasn't been around anyone..." Ant began only to be interrupted by a loud groan from the doorway.


"Yes, he has, mate...Tawnya in wardrobe has a case of the shingles but her doctor cleared her to work...said she couldn't spread them to anyone. I have his okay in writing on my desk," the producer said, covering his mouth with his hand before lowering it to whisper, "sorry, mate."


Before Ant could reply, Oliver touched his arm. "He's coming round." Ant immediately grasped Dec's right hand and cupped his face with his other, turning it so that when Dec lazily blinked his eyes open, he was the first person seen.


"Hi there, Declan...glad you're with us again," he said gently, taking in the confusion plainly written on the older man's face. It was as if he were trying to relay the fact that he hadn't been gone and had no clue what Ant had meant.


Daniel stepped into view, putting his hand on Ant's shoulder, indicating that the entertainer needed to move to the side. Dec's look of confusion transformed into one of worry when he recognized the medic.


"I'm not going anywhere, Declan...I've got you...I've got you. Just going down here to get out of the way." Ant kept a hand on his friend as he moved further down the couch before picking up Dec's feet to make room for him to sit down, placing them in his lap. His friend might not be able to see him but he'd feel his presence.


"Declan, can you tell me what happened?" the medic asked, watching as Dec swallowed thickly before whispering his reply while rubbing a shaky hand over his forehead.


"Me head and ears were aching...was dizzy...felt feverish...got to the door then...nowt. What happened to me, Danny?" he asked, wincing then pressing his fingers against his forehead in an effort to relieve his growing headache.


"Looks like you collapsed inside our dressing room," Ant replied from the end of the sofa. "I found you against the door...had a time trying to get to you." He watched as the medic held a pen light to Dec's eyes to check for the pupil response. Dec hissed in pain, the light seemed to cut its way right through his eyes into his brain causing his headache pain to further increase.


"It looks like your head is really bothering you, mate," Oliver said, from behind Dec's head. Dec tried to look up at the medic but his effort caused dizziness to sweep through him and he slammed his eyes shut.


"You think?" Ant asked from his position at the end of the couch. His tone was a little exasperated but he gave an apologetic look to the medics who both smiled. They understood how upset he was with the whole situation.


Absent mindedly, Dec scratched at his stomach but was surprised when the Daniel lifted his hand away. "I know they itch but its best to leave them be...you've  got chicken pox, mate."


For a split second, Dec just stared at the medic before slightly lifting his head off a cushion, attempting to see exactly what he was talking about only to groan out loud when he finally understood...there were a few dozen spots scattered across his chest and stomach.


"How...me mam always said I was immune...like me brother and sister," he whined, dropping his head back down onto the cushion.


"Looks like Anne was wrong, Decs," Ant said, gently patting his friend's leg before turning to medic. "So, why did he pass out?"


"I'd say it was the low blood pressure brought on by dehydration...he may have a slight ear infection...both aren't uncommon when it comes to chicken pox and can cause dizziness. With adults, some symptoms can be more problematic than with children." Turning his attention to back Dec, the medic asked, "When was the last time you ate or drank anything, Dec?"


Dec rubbed his forehead then shrugged tiredly. "I had some water before the show but food...I don't know...maybe yesterday lunch? I haven't had an appetite...nowt sounded or looked good," he explained, missing the look of concern clearly written on Ant's face. Oliver and Daniel exchanged glances, nodding since they now knew what the missing piece was as to what may have started the whole process in how Dec had lost consciousness.


"Do you have something that's mild for him to eat here?" Oliver asked, looking at the faces in the hallway.


"Isn't Madeline in make-up pregnant?" Ant asked, looking at one of the producers at the door. "I know Ive seen a box of crackers at her station...just this afternoon, I think."


"Got it," the producer stated before heading down the hallway with a member of security. It was about 5 minutes later before the pair returned with a sleeve of crackers. Oliver opened the package then offered a half cracker to Dec, who was trying to remain somewhat seated, but his dizziness was making the task rather difficult. He nibbled at the cracker and took a sip or two from a water bottle only to feel so nauseous that he was certain he would be sick. He waved off any more offers of liquid and passed the half eaten cracker to Daniel.
"I'm feeling a bit sick," he mumbled as Ant helped him to lie back down before grabbing a waste can and setting it by the couch just in case Dec's stomach rebelled.


"I just want to go home and go to bed," Dec complained, not truly understanding what was going on other than the fact that he felt totally miserable and wanted nothing more to be in his own warm bed, buried under a mound covers.


"Does he need to go to hospital or is this something that could be handled by a home visit from his physician if I gave him a call right now?" Ant asked. He only wanted to do what was best for Dec even though he knew it may very well end up being something the older man didn't want to do.


"Tell you what...let me speak with his doctor and well take it from there," Oliver said with a slight shrug. "Do you have his number?" Without opening his eyes, Dec patted at his pants pockets then, with a slight frown he realized that he didn't have his suit coat on anymore. "Me phone is in me coat pocket," he groaned.


"Got it," Daniel said, sifting through the coat's pockets then pulling out the phone before handing it over to Ant who immediately unlocked it then began looking through Dec's contacts.


"Dr. Shannon...Kerry Shannon," Dec whispered as he again rubbed his forehead. The pain was becoming more unbearable by the minute.


Minutes later Ant handed over the phone to Oliver and the medic gave all the information they had been able to gather to the doctor. Ant listened to the one-sided conversation while watching Dec fight a losing battle in keeping his eyes open. He gently patted his friend's leg.


"Just close your eyes, Declan..it's okay...close your eyes." Dec certainly didn't need any more encouragement from Ant. With a tired sigh, he turned his head toward the back of the sofa and, within just a moment or two, his breathing had evened out...he was asleep.


"Well...what do we need to do?" Ant asked, staring at his now sleeping friend. "Does he need to go to hospital?"Oliver shook his head no.


"Nah, mate. He's going home but we're going to leave him on the oxygen for now and start an IV to help with the dehydration. Dr. Shannon also wants us to administer a shot of benadryl to help with the itching and he's prescribed some co-codamol for his fever and pain relief."


"That shot's going to knock him out, won't it?" Ant asked, not relishing the idea of having to manhandle his friend into his home. Thankfully, one of the guest suites downstairs would save his back from carrying Dec upstairs to the master bedroom. He didn't think he and Lisa together would be able to manage the task...at least without some sharp words and a probably bruised and battered Declan.


"Aye, pretty much, especially when co-codamol is taken but you won't be on your own, Ant. We will be going with you to deliver him to his place and wait for the doctor to arrive once he's off duty in the morning." Knowing he wouldn't be on his own to care for his friend sent a flood of relief through Ant and a short laugh escaped him.


"Thanks, Oliver...Daniel. That's a load off me mind and me back."
The comment earned him a few laughs and seemed to clear some of the tension in the room. He still hadn't fully recovered from seeing Dec lying motionless and he doubted he ever would, for that matter.


Oliver interrupted his thoughts. "If he has some more comfortable clothes around here, between the three of us, we might be able to get him situated before we administer the shot."


"And I think this is when we need to give you some privacy," a voice from the hallway stated before adding, "We'll work on a way to get everyone out of here without much trouble." The door was shut quietly and the trio talked amongst themselves as they formed out a plan as to how to get Dec's clothes changed.


"I think he has an extra track suit hanging in the wardrobe over there," Ant pointed from his seat on the couch to a small door in the wall across the room. While the clothes were being searched for, Ant gently lifted Dec's feet off his lap then slid out from under them.


"He might have his trainers in there and some socks as well," he added as he joined Oliver at the wardrobe. Minutes later, the trio worked to get a rather uncoordinated Dec out of one set of clothes and into another.


"Give us a bit of a hand, Declan," Ant huffed while trying to pull his friend's limp arms through the short sleeves of his t-shirt. Dec just gave him a confused look through fever glazed eyes.


"I'm trying...I'm trying," he complained before sticking his tongue out in concentration.


"It's okay, Dec...we've got you," Oliver reassured him while they quietly laughed. "It's all good, mate," he added, patting a now fully dressed Dec on the shoulder. "You're good to go. Just take a lie down while we talk about how to get you out of here."


The trio watched as Dec nodded in response before seeming to melt into the surface of the sofa. He couldn't believe how incredibly knackered he was after simply changing clothes and he hadn't even had to do much of the work. Minutes later, Daniel woke him up to explain the IV and shot he would be administering while Oliver prepped him. Dec visibly blanched when he saw the large needle that would be used for the IV. He automatically reached out to Ant who held his hand during the insertion then moments later the benadryl was introduced through the IV port as well as a small dose of co-codamol for his fever and pain. It wasn't long before Dec's strong grip on Ant's hand became loose and his head lolled to the side as he fell deeply asleep.


"He hates shots and the sight of blood, especially his own, lays him out," Ant said with a sad smile when a knock at the door interrupted him.


"Come in," he answered, stepping over to open the door to see Dave and Patrick standing in the hallway.


"Coast looks clear if we can get him to the back entrance by the city rubbish bins," Dave said with a shrug. "No one has seen the pair of you leave yet so there's quite a bit of milling about everywhere else."


"I think Joe might be able to meet us back there without any none the wiser," Patrick added, referring to Ant and Dec's normal driver. "We told him the situation and he said he'll get his hands on another vehicle so that you might not be recognized and bothered one that you might be able to lay Dec in. He'll ring to let us know when hes getting in place."


In the meantime, Oliver and Daniel were busily gathering their supplies together when another security guard entered with a soft, flexible stretcher that they'd easily be able maneuver down the stairs with. "Thought you lads might need this," he said, handing it over to Ant.


"Thanks, Jamie," Daniel said, taking the stretcher from Ant before giving the entertainer some instructions as to how they were going to be carrying Dec from point A to point B. Several minutes later, Dec was securely strapped onto the stretcher and was being slowly carried by Ant, the medics, and a security guard through the hallways and into a service lift to get him to the ground level of the building. The group exited the lift then slipped into an empty room to wait for the okay that Joe was ready and waiting for them. As they waited, Oliver and Daniel rechecked Dec's vitals, noting that his blood pressure was somewhat improved but his temperature was slightly raised though they didn't seem too worried about that.


Finally, after nearly 15 minutes, the go ahead was given and the group swiftly exited the building then worked to get Dec's still form into the large van. Thankfully, there was adequate room to make sure he was comfortable. As Joe drove them through the darkened streets toward Dec's home, Ant called Lisa to explain what had happened and what they'd need to do to best care for their friend only to realize that Lisa wouldn't be able to be much help at all. She and Ant had been attempting to get pregnant for quite some time and she was fearful that direct exposure might do more harm than good since even she was unsure if she had had the childhood disease herself. Instead, she would prepare meals and deliver any needed medications or incidentals but, for the most part, Ant would be on his own in caring for his friend, at least until Dec was fever free and his rash had dried up completely. All in all, Ant was looking at about a week of care giving, but he knew that Dr. Shannon would make daily house calls and may even provide some sort of home health care if he requested it.


About 30 minutes later the group arrived outside Decs home. Joe drove through the gated drive then parked the vehicle. Once the gate had slid closed, blocking any sort of view from the street, Dec was unloaded and carried into the house where he was taken into a downstairs bedroom and put to bed. Ant took advantage of the fact that there were others there to watch over his friend and, as Joe left, he crossed the street and went to his home to shower and gather up a few things. About an hour later, he drove his car back over to Dec's house just in case he needed to run his friend to the doctor or go to the market to pick up something if Lisa was unable to. He entered the home and dropped his things in a bedroom that was adjacent to Dec's before heading to the kitchen to place a few items Lisa had put together into the refrigerator. There he found Daniel and Oliver sitting at the table drinking cups of hot coffee.


"He's resting well," Daniel reassured him before making his way over to the coffee pot. "Care for some?" he asked as he refilled his cup then filled another cup for Ant.


"Dr. Shannon will be here around 6 so there's really not much more we can do besides check on Dec every 20 to 30 minutes, or so..."


"20 to 30 minutes?" Ant asked, his eyebrows raised in astonishment. "I'll be checking him every 20 to 30 minutes?" He couldn't even begin to imagine how he was going to survive the next week if he weren't allowed time to rest.


Oliver laughed then shook his head. "No, mate. We've been checking him that often while he's under with the benadryl and co-codamol for the first time. He's doing just fine...really."


"The benadryl is powerful when given intravenously and will cause sedation. Dec is deeply asleep but will wake up in a few hours once both drugs have worn off. It's all good, mate," Daniel added before checking the nearby wall clock.


"And it looks like it's time to check in on him again," Daniel stated, as he took a sip from his coffee cup then stood up.


Ant automatically stood up and followed the pair through the house and into the bedroom where Dec was sleeping. He was a bit alarmed to see that the nasal cannula had been replaced by a mask but his concerns lessened somewhat when the medics reassured him that, since Dec was sedated, more concentrated oxygen would be a wise move to make. The medics made quick work of checking his vitals, noting that his temperature had neither gone up or down and his blood pressure remained on the low side of normal but the medications could be blamed for that. As the pair finished their work, Ant sat down beside his sleeping friend, placed a damp flannel on his forehead and spoke to him in low tones when Dec moaned and seemed a bit distressed only to quieten down when Ant put his hand on his shoulder.


"What's causing this?" he asked, slightly disturbed by how Dec was acting. Oliver frowned. "I'm thinking a combination of the medications, the fever and just generally feeling of being unwell."


"He seems to be resting well enough, though," Daniel added, watching as Ant continued in his ministrations, wiping Decs face with the cloth.


"If you don't mind, fellas, I'm just going to stay in here with him," he said looking over his shoulder before letting a small yawn escape. He was more than tired but entirely too concerned to get any rest.


"Sure," Oliver replied with a slight nod of understanding. You look shattered, mate. The bed's plenty big enough for you to get some rest yourself."


"It's another 3 or 4 more hours until Dr. Shannon's shift is even over so were going to taking turns getting some rest ourselves in the lounge. Decs vitals are strong and he's resting well so we'll check in on him in about an hour," Daniel added before giving Ant's shoulder a pat. "He's doing really well, Ant...trust us."


Ant smiled and nodded, watching the pair leave the room. He understood that Daniel and Oliver knew what they were talking about but seeing his friend so unwell and vulnerable made him uneasy all the same. He got up and turned the bedroom light off but the hallway light illuminated the room enough that he could easily see Dec's features. He then grabbed an extra blanket from a chest at the end of the bed. He climbed on the bed then made his way to the middle where he could very easily reach out to touch his friend, if need be. Leaning against several pillows propped against the headboard, he lay the blanket over his body pulling it up to his chin, then wiggled around a bit until he was comfortable. Dec stirred again and Ant lay his left hand on his friend, settling him. He gently rubbed Dec's shoulder then, several minutes later, despite his worries, he drifted off to asleep listening to quiet the hiss of the oxygen mask Dec was wearing.

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