one image attached

Sorry for the Dick Van Dyke pic.

fuck you.

do you not like the puns?

that's unfortunate.

part of me is thankful that you didn't make a pun there.

I'm terrible, but I'm not that bad.

Plus, puns aren't really my thing.

I have to read these texts really carefully because I'm worried you're trying to sneak one in.

You have trust issues, man.

I could help you with that.

I did help with your anger issues.

That's what you think.

You have no idea.

But I totally do.

I'm an almighty being.

I see all.

That's great news.

Thanks!

That was clearly sarcastic.

Not if I read it in an excited voice.

Well it definitely did not have that intention.

Does now.

You can't change the intention.

That's what you think.

You're so annoying.

That was sarcastic.

For fuck's sake.

Babe, I hate to say it but I think your anger issues are coming back.

Because of you.

No.

Because of the English language.

No.

Because of how you implement the English language.

same thing.

No it isn't.

Yeah it is.

No.

Yes.

No.

I'm just imagining you texting your angry texts in a tutu and they all seem less angry.

that's fucked up.

You know,,,

I bet you're super adorable.

bite me.

only if you ask nicely.