Chapter 30- Running for Gold

Anakin. Anakins in there. Anakin could be hurt.

All you could think about as you run into the burning building was Anakin. He was in there. Sirens sounded around you as the emergency services  helped the people around and right inside the building. You had told Satine to stay there and you ran past the people outside, but everything was a blur. You had yelled, "I'm a Jedi, I'm here to help!" as they tried to stop you.

When you got inside you sprinted up the smoky stairs. Anakin was on the highest floor without the Chancellor and that's where the speeder hit. While spinning, the speeder crashed into the top of the building flying through windows.

You kept on running even though your lungs burned and your eyes watered. You kept on running even though you could barely feel Anakin anymore. You kept on running even though your heart was in as much misery as your throat.

Eventually, you made it up to the top floor and it was a mess. Everything was thrown around and almost everything was broken. As you stopped in the doorway you realized people had followed you up. People as in Obi-Wan. He looked into your eyes and you could tell he was as pained as you.

Though right inside the room was the Chancellor, standing perfectly unharmed. You don't know how you missed him before he was standing right there. You ran toward him yelling,

"Chancellor? Chancellor are you alright?"

He whipped around and was surprised to see you, "Yes, yes I'm fine," he coughed, "Anakin, he saved me. He sensed it and through me back while throwing himself in front of me."

You stood there in shock, not of Anakins actions but of reality. He must be been badly injured.

"Is he in this rubble?" You pointed to what Palpatine was standing by.

"Yes, yes I believe so."

"Master Obi-Wan, please escort the Chancellor out of the building."

"Y/n-"

"Obi-Wan."

He nodded to you and then the Chancellor. Palatine followed him out of the room and you started to dig at his desk. You used the force to throw rubble out of the way, it didn't matter the room was trashed. Eventually, you found a hand and it was cut with small pieces of glass.

You continued to throw pieces off of him until you saw his entire body. He had been destroyed by the explosion yet you flipped him over and kneeled next to him. You felt for a pulse, but nothing, you listened for breathing, but nothing.

Crying, you tried to give him CPR. Even though the tears clouded your vision you saw the small cuts across his body and the rags he now wore. Obi-Wan walked back into the room as you placed your hands on either side of his face.

"Wake up," You pleaded unsteadily, "please."

Closing your eyes, you prayed. To anyone or anything that would listen. You begged for him to wake up, you begged for him back, you begged to see those bright blue eyes one more time. Now your hands felt as though they were vibrating and your head began to hurt. Yet, you kept your eyes closed.

You kept your eyes closed until you heard shuffling. You thought it was Obi-Wan but as you opened your eyes. Anakin awoke beneath you. Your hands gleamed golden as Anakin opened his eyes.

"Y/n?" He muttered, you just smiled, "Y/n? What are you doing?"

"You- you need to be alive." Your eyes fluttered as you smiled.

"Y/n, you can stop now. Y/n, I'm fine, I'll heal."

"No- no, you need this more than I do."

Your head pounded as Anakin sat up. The small cuts on his face had healed and left no scar instead, they shone gold.

"Y/n, Y/n, please stop. I'll be fine, you're bleeding, you're dying."

"It's worth it."

Anakin pryed at your hands trying to pull you away but it was too late. You sank into the floor as your eyes closed and your headache stopped. He would be fine.

~Obi-Wan's POV~

I ran back into the room after finding someone to take the Chancellor outside. The smoke hadn't cleared in his office as I stood there watching Y/n hold onto Anakin's face. 

"Wake up, please." She whimpered while taking shaky breaths.

Even though I could see much, I saw her close he eyes and hold on. She was trying to get him back. After a few seconds, I was about to intervene but her hands started glowing through the smoke. A yellow halo appeared as she cried but I don't think she realized.

Until he started moving, small movements made her open her eyes to him waking up.

"Y/n?" He asked as he gained consciousness, "Y/n, what are you doing?"

"You- you need to be alive." She smiled at him, the same sickly smile from before she was kidnapped.

Anakin pleaded for her to stop but she refused. Small cuts started to appeared on her face and hands as they disappeared from his. She cared too much, but maybe everyone else just cared too little. Her face bled and paled while Anakin looked downright terrified. He tried to take her hands from his face but it was too late.

I watched Y/n fall into Anakin's lap as he yelled for her.

"Y/n! Y/n, please come back!" He held her face waiting for her to wake up but she didn't.

When Anakin realized her eyes weren't opening he hugged her and held her close to him. The sirens had died down and now all I could hear were his sniffles and pleas. He rocked her back and forth and I knew he wasn't supposed to care so much either, but no one would know. Then he began to cough and the smoke wasn't clearing.

"Anakin," I whispered but he didn't hear me, "Anakin."

He whipped around at my voice and I saw his tear-stained eyes and cheeks.

"We- we need to get out of here."

He coughed, "Not until she- not until she wakes up."

"Anakin, we'll take her to the temple. They can help her there."

He didn't say anything, he just stood up and picked her up. Her bleeding head fell like a ragdoll but he cradled her and held her so tightly it would've hurt if she was awake. I led the way down the many stairs. The floor had fallen through each other and we had to dodge holes. Then I made our way through the rubble while Anakin walked behind me. 

Through the broken doors I had ran past to follow Y/n, I saw Auren, Ashoka, and Satine.

~Auren's POV~

I stood with Ashoka and Duchess Satine as we waited for our friends. We hadn't talked to the Duchess except to ask what was happening, but we could guess she was here for Obi-Wan. Then three figures began to emerge from the smoke and ash. 

It had to be my master, Master Skyguy, and Master Obi-Wan. The firemen had told us they were the only ones left in there. Ashoka and I smiled at them walking out but as they got closer, only two were walking. The third was being carried.

The smoke cleared in front of them so I could see Master Obi-Wan and Skywalker walking with their heads hanging low. My master lay in Ashoka's Master's arms. My breath became shaky with my hands and legs. She couldn't be dead, but I couldn't feel her.

Paramedics walked over to Master Skywalker and he reluctantly laid my master onto a stretcher. A few tears fell from my eyes but I didn't want to believe what was happening. I just got her back, she couldn't be gone again? She would just wake up and everything would be fine.

"I'm sorry." A voice said from in front of me.

I opened my eyes, which I had closed while shaking my head, to see Master Obi-Wan with his hand on my shoulder.

More tears fell as I stuttered, "She- she can't be..."

"We don't know and we won't know anything until they take care of her."

"So they'll- they'll take care of her. So she's alive."

"Auren."

My lip quivered as I tried to take deep breaths. Obi-Wan nodded and walked back to his former padawan who sat on the end of a speeder. Paramedics were checking off a list and saying 'all clear' or 'perfectly fine.' 

I started to walk toward him, I wanted to hear what happened but Ashoka grabbed my shoulder. I looked back and tried to take more deep breaths as she shook her head. When I looked back over to her master, he looked me in the eye. Before his gaze dropped and he tried to take deep breaths.

In the seconds that I looked at him, I could see his tear-stained face and shaky features. He fiddled with his hands as he tapped his foot on the ground. I don't understand how he could be fine, he was in the explosion.

I stepped back, realizing Y/n must've done something. I stepped back into Ashoka and she held me as I cried. I gripped the back of her shirt in my fragile state and she just muttered small words of comfort. Nothing helped. She could be dead and I didn't know anything.

I turned back around and she watched me with broken eyes. Sometimes I forget how much the people I care about matter to others. I saw the Duchess standing next to Master Obi-Wan but they didn't seem to be talking about him. The speeder my master was in, was now gone. While Master Skywalker sat on the edge of the speeder helplessly as they talked far away from him.

Taking a step forward, Ashoka grabbed me again but instead I kept going. I walked over to Obi-Wan and the Duchess and stood in front of them as they stopped talking.

"What happened?" I said as steadily as I could.

"Auren-"

"No, please I- I just want the truth."

Obi-Wan looked at me and nodded, "Anakin was badly injured from the explosion, and Y/n... Y/n ran in there and found him. She tore through the rubble and gave him- gave him back his life, I guess. I don't know how but he healed entirely but it took everything from her. All the damage went to her and- and it was too much."

I bit at my tongue to stop me from crying more but it didn't help. The Duchess's face was also tear-stained,

"How did you know Y/n?" I asked quickly before realizing what I said.

She was taken back, "What?" 

"How- how did you know her?"

"I- I'm her sister."

Normally I would've been thrilled that one of my theories was right, but now? Now there was too much and I couldn't do anything to stop it.

"Auren, Ashoka we should head back to the temple. Duchess, I'll contact you if her situation changes."

She nodded as Ashoka and I followed Obi-Wan over to the speeder he drove us here in. Even though we were mad at Master Skyguy for making us do that stupid training exercise. He still meant something to us and we knew he was in the explosion. We begged Master Kenobi to bring us and eventually he did.

He got into the pilot's seat and Ashoka and I sat in the back. I leaned on her shoulder the whole way back to the temple. It was too much, I didn't know what to do anymore.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We returned to the temple after a short drive back and we went straight to the medical wing. I ran there with Ashoka close behind me. When we got there, the door to Y/n's room was closed but we could see her in there through the window.

Droids worked on her from almost all angles. Moving her limp limbs and putting something on her cuts. There were so many cuts. She was pale too, all her color was gone and she looked like a ghost. 

Ashoka and I looked over into the next room where Master Anakin sat on the edge of the bed. His head was in his hands as a medical droid looked at his vitals. Everything was perfectly fine but they were confused. He was in the explosion and they didn't know how he was healed. I could feel his pain, not physical but emotional pain that he felt so much of. He cared too much for her but so did I.

Obi-Wan came jogging behind us after a few seconds and shook his head.

"You two shouldn't just take off like that."

Ashoka and I looked at each other and both said, "Sorry."

"It's alright, you remind me of a young Y/n and Anakin."

We smiled at each other, we both wanted to be just like our masters. I wanted to be kind yet fierce like my Master and Ashoka wanted to be witty yet skilled like hers. My master always seemed to find the right balance of everything and I wished to be like her.

A droid came out of Y/n's room and we all started at it. It looked at Obi-Wan and then down at a checklist. My heart pounded, waiting for them to say something.

"She has a pulse and she is alive." I exhaled and smiled, I would have her back, "but it's weak and she has suffered too many injuries to properly address her condition. Her probability of waking up is almost exactly 50 percent and if she does wake up she may not be the same."

Oh.

My smile faded as the realization hit me. I wouldn't know anything for a while and it killed me. Obi-Wan's eyes had tears at the brink,

"Will we be able to see her?"

"Eventually, once we get her stable."

The droid nodded and walked back inside. Obi-Wan looked at the ground before walking out without a word. He had known her so much longer than I had.

Ashoka walked over to Anakins door and looked back at me. I nodded and she knocked.

Her master's voice replied, "Come in."

It was saddening as if a part of it was missing. Ashoka opened the door and walked in.

"Master?"

"Hey Snips," He smiled lightly.

"How are you feeling?"

I walked in behind her and sat down in one of the white chairs.

"Physically? Perfectly fine, as the droids say."

"We talked to one of Y/n's medical droids."

He perked up at the mention of her name.

"He said that she's alive right now but not stable and they don't know much right now."

"Oh, okay."

He sank back down into the bed while Ashoka and I glanced at each other.

"So, when are you gonna get out of here?" She asked again.

"They said I need to wait a few minutes but then I'm free to go."

"Ok, I think we're supposed to be studying so we'll be in the library." She stood up and I followed.

"Okay, I'll see you later then." He smiled softly and we left.

When the door closed I looked at Ashoka, "He's not the same."

"None of us are."

"But do you see how much he cares?" I leaned forward trying to get her to see my point.

"Auren, they're not together. They wouldn't be allowed to be together anyway."

"I don't think the Jedi would like Master Y/n being close with her sister either, but she is."

"Auren," She grabbed my shoulders to stop me and I looked into her eyes, "She just got her sister back-"

"And we just got Master Y/n back! She deserves to be here right now. She shouldn't have sacrificed herself like that."

"She was trying to save my Master and she did."

"She saved him, she sacrificed herself for him. It's obvious! They love each other!"

Ashoka shook her head and looked at the floor.

"You're gonna tell the whole temple if you keep that up," She looked at me again, "Just let it go."

"I don't want to, they deserve to be happy."

"I know Auren, but they're happy like this, why else would they still be here? Maybe they do love each other, but we shouldn't tell anybody."

"Okay." I sighed and she took her hands off my shoulders, then began to walk, "so you really don't see it?"

"There is nothing to see Aur."

I sighed again and continued to walk with her to the library. I hated that she didn't see this, it was so obvious. Maybe one day Ashoka will see what I see.

Ashoka grabbed a book off of the little cart where she had left it a few days ago. She sat down and began to read about the Jedi code and morals. I went to the bookshelves to find a new book on all those things that I was supposed to learn.

I searched, I really did but I couldn't find any good ones. Or maybe I just didn't want to read about rules but anyway I left the library and heard Ahsoka sigh when I did. My mind still dwelled on my master and I didn't think that would stop any time soon. So I went to the one place I could think of, her room.

When I opened the door and it was the same as the last time I had been there. Y/n used to take Ashoka and I back here when we were done with our youngling lessons. We would mess around with books and play dress up. I walked into the room that smelled faintly of vanilla and sat down on the floor by her bed.

I placed my head into my hands and held onto my hair. She couldn't be gone, she was still here but I couldn't feel her. There was only a 50 percent chance of her waking up. How was I supposed to keep on hoping when I may get my heart shattered all over again? 

With tears in my eyes, I looked around the room. Her birch dresser with the mirror on top was the one I remembered having books inside of it. I crawled toward it and opened up one of the smaller drawers on the side. Little bottles and small items. I closed it and opened the middle drawer. A blanket and drawings.

Even though I didn't think I should've, I pulled the drawings and blanket out of the drawer and sat them on the ground. First I unfolded the blanket and looked at the designs. Flowers and speeders, Y/n didn't like flying but Anakin loved it. I smiled as I set it aside.

Next, I spread out the drawing on the floor. Some were flowers and a large tree from the garden. Then there were some amazing drawings of someone. Within a second I could tell it was a young Y/n, around nine, I assumed. She looked beautiful and was drawn as the spotlight of the whole galaxy.

Having no clue who could've drawn these, I put them back in the drawer and closed it. I searched the bottom one and found the books, all neatly organized inside the small drawer. I read the spines, 'The Story of a Lost Jedi', 'Differences complete us', and 'Breaking the Rules' were just a few. I chose the last one and set it down behind me before closing the drawer.

Scooting back, I laid the blanket over my lap and held the book in my hand. I opened it to the first page and began,

To any Jedi who many read this:

I loved and I was happy.

I turned the page,

Chapter 1: What do I do with feelings?

The Jedi don't teach you to deal with feelings, they suppress them. Jedi don't have feelings except for compassion. But I do, I have so many feelings that at times I cannot think straight...


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