As we were finishing our crepes, and mine had been reduced to mostly a mixture of pastry and delicious radioactive sludge, there was a loud buzz, and we were suddenly surrounded by the gentle sound of precipitation, the chirping of birds, and the thrum of the rainforest. In the distance was the call of some monkey or other. Confused, I momentarily looked around me, before it finally clicked:

Itsuki's phone was ringing.

She pulled it out of her pocket, glanced at the screen, and immediately blanched. Her hands trembling slightly, she slid out of her seat in our booth, and indicated to the smartphone.

"I... I have to take this."

Quickly, Itsuki walked away, pulling the phone up to her ear to talk with the caller as she went. I glanced over at Yotsuba next to me, who had a forlorn look on her face.

"What...?"

"It's probably our dad," she said, poking at what was left of her crepe. "He's gonna find out that a bunch of us were skipping our sessions with Takeda-san..."

"Oh," I said, taking another bite out of my crepe. "Hey, maybe he'll get fired?"

"Maybe..." Yotsuba said doubtfully. "I'd feel kind of bad if that happened though, Uesugi-san."

"Eh? Why?"

"Um, well..." Yotsuba paused to think. "He's not very nice... but Miku and Ichika didn't even give him a chance. And... and he only had a few weeks. When I think about how hard I had to work over two weeks just to make any progress... it was really, really hard! I don't think I could have done it just from being forced by someone else. It really had to come from me. So... um... ah, shoot, what am I trying to say?"

"Are you trying to say that you don't think he had a real opportunity to get you all to pass, even if you'd all gone to the sessions and studied diligently?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah!" Yotsuba said, pointing at me. "That's what I was trying to say! Good job, Uesugi-san!"

I frowned. "I suppose that's fair, as much as I don't like it. I'm worried about him holding you all back, though."

Then, a half-smile came to my face.

"Well, not you. I'm not really worried anymore on that front."

Yotsuba's face reddened slightly. "Eh? Uesugi-san? I--"

"Yotsuba?"

We both turned to see that Itsuki had returned, and was holding out her phone, a grim look on her face. Yotsuba blanched, and I slid out of the booth so that she could exit and grab the omen of incoming doom from Itsuki's hand.

"D-Dad?" she said nervously into the speaker, wandering off. Itsuki slid into the booth across from me, her face pale.

"So...?" I asked tentatively. "How'd it go?"

"How do you think?" she said, shaking her head. "He's unhappy. About the grades, of course, but more-so the skipping of tutoring sessions... though he also listened to what I had to say about Takeda-san's tutoring abilities. I think Yotsuba will get a pass, since she only skipped a couple of sessions, and also her grades were mostly fine. The others though..."

They're screwed.

She winced. "It's going to be a bloodbath when we get home. Our father is calling a family meeting tonight."

"A family meeting...?"

The concept of a formal 'family meeting' being a cudgel capable of producing this much dread was absolutely alien to me -- it took me a few moments to mull the concept over in my head before I could really process it. My own father had occasionally called such family meetings... but they were always about news he had, either good or bad. The idea of a meeting regarding their collective behaviour, formalized to the point of evoking such fear in the girl in front of me...

I seriously never want to meet this guy. Terrifying.

At that moment, Yotsuba returned, and handed Itsuki back her phone.

"Sorry, Uesugi-san," she said grimly. "We need to go now. Our dad wants us home within the next hour. He sounds really mad."

"Oh... ok," I said, my eyes widened. Part of me was worried for Yotsuba's sake, though I knew she'd probably be fine. Another part of me, a small, cowardly part, was grateful that I would be nowhere near that apartment during the coming meeting. "I guess... good luck?"

Yotsuba snorted. "Thanks, Uesugi-san."

"Look, I don't know what the right thing to say here is. Good luck? Kick ass? Fare thee well? Survive?"

"How about 'all of the above'?" Yotsuba questioned. "Yeah, that sounds about right. Anyways, Itsuki, Ebata-san will be here in five minutes with the car. We need to be outside."

"Eh?! Wait, I'm not done my crepe ye-- ugh, fine."

Yotsuba waved down the waitress, and asked for our bill. The waitress quickly brought it, and I briefly saw a flash of a piece of paper with at least one extra digit compared to what I'd expected. Yotsuba pulled out a flashy credit card, and tapped it against the machine. The sleek black plastic left me distinctly uncomfortable, and I had an overwhelming feeling that the credit limit on that thing was several times higher than the yearly rent for our apartment -- but I didn't really have time to ponder those feelings. As the waitress thanked us for eating in the restaurant, a familiar black car of foreign make pulled up outside.

Then, like a tropical storm sweeping across an island and then back out to sea, Itsuki and Yotsuba swirled out the front door, and then they were gone.

"Bye, Uesugi-san! See you tomorrow!"

Just like that, I was alone, my sole companion the remnants of my crepe, the emptiness of the table sudden and disconcerting.

Shrugging, I returned to the radioactive sludge.

For another twenty minutes, I stayed in the crepe shop, slowly savouring the free dessert. It wasn't often I was given the chance to be in a place like this... so I took full advantage of it. Finally, when I noticed the waitress beginning to give me side-eye, I elected to gracefully make my egress.

When I returned home, I opened the door to find that my sister was protesting loudly against the injustice of having to do homework, with my dad insisting that she sit and get it done. As soon as I walked in, my dad swung around and pointed at me dramatically.

"Fuutarou, give me some backup here! Raiha's gotta do her homework!"

"No! I don't wanna! I'm not doing my homework today!" she insisted, her arms crossed.

I just stared at her, then back at my father.

Sometimes I forget she's eleven...

"Raiha," I said, suddenly overcome with exhaustion, "you need to do your homework, or you're going to seriously regret it later."

"I don't wanna!"

"You have to."

Raiha pouted at me, but I just walked over and tousled her hair.

"Hey! Stop it, Onii-chan!"

I walked over to where my dad was sitting on the floor near the wall, and slid down next to him.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?" he asked, eyeing me up.

"Thanks for not being terrifying."

"I... what? Uh... you're welcome?"

I just nodded my head wearily, and my dad shared a confused look with Raiha.

"Onii-chan, what's going on with you?"

I leaned back, pressing further against the wall. "I'll tell you... if you do your homework."

"Unfair! That's blackmail, Onii-chan! Blackmail!"

I whistled innocently, and Raiha scowled at me.

"Fine. I'll do it. It had better be worth it, though!"

"Good," I smiled.

Raiha begrudgingly did her homework, which only took her about half an hour. When she was done, I told her all about my crepe... excursion, and also the trouble the quints had found themselves in. When I had finished, Raiha flopped on the tatami mat, and stared up at the ceiling.

"Hey, dad?" she said.

"Uh... yes?"

"Thanks for not being terrifying."

"You're welcome, I guess," he said, chuckling and shaking his head. "Their dad is that scary, huh? Guess you'll be cleaning up the mess tomorrow, kid."

"Well, maybe. Yotsuba passed four out of five exams; I suspect she's probably in the least amount of trouble."

My father raised an eyebrow. "You don't have any messes to clean up from the rest of them?"

I frowned at that. Somehow, in my head, I had partitioned my experiencing of the fallout to just Yotsuba and Itsuki.

"I guess... maybe? Itsuki's probably fine since she didn't skip any sessions, and I'm not as close with the other three, so I'm probably safe."

My dad shrugged. "If you say so, kid. Messes have a tendency to be messy."

There was something deeply unsettling about the way he said that, and even later that evening when we had put the table away and retreated to our respective futons, I found myself staring at the ceiling, trying to puzzle out what exactly he had been trying to imply. Try as I might, however, I couldn't put the pieces together.

The next morning, I arrived at school after being gently patted on the arm by Raiha and being wished luck -- a gesture which bewildered me. I, after all, wasn't the one who had been forced to face the terror that was Papa Nakano. I arrived at the gate a few minutes before the quintuplets, and it was as I was changing my footwear that they came through the front door.

I glanced over at them... then I took a double-take.

Itsuki and Yotsuba seemed alright, though they appeared tired. The other three, however, were in various stages of nervous breakdown. Miku in particular looked absolutely fried, though whether that was due to the 'family meeting' the night before or something else, I wasn't totally sure. As she walked by me, her eyes seemed almost glazed, and she didn't even seem to notice me.

She always seemed a little spacey... but this is extreme.

I lingered by the lockers until they'd all dispersed, and then hurried to catch up to Itsuki as she was striding down the hall.

"Hey, Itsuki. Good morning."

"Ah, Uesugi-kun," she said, stifling a yawn. "Good morning."

"So..."

"So?"

"...Damage report?"

Itsuki snorted. "Damage report is right. Well, as you probably anticipated... he was pretty mad. The thing about our father is, when he's angry, he's quiet. He doesn't rage or yell: he's completely silent. It's terrifying."

I shivered, visualizing it -- not that I'd ever seen the man's face.

"Anyways, he told Ichika, Nino, and Miku that if they skipped a single one of Takeda-san's sessions going forward, they would be banned from going on the school camping trip, and would instead be spending that weekend volunteering to pick up trash from alongside the river with members of the community."

"Huh, I guess he's pretty serious about that punishment..."

Then, I paused, my brain finally processing her words.

"Wait, Second Place-san still has his job?!"

Itsuki shrugged. "Apparently so. He told me that he's going to give Takeda-san a serious talking to about his pedagogy and his attitude -- but that given he'd only had slightly over two weeks to operate, and three-fifths of us skipped his sessions, he said that it wasn't a fair evaluation period. That said, our father told Takeda-san that if any of us failed the finals for this semester, he would be fired."

"Sheesh," I said, shaking my head. "That's harsh. It'd probably be kinder to just fire him now."

"Hey!" Itsuki said indignantly. "We can definitely pass the finals!"

I raised an eyebrow. "With the level of tutoring that Second Place-san is providing?"

"Ah," Itsuki said, a suddenly smug look springing up on her face. "See, I said the exact same thing to my father -- and he told me that if the pedagogy didn't improve within the next couple of weeks, I should let him know... and earlier steps could be taken."

"I see, I see," I said, nodding. "Crafty. So if he's a crappy tutor, you can get him fired early."

"Exactl-- wait, when you put it like that, it makes me feel like I'm being manipulative somehow."

"No, no, not at all -- your academic success is more important than his ego."

"I... guess that's true," Itsuki said, frowning slightly. "Either way, we'll see what will happen. Miku in particular is distraught -- she was apparently really looking forward to the school trip."

"Well, she can easily still go," I said, shrugging. "She just needs to not skip the sessions."

"You say that like spending four hours straight with Takeda-san is a trivial matter," Itsuki said drily. "I assure you, it is not."

"Was skipping really worth all this, though? I get that he's insufferable... but if she wants to go on the trip, sacrifices must be made. Though, to be frank, the fact that Miku refused to go at all always surprised me a little."

"Me too. Apparently it was a 'matter of principle' for her, whatever that means."

"I... see?" I said as we stepped into our classroom. "Wait, sorry, that was a lie -- I don't see at all."

Itsuki shrugged, retreating to her desk. "You'll need to ask her about it yourself."

I frowned. "It's way easier to just hound you, though."

"Shockingly, I don't always have all the answers, Uesugi-kun!"

"Well, rats," I said, sitting down at my desk. "There go my reconnaissance plans."

The teacher entered, and the day's lessons began. At lunch, Yotsuba ate lunch with her sisters, who appeared quite distraught -- especially Miku, who was more animated than I'd ever seen her. She seemed to be bemoaning something, presumably her new-found, self-inflicted situation. I returned to my studies -- while I had some sympathy, given my past encounters with her so-called 'tutor', I wasn't masochistic enough to go over and ask directly about her hangups -- especially with Nino beginning to enter what looked like a rant of her own.

I'd promised myself I wouldn't form a habit of getting yelled at by Nino, and damn it -- that was an oath I intended to keep.

As the afternoon session began, I found my attention flitting away, turning instead to speculating as to what Miku's motivations were. As I pondered, my eyes were drawn to the wildlife outside the window. I saw what I thought was a sparrowhawk swoop down with lightning speed, and then fly away again, some small creature or other ensnared in its talons. Its receding form faded into the distance, much akin to my focus in the lecture. The culprit was a combination of factors, I presumed -- my mastery of the material we were covering, my ongoing recovery from lack of sleep as caused by the previous two weeks of work, as well as the frankly monotone speech of our teacher. The man's pitch hardly wavered from a middle A -- it was almost impressive.

Almost.

At some point, the class representatives came up to the front of the room to talk about something, but given their chatter was usually as inane as the teacher's lecture had been monotonous, I hardly registered the transfer. My hands continued to write down the words being said, but my mind was elsewhere. The weather was slowly changing as we transitioned out of October and towards November. Leaves littered the ground like little patches of fire on the asphalt, and overhead, the last straggling birds were migrating south, including, presumably, the rogue sparrowhawk. Despite that, it was surprisingly warm that day -- approaching twenty degrees centigrade, perhaps.

"Alright, with Uesugi-san having been assigned a job, I think that's all of us spoken for!"

My head snapped back around to look at the front of the room.

"Huh?"

Immediately, I focused in on the chalkboard. It appeared as though tasks had been assigned for during the school trip. Hurriedly scanning the list, I saw with growing horror that I'd been assigned to the 'Test of Courage', a task which would invariably require a considerable amount of planning.

There was no other name there -- I'd have to do the whole thing myself.

Damn that bird!

"Hang on," I protested. "Wait, wait, wait. I never agreed to this!"

"Eh? Uesugi-san, when we asked you if you were ok to do it, you grunted -- wasn't that a yes?"

"Wait, what -- did I do that?"

I turned in my seat to look at Itsuki. She nodded her confirmation. I turned back around, betrayed. I glanced down at my paper, and saw, in my own handwriting, 'I'll plan the test of courage'.

Damn my unconscious note-taking skills!

"Can't I at least have some help? Making me do the whole thing by myself is a bit much, don't you think?"

"Everybody else already has their jobs though..."

The girl class rep turned back to look at the board... then turned back around, and shrugged her shoulders.

"Sorry, Uesugi-san. Maybe you can ask someone to volunteer?"

I scowled. Like anybody in this class besides Itsuki would possibly volunteer to help me.

Glancing over the board for her name, I saw that Itsuki had been assigned to cooking duty. My scowl deepened -- there was about a snowball's chance in hell that she would give that up to help me plan and execute a test of courage.

Damn it! Great. I'm screwed.

I slumped back in my seat, defeated by the spectre of soliciting support and invariably being rejected. The rest of the afternoon passed quickly, and I was thoroughly depressed by the time the day ended. Nevertheless, ideas for the test of courage were beginning to slowly flow through my head, unwillingly progressing with the blinding speed of frozen molasses.

As the bell rang, I loaded up my bags, and departed the classroom, deep in a funk. My head lost in the mechanics of planning a stupid test of courage, I rounded a corner on my way to the library to suddenly find a completely empty hallway. It took a moment for any thought to register, but then I slowly began to frown.

Huh, that's a bit odd at this time of da--

Suddenly, from around the corner at the far end of the hall swung a figure full-clad in camouflage slacks and shirt. On their face was a pair of aviator sunglasses, and swinging from their neck was a pair of dog-tags. In each of their hands was one of what appeared to be some kind of rifle; perhaps an AK-47, though I was hardly an expert on guns.

They looked for all the world like a stereotypical American commando... if commandos usually wore large green ribbons instead of helmets.

The commando swung the guns up to point directly at me, and charged down the hallway full-tilt.

"Eh, wait, what--"

She tore down the hall at a blistering speed, then threw herself into a roll, shooting right past me. I swung around to follow her, only to find her quickly rising to her feet and pressing one of the guns into my back, arresting my turn in its tracks.

"Hands over your head."

I immediately complied, raising my hands above my head.

"Alright, buster, into the classroom with you," a low voice said behind me. I could feel both guns pressing into the small of my back now. "You know what a POW is?"

"Uh... yes?" I said. The gun pressed harder against my spine.

"Well, you are one now. Get yer ass in there! Chop chop!"

I raised my hands further above my head. I walked over the door, and then frowned.

"Uh... how am I supposed to open the door without my hands?"

"Oh, shoot, didn't think of that!" my assailant said, briefly breaking character. "Um... ok, you can open it. Quickly, though!"

I rolled my eyes, lowered my hands, opened the door, raised them again, and walked in. My attacker walked in behind me, and closed the door behind her.

"Alright, sit yer ass down."

I went and sat, and then turned to see the gunner posing with her weapons.

"Best not move, or things'll get violent all up in here!"

I just raised an eyebrow.

"So... why have I been abducted?"

She sauntered over to me, pulled a chair out from a different desk, and swung it around to sit on it backwards.

"I've brought you here for one reason, and one reason only, punk."

Ah, hell. I'll play along.

"Is that so? Well, too bad. I'm never spilling my secrets, scumbag," I spat. "You'll get only two things out of me -- my name, and unit number. Uesugi Fuutarou, 1438. Go to hell."

She aimed the gun at me.

"We can do this the easy way, or the hard way. I don't wanna have to shoot you."

"Do it. I friggin' dare you. Do it! Go ahead and shoot me," I growled, leaning forward and pressing my forehead to the muzzle. "Make my day."

"You asked for it, kid," Yotsuba said, her ribbon waving. Then, she pulled the trigger at point blank range.

A small stream of water sprayed out, splashing down into my eyes.

"Oh-- Oh geez, sorry Uesugi-san!" she said, panicking and taking off the sunglasses. "I didn't realize these still had water in them!"

"Oh, god, my eyes!" I reeled, slightly playing it up -- though it really did sting. I didn't want to think about how long the water had been in there. "You fiend! You villain! This is a violation of the Geneva convention!"

"Eh?" Yotsuba blinked. "Uh, I mean -- muahaha! You fool, you should have talked when you had the chance! This is what a punk-ass kid like you deserves!"

Then, she handed me a handkerchief, and I gratefully wiped the dust-water out of my eyes.

"So," I said. "Why have I actually been abducted?"

"Oh, that's easy!" Yotsuba said brightly. "We're gonna plan all the fun things we're going to do during the camping trip!"

"Ah. I see."

A moment of silence.

"And... why the guns?"

"For the drama, Uesugi-san! The drama!"

I nodded. "I can appreciate that. Though, to be totally honest with you... I'm still not entirely convinced that I want to come to this thing. My class saddled me with solo responsibility of the test of courage, and I've never been to a single one of these before now. I have no idea what's involved. That said... since my classmates and I have a pretty strong mutual antipathy, I highly doubt I would enjoy spending time with them. So, I--"

"Vetoed."

"Eh?"

"Vetoed. You're definitely, positively, 100% coming!"

"Oh. Well, I guess that settles that then," I said. Then, I shook my head. "So why am I definitely, positively, 100% coming?"

"It's really important to me that you make as many fun memories as possible, Uesugi-san! I'm not letting you let this opportunity pass you by! We're going to grab this trip by the horns, and have the best time ever!"

I mulled that over for a moment. Do trips have horns?

"I suppose I... could take a bit of a break from studying to go on this trip. Begrudgingly. Since I'm literally being forced at gunpoint, after all."

"Yeah, you are!" Yotsuba cheered. "So you have to go, or I'm gonna shoot you again!"

I glanced down at my uniform. "I don't really feel like going home to change, so I suppose I have to comply."

Yotsuba grinned, and I could feel my weariness melt away like butter on a skillet.

"So," I asked, "what are we going to be doing, o' memory-making-meister?"

"Shi shi shi," Yotsuba said, rubbing her finger under her nose smugly. "I thought you'd never ask!"

She opened her bag, and whipped out a pile of papers. My eyes widened -- the pile was almost as thick as one of the binders I'd made her while we were studying for the midterms. I was certain I could see leaflets, notes on wildlife in the area... and something about a bear? A ghost bear?

When on earth did she have time to put this together? I was with her all the time before the midterms... this must have all been since then.

I shook my head at her sheer determination.

"Alright, so, on day one..."

We spent the next forty-five minutes hammering out a plan. The first day was simply arrival and set up, so we planned to meet after that was done and play cards in a common room sometime before light's out. The next day was the start of planned activities, and so we needed to plan things around the officially mandated events -- including my solo test of courage operation. Our list began to grow and grow, and soon I was beginning to worry that there wouldn't be a single moment not spent doing some activity or other.

Nevertheless... the planning itself was fun. Yotsuba's enthusiasm was highly infectious.

"Ooh, Uesugi-san, we should definitely go skiing on the last day!"

"Uh... that's the thing where you stick long wooden sticks to your feet and go down a hill at really high speeds, right?"

"Yeah!"

"I'll pass," I said, grimacing. "I've never tried to ski in my life -- I can guarantee you I'll injure myself, and probably at least three other people."

"Uesugi-san, are you saying that if we stick sticks to your legs, it'll turn into a mass casualty incident?"

"Yes," I said decisively.

"Gotcha," Yotsuba said, nodding. "Ok, I'm teaching you how to ski."

"Ok, now that that's out of the wa-- eh? Wait, I just said I'll hospitalize at least three people. Why are you--"

"That's why I'm gonna teach you, Uesugi-san!" Yotsuba said, grinning. "That way, you'll only hospitalize one person!"

"Myself?" I said drily.

"No, me! I'll take the fall for you, Uesugi-san. I've got your back! Anyways, lemme put that down on the list..."

An odd feeling swept over my chest, watching her write. I wasn't really sure what it was, but there was a part of me that was oddly resistive to the idea of skiing. The friction was unexpected... but I couldn't deny that it was there.

"Yotsuba, I'm actually really worried about this. I've never had the chance to do anything like skiing in my entire life before now."

She looked up from writing, and a concerned look crossed her face. Then, she smiled at me softly.

"There's really nothing to worry about, Uesugi-san. I'll teach you everything you need to know. You spent so much time teaching me... please, let me teach you."

I held eye-contact with her for a moment, and then finally sighed. Her blue eyes, which had the look of a begging puppy, had defeated me with ease.

When did I get to be so easy? Damn it.

"Fine, but if I cause skiers to go scattering like bowling pins, I'm holding you responsible."

"Hehe, deal!"

As Yotsuba continued to write, the sickly feeling in my chest simply wouldn't dissipate. I tried to suppress it, but... it just refused to go away. I frowned, staring down at the table, my mind silently turning inwards. What was the source of the discomfort? Why was I--

I ground my teeth in frustration as I realized the answer.

Oh god damn it. I'm still hung up on the difference in our wealth.. like there's some part of me that still secretly believes that when she really finds out how poor we are, she'll reject me. Skiing is a 'rich person thing', something we could never afford to do. This is stupid. She doesn't care: get over yourself, Uesugi Fuutarou. How many times have we had this exact same anxiety? Get out of your head, and--

"Hmm? Uesugi-san? What's wrong?"

I glanced up to see Yotsuba paused mid-page-flip.

"Nothing, I'm just caught up in my head. Don't worry about it. What else did you want to do?"

Yotsuba looked down at the half-flipped page, then looked back up at me. Her eyes narrowed.

"Hmmm, suspicious, Uesugi-san. Very suspicious."

"What is?"

"That look in your eye! I bet I know what you're thinking!"

My eyes widened, stunned. She couldn't possibly...

"You're thinking, 'Oh, there's no way Yotsuba's a good teacher, she's going to forget to teach me something basic like how to stop, and I'll cause a mass casualty incident leading to multiple manslaughter charges!' Don't think I can't tell, mister! I see it all in your eyes!"

I was momentarily rendered speechless by just how astronomically off the mark she was.

"I... wait, what? I hadn't even considered that you would forget to teach me how to stop -- but now I'm worried about it!"

"Hmph, don't be!" Yotsuba said, smugly. "When it comes to sports, I'm a teacher extraordinaire!"

"Oh, really?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "So you're not one of those naturals who explains everything via sound effects?"

"Uesugi-san, I am shocked. Appalled. I would never do-- I would never... I would..."

Yotsuba trailed off, and then her eyes glazed over as she stared into the middle distance.

"...I would totally do that, wouldn't I?" she asked numbly.

"...Well, at least you're aware of it," I nodded affirmatively. "Hey, it's alright. All that means is that you can spend some time before the trip thinking about how to explain it to an unathletic nerd like myself. Assume that every time you make a sound effect, my understanding goes down by five percent."

Yotsuba scrunched up her face. "Geez, Uesugi-san, this is going to be harder than I thought."

Something about her face made me start chuckling, and after a moment she joined me. We spent about twenty minutes more making plans, and then Yotsuba's phone buzzed. She pulled it out, and her eyes widened.

"Oh shoot, Uesugi-san, I forgot that we have a session with Takeda-san today. I need to hurry home. Luckily, this one got delayed a bit -- but I gotta run! Our camping trip plans are at stake! Bye!"

She hurriedly packed up her things, and bolted out the door. I watched her go with bemusement, and then stared down at the camping guidebook that Yotsuba had given me. Slowly, I picked the thing up, and began to leaf through it.

If I'm going to go on this trip... I should make sure I'm fully prepared.

I spent the next thirty minutes reading through and marking up the book, taking note of any solo activities I would be interested in, as well as reading up on the activities Yotsuba had indicated she wanted to do together. Before I knew it, I had received my usual email from Raiha telling me to come home. Packing up my bags and heading down to the footlockers, I realized with a start that I hadn't gotten any studying at all done that day.

"Maybe I should treat this as its own kind of studying," I murmured to myself.

On my way down, I happened to pass by the board where the midterm grades were posted. Normally, I didn't bother to check it; with my perfect scores, I always knew I was number one, so there wasn't much point in looking. As I passed by, I glanced up, and my supremacy was confirmed. My gaze twitched down a spot, and then my eyes widened slightly, before my mouth curled into a smirk.

The number two student wasn't Takeda Yuusuke.

Second Place-san was, alas, Second Place-san no more.

Hello, Fourth Place-san. Perhaps you should have spent less time harassing people, and more time studying.

As I continued walking through the hallways, I happened to pass by the classroom in which Nino had made her refuge. Glancing inside, I was relieved to see that she wasn't there. While I had no desire to get yelled at again, I also hoped that this meant that she was actually attending the session with the former Second Place-san... and making him quiver in his boots.

Maybe I'm more vindictive than I thought... I mused to myself as I changed my footwear. The guy's a jerk, but I don't think even he deserves the full wrath of Nino... or at least, no more than once. Maybe twice.

Then, I grinned to myself.

Alright, fine, I'll allow thrice.

The next day, as I entered the classroom, I was surprised to see Itsuki looking quite chipper.

"You seem happy about something," I said as I swung by her desk. "What's up?"

"Oh, good morning, Uesugi-kun," she said, smiling up at me. "We just had a great session last night, and I'm feeling pretty good about it!"

"You... had a great session?" I asked, disbelievingly. "With who, Second Place-san's ghost?"

"Pretty much," Itsuki said, smirking slightly. "He was so shocked by the results of the midterms that he barely said a word the entire time he was there. It was the most productive tutoring session we've had to date."

"That's really sad," I said, frowning. "Which part in particular was he shocked about?"

"Take your pick. The fact we all failed almost every subject... the fact that he got an official reprimand from our father... the fact that he was told that we have the power to fire him if his pedagogy doesn't improve... the fact his own grades suffered with no apparent payoff..."

"Ah, I see -- so, as expected, Nino, Ichika, and Miku didn't do very well on the midterms."

"Miku did the best of the three," Itsuki said, frowning, "but she still failed everything except social studies. The other two essentially did the same. The only one who didn't fail almost everything was Yotsuba -- but of course, you know that already."

"How did Second Place-san take that, by the way?"

"Guess," Itsuki smiled up at me.

"Uh... was he furious?"

"Bzzzt. Try again."

"Hmm. Did he accuse her of cheating?"

"Shockingly, bzzzt! Incorrect. Try one last time."

I threw my hands up in a plea for mercy. "Itsuki, I have absolutely no idea. As far as I was aware, those were his only two modi operandi. I don't know, did he honestly congratulate her, and vow to do better in the future?"

Itsuki snorted. "No, of course not. Oh, wait, right -- bzzzt! He simply refused to mention it: he just seemed to go catatonic every time it was brought up, staring into the distance as though his entire life's plan had shattered before his eyes. It was kind of pathetic, to be frank."

"Hmm," I mused. "That's interesting. Maybe there's an opportunity here."

"An opportunity?"

"If he's taking it that harshly, maybe you can strike while the iron's hot. He'd reached the position he had for a reason -- maybe, hidden under the layers of slime, there's a real tutor in there. If you chip away at the shell, maybe you'll strike gold?"

Itsuki gave me a skeptical look. "I mean, I can give it a shot... but I don't know about that, Uesugi-kun. Also, you're kind of mixing your metaphors there."

"Eh? I never mix my metaphors. I have no idea what you're talking about."

"No, you did -- you can't chip away at slime."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I repeated, walking away.

"You did! You definitely did! Argh, don't gaslight me, Uesugi-kun!"

Chuckling, I sat down at my desk. The teacher soon entered, and the lecture began. Bombarded with the dulcet tones of chalk on porcelain enamel, my eyes wandered to the top-right corner of the blackboard, where the list of jobs for the trip was sequestered in a white box. My name, alone next to the test of courage, reignited my sense of indignation, and I scowled around at my classmates, who were in various stages of attentiveness.

Well... if I'm definitely, positively, 100% going to be going on this trip... I'd better do it right.

I stretched my hands out in front of me, cracking my knuckles.

I'm going to scare the absolute hell out of these cretins. They won't know what hit 'em.

Then, I paused, as an idea finally struck me. In hindsight, it was so painfully obvious, I wasn't sure why it had taken me an entire day to think of it. I didn't have to do everything entirely alone -- there was someone I could ask for help planning the test of courage.

I'm an idiot. Of course she'll help.

Whipping out my phone under the desk, I shot an email to Yotsuba.

Time to call in the cavalry.