"Eun Kyung, are you okay?"

I sit there frozen, my pulse racing. Eomma looks at me worriedly as my tears continue to fall.

"What happ- what is that?" She asks, her eyes falling on the photo in my hands.

I swallow nervously. "N-Nothing."

"Where did you find that?" Eomma asks and her voice becomes higher.

"When did you plan on telling me?" I ask shakily.

She stiffens. "Eun Kyung, believe me, I was going to tell you soon. But you're still young and I wanted to wait-"

"I'm sixteen! How much older did you want me to be? How long did you plan on hiding this from me?"

"Please just listen to me." Eomma begs and grabs me by the shoulders.

I avoid her pleading eyes.

"I was afraid," She starts weakly. "That once you found out I wasn't your real mom, you'd forget about me. I was afraid about how you'd react. Because this whole time you've been left in the dark."

She starts to cry. "I'm sorry. You've been through so much and there's nothing I can do to ease the pain."

"W-What happened to them?" I ask.

She looks away. "Eun Seol... she passed away."

My eyes brim with tears. "How? Why?"

Eomma chokes back a sob. "She died giving birth to you."

I crumple down. "What?"

"I'm sorry." Eomma cries.

I clutch my stomach, suddenly feeling sick. The reason my mother died... is because of me.

"You would have loved her. She was so beautiful. She was the kindest person I knew. You act just like her. If she saw you she'd be so proud."

"You knew her?" I manage to ask.

Eomma nods. "She was my little sister."

"What about my dad?"

She shrugs. "I don't know. After Eun Seol died, he lost it. He was consumed by grief. Drinking day in and out. That's why I took custody of you."

I wipe away my tears. "I-I need some fresh air. I want to be alone right now."

"Eun Kyung," She grabs my hand.

I shake my head. "Please."

She hesitantly let's go. I walk out, passing by my grandparents and ignoring their calls. I don't even bother putting on shoes as I slip out the door. My tears once again blind me as I aimlessly walk.

I watch as the sky darkens. A beautiful blue turns into a murky grey. Thunder rolls and the first drops fall. The oncoming storm represents my exact feelings.

People around me begin to scurry, looking for shelter. But I continue to walk. If I don't do something, I'll be swallowed by the emotions inside of me. I don't want to deal with it. I don't want to think about it.

I love eomma and halmoni and harabuji, but I can't help but wonder what life with my real parents would be like. To wish for that, am I being selfish? Finally putting a face to those two people, it finally let me realized how much I longed to have them.

How can you miss someone you don't know? I now understand that. Because I feel their absence, I miss them. Like a puzzle piece is missing.

Do I even deserve to be alive? I took away a life in order to be born. Is it right for me to have lived such a carefree life? I should be ashamed of myself.

My dad must have been so disgusted with me for having killed the person he loved. That's why he couldn't face me. That's why he left me. I'm so repulsive.

Everything they said is true. I'm a horrible person. I can't even appreciate the person who's been with me this whole time. If I dissappear, maybe everyone will be happier.

I trip on something and fall, collapsing onto my knees. I lay there. Looking like a crazy person wearing only one slipper. By now, I was drenched by the rain. And it only continued to pour. I hug my knees to my chest and bury my head in them. I sob for what feels like forever. Until I can no longer cry and pass out.

*

I wake up groggily in an unfamiliar bed. Something cold and wet lays on my forehead. I reach for it, realizing it's a small towel.

I turn on my side, coming into contact with a hard surface. My eyes widen then soften when I see Jung Kook's sleeping form. He has a worried crease on his forehead. I sigh.

"Did I worry you? Mianhae." I whisper.

"Things just seem so hard right now. It hurts so much. I'd much rather be beaten black and blue than feel this pain." I say brokenly.

"There are so many things I want to tell you." I continue as I watch him sleep soundly. "So many thoughts are running through my head. For some reason, I feel so alone. My heart hurts. But with you by my side, it eases."

"Can you promise you won't ever leave me? I'm scared you'll leave and forget me in this glamorous life you live. Stay by my side, please."

A tear runs down my cheek, falling onto his nose. His arms suddenly wrap around me, tightly hugging me to his chest.

"Didn't I already tell you? I'm not going anywhere." Jung Kook mumbles into my neck.

I sniffle as I clutch onto his shirt. "Gosh, I'm such a crybaby, aren't I?"

"I'll just kiss your tears away." He says softly.

I blush. "I thought you were sleeping."

"I wasn't. I just closed my eyes now after your fever broke. You just kept burning up, and mumbling things in your sleep. You almost gave me a heart attack when I found you. What were you doing out there?"

I evade Jung Kook's eyes. "I wanted to forget."

"You said you want to tell me these things, but you won't. I hate seeing you like this."

I bury my face into his chest. "It still hurts too much. If I speak, I'll just fall apart."

Jung Kook strokes my hair. "You have to tell me. That way I can help take away the pain."

"Eomma...she isn't really my birth mother. And maybe I'm making too big of a deal out of this, but I can't handle it. She hid something so big from me. It feels like she doesn't trust me. Maybe I don't deserve her trust. Because I can't help but imagine a life with my birth parents. I feel guilty." I confess.

He shakes his head. "You shouldn't feel guilty. It's only natural. I'm sure she would understand."

"What really hurts... is that I'm the very reason I don't have my real parents. I-I killed her, my mom. She died giving birth to me. That's all I can think about. If I hadn't been born, she would be alive. She'd have a happy life with my dad. They'd probably have more kids and grow old together. I took that away. How could I do that?"

Jung Kook grabs me by the shoulders and forces me to look at him. My eyes widen at his action and the strong look in his eyes.

"Don't think like that. This is not your fault. Sometimes things happen and there's nothing we can do. So don't blame yourself. Your mother wouldn't want that. There are so many people who care about you. Think about them. What would they do without you? What would I do?"

"Jung Kook..."

He puts his head down. "Promise me you won't think like that. You're such a precious person... so please."

I hug him tightly. "I'm sorry."

Jung Kook rests his head on my shoulders as I continue to repeat that. I feel something warm and wet and realize he's crying. It's then I really feel my heart break.

I take his face in my hands. I stare at his red brimmed eyes. I shut my eyes and close the gap between us.

It's then that door suddenly bursts open and six boys topple over each other as they fall on the ground. Immediately I jump away from Jung Kook and inevitably becoming entangled in the bed sheets. I flail my arms in the air as I fall backwards, landing on the ground with a loud thud.

"Eun Kyung!" They all scream in unison.

I open my eyes and find all seven members of BTS peering down at me worriedly. I rub the back of my head.

"Ow." I say.

"Look at what you did. This is exactly why you're the god of destruction." Suga yells. "Next time just break down the entire door."

"You were leaning on the door too. All of you were!" Rap Monster argues.

"Were you two doing something naughty?" J Hope asks.

My face reddens and I look away. J Hope screams.

"They were! Look at her face! No, we must protect Eun Kyung's innocence at all costs."

"Why do you make me sound like a pervert? It was just a kiss, which she initiated. Just saying." Jung Kook says.

I punch his shoulder. "Yah, don't say that."

Ji Min grabs the back of his neck. "Eun Kyung, why?"

"I can't wait to be an uncle. I want the kids to call me Tae Tae. Omo, this is making my heart race." V says and covers his cheeks.

I instantly blush. My face turning the color of a tomato.

Jin hits him. "Yah, don't say that! Eun Kyung is right there."

"Ji Min was saying it too." V pouts.

"W-Was not." Ji Min weakly defends. "Eun Kyung, take your time. Graduate high school first. Then go to college, it should be in the top 3 in the nation by the way, and get a good job. Then you two can get married. We can start thinking about your children then."

My jaw drops. Jung Kook glares at Ji Min.

"You sound more and more like a mom." Suga mutters.

"I though we agreed in chapter Twenty I was her mom, and also the favorite one out of three." Ji Min says and coughs the last part.

J Hope crosses his arms. "When did we agree on that?"

Ji Min shrugs. "I thought it was a mutual understanding."

"Maybe we should just go." Jung Kook whispers in my ear.

"Where would we go?" I whisper back.

"Stop whispering amongst yourselves." J Hope sasses.

"Sorry." We both mutter.

"I thought Eun Kyung said there wasn't a favorite." Jinsays.

Rap Monster scoffs. "That's a lie. Just look at the way she looks at Jung Kook."

The blood rushes to my cheeks. "W-What do you mean by that?"

"Eun Kyung, please."

I shut up as my face further reddens. Being around the boys had let me forget my worries. Even if only momentarily.

Jin pinches my cheek. "What's up the long face? Cheer up. "

I give a small smile.

"Who's up for some jjimjilbang?" Rap Monster asks.

"Ooh, me. We haven't gone in forever." J Hope says.

I frown. "Won't you guys get recognized?"

"Don't worry, we know a special place." Suga assures me.

Just like that we all decide to go to the sauna. Immediately the guy at the register greets the boys. They all do this weird hand shake and I just stare at them in confusion.

The guy looks at me. "Ah, you are the lovely Lee Eun Kyung, correct? The girl who swept Jung Kook off his feet and got rid of his girl complex. Pleasure to meet you, the name's Q."

"Q?" I ask.

"That's what my friends call me. Anyways, here are the locker keys and your clothes. Girls on the left. Enjoy yourself guys."

"Meet us at the food court." Rap Monster says to me.

"Oh," Ji Min stops me. "You'll see a lot of celebrities so don't freak out or anything."

My eyes widen in surprise but I nod. I head to the woman's changing room and get dressed into the matching pink shorts and shirt. I lock up my belongings and tie up my hair.

When I get to the food court the seven of them are already waiting for me.

"Sorry. Did I take long?" I say.

They shake their heads. I smile. I had considerably cheered up from before. I knew they were trying to make me feel better but at the same time not wanting to pry. I appreciated it.

"Eun Kyung, Jung Kook, and I will get food for everyone. Nam Joon, Yoon Gi, and Ho Seok go get drinks. And you two go find a comfortable spot for us." Jin instructs."

"Aww, but I want to go with Eun Kyung." V pouts.

"I have spoken." Jin says.

V grumbles before leaving with Ji Min. The other three go to get drinks.

"Hmm, what should we get?" I ask.

"Whatever you want." Jung Kook smiles.

My eyes widen. "A-Anything?"

He nods.

"How are we going to pay?" I question.

He chuckles. "Don't worry about that. Hyung, show her."

Jin reaches into his pocket and pulls out a shiny silver card.

"Do you know what this is?" Jin asks.

I shake my head.

"A company card." They both say in awe.

"Wah. Then, is it okay if I don't hold back."

Jung Kook snorts. "You weigh less than fifty kilograms, how much could you eat?"

I cross my arms. "More than you think."

Jin chuckles. "Alright you two. We're next in line. What do you want Eun Kyung?"

I look at the menu. "Four hardboiled eggs, jjajangmyeon, dumplings, two sweet breads a bad of Hot Cheetos."

Jung Kook, Jin, and the cashier all look at me in surprise.

"Are you sure you're going to eat all that?" Jung Kook asks.

I nod. "I'm starving. And what better way to forget your worries than by eating them away?"

Jung Kook and Jin proceed to order for themselves and the rest of the members. Let's just say the total was a bit pricy. Good thing we're using the Big Hit company card. But why does it feel like we're taking advantage?

The cashier smiles and bows politely as we try to gather up all the food.

"Um, I can get someone to help you." She offers.

"That'd be great." Jin says thankfully.

She dials someone and soon two other employees appear. With the power of two extra people we're able to carry all the stuff. She stops us. She faces Jung Kook and a blush creeps up her cheeks.

"Uh, Jung Kook. I'm actually a big fan of yours. Do you think I could get a hug?"

A sudden pang of anger wells up in me. I find myself glaring at her without even realizing. Am I... jealous? No, no way.

Jung Kook stares at me questioningly. Jin coughs awkwardly.

"Thanks for being my fan but, I don't think a hug would be appropriate." He says.

Her face falls. "O-Okay. But, can I ask why?"

"I have a girlfriend. It's this girl right here. And as you can see, it looks like she's jealous." Jung Kook continues.

She looks at me in bewilderment. "You mean, the rumors are true?"

He nods. "Yeah. I hope you can support us."

He takes my hand and walks away. Jin bows and trails behind us. The whole time I avoid looking at Jung Kook. My face is so red, kyaa!

"Yah, what did you do to her?" J Hope questions.

"What do you mean?" Jung Kook asks.

"Look at her face. Eun Kyung, are you okay?"

I nod weakly.

"Are you sure? You don't look too good." Ji Min says.

Rap Monster rolls his eyes. "You guys are making it worse. Let's just eat, I'm hungry."

I mentally thank him. I sit down on the floor and quickly dig in. They all momentarily stare at me before going back to their own food. After we finish eating we go into one of the sauna rooms, then to a pc room and lastly we watch tv. I was in the middle of arguing over how W was the best drama curently on air with Jin when someone joins the conversation.

"I disagree. Actually, I think Doctors is the best drama airing right now."

My eyes widen. That voice. There's no way. I turn around and come in contact with none other than the actor himself.

"You're... Lee Jong Suk." I breathe.

He smiles brightly. "Yes I am. I've never seen you before. You are...?"

"L-Lee Eun Kyung." I stutter, almost forgetting my own name.

"Pleasure to meet you. Has anyone ever told you you've got beautiful eyes?"

I blush. "Uh, no."

Next to me I can practically feel the jealousy coming off of Jung Kook in waves. Not to mention the nasty glares the boys were giving him.

"Well you do. Are these your friends? Bangtansonyeondan, right?"

I nod and shyly ask,"Yeah. Um, oppa, would you mind taking a picture with me? I'm ahuge fan."

He smiles. "No problem."

"V oppa, can you take the picture please?" I ask.

He glances back at Jung Kook but takes my phone. Jong Suk puts his hand casually on my shoulder and leans his face towards mine. Jung Kook's jaw clenches.

"Say kimchi." V says.

"Kimchi!" We both say.

I bow. "Thank you so much. I really like your work. Keep working hard. Hwaiting!"

He chuckles. "Thanks. Maybe I'll see you around?"

Jung Kook finally stands up. He grabs my hand and pushes me behind me.

"We have to go now. Eun Kyung, say goodbye to Mr. Lee." He says sternly.

"Bye." I bow again.

The rest of the boys begrudgingly bow to him and surround my side as we walk away. I come to a sudden stop.

"Are...are you jealous?" I ask.

Jung Kook snorts. "Pft. No. Why would I be jealous? You're already mine. That Lee Jong Suk guy is too cocky. I don't like him."

I laugh. "You are so jealous."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Alright, lovebirds. That's enough. I think I'm gonna puke." Suga cuts in.

"Sorry." I mumble.

"He was totally jealous." Ji Min whispers.

Jung Kook glares at him while we all just laugh.

"You know whay, I think I'll go gve that a fan hug. She seemed really sad about it." Jung Kook says snottily.

I grab his arm. "Mianhae, mianhae."

He sticks up his chin. "If you keep getting all smitten by handsome actors I'll have to punish you."

I gasp. Jin slaps his arm.

"Yah, whatever you're thinking stop."

"That sounded so wrong." Rap Monster mutters.

"That's it, date time is over. Separate!" J Hope yells and stands in between us.

Jung looks apalled. "I can't believe... you guys... how could you, just forget it."

My eyes widen, suddenly understanding what they were saying and I take a step away from them.

"Eun Kyung, that's not what he meant." Ji Min says assuringly.

"Yeah, I'd kill him if he tried anything." Suga backs him up.

"Again, I am the victim here!" Jung Kook yells.

"No one cares." The six of them reply.

"I do." He mutters.

Rap Monster's phone rings. He picks it up and immediately starts speaking formally. When the call ends he turns to us.

"That was sajangnim. He wants to talk to us."

"Is it because of the credit card? Does he know already? I knew I should've gotten less food." I say nervously.

He ruffles my hair. "Don't worry. It's not that. But we really have to go."

I nod glumly. "Oh, alright."

"Will you be okay?" Jung Kook asks worriedly.

I nod and give him a smile. "Of course, I'm a big girl."

He gives me a hesitant look but nods. We all get dressed and pay. Their manager was ready waiting for them outside. Jung Kook hugs me.

"Call me if anything happens."

I nod. "I will."

"Eun Kyung-ssi, do you want me to drop you off at home?" Their manager asks.

I shake my head. "No thank you. I don't want to cause any inconvenience."

He shrugs. "Alright."

Jung Kook turns back to me. "Are you sure you'll really be fine."

"Yeah."

With that they finally say goodbye and leave.

I lied. I wasn't going to be fine at all. Because now I was suddenly back to reality.

============================
A/N: extra long chapter, yay. I hope Eun Kyung doesn't seem bipolar. And I also hope you're not annoyed with her or think she's blowing things out of proportion. I tried to include include a few cute scenes. Hope you liked this.

Annyeong

(P.s may contain grammatical errors.)