It was time for The Landlord to do another inspection on one of his buildings.

It was true that The Landlord had had a rough beginning with the tenants at the start of the Tenancy. They had messed with His stuff, after He had asked them quite politely DO NOT TOUCH. 

Consequently, He had  decided that they were not suited to the premium property He had originally offerred them. He had instead ushered them out to one of his cheaper properties. 

Look after this property, and I will consider letting you back to Paradise, He had told them.

There was that business with the flood. Water everywhere. That was after they had messed up again. The Landlord had been forced to clean up and wash it all away. 

He thought He had been clear.

Look after My animals. 

The animals had not been created to look similar to The Landlord, as the tenants had been. They had been experimental, interesting, brutal, beautiful. The Landlord was curious to see how they would evolve over time. 

He had been bored with the dinosaurs. Around for so many years and they just didn't get any more civilised. He decided to get rid of most of them and start again. 

He kept the birds. Birds were so pretty.

This time He created some creatures in His own image. He hoped that giving them a head start would get them evolving into good worthy creatures that He could be proud of.

Certainly they would evolve faster than the dinosaurs did.

So far, they had surprised Him. Some things were unexpected.

The tenants seemed to squabble a lot. Strange, when all of them were related. 

He guessed that was part of Human family living.

He had sent many messangers over the years to the tenants. Some had been respected. Some had been treated appallingly. Most of them had been ignored. 

He had guided a few brighter Humans to ways that would help all of them live a better life. For instance, at the beginning He had told them to populate the world, but now they were enthusiastically becoming over-crowded. Thus, He had pointed out Birth Control to a few of the real Thinkers.

Unfortunately, the Thinkers tended not to be the Leaders. An interesting development  in Human evolution. 

Charisma was respected more than Intelligence.

Strange, after all that trouble with Adam and Eve.

There was that business with His Son. They had not treated Jesus well. 

He had been tempted to wash everyone clean again.

But He'd promised not to. There was that rainbow to consider.

At least Jesus had put the message out there. Again. Follow My rules, and that premium property was still up for grabs.

But after the way Jesus had been treated, well, He hadn't sent anyone else down for a while.

He sent a nudge, here and there, to Humans he deemed worthy.

The men and women who claimed to know Him best were usually the ones with the most closed ears of all. Or so fricking old they were barely conscious.

It had been a couple of thousand years.

It was time for The Inspection.

No point trying to send a messenger. That hardly ever worked.

Time to put on a show.

After all, it was in the Tenancy Agreement.

Thus, He sent ahead seven angels with seven trumpets.

If that didn't give them enough warning, nothing would.

Sure, it woke Satan up, and he would cause some mischief. But The Landlord recognized Satan's work, when He saw it. He'd see through all that easy enough.

All would be O.K. for the tenants if the place was tidy and looked after. Paradise was waiting.

                                                                    **************

The air was filthy.

The water was sludge.

The Earth was trashed.

People were everywhere, living like microbes. All over His beautiful planet.

Where were His trees?

Where were His animals?

He picked up a rhinocerous. Her horn had been hacked from her face. Her calf had died from lack of food. The two souls were sorrowful.

There was a man standing by, crying. 

Well, at least there were some decent tenants, but the majority...

Anger was rising.

He looked around.

He found seven rhino. Three of them had two horns. HA!

Even he hadn't expected that. How convenient.

Seven rhino were all He could find. He loved His rhinocerous. Such a mighty, silly kind of beast. One of His favourites. How could rhino be so nearly extinct?

The more He looked, the more WRATH He felt.

So many animals were gone, or about to go. And the rubbish! Pollution! Disgusting! How could His tenants live like this? What was wrong with them?

It wasn't good enough.

Paradise would have to wait. Not many of this lot were going to be let in. He'd have to judge each one carefully. It would take time. 

Adam and Eve had eaten the apple of knowledge, so The Landlord knew that ignorence was no excuse. The tenants had proven to be a huge disappointment. They were about to be evicted.

Satan had plenty of room downstairs. See how they like a slum landlord? It was all they deserved.

Maybe He would let the dinosaurs have another go.

Birds are so pretty. They could continue evolving, He decided. Birds could stay.

They reminded Him of His angels. He called them up to the sky.

Down on the ground, people were screaming and running and hiding, but there was no escape.

The Apocalypse had begun.