We park in front of Danielle's house, and I text her to let her know. And I wait until she climbs into the backseat, taking a seat beside me. 

"Hi!" she exclaims, pulling me into a tight side-hug. "Thanks for saving from that chaos in there. You're the only one she'd let me leave for."  

I smile. "That's because she loves me. And, I think a little bit of that is because she pities me," I reply, my voice muffled against her shoulder.

As we pull away, she shakes her head. "She doesn't pity you. Don't be ridiculous."

I stay silent as Alex drives away from her house.

"You know," she says, "you've just always been around. She sees you as a second daughter. That's all."

I shrug, "maybe." 

I sink into the plush leather seat. She sees me as a second daughter, she says. Yet, I know a part of her, no matter how small and insignificant that part may be, that feels bad that I lost my own at such an early age. 

Beside me, Danielle breaks the silence with a soft sigh, "you seem distant. What is it?" 

"I just... it made me think of her," I shrug. 

Danielle reaches out, squeezing my hand, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... you know."

I smile, sighing, "it's okay. I just miss her."

Danielle's hand feels warm against mine, "that's only natural. She was your mom." 

"It's been so long," I murmur, my voice barely above a whisper. "Sometimes it feels like she's just... a distant dream."

Danielle nods in understanding, her gaze soft with empathy. "But she wasn't a dream. I mean. The only way you could be alive..." she begins jokingly, making me giggle. "But she's always with you, Sophia. As long as you remember her, she'll never truly be dead. She'll live with you."

I offer her a grateful smile, "thank you," I say, my voice choked with emotion. She squeezes my hand gently, before letting it go. "Any animals you're excited to see?" she asks with a soft smile. 

I shake my head. "I've been there like a billion times. I should be asking you that question."

She lets out a snort of a chuckle, "I suppose. But you know I love capybaras. I don't even know if they have them."

I press my lips together, thinking for a second, "I don't think they do, no."

"Damn it," she blurts.

"Language!" Alex scolds from the driver's seat. Probably under the demands my oh-so-charming mr. daddy. 

"As if you don't cuss," she bites back, making him smirk, evident through the reflection of the rearview mirror. "Thought so," she finishes. 

I find myself lost in the rhythmic motion of the car, my thoughts drifting back to memories of my mother... that last time. I should've... I shake the thought. Now is not the time to cry. Today is supposed to be fun, and I don't want to ruin it.

As we approach the zoo, a sense of bubbles build up within me, pushing aside the melancholy. I love the zoo. I love every animal except for the snakes. Eww, snakes. 

I glance over at Danielle, "thanks for joining me. Without you I'd be stuck with... you know," I say tilting my head in Alex's direction. 

"You think you're sneaky, huh? You're not," he replies coldly, giving me the side-eye. 

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be mean."

He smirks, shaking head, "of course you didn't. You're Raphaelle's girl. It's in the package." 

We close in on the entrance. "What do you mean by that?"

He turns his gaze to me, raising his brows. "You're not stupid Sophia. Neither am I. Everyone in his circle know he likes good obedient girls. It's just who he is." 

His words hang in the air, leaving me with a sense of unease. I've always known there was a certain expectation placed upon me by Raphaelle, but hearing it voiced so plainly by Alex makes me feel... I don't know, less special? I don't like that feeling. 

Before I can dwell on his words any further, we reach the entrance of the zoo, and Danielle and I wait like children behind Alex as he pays for our entrance. 

As we make our way inside, the sounds of exotic birds fills the place. I feel a sense of liberation wash over me. Gosh... I freaking love animals. Especially those tiny ones. They're so cute and fluffy I just wanna squish them into my chest like my squishmallow. 

"You can't wait, can you?" 

I look at her with a smile on my face. "No! You know how much I love animals!" I say skipping and jumping through the pathway.

Scanning the map on the wall, I accidentally clap hands, awkwardly shoving them behind my back. "Let's go to the Flamingos! They're just right over there!" I say overly-enthused, pointing straight ahead. Alex shakes his head. "Definitely Raphaelle's girl." 

"You just have to make her feel bad about herself, don't you? Not cool," Danielle scolds him, rolling her eyes. 

His hand raises up, arms shaking back and forth in the air- the Italian exclamation mark deluxe. "I just... forget it. I just... it's cute." 

Wait, what? Is he calling me cute now? Alex has some serious personality issues. One day he's rude and the next day he's calling me cute? Why? Raphaelle would flip if he heard him say something like that. He's very possessive over me. 

We make our way over to the flamingos.

We reach the enclosure filled with the beautiful colorful array of birds. I smile as I admire the group, their graceful movements mesmerizing as they wade through a shallow pool. 

"I've always loved flamingos," I muse aloud, watching as they dip their heads beneath the water in search of food.

Danielle chuckles, "I know. You've always had a thing for anything pink."

I roll my eyes playfully, nudging her shoulder. "Hey, pink is a pretty color!"

She laughs, shaking her head. "Anyway what's occupying Raphaelle today?"

I look down for a second, "I-I don't know."

She nods understandingly, "so he's doing some things he shouldn't be doing then." 

I giggle, "he's always doing things he shouldn't be doing."

Alex shakes his head at us both. "You done looking at these fucking birds soon?"

And he's back to being rude. Why does he have to be so abrasive? Why can't these occasional outbursts of kindness just be constant?

"She's done when she's done, Alex," Danielle retorts, shooting him a pointed look.

He huffs in response, crossing his arms over his chest and glancing away. Clearly, he's not in the mood for this. I know he isn't. Watching over me isn't the job that he wanted. Though ever since the shooting, it's become better. 

Ignoring his sour mood, I turn my attention back to the flamingos. They really are beautiful creatures.

Alex's impatience disturbs me, and so reluctantly I turn on my heels, wandering off and away from the pretty birds.

I let my gaze wander, taking in the sights and sounds of everything around me. I smile. This is a good day. It would've been better without Alex chained to my feet. But it is what it is, I guess. 

Danielle catches up to me, her footsteps light as she falls into step beside me. "Where next?" she asks.

"The Kangaroos and Koalas? And before you even dare ask, the answer is no." I say, walking in the direction of the lair, also known as the home of the snakes. No thanks. 

"The answer is no to what?"

I point my head at the building. "I know you like reptiles," I shrug. 

She nods as she takes it in. "But you hate them. I wouldn't even suggest it."

We reach the Australian exhibit, and the unmistakable silhouette of the muscled beasts comes into view. And looking at them, I come to think of Raphaelle and his men. The fights... it's exactly how they behave with each other. I giggle.

"What's funny?" Danielle asks.

"Not sure if I should say," I giggle as the thought lingers. 

"Then whisper it to me," she begs, leaning her ear over to me. And as I whisper it, she bursts out laughing. "Okay, I see it. That's just... ridiculous!"

We stand there for a while, silently pacing towards the Koalas in the next enclosure.

The sight of the adorable creatures nestled among the branches of eucalyptus trees forces a smile to form upon my face. Their fuzzy ears twitch as they munch on leaves, their movements slow and deliberate.

"They're so cute!" I whisper.

"I know, right? I could watch them all day. Actually, I could bring one home."

Alex coughs from behind us. I turn slightly, giving him the will-you-please-shut-up look.

"They're not cute. Have you ever seen them in the rain?" He asks. 

I shake my head, making him grin. "Let's just say these ones look like Raphaelle when he's with you. But make it rain, and well, they look like him whenever he's not. Raphaelle is not cute. Get what I'm saying?"

Danielle rolls her eyes. "Do you just have to ruin everything?"

He shrugs, "kinda my thing."

She snorts. "Why? What do you get out of it? A gold star from Raphaelle?"

I giggle. As if that'd happen. 

"I gotta have some fun too! Okay?"

"Well, your idea of fun is fucked up then. Grow up."  

I try to shake him off, ignoring his entire presence as I turn back around to continue admiring the Koalas. I refuse to let his negativity dampen my spirits.

We wander through the zoo, until I'm grabbed by the hand, making me scream loudly. 

"Woah there, bambina, it's just me," Raphaelle says. 

I put my hand on my chest, breathing out in relief. "Don't do that to me!" 

And I don't know if I'm just overwhelmed but I burst out crying. 

Raphaelle's eyes soften as he pulls me into a comforting embrace, "oh, baby. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you."

I bury my face in his chest, the familiar scent of his cologne, citrus and musk, mixed with the faint smell of cigar smoke washing over me. He doesn't smoke, so this must be from someone else. "It's okay," I whisper, my voice muffled against the fabric of his shirt. "I just... I didn't expect to see you here."

He strokes my hair tenderly, his touch calming, "well, I finished early," he explains softly. "Have you eaten yet?"

I pull back slightly to look up at him, my eyes still glistening with unshed tears. "It has just been a few hours since breakfast. I'm not hungry."

His face hardens. Oh no. He's giving me the daddy look. And not the good kind. "No? Baby, you never notice when you're hungry. Alex however..." he gives him a scolding glare, making him gulp. Danielle throws her head back laughing at his reaction. "He should've known to tell you."

"So you're not angry with me?" I whisper.

He brushes away a stray tear from my cheek, shaking his head. "No, baby."

I smile up at him, and he leans down to kiss my forehead. "Let's get you something to eat."

We make our way towards a nearby food stand, and Raphaelle's protective demeanor softens the edges of my anxiety. I always walk around slightly anxious, but whenever he's around it all fades away. He's the best medication ever. 

He orders for us with a quiet authority, paying with change from his pocket. A mafia thing. They always pay cash. 

Sitting at a nearby table, surrounded by the chatter of other zoo-goers, Raphaelle's gaze remains fixed on me. I fidget under his scrutiny. Now is not the place to have these squishies. Not here, or anywhere in front of Danielle. She'd never let it go. 

"Baby? Are you okay?," he asks, handing me my plate with a sandwich on it. 

I offer him a small smile, "yeah," I reply softly, my voice barely above a whisper. "I'm just... it's hot." There, a camouflage that's not exactly a lie. 

His hand reaches across the table, enveloping mine in a gentle yet firm grasp. "I understand," he says, "good thing I got you water then," he winks. I just know that he knows. And so I giggle.

I nod, "yeah. Thank you." 

Danielle eyes us, trying to decipher what's going on between us, but all I see is confusion.

"We'll never get them, huh?" Alex voices out, making Raphaelle look at him disapprovingly, yet he doesn't say a word. 

Danielle nods at him. "No," she shakes her head as she takes a bite of her sandwich. 

"Just eat. You need energy," Raphaelle tells me, seriousness inked into his eyes. 

We resume our meal in silence, and as we finish, Raphaelle rises from his seat, extending his hand towards me with a silent invitation. I don't hesitate to take it. I place my hand in his, letting him take the lead.

We stroll through the zoo, his pace steady and determined, while my steps falter slightly as I try to keep up with him. Why does he have such long legs? Jeez. Even Danielle struggles to keep up, and she's taller than me with half a head. 

As we walk, I steal glances at him, studying the lines of his face, he's like a puzzle, complex and enigmatic, and I've come to know every piece of him except those he has hidden away from me. I just wish I could complete the puzzle that he is. To see the extraordinary masterpiece- in all its glory, with all its faults and imperfections, and still love it whole-heartedly. But I only get to love an almost completed puzzle whole-heartedly. And it's oh-so-frustrating!

Suddenly, he stops, and I nearly bump into him as I come to a halt beside him. His gaze is fixed on something in the distance, and there's a faint smile formed by his gorgeous lips.

"What is it?" I ask, following his line of sight. 

He gestures towards a nearby enclosure, "they remind me of you," he says softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

I raise an eyebrow in confusion. "Me? What does? I can't see anything!" I jump, trying to see what he is seeing.

He lets out a soft chuckle, and then he lifts me up from under my arms with ease. And suddenly, at the other side of the bush a bunch of Fennec foxes comes into sight. I smile in an instant. "They're cute and little, just like you." I blush.

"Alright, Don Juan, I'm still here, you know?" Danielle whines, annoyed.

Without a word, he reaches out, his hand finding mine once again, intertwining our fingers. The warmth of Raphaelle's hand in mine makes those squishies bloom inside me, a sensation I've grown accustomed to but still never fails to make my heart flutter. His touch, so commanding yet gentle, it's fascinating. 

"Danielle," he pauses, "how can I forget?" 

I can't help but feel a pang of guilt. She's been my friend for years. Yet here she is, feeling pushed aside by the gravitational pull Raphaelle has on me.

"I'm sorry, Danielle," I say softly, my gaze flickering between her and Raphaelle. "I didn't mean to..."

Raphaelle squeezes my hand gently, silencing me, before turning his attention to Danielle. "Don't you dare say sorry for being affectionate with me," he says, his voice smooth as silk. "And Danielle, if you have an issue with PDA, I'm afraid you're miserable. Just let me adore my girlfriend, will you?"

Danielle tilts her head. "Miserable? I was coming here with my best friend, and this... I don't know, babysitter you've chained to her for too fucking long and here you have the audacity to call me miserable? I didn't come with her to be a third-wheel."

Ugh... why can't they just get along? And she has a point. I let go of his hand, inching slightly away from him. I'm torn between them. And it's not a good feeling. 

Raphaelle's gaze softens as he looks between her and me. "You're never on the sidelines, Danielle," he says, his voice carrying a reassuring tone. It's as if he's momentarily daddy'ing her as well.  "You're her best friend. Of course you should get your equal share of her. But don't stop me from being affectionate with her. It's how she feels loved. And I want her to feel my love, not just be aware of it."