I was sitting on my bed, and Kei towered over me. She was staring at me as if she were a teacher preparing to put me in detention.
''Alright, Kiyotaka-Kun we need to set some ground rules first.''
''Yeah, yeah relax, I won't do anything weird to you while you sleep.'' I shrugged my shoulders.
'' You w-won't...?''
Why does she sound so disappointed?
''And the second one is cheating on me. That's a big no-no. This one is a matter of life and death...''Β
''Don't worry I'm not interested in anyone except you,'' I said in my usual monotone voice.
Kei meekly blushed, but in the next second, it disappeared.
"Okay, then who was that harpy that touched your arm a year ago?"Β
''You mean the school nurse? She was just checking my pulse.''
"Oh yeah! What about that orc of a woman you were talking to in the book store?"
''Oh, I was just asking the clerk ifΒ she had any recommendations for novels..."
"Why did you go to the trouble of getting a female clerk?"
"Ugh..."
If I say that she was the only clerk that day, she would probably think I'm making excuses, so I tried not to say anything. But then, she started to push me even harder.
''Why didn't you go to a bookstore with a male clerk? Hey, why not?"
Kei kept bombarding me with questions.
I wanted to say, "How did you know about the time I went to the bookstore by myself?..." but again, I couldn't say anything. After all, if Kei gets angry, anything I say would only fuel the flames...
How does she even remember this stuff from ages ago? She can barely remember the quadratic formula.
"Hey, why aren't you talking? Hey? Do you have something you want to hide from me?"
''Nope!"
''Why are you so desperate in making excuses? What exactly are you hiding? There better not be a naked girl in your closet."
Dammit, what's the right answer? Every option I pick while talking to Kei always backfires.
The female species, such an enigma.
"Don't worry Kiyotaka-Kun, it's my fault for not being there for you to protect you from those lusty women. F*ck Harem!"
''............''
''I'll overwrite my past mistakes with our future as much as I can. ''
"........"
Now that I think about it, the school nurse quit her job the day after we met. And the female clerk was no longer there the next time I went to the bookstore. Weird....
--------------------------------------
And so our new life together began. Or rather our one night together. I decided to sleep on the couch while she uses my bed.
Since she's gonna use my room I started doing basic chores of cleaning it up. You know to make it presentable.
''Kiyotaka-kun, can I help you with anything?"Β
''Nope, I'm fine."
What? Is there something you don't want me to see? Don't tell me you're hiding a chick under your bed?"
"Yeah.....no"
''...Okay, so it won't be a problem if I help, right?"Β
''Do whatever you want." I sighed.
Kei happily started doing the chores with me.
"What? What's this?"
As she said this, Kei took out one of the novels from my bookshelf. It's called "My girlfriend with big tits can't be this cute!''Β
"It's a novel, though, isn't it?" I tilted my head, confused.
"...The title says big tits, but do you like flabby flesh?"
'' Mmm... don't know, never really thought about it.''
"I guess I'll just have to get big tits," Kei said while staring at her chest.
What?
Kei's bust is by no means small, but it's not big either. It's the perfect shape and size. But knowing Kei's jealousy, she's probably pondering something out of the box. Is she thinking of getting one of those breast implants?
"I'll have to shave off the breasts of every woman but me."Β
''Hold up. Wait a minute!''
She went in a direction I never even thought of going. I guess that's one way of achieving big tits! Relatively speaking?
But what a dangerous way to think...
"What? Didn't you want breasts that look like the woman on the cover of this book?"
''Not really..."
"Then why are you buying these books?" She said with an icy stare.
''Well...Ah"
To be honest I never really bought that book. It's not even mine. Back when Yamauchi wasn't expelled, he and Ike would hang out here. On one of those occasions, he left that book behind and I never got an opportunity to return it. It's been on my bookshelf gathering dust till now.
''Would you rather have me or this flimsy paper woman?"Β
I can't really say I'm into paper women, can I?Β
"The first sounds more important......"
''So it won't be a problem if I throw this away, right?" Kei stared at the novel cover with unfathomable disgust.
"...yes."
Well, there goes my only living memory of Yamauchi........Β
Mmm.....She's probably doing me a favor.
But I can't believe Kei is so envious of a 2D girl that she throws the book away...
Β Women truly are unfathomable.
[TO BE CONTINUED]