A/N

My boyfriend and I broke up this week. I'm sorry about the lack of updates; I just want to make sure this story is absolutely perfect before you read it.

Thank you for understanding. I hope you all have a better week than I've had.

As the music from downstairs grew louder, Kid knew his friends were ready for him. He turned to BlackStar, his arm outstretched for the other meister to take. "Well, are you coming? It seems as if they're ready for us."

The blue-haired technician took the reaper's hand, leading him downstairs. "I remember when you used to be too embarrassed to hold my hand in front of people," he remarks, which earns an eye roll from Kid.

"I wasn't embarrassed," the Shinigami retorted, "I thought we were over that."

"Whatever you say, Death God."

As the pair headed downstairs, the music only grew louder. Kid wasn't a fan of loud music, but he knew his friends were, so he usually didn't complain. Plus, it was a party. Wasn't he supposed to loosen up and have some fun? Even though this was a school setting, he was sure someone snuck in alcohol to make things more interesting. Last time, it was Soul. He and BlackStar drank until they couldn't see right and stumbled over their steps. It was like watching a baby learn how to walk. Kid's lips upturned in a smile at the memory. Oh, how BlackStar confessed his undying love for him so many times that night.

"Death God, I really love you. 'Ya know that?"

"Yes, BlackStar."

"Say it like you mean it!"

"Kiddo!" Lord Death greets over the music, waving him over. "I want a full report on how your mission went!"

The couple walked up to elder Shinigami, Kid walking more prideful than usual. Did the two stop holding hands? No. Did Kid notice much? Also, no. He would never admit it, but holding BlackStar's hand put him at ease. It was a way of feeling life at his fingertips, even on the days where he felt dead inside. The assassin always knew how to clear the cobwebs of his mind. The younger reaper glanced over at BlackStar for reassurance before speaking.

"The rumors about the Blood Countess were much more disturbing than we thought," Kid explained, his face tightening to express the gruesome misery and suffering he witnessed. Out of every mission he's taken on, this one would be the one that tormented him. He broke eye contact with his father as his mind recalled the memories. "She would lure impoverished girls and women into her castle with the false hope of job offers. Once they arrived at the castle, they never returned home . . . "

BlackStar lightly squeezed Kid's hand in reassurance as he continued his report.

"She would torture them in gruesome ways, and would even force them to mutilate themselves. The Countess would drink and bathe in their blood before consuming their souls because she claimed it would give her eternal youth. I recovered over 600 souls she's taken, including her own. I know I wasn't supposed to act on her tendencies, but I couldn't stand to watch her do these horrendous things any longer. Evil to that degree must be dealt with directly. I talked to mothers around the area, and some were hiding their daughters in fear of her. Her crimes were no secret, but her royal status and widespread terror kept her unpunished. I believe it was best handled this way."

"So, the souls," Death said, his tone conveying no emotion, "where are they?"

"They're safe," Kid responded, still feeling nauseated from the conversation. "I will return them to you when the party ends."

"Jeez, Kid," BlackStar began, his hand placed at the back of his neck from sheer awkwardness. "I didn't know your mission was that intense. I'm sorry—"

"I didn't mean to give you such a horrendous mission, Kiddo," Death interrupted, the tone of his voice finally showing mercy for the distress his son must have witnessed. "The mission was merely for stealth, and you intentionally went against it—"

"Hey, did you just interrupt me?!"

"—however; since it was an emergency situation, I will excuse it and allow your weapons to have the Kishin soul. Great work, Kiddo." He patted his son's head, Kid batting away his unusually large hand. His pats were more like slaps. "You're going to be a great leader, someday. Now, enjoy the party your friends put together for you. I wouldn't want all of this food to go to waste!" It seemed like Death was completely unphased by BlackStar interrupting him, or the fact that the assassin was throwing a fit because he never had a chance to participate in the conversation. His presence was completely overlooked.

"I'm sure Patty will take care of that," Kid responds, the discussion causing him to lose his appetite. As a grim reaper, you see many ghastly deaths, but the Shinigami knew this would be something that kept him up at night. The bodies, the faces, the blood . . . Oh, all of the blood.

"You're just going to let him interrupt me?!" BlackStar selfishly asked, a question which Death disregarded. It wasn't a secret that Death wasn't a fan of the two's relationship, but Kid couldn't pinpoint why. Death always said something along the lines of "love between you and a mortal would never be forever. Besides, humans change their feelings like the weather, especially that boy. You wouldn't want to ruin the squad you all worked so hard to make", but the young reaper saw more in BlackStar than that, and he knew his father saw more potential, too. He believed it was something more personal than just ruining their so-called potential.

"I'll try my best," the younger shinigami responds before leading BlackStar away. "He didn't mean it," he told the assassin as they walked towards their friends. Maka greeted them with a wave and a smile.

"Finally! Now, the party can begin!"

As the clan began their journies home from the party, Kid and BlackStar stayed close together. To be honest, Kid knew there was unfinished business between the two. There was no way BlackStar dropped everything that night. Even if he somehow did, the reaper still wanted to talk about it. They were still both in a disagreement, and it would only manifest more if the issue went unaddressed. Kid has fallen for this before; when he thought things were over, they weren't. Hell, he was dealing with a warrior god, after all. At the end of the day, there needed to be a compromise somewhere. Maybe BlackStar could finally explain what was going on that night. After everything was said and done, Kid realized all he wanted was to understand.

"Well, Kid, what did you think of our kickass party?" Soul asked, putting his arm around the reaper in a buddy fashion. The scythe reeked of alcohol. "It was pretty cool, wasn't it?"

"I appreciate the effort put into it. Thank you, all of you," Kid gracefully responded, a little hesitant to Soul's drunk touch. "I hope you all had a good time, as well. I can tell some of us did," he said, referring to drunk Soul. He was surprised BlackStar wasn't drunk. Usually, when one got drunk, so did the other.

"What's with the formality?" Liz asked. "We're your friends, not your colleagues." Patty, on the other hand, had a to-go box with her from the party because she refused to leave until all of the food was gone. No fun juice for her.

Formality? Kid didn't think he was talking formally. "I apologize," he stated, but then, an impulsive thought hit him like a bus.

The toilet paper.

Oh, God. Have Liz and Patty been keeping up with the toilet paper? What if one of his portraits were tilted slightly to the right instead of being centered? What if the wax on one of his candles burned slightly more than the other? Oh, he had to go check right this instant! Just the racing thoughts made him physically sick. He wouldn't be able to live with himself until these things were checked. Why on Death's earth did he trust Liz and Patty with such a crucial task? If his mansion was even slightly unbalanced, he would be in ruins. How pathetic is that? A Death God who can't even leave him because his toilet paper is unfolded. Maybe he should just die...

"Death God, you look green."

Mid-conversation, Kid bolted from the group towards the mansion. He couldn't take it anymore. The thoughts were eating him from the inside out. If the toilet paper were left unattended, how could he become a proper Shinigami?! If he can't even keep his house orderly, how was he supposed to keep the world in order? His suitcase rolled behind him as he ran, but the reaper decided the suitcase was slowing him down, so he sacrificed it for speed. How could he have left his precious home for so long?!

"Where the hell are you going?!" he heard behind him, but Kid could care less. If his home were in decays, then so would the rest of the world! How pathetic. He can't even trust his home to be balanced while he was away. This meant he was truly a failure. His father thinks he's a failure, and he'll never be able to take his place. Sweat pooled in his palms as Kid's hands shook in anticipation. Honestly, it was a shock he was able to stay away from home for so long without a freakout. Maybe that exposure therapy with BlackStar did actually help...

Once Kid made it to the door, his convulsive hands had trouble fitting the key in the hole. "Damn," he cursed to himself, trying to steady his hand. Sweat bled from his forehead, drop by drop. One more second away from his home and he would vomit. How could he let himself be away for so long without knowing how his mansion was being cared for? What the hell was he thinking?!

"Death God," he heard from behind him. BlackStar's warm, sunkissed hand then placed itself on Kid's forearm to steady the trembling. "Your house is fine, dude. You need to calm down.—"

"Do not tell me to 'calm down'," Kid snapped, finally turning the key and swinging the door open. He checked the portraits, the candles, the furniture, his room, Liz and Patty's rooms, and yes, everything was just as he left it. Oh, thank Death! There really was nothing to worry about. He was then able to settle on the couch, covering his head with his hands. The reaper hasn't had an episode like that for a long time, at least not that bad of one. His heart pulsed against his chest, his eyes tearing up from the sudden panic. Even though everything was fine, he still felt like he should die. Even when everything is fine, the anxiety never departs.

The Shinigami felt the couch dip next to him, feeling a muscular arm snake its way around his shoulders. "Come here, Death God," he heard and immediately obliged, leaning into the blue-haired technician. There was something about BlackStar's chest that swiftly put him at ease. His breathing began to slow as he collected his thoughts. Even though his body was slowing down, his mind was still clouded with horrible, harming thoughts. He wanted to die. The world would be better off with another Death God, wouldn't it? "Another bad one again, huh?"

Kid sighed, nodding his head. He felt disgusted with himself for leaving the friends who had just prepared a welcome-home party for him. He really was a terrible person, wasn't he? BlackStar used his free hand to run it through the reaper's hair, doing his best to calm his lover down. The technician had to admit, BlackStar has gotten a lot better at this sort of thing. Before, he would just tell him to either get over it or die. Sometimes, he really wanted to. It wasn't until Dr. Stein diagnosed him with severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder that his friends began taking these episodes seriously.

"If I can't even be sure my house is orderly, how am I supposed to maintain the world's order?" he sadly asked the assassin. "I'm a pathetic excuse for a Shinigami. I'm sure Father is ashamed of what he's created. I should just die—"

"Stop talking like that," BlackStar scolded, snapping Kid upright so he was looking directly at him. "You're a god, Death God. You and me both. You can't let little things like these take that away from you. Even if one of the candles were fucked up, that could be fixed, right? So why the hell are you so riled up about nothing?"

"I think I need to start going to counseling again."

"I think you need to get your head out of your ass."

Kid gave the assassin a scolding look, but he knew at the end of the day, he was right. He has become aware of the places his mind wanders to since he began counseling, and he needs to find his way out. His scolding look then turned to a soft smile as he placed his hand on BlackStar's shoulder.

"Thank you, BlackStar. I needed that."

"Yeah, well, us gods stick together. That's why we're together. We can't let petty things like uneven candles get in our way." The assassin stood up, motioning to the door. "Follow me, Death God."

"Follow me, Death God. I wanna show you something."

"Show me what?" Kid asked irritatedly. How dare he get annoyed with me! I'm trying to show him something cool, and he isn't appreciating the time I'm taking out of my day to show him! "I'm supposed to be tutoring you, you know. Remember how Maka refused to tutor you because of your lack of listening? Your grades aren't exactly something to be proud of."

"And you can't even write your own name!" I argue back. "Just shut up and come with me for a sec. It won't take that long."

"Wait, BlackStar," he said with uncertainty, putting his hand up to stop me. We were sitting across from each other at the kitchen table, a single light shining right above us. I don't have a fucking clue what the hell he's trying to teach me. We've been here for hours, but I haven't been able to focus.

"May I ask you something before we go?"

I roll my eyes, sitting back in the chair. "You have a question for a big guy like me? Sure, shoot."

Kid looked off into the distance for a second before facing me again. I didn't know if he was trying to find a way to say what he wanted to say or if he was just stalling so he didn't have to come with me. Before I could call him on his bullshit. Death God started talking.

"When Tsubaki and you were faced with Witch Angela and those Kishin souls, why didn't you take Angela's soul and make Tsubaki a Death Scythe? Why did you return the souls?"

"Oh, you're talking about Al Capone," I answer, needing time to think about it. That was a tough question coming from Death God. We usually don't talk about things like this. He's right; I could've just turned in the souls and taken Witch Angela's soul, but something stopped me. She was just a kid, and it wasn't a fair battle. Sure, I beat Mifune with little-to-no effort, but it wasn't fair to take that out on the kid. It just... wasn't fair. It wasn't right, and I thought someone like Kid would know that. Maybe this is one of those tests he does on people, and he's seeing if a star like me will pass. Well, I have something for him.

"Because she's just a kid, and killing a kid would give me nightmares," I nonchalantly tell him in response. "Would you kill a kid like that?"

"But she's a witch," Kid retorted, "you could've proved everyone wrong right then and there. Why didn't you?"

Your response shocked me. I didn't take you as the type to think about killing kids.

"Would you have done it, Death God?"

Kid leaned back in his chair, taking a second to think. I couldn't blame him— when it happened, I had to think about it, too. It was a challenging choice for a star like me, but at the end of the day, I feel like I made the one a real warrior would take. Kicking someone down who can't defend themselves isn't godly at all. Even if she were a witch, she's just a kid...

"Are you going to say something, Death God?" I ask, cocking my head to the side. I was curious about what he had to say. I knew Kid thought in complete black and white, but I didn't think it was as serious as everyone said it was. "Look, if Sid didn't save me from the Star Clan, I would've either died with 'em all or grew up to become the greatest Kishin known to man. Would you kill a baby who didn't know no better? No one's born evil. I thought you knew that."

"Hm," Kid said in response, nodding to my response, "but what if she betrays the academy like Witch Medusa and Crona? We tried taking in Crona as a friend, yet he still betrayed us. What if Angela were to do the same?"

I scoffed. He really does think this black and white. Yeah, Crona betrayed the school, and I'd kick his ass in a heartbeat, but there's more to it than that. He's really challenging a choice a big guy like me made? I know I made the right choice, and I don't have to prove that to anyone. Even the big man took the kid in, so what's Kid's issue?

"You aren't thinking right, Death God. Crona was a different story," I tell him, noticing how the lighting made his golden eyes look more piercing than they already were. If I weren't such a big man myself, I might be intimidated by him. "He didn't know how to deal with his problems, and his so-called 'mom' made him do things he didn't wanna do. Angela is a good kid, even your dad thinks so."

Kid shook his head, his black hair shining with the light. "No, you aren't understanding," he scolded, crossing his arms. "We took Crona in and protected him from Medusa. My father believed in him, and he still betrayed us—"

"Crona isn't Angela," I interrupt, which earned me a glare.

"Don't you dare interrupt me again—"

"You're thinkin' stupid," I interrupt again. I knew he wanted to hit me, but I also knew Kid wouldn't dare. "Look, if she turns out to be evil or whatever, you can blame it all on me. You can hate me for the rest of eternity if you want, Death God. She can be a runt, sometimes, but she's a good kid. She doesn't deserve the title of a bad guy when she hasn't even been bad yet. What if she helps us later on, huh? What would you think about her, then?"

Death God sighed, running his hand through his hair. There was a silence between us for a while, and Jesus fuck did I hate silence. There should always be some kind of noise to drown out uncomfortable shit like this. Even though the conversation seemed done, I couldn't stop looking at him. His skin was so pale compared to mine; he already looked dead even though he was alive. Was Kid fully alive, or was he half dead? He's a Death God, right? Does that mean everything he touches dies? No, he's touched me before... Maybe his body is dead but his head is still alive, or maybe I'm stronger than death itself! Nothing could kill a star like me! I'm immortal!

"You're right. I guess I didn't take that into account. Just like Kishins, witches aren't born evil, either. She's a child, and that would have been the ethically wrong thing to do. I am amazed your morals come before your ego, BlackStar."

The gleam in your eye. I knew you gained respect for me at that moment, Death God. We don't see eye-to-eye all the time, but when we do, we're unstoppable.

"You just thought about killing a kid!"

That statement made Kid frown in regret. I didn't mean to make him feel bad. If there's one thing I loathe more than silence, it's my friends being sad. I grinned back at him.

"It's okay; I had to think about it at the time, too."

"I know this is a bit off-topic," he says, leaning towards me, "but you said Sid saved you from the infamous Star Clan. Could you tell me more about that, if you're comfortable?"

I put my hands behind my head, leaning back into the chair to relax. "Death God, there's nothing to tell. It isn't like I remember much," I tell him. His pale skin glowed with the light. It was dull tinged with pink. I could see the veins on his wrists, blue and purple. His skin was unscarred, unlike mine. There's no proof of the battles he's fought, even though he's fought so many. How do you live with yourself like that? Living without the proof you've lived? "Let's just say, my family was a bunch of bad people. They were greedy and raided small villages for money. After their raids, they'd kill everyone and take their souls. Sid took me in 'cos I was just a baby. Do you think I'm a bad guy just 'cos my parents were?"

Kid shook his head again. Death God barely moved, sometimes. It was like he was barely alive. His eyes then peered at my star tattoo, pointing to it. "Do you remember getting that?"

A jolt of shock ran through my body, my eyes opening wide for a second. A big guy like me has never felt anything like that before. I remember screaming as my dad held me down to give me the thing, but it wasn't something I liked talking about. It made my heart race like I was reliving the moment. It's hard reliving the moments you couldn't fight against.

"I don't wanna get into that."

Death God nodded, getting up from his seat. "You said you had something to show me, right? Let's go look at it."

You were the first person to respect me not wanting to talk about my tattoo. Dr. Stein and Tsubaki made me tell them the story. Even though they meant well, it didn't end up well in the end. You really respected me a lot back then, didn't you, Death God?