❛Last night I dreamt,
That somebody loved me.
No hope, no harm.
Just another false alarm.❜

 — The Smiths

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Forks was a rainy place, nestled on the Olympic Peninsula and under almost constant cloud-cover. The kind of place where a person could forget what the sun looked like, and where the chill remained in a person's bones no matter what they did. Maybe Roman wouldn't have cared so much if he wasn't perpetually frozen, but he was- and he wasn't happy about the ice that had become of his bones. He could feel his older brother watching him as they drove from the SeaTac airport in Seattle to the small town that housed just over three thousand people. A long drive, yes, but Blake worked in Seattle, and after everything that had happened in Rome, the older Kennington brother didn't think the blonde should live in a big city. So, when he'd decided to take his sixteen-year-old little brother in, he'd gone on the hunt for a house in a small town, before finally settling on Forks. It was the best option for everyone.

Despite the almost constant shivering that had settled into the young boy's body, Roman's head laid against the cool glass of the car window as he stared at the trees passing by. He wasn't happy about leaving Rome, about returning to the country he was born in- actually, it was a situation he'd half hoped he could avoid, because he loved travelling and seeing the world. Forks wasn't where he wanted to spend his last two years of high school, and yet- here he was. Part of him had wanted to stay back in Italy, back in his room with his nightly visitor, the impossibly cold boy with the red eyes. Despite what Alec had done to him, he hadn't wanted to leave.

No matter how anyone would classify their relationship, Roman had felt something for the boy, and wasn't about to roll over and let it all go. Even if Alec hadn't felt the same way in return.

But how to keep their relationship alive without so much as a phone number to reach him, and with both an ocean and a continent spanning the space between them, was something that escaped him. He was at a loss.

The blonde's therapist had told him that it'd be best if he just forgot about Alec, and Blake had told him he wasn't allowed to see the Italian boy, even if he showed up at their house. If there was one thing that Roman always did, it was listen to his older brother when the man put his foot down. He might have put up a fight for one thing or another, and he might not have listened to their parents on the rare occasion that they actually told him anything, but Blake was someone he always listened to, no matter what happened. The older man had raised him until he'd turned eight and Blake had turned twenty-two. That was the year that Blake had left, had stopped traveling with his little brother and his parents in exchange for the business life in Seattle, where he'd become more successful than anyone had really expected him to.

But leaving Roman in the care of their parents had truly ruined the boy, and he wouldn't stop blaming himself for what had become of his little brother. Taking the blonde in after what had happened in Rome was the only way he could think of even beginning to make it up to him. Maybe taking care of him had become a whole lot more trouble than he remembered it, but he'd had to save him. To protect him. He'd gotten the list of questions that the boy's therapist thought Blake should ask him regularly, and he was going to start making a habit of asking them, even if they made him feel slightly awkward.

"Are you hungry?" Blake's voice roused Roman from his slightly hazy thoughts, the blonde turning his head just enough to watch his brother as he spoke. "Did you eat on the plane like Dr. Tamara asked you to?"

Hazel eyes narrowed as they took in the seemingly innocent face of his older brother, his hands spreading over his thighs as he tried to think of how to answer. "Yeah," he said finally, the lie spilling from his lips with no tell-tale give aways. He'd spent the past almost four years of his life learning exactly how to lie, and he wasn't about to slip up now. "But- I know she told me to get whatever beef dish they were serving, but they were serving meatloaf and Tilapia, and you know how I feel about meatloaf. So, I got the fish." He recited just enough information to satiate his older brother's curiosity, but knew the facts so he wouldn't get flustered. He'd practiced it enough to know the drill.

Blake, more than satisfied with the answer, just nodded his head and grinned a little. "There aren't many groceries in the house, but I remembered how much you loved to cook, so I figured we could stop at the grocery store and do some shopping. Get some food for tomorrow, breakfast before you go to school and all of that. Maybe lunch? I know how you are about that stuff- you could make yourself lunch, and bring it with you. I talked to the nurse, she's got a microwave in her office if you'd like to go heat it up. Whatever you want, Roman." That was one thing that Roman hated about Blake- maybe he loved his older brother more than anything in the world, but Blake tended to hover. He was always trying to make him feel better, and that wasn't something that he appreciated. Over the last eight years he'd spent living without Blake to take care of him, Roman had grown accustomed to taking care of himself, of raising himself with absentee parents, and he didn't want someone telling him what to do, of hovering over him. Maybe he loved his brother, but he hated the fact that Blake still saw him as the eight-year-old who would force him to stay up late on Christmas Eve, so they could bake fresh cookies to leave out for Santa.

He hadn't believed in Santa since the year his older brother had left. And he wasn't that boy anymore. 

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Roman had to admit that the house Blake had picked out was nice. It was large, spacious enough to give both of the brothers their own space, while still allowing them to be close, feeling like a family without suffocating themselves with each other's presence. It had a large, closed in porch that was complete with heating, and that was probably Roman's favorite part- he loved watching the snow fall, but he was too sick, his body incapable of maintaining its core temperature, to allow himself to sit in an open porch. So, the heating was the best possible compromise he could think of.

"I hope you like it," he heard his brother's deep voice over his shoulder, making his head turn as he processed the fact that Blake had actually picked out the house because it was what he thought Roman would like- and he had to admit that he did. Sure, maybe there were styles he'd prefer, but the core of the house was beautiful, and he was anxious to start decorating for the holidays. He might have missed the opportunity for Thanksgiving decorations, but nothing was stopping him from going all out for Christmas.

"I love it, Bubba," the blond said quietly, the old nickname he'd had for the older male slipping from his lips without a second thought. It'd been almost a decade since he'd had the chance to utter it, but it still flowed just as naturally as it had when he'd been a toddler, unable to say 'brother.' "Really. Thank you." He would have hugged his brother if it wasn't for the suitcases in the older man's hands, and the light bags of groceries in his own. The heavier stuff was still in his brother's car- his body was too weak to handle the heavy things, so he could only manage carrying in the bread and some of the vegetables on his own. In all honesty, he felt useless- but he knew that his body's weakness was the consequences of his own actions, and he really couldn't take any of it back now unless he was prepared to make major life changes. And those weren't changes he was prepared to make.

The blond walked through the house cautiously, looking around even if the scenery didn't completely sink in with each new room he uncovered. His mind was doing more preparing for what the house would look like once it was decorated for the holidays than he was actually looking at the layout. He placed his grocery bags into the kitchen once he'd found it, carefully putting the items away before he turned his head to look at the large kitchen. It felt kind of weird, but he had to accept that this was his new home.

Vaguely, he registered Blake walking into the kitchen, but he didn't really process it until he felt his older brother's hand on his shoulder, the light and sudden touch sending a pang of fear through him until it settled into his mind that he was safe. He was fine- this was completely normal, and he had nothing to fear. This was his brother. But that didn't stop his heart rate from picking up for that moment, or for the lingering aches to settle through him once he'd realized what, - and who, - it was.

Roman had to be cautious about his natural nervousness, and his heart- it wouldn't stand anything like what he'd put it through in the past, and this new home was going to be a new start for him to move on from that past. If he could manage.

"-Upstairs, the door at the very end of the hall."

A look of confusion spread over the blonde's face as he looked up at his older brother, before he processed what was happening- Blake was telling him where his room was. "Oh- okay, thank you."

"I took tomorrow off of work. So, I can drive you to school and then pick you up afterwards. I'll bring you to the hospital afterwards, like we agreed," his older brother's voice soothed him in a way that he had almost forgotten about in the past eight years, but that still didn't stop the pang of fear running through him at the reminder that he would be spending his afternoons at the hospitals from that moment on. "Dr. Cullen has plenty of kids- I'm sure we can come up with some sort of agreement so they can take you to the hospital, right? He seems very willing to speak with you, and to try and help. He doesn't mind you hanging around either- he even thinks he might be able to come up with a few things for you to do, so you're not just sitting in an office or at a nursing station somewhere, waiting for me to come pick you up and doing your homework. I promise-" Blake seemed to pause, his breath catching in his throat as he looked down at the little brother he'd abandoned to follow his own path in life. Maybe Blake wasn't always the most affectionate person in the world, but he knew that Roman was, so he did the only thing he could think of, leaning down and pressing a small kiss to the boy's forehead. "I promise things will be better for you here. No matter what I have to do."

The blond's breath caught in his throat at his brother's admission, and he waited with baited breath before nodding his head a little, his arms sliding around the man's middle and hugging him close. "Okay," he whispered. "I trust you, Bubba. I'm- I'm tired. I think I'm going to go to bed now, okay?" He pulled back slightly, sending a small smile up at the other male before he disappeared down the hallway, in search of the stairs that would lead up to his bedroom. It only took him a few seconds to find it, his feet padding up the stairs until he was able to close the bedroom door behind him.

His room wasn't anything special- a light grey color covered the walls, because Roman had told the other male that it was his favorite color, and other than that and a few twinkle lights dotting the room, it was pretty sparse. He had a closet for his clothes, a chest of drawers and a mirror beside it for his small collection of makeup and things like underwear and pants. Whatever he couldn't hang up, really. There was a desk and a computer, and his bookshelf and bed- but otherwise, the room was empty. He walked over to the pile of boxes sitting by his desk, picking up the note on top. A sentiment too sappy for his older brother to say out loud, telling him that he'd left his books and cultural trinkets Roman had collected in his travels in the boxes, so he could organize his room the way he wanted. Part of him knew that it was just everything his therapist had told Blake, knowing how particular he was about having his things just so, but it still made Roman happy, knowing he could set his room up the way he wanted it.

It took the blond a moment to locate one of his boxes of books, and he pulled out one of the books he'd been in the process of reading before his move. He glanced down at the title, a sad look spreading over his face- this had been a book that Alec had given him. But he pushed the feeling away anyway, carrying it over to his bed and laying down, preparing himself for a long night of no sleep.

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[ EDITED ]

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As a vague sidenote, I don't know if anyone would be interested, but if you ever have any questions for any of the characters, feel free to comment on these little notes with it! Maybe like, "Question To (insert character name here): Insert question here?" And then either at the end of each book, or every five/ten/whatever chapters (depending on how many I get) I could post a chapter like a sort of interview/con panel setup of them answering the questions! (Yes, I will even answer questions as the Twilight characters themselves.) Anyways, it's just an idea!