For 

November 30, 2020

A nation under siege! Goikian forces mercilessly batter the beautiful and elegant island of Pericolo. Unable to defend themselves any longer, the people of Pericolo island call on the Inanimate Insanity Federation for assistance. Hoping to save lives and prevent further destruction, Colonel Test Tube and Captain Knife plan a daring ambush which could turn the tide in the fight for this crucial island.

---

"Captain Knife, how are you doing over there?" I asked, looking at the tower opposite to our direction.

"We're set. I've got some guys here that are anxious to get going." Captain Knife answered, transferred from navy to ground units after his events with the claimed "wannabe" Captain Pin of the disgusting Goikian Navy.

"Glad to hear it." I commented.

"We're back, Colonel." Suitcase informed.

"Good. The show is about to begin." I announced, watching from the balcony of the twin towers.

"How's that cannon coming, troops?" Suitcase asked, objsertinvg the ambush guns we installed in place.

"We'll have this one back in business in no time, ma'am," 

"Alright," I noticed." The troops are advancing."

"I'm seeing a full battalion coming right on schedule," Fan informed.

"Tanks! They brought tanks."

The enemy convoy slowly advanced towards the gap, or bottleneck, that the twin towers Knife and I were commanding in. With much machine gun fire, and of course, the high ground, there was no way that we'd lose.

"A little closer..."

Of course the troops were unaware, marching blindly in the pathway. But in the eyes of Fan, you could tell something didn't look right to him.

"Wait! They're splitting up."

"What?"

This couldn't be right. We'd knew that the convoy main would be coming right between these two towers; surely they hadn't seen us through the glass... right?

"Something's gone wrong. I informed. "Prepare all troops for-"

"Go! Go!" Suitcase shouted, sprinting away from the doors.

"Abort the mission!" I yelled, grabbing my AK-47 and leading my group to the exit. Unfortunately, Soap noticed that even more enemies were pouring ou of the left entrence, too.

"Our position's been compromised!"

"Colonel, what's going on?" Knife questioned through comms.

"We're cut off!" I blurted. "The enemy's on to us!"

---

"Squadron, come in." I ordered. "Hind, we need an evac in the south tower."

"Roger that, sir. We're coming."

"South tower? We're in the north." Baseball questioned.

"Not for long," I interjected, slicing a window open. "Balloon, fire the cables."

My team  and I broke through the second tower, shooting the other troops behind their backs, 

"This way is clear!" I shouted over the gunfire.

"How did you get over here?!" Test Tube asked.

"I improvised!"

While Test Tube and I held of the enemy with a few of the machine guns, the rest of the troops fanned out and evacuated to the roof o the tower with the elevators. Bu t unfortunately, the helicopter wasn't there to meet us.

"Now what?"

The enemy had continued to attack us, breaching through the elevators, but fortunately, we managed to sabotage one of the three with some C4 we had. Another wave came in with troops, and Lightbulb took the opportunity to yank off one of the enemy's head, particularly a red robot.

With the relief of escaping through the helicopters we looked to see her carrying the robot head she just took.

"Maybe this tactical droid will tell us how they knew our plan."

---

"The II Federation Army is in the north and south towers, level 46," The robot beeped.

"It just doesn't make sense." Baseball said, when all of a sudden, the head gave off a sparkly bolt, smoking and short circuiting it, and losing all information suddenly.

"Blast!" he blurted. "Think you can get it back online, Watty?"

"Well, I can try," Lightbulb replied, bolting up the robot, but all it did was make a firecracker explosion.

"Well, at least we're not the only ones having a bad day," Knife pouted, entering the room with Colonel Test Tube.

"Knife, Test Tube, they had all our intel," I answered.

"That would explain the ambush," Test Tube concluded. "How could we have left ourselves so vulnerable to a security breach?"

"I don't think we did," Knife claimed.

"You think someone... infiltrated our defenses?"

"Possibly," Knife thought. "It would have to be someone cunning and resourceful enough to gain access to all our plans."

"But that still wouldn't explain how they got our intel," Test Tube reasoned.

"No, you're right. They wouldn't act alone," Knife analyzed. "They'd have someone working with them."

"A spy, sir?" I questioned. "But.. who would want to betray our troops to the enemy?"

"Excellent question, Commander," Knife replied. "Perhaps it's time we made a visit behind enemy lines. I think we'll find our answers there."

"We'll get right on it," I complied.

"No, Suitcase. I need you and Baseball here to find the security breach."

"You can count on us, sir."

"One more thing. This mission is extremely confidential," Knife told.  "The spy could be anyone. Let no one know of our mission."

"Understood, sir," Baseball replied.

As soon as the two left, however, a strange, slow-paced beeping noise was starting to emerge from our ears. As I started to trace the source of it to try and make it stop, I picked up the object that was making it.

One of our communicators. That was activated. 

"Someone left his commlink on," I looked. "Someone... has been listening to everything we said."

When we realized that the mole had found out about our mission, Baseball started to panic. And all the while, someone in red... or pink... had been peeking across the hall.

And it began to run.

"Hey! Stop!" Baseball yelled, sprinting towards the person, as I followed suite.

"Who's that?"

"I have no idea. I'll follow him. You take the west corridor, I'll take the right." I said.

"I'm on it," BB replied.

BB split up going left, and I went to the right side. I quickly saw a shadow at the other end, but all that came out was himself. 

"He must have gone in the mess hall," Baseball deduced.

"We've got a big problem," I gulped.

"Huh. Yeah," Baseball whispered.

"The only people in here are comrades."

---

"One of us? Great! But which one?" I grunted.

"We'll have to wait for his next move," Suitcase answered. "Keep this to ourselves."

"Better contact Test Tube and Knife," I told.

"I'm on it."

---

"Don't shoot. Just keep their communications jammed," Pencil ordered, noticing two speeder bikes zooming on the bare, yet smoking, highway. 

"Roger, roger."

---

"We can't reach them," I said. "Whoever it is has blocked our communications. We're gonna have to find this guy ourselves."

"Hmm. Hey, Lightbulb, could you open the databases for us?" Baseball requested.

"Sure thing," Lightbulb answered.

"Wh-what are you doing?" I asked.

"The guy got his messages out there somehow," Baseball conveyed.  "Just got to find them."

"What do you think?" I asked. "He... or she... just sat down and wrote a note?"

"You have to start somewhere."

---

"We appear to have picked up some friends," Test Tube noticed.

"Indeed," Knife replied.  "In fact, I believe the number of eyes watching us has been steadily growing."

"Great." I sighed. "Perhaps this means our adversary has learned about our mission."

"Perhaps it does."

"Of course," I replied. "Nobody's tried to stop us yet."

"Also true."

"They want us to get to the enemy headquarters," I deduced. "Which means this is a trap."

"I imagine it is," Knife anticipated.

"Well, that's unfortunate..."

"for them."

---

"I've got something," I saw.

"What is it? Is it the traitor?" Suitcase asked.

"I'm not sure. Maybe," I answered.

"Well, what are you looking for?" Baseball questioned.

"Wavelength interference, weak frequencies, spotty, irregular. See how it shows up every few days, then disappears?" I explained. "Day to day, you wouldn't notice it."

"What?"

"It's the pattern," I indicated. "The band's only coming off one terminal in the whole base. Check it out."

"Hmm... Lieutenant Commander Balloon's barracks," Suitcase looked at.  "Only Balloon's men would have access to that terminal."

"Yeah. Balloon's not gonna like that," Baseball noticed. 

"No, he's not," Suitcase repeated. "But if one of his men is giving away our intel, we have to find him and sort this out."

---

"No guards. No barricades. No guns. Huh." I'd said surprisingly, opening the front door. "You'd think the Goikian headquarters would be better protected."

"But  clearly, keeping us out is not what they intend."

---

"No. No way. My guys are the best," Balloon intervened. "No way they're capable of something like this."

"Something like what?" Candy interrupted, entering with a group of other objects.

"...You called them here?"

"Of course we did." Baseball sternly announced. "We're getting to the bottom of this. Now."

"Look, l-let me have a few minutes with them first." Balloon requested. "It's gonna hit them hard." They trust each other, and if one of our own betrayed us..."

"I don't think that's necessary," Suitcase intervened. "Your troops are tough, right?"

"Take a seat, everyone." I ordered.

"We have an imposter among us... and we think it's one of you."

---

"So this is the belly of the beast," Test Tube looked, when all of a sudden, a figure emerged from the dark corner of the shadows.

"... Captain Pin."

"And here I thought this mission would be unpleasant."

"The pleasure's all mine, Captain Knife," the red figure replied.  "I've missed you. My loyal informant let me know you were coming," Pin smiled, drawing her sword out .

"Well, then we thank you for your hospitality," I glared.

---

"I... I don't know." Soap stuttered. "I was doing the things I always do after a mission."

"Things like what?"

"I'm sorry, sir. I'm just a little nervous." she sweated. "You're my Commanding Officer."

"Well, the way I figure it, you tell the truth, you got nothing to be nervous about," Baseball reasoned.

"Soap is telling the truth," Fan commented. "She cleans her weapon after every mission. First thing, every time. She's kind of obsessed that way."

"Is that right?" I asked. "You were cleaning your weapon?"

"Yes, sir." Soap confirmed.

"Go on the computer... while you were in here?" I asked.

"No, sir. I didn't even power it up. Those keys are disgusting." Soap repeated. "You can check."

"Show me your weapon." I requested.

"Yep. Freshly scrubbed."

"The rag's over there in the corner." Soap pointed.

"Good for you, just like your cleany attitude as always," I said. "Now, Button. You were cleaning your weapon, too?"

"No, I was hungry," Corporal Button answered. "I went back to the mess."

"Right away?" Baseball asked.

"Oh, yeah."

"Anyone with you?" he said.

"Cup, sir," He replied. "We got to the mess at the same time, got our grub, and sat together."

"Anyone else in the mess able to confirm what you two are saying?" Baseball questioned.

"Lots of guys there. Ask any of them."

"Oh, we will."

"Captain," Balloon interrupted. "Give me just a moment with them."

"No, it's okay, sir. I've got nothing to hide." Boxing Glove intervened, revealing his arm. "I was in the infirmary. Got banged up pretty good by one of those stink bugs."

"Medic was fixing me up. Doc's got all the records there, if you wanna check."

Yup, there was no doubt he was telling the truth. I saw some good dried scars outside of the edges of the casts; no fake shit. I then turned towards one of our most suspicious individuals in Balloon's division, Stop Sign.

"So, Stop Sign, old boy. What's your alibi?" Baseball asked.

"I was in the mess hall."

"No, you weren't!" Balloon interrupted. "You..."

"I mean, you..."

"If you know something, kid, you should speak up," Baseball told.

"...Stop Sign came in a lot later, after everyone else.

"Well, where were you before you went to the mess, Stop Sign?" Baseball asked.

"Nowhere," he grumbled. "Walking around."

"Son, you know we'll need a better answer than that," Suitcase said.

"I was hiding at the south exit." Stop Sign sighed, taking out a chain of his pocket. "I didn't want anyone to see me string these together."

"Enemy gun bullets..." Baseball looked.

"I just wanted something back." Stop Sign reasoned. "I guess I felt like they owed me."

"I always knew there was something deficient about you." USB said.

"This isn't good, sus guy," Balloon growled.  "Lying about where you were, taking forbidden items from a battlefield..."

"I know."

"I put up with the attitude 'cause you have skill." Balloon intervened.  "But if you could break these rules, your whole character's in question here."

"Wait, no." Stop Sign resented. "Hang on. I'm no spy!"

"Stop Sign, we're all comrades. But how can we trust anything you say now?" Balloon asked.

"No, sir, I'm telling you, I did not..."

"It's okay. We'll get you a proper investigation." Balloon sternly gruffed. "You don't have to say anything till test Tube and Knife come back and talk to you."

"Maybe you should talk, sir. Tell them where you went. I was at the south exit, remember? I saw you go in, sir. I saw you," Stop Sign growled.

"Private, I have been patient..."

"Everyone else turned right, toward the barracks and the mess. You turned left, toward the command center." Stop Sign claimed. "Where were you going, sir?"

"Obviously, the kid feels cornered," Balloon assured.

"W-wait a minute! Balloon! What did you mean, 'till Test Tube and Knife come back'?" Suitcase asked. "How did you know that Test Tube and Knife were gone? Or not?"

"... I really wish you hadn't noticed that, ma'am."

"It's Balloon?"

"BALLOON'S THE TRAITOR?!?!?!"

---

"I've got someone by the helicopters," Baseball noticed, tracking his combat helmet on his smart pad.

"That's our Balloon," I replied. "Now that he's exposed, he has to get out of this base."

"There's no escape now, you piece of rubber!" Baseball shouted.

But just as we were about to step behind one of the choppers, all we saw was Balloon's flashing helmet.

Wait... a flashing helmet?

"Move. Move!"

"Oh man... He took out our weapons depot." I groaned.

"He knew where we'd look," Baseball concluded.  "He's not trying to escape."

"He knows all our moves before we even make them."

---

"Give up, Pin! There's nowhere to run," I demanded, after cornering her in the library archives of the HQ.

"I'm all yours, Captain Knife."

Test Tube smirked, us two knowing we had it in the bag. But Pin somehow managed to collapse the deck under us, calusing us to sink three floors down from the red figure's location.

"You've served your purpose."

"We have to get back! Now!" Test Tube urged.

"It's already too late," Pin smugged.  "So hard to know whom to trust these days, isn't it?"

"What's the plan, Knife?"

"Bringing us here was a mistake, my sweet," I replied. "You've overestimated your abilities."

"Really?"

Pin smashed through the glass of the top floor, semmingly thinking that she could escape. But of course we knew she didn't have a parachute; no bag behind her. Instead, we saw that she jumped onto another minor tower of the enemy HQ... where we found...

A massive army.

"Come and get me, fools!"

"... You didn't tell us you were bringing friends."

"Poor Knife! You've been betrayed!" Pin exclaimed.  "And now we're about to take control of this island."

---

"How do we get this guy?" I hit myself, looking at the flaming ruins of the base. 

"Sir! Balloon ran into the command center," the Cherries reported.

"You guys stay here. Seal the perimeter," Suitcase ordered.

---

Test Tube and I shared a glance with Pin, with Test Tube blasting her telescope RPG at Pin; but the red murderer deflected the blast with her sword, causing the lazar to split in four, before charging the lazar back at her. I jumped down, slashing the tower, causing it to collapse. Realizing that we needed to get out of this situation, I looked to hijack a squadron of helicopters.

"Test Tube! Let's go!"

Test Tube and I smashed the glass of one of the choppers, throwing out a pink robotic flower and a green, fuzzy ball out of the cockpit. Soon enough, were out of sight, out of enemy range.

---

"Prepare to march on the city..." Pin growled. "Have the troops delay the two as long as possible. I will need time to execute the next part of the three pronged - invasion plan."

"Very well, Captain." Coiny replied.

---

"Pretend you're Balloon. What's in your head?"

"Oh, okay , well... My cover's blown, it's time to go, but I decide not to use a ship because it's too obvious," Baseball thought.

"...The lockdown," I said out loud. "He wants to get around the lockdown."

"He's blinded us by taking out the power. He could disable the entire security system!"

"Yeah, but he knows we'd expect him to do that," I discussed, leaving my gun on the table.

"Or does he?" Baseball smirked, formulating up a plan without saying it.. "Yeah, I see what you're getting at."

"Go to the south exit."

"Well, What are you gonna do?"

"I'll stay here, get the power back up." I replied. "That'll help."

"Got it."

---

I couldn't help myself in the vent and just think how FOOLISH those two were! First of all, the two abttle butedies steperating from each other, then Suitcase leaving her gun on the table, and she was turned her back towards the screen vent!

I creeped towards the brown briefcase with the gun in hand, ready to pull the trigger on her. But when I clicked it...

It's... empty.

"Hey, there, darlin'~"

"Gun's empty."

"You know what's funny, traitor?" Baseball questioned, pointing his full gun at me. "We knew you'd never take a chance on the exits while they were blocked."

"I'd stay here to open them myself first," I gritted. "Just like you."

"Don't do a job till you've guaranteed the best odds, right?"

"You knew I was here." I growled.

"Of course we knew. You think we wouldn't have a plan?"

"I'm not the traitor."

"YOU ARE!"

---

Balloon began to chuck his entire body at Baseball, flinging the gun out of BB's hand; while I trie to apprehend him with mine. Unfortunately, the situation got out of hand when the fight turned into a bloody CQB dilemma. I had the upper hand, but Balloon continually blocked my kicks with his hands. Oh, if only I had hands.

"All of you just blindly following orders! For what?!" Balloon screamed. "At least I got something out of all this suffering!"

"Yeah, I bet you sold out your brothers for some real shiny coin, huh?" Baseball scoffed, biting one of Balloon's legs off.

"Yes, she offered me money, but she offered me something more important, something you wouldn't understand!"

"FREEDOM!"

I kicked him right in the guts when Balloon started to... mutate?

"MY NAME... IS... BALLOONY... AND I AM A MEMBER OF THE DEATH SQUAD!!!"

"Aim for the leggs!"

---

"I think freedom's gonna have to wait, kid."

"Balloon? It was you?" Knife sarcastically gasped, not surprised at all.

"It's BALLOONY, for your consideration!"

"So not only have you've been a moronic, cruel, and idiotic contestant that annoyed us for the past few years, you've also been a double agent spy to the enemy, had a different name, AND YOU'VE HAD A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TRUE FORM?!?!"

"He gave us a bit of a chase, sir," Baseball answered replied.

"You couldn't be a greater disappointment," Test Tube glared. "How could you do this to your only friends of whom you reconciled?"

"Only you cruelties would ask that," Balloon replied. "It's the guys like you in high command who keep my friends enslaved. We do your bidding. We serve at your whim. I just wanted something more."

"And all you had to do to get it was put the rest of us all at risk."

"I... I love my comrades," Balloon reasoned. "You're too blind to see it, but I was striking a blow for all of the Federation."

"If you truly loved us, you wouldn't have put us at risk," Suitcase welled up. "I'm... I'm heartbroken by these deceptions you made."

"You betrayed every one of us."

"Take him to lock-up," Suitcase ordered.  "And interrogate him to see if he knows anything else. I want to see... everything."

"Were you able to salvage anything from the weapons depot?" Knife asked.

"Balloon pretty much scorched the whole thing," Baseball answered. "That seemed to be what he was going for all along."

"We managed to save the heavy cannons, though," Suitcase added.

"That's good," Knife replied. "Cause there are about a thousand hostiles on their way here."

"The fight goes on, gentlemen."