last chapter...

'I fell, all because of some stupid asshole who didn't watch where he was going...' 
'I'll let you off the hook this time Changbin, just because it's the first day of this school year, and because this day is special! We have a new student! Lee Felix! There is only one seat left, next to Felix, so sit down!'
Oh no. I recognised that voice immediately, even though I just heard him for the first time this morning. Please... Don't recognise me! 
'Him?' I heard Yoongi yell. 'Seriously, him?! That f*cker was the one that ran over me!'
'Language Changbin! And he couldn't have seen you, he's blind!'

let's continue...

Changbin POV

Hah! Does the teacher really think I would give a f*ck. I couldn't care less if  he's blind or not. His problem, not mine. But yeah, if I said that to the teacher, I would end up at detention once again, I know that much. It wouldn't surprise me, really. I'm used to detention, I'm kinda starting to like that place. It's quiet. And it's after school. Detention gives me a reason to not go home.  That's why I'm actually considering on saying it. F*ck it, I'm saying it, I really don't want to go home this afternoon...

'Miss, do you really think I would give f*ck if someone's blind or not? You know me right? I won't. I honestly don't care. It's not me, so it's alright. He could've watched out better, even if he's blind. That doesn't give him the privilege to walk people over and put the blame on them.'

'Being a total asshole and douchebag doesn't give you the privilege to do that either! Learn some respect! You just  lost mine. I honestly thought you would maybe be kinda nice, at least deep inside, but this just destroyed every nice thought I had left for you. You dissappointed me Changbin, even though you probably won't kow who I am and you obviously won't care. 

That came  from the sunshine in this class, called Han Jisung. He's literally the sun himself, Always happy, always smiling. I was kind of taken aback from his sudden outlash, but that didn't last long. 

He's actually one of the few people I admire. He's the most popular guy in our class, heck, even in the whole school, but it isn't getting to his head at all. He's as humble as he's Always been. 

I've known him since we were laying in our white little matching cradles, our mothers where best friends you see. We were even friends at one point, but that stopped when I started to change.

If he could have controlled the way how it all went, we would still be friends. He didn't give up on me when I started to become grumpier, more distanced and basically threw our whole twelve year friendship in the trash. He still Always said hi, showed up at my porch, walked with me to school, even though I didn't say anything back.

Do I regret the way I acted? Hmm, I don't think so. He would've  eventually also left me, like everyone Always does. So what does it matter that I ended it early? 

He still often approaches me, but I just give him a deadly glare, before walking off, not saying a word. 

He should be happy that he isn't involved with me anymore. I only cause problems. No wonder everyone leaves me. I deserve it. 

Jisung is right. I am an asshole, a douchbag. But do I give a damn? Of course not. There's nothing and nobody to give a damn about anyways. The only person who deserves my respect isn't here anymore. 

Why did you have to leave? Why? Why did you leave me in this hellhole called earth, cause that's what the earth is, well, what it is for me. 

Why did you leave?

Why.

Why?

Why?! 

WHY?!

Why, mom?

It's not like you wanted to leave,  but why?

Why didn't you take me with you?

Or why didn't my dad send me to the same place you are?

'Life' would've been a lot better that way. It would've have been a lot easier to endure, cause I wouldn't have to endure anything anymore. 

But life doesn't Always go your way, so I'm still here, still living, still breathing, annoying the living shit out of everyone. 

And now I even annoyed the one person I thought wasn't able to be annoyed. I don't blame him. If I were in his shoes, I would've left me ages ago. 

I didn't think he was going to snap at me like that, but I guess every person has their breaking point. 

Jisung's words still lingered through my mind when I decided to speak up again.

'You're right. I indeed don't care who you are. For a matter of fact, I don't care who anybody in this classroom is. Hell, I don't even care who anybody in this world is! Everybody Always lives for themselves, so why can't I do the same?! Why huh?! You tell me! Everybody's a selfish bitch when it comes down to it and y'all know it! Cause y'all are the same! We're all the same when it comes down to our big fucking ego! It's all  you, you, you! The rest could drown in the sea for all you care! In the end, everyone is a selfish dick! I'm the same, I won't deny it.'

I sighed when I ended my sudden, random outburst. Where did that even came from?

Some people looked at me shocked. Some looked at me in anger, like I just said the biggest bullshit they've ever heard. Some looked at me dissappointed, as if they weren't already. 

There was only one person who looked in my direction with understanding eyes, eyes drowned in sympathy, as if he understood and agreed with every word that just left my mouth. 

It was the blind boy, the new kid, in my eyes better known as my next victim. 

I wonder why he looked at me like that. He should've know better, cause he fueled the fire in my body even more. 

But before I could open my mouth again, miss Yoon beat me to it. 

'Changbin! To the office. Now!' She yelled at me, her face red in anger and dissappointment.

I stood up from my seat and left the classroom, heading in the direction of the office.

Word count: 1059.

As you can tell, I'm back again! Hello! I hope you liked this chapter! I have a lot more that's already written left, so that will probably come up soon. 

Our vacation in France was kinda nice I guess. We mostly just lazed around most of the time. But wow! The surroundings where amazing! We were in mountain areas, so we could see really far! I often just sat on the ground, staring at the distance, writing new things for you guys.

Ugh, I should really stop rambling about my life, cause y'all probably won't care. 

I know I don't have a lot of readers (hopefully yet, not forever... heheh), but I want to know more about y'all! So let's try something okay? At the end of every chapter, I ask a simple question, or not so simple, it depends in what mood I am. I answer first, and you answer too! If you don't want to participate, that's fine, but I just thought it would be nice maybe, I'd like to get to know new people! 

So let's start of easy! 

What's your favourite colour?

Mine is black or really dark red/green.

Till next time