You can read the author note if you want to. Its kind of important for me.
Btw another BTS's mv for you. The tittle is 'For You' okay, before you see it I just want to say that is the cutest MV I have ever seen. The song is awesome too.
Enjoy this chapter btw~~~

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Kim Taehyung p.o.v

Happiness. I looked around me to see the happiness have consumed our home. All of us are having fun with each other just like the past, when they first meet me. This is what I want. All of us together.

But why do something keep stopping me from fully feel this happiness? Something keep bothering me. This one feeling that stop my positivity to come out.

Guilty. Is that even the right word to describe my feeling? This feeling is the most complicated to explain. If you are wondering what is happening around me, well, after I arrived they said that they want to spend the whole day with me. We choose to watch a movies.

Its dinner time now, Jin hyung already at the kitchen to prepare our dinner with Kookie. The rest of us still at the living room doing our own things.

"Yah, Tae, we need to talk" someone suddenly said slowly. I look up to saw the second member who know the illness in me. Yes, suga hyung.

"Oh, okay hyung." I reply and waiting for him to sit beside me. Weirdly, he don't move from where he's standing.

"Not here. Its about your..." He said really slow almost like a whisper. I already know what he's going to say, immediately stop him.

"Okay, hyung in my room?" I asked. He nodded and follow me to my room. Luckily other members don't noticed because they are busy playing Bingo.

When we arrived I go to sit on my bed and give signal for him to sit beside me. Now, the real discussion start.

"What do you want to said hyung?" I said hesitantly. I already know he want to talk about my cancer. What will he said?

"About your cancer. When are you going to tell the other members?" He straightforwardly said while looking into my eyes. Okay, I don't expect that question at all.

"Erm, I don't know hyung." I spoke looking down. I really don't know when. I'm such a mess.

" You should tell them,Tae-ah. They deserve to know. We will never leave you this time. We can help you Tae." He said while putting his hand on my shoulder. My mind moving really fast to digest the words he said.

At some point its true. I will have my treatment this week. Thay will help me right? Should I tell them? I should.

"I will hyung. I will tell them. You are right. They deserve to know. You will help me right?" I said finally looking at him.

"Of course Tae. Not just me all of the members will be there." He said. We are talking until someone knocked the door.

"What are you guys doing? Having fun without me?" kookie came and smirk. What was on this kid mind?

"I'm asking Tae when will he tell the other member about.. You know." Suga ignoring the teasing tone that kookie use just now. Kookie's face immediately serious. Maybe he remember about my reality that I can't run from.

"You should tell them hyung." He said slowly while looking at the floor. I can felt his sadness eventhough he is standing far from me.

"I will. Why are you coming here Kookie? You should be at the kitchen right?" I'm trying to change the topic. I'm curious too by the way. What is he doing here? He should help Jin hyung in the kitchen.

"Oh, You remind me. Dinner is prepared. I'm here to call you both for the dinner." He said in realization. He is so forgetful. Its make me chuckle though.

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[Time skip] (I skip the dinner because nothing special happened)

After the dinner, I excused myself to take a walk. I need to clear my mind on something. Of course the member let me go after making me promise to never leave them again. They are so cute. I would never leave them though because why would I? I don't have much more time.

I' m walking with my bucket hat and mask as a disguise. You remember the park that I go went I felt the need to cry? There is where I'm going. Its not for crying this time. Just for my own time thinking about all of this.

Honestly, I'm afraid to tell about all of my history and illness to my members. The memories about how Jungkook react to it still fresh in my mind. The sound of the cry coming from suga hyung stick in my head unbothered.

I'm afraid if all of this will bring pain to them. They will be hurt. I just realize how this illness not just effect me but effect people around me too.

The cruel reality is I can't do anything for it. I'm the cause of the pain in their heart. This cancer change everything. Once you have it, you will see the world in different way. Its make me more appreciate the friendship that I have, the family that I have and the support that I have.

But because of this, I'm afraid to hurt them. I'm afraid they will leave me. I'm afraid of everything.

'No Tae! Its better to bruise a heart with the truth than to break one with a lie' My mind said to me. Yes, Its true. When I'm thinking about this again and again. I came into conclusion to tell them. Just tell them, its depend on them if they will leave me or not. If I keep lying,just imagine how they will feel when Its too late. When I can't move anymore.

Yes Tae, Let tell them and accept your reality. Sometime you just need to let go and see what happens. The truth hurts more if you keep running from it. I have to face it and deal with it. With all my effort.

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Author note

Yo! Another update after I don't even know when the last time I updated ㅠㅠ I'm sorry!

Its been a very busy for me. Exam is just around the corner. So, a lot have coming in my way.

Not to mention the highlight reel that shooked my world! Why is bighit doing all of this???????

Okay, I know most of you want Tae to tell the members but I don't know why when I'm planing to do that its look like its too rushing. I was planning it to be in this chapter but I don't even realize I wrote that many words that I think its too long to put that on this chapter. Cause many things are coming when he talk about it to the members. Or you want me to rush averything and end this book earlier? I'm sorry if my book is progressing too slow.

Feel free to correct my mistakes. Vote and comment if this book deserve it.

Lastly, stay happy, stay positive and stay healthy! I love you guys soooooo much. I'm sorry for my mistakes and Thanks for your time <3