Chapter 28: A Little Help

Hiding in Chase's room sucked. I didn't want to be stuck in here for an entire month. Which, hopefully, I may not have to. I can probably just sneak out and stay at my castle and hide in my room. But then again, I completely forgot. . . It was destroyed. There was no going back. How could I not remember that? Well, I have been locked in a prison cell. And that, was because my mother was greedy and wanted to have the throne when in fact, there was not a bone in my body that wanted the crown. This really does suck.

"Are you hungry? Want some lunch?" Chase asked me getting up from his bed. My stomach grumbled loudly answering him before even I could. "What are you hungry for? Pasta? Pizza? Sandwiches? Anything else?"

"I really don't care. I just want something in my belly." I said with a shrug but came to actually think about it. I was hungry. "Sandwiches sound nice. With chips. And some fruit. Oh, and can you get me a juice box?"

"You got it!" Chase said before leaving the bedroom leaving me alone. I let out a heavy sigh. I was starving. There was no memory from the last time of sticking food in my mouth. My stomach felt smaller. And so did my appetite. But today, I needed something. My body was growing weaker as it was getting tinier. It could've been over a week of not eating. There was no certainty of when. Everything has been hectic and chaotic. There was no telling.

After a while, Chase had finally came back. He had a huge picnic basket that wasn't exactly discreet. He took out everything. Half foot long sandwiches were pulled out from the basket along with a big bag of chips, a bowl of mixed berries, and a glass bottle of juice, that was definitely not in a box.

"What is this?" I asked him while examining the bottle reading the fancy cursive words.

"It said cranberry. I don't know." Chase shrugged while stuffing his face. I looked closer at the label.

"Dude, this is alcohol! We're in a children's tale." I said shaking my head at him. "We can't drink this. We're too young and it's dumb. Where'd you even get this?"

"In the juice cabinet." said Chase matter of factly, a smug grin in his cheeks playfully. "Look, don't worry about it. Just eat your sandwich or I will." Chase shoved his food in his mouth.

With a sigh of doubt, the bottle of wine was put away before eating my sandwich that was partly dry. It needed mayo. Perhaps a few vegetables too. I couldn't complain. I was so hungry I forgot how it felt to chew. It really has been a long time hasn't it?

I couldn't even finish the whole sandwich. I had taken a few bites out of half of it and had two strawberries already feeling ill to my stomach knowing I wouldn't be able to finish the rest. Chase shrugged and ate the rest of my food quickly after he finished his.

"So now what?" I asked him, crossing my arms over my torso looking at him as he began to put things back in the basket. "What are we supposed to do now? I don't want to just sit around waiting until it's my aunts birthday."

"Wanna sneak out?" Chase asked me. I blinked at him oddly.

"You? You wanna sneak out? Are you sick?" I asked him curiously. This was entirely new. Chase was always about following the rules. What on earth has got him to change his mind?

"Yeah, why not?" He shrugged his shoulders. "We could use the fresh air. Besides, I know a place you haven't been to yet. It's a hideout of mine not even the Red Queen can find. If she, ya know, looked for it herself for once and got off her fat butt once in awhile."

"That's so mean. I'm in." I gave him a smile. He smiled back. He went to go get dressed and to put his armor back on.

"Just give me a minute." said Chase while getting his armor polished and ready.

"Do you always need your armor?" I let out a sigh. "It's pointless, don't you think?"

"That's your opinion." said Chase before leaving it alone. Instead, he put on his shoes and tiptoed toward his bedroom door. I rolled my eyes walking normally behind him. He opened the door, looking both ways before making a hither motion with his hand for me to follow him. He moved quickly, swiftly down the hall as I struggled to keep up with him. Man, I need to exercise. I'm getting slow.

"Come on, slowpoke." Chase said taking my hand in his as he pulled me along to match his pace. We went to the corner of the hallway, him leaning over to take a glance. "Come on. Coast is clear."

I looked behind me to see if anyone noticed me or anything. Thankfully it was quiet and empty. Suspiciously empty. It didn't make sense. That was until we got down a flight of stairs. It was full of guards. Of course. Chase was quick, swift-footed as he devised a plan fast to get us out of the castle. We made it to the last flight of stairs, only having to get to the kitchen where the back door was. We stopped in front of a hidden corner as I was the lookout to see if anyone was coming.

"Dun dun dun dun dun." Chase was beginning to sing, getting excited. I glanced back seeing him dancing along to his own music trying to be cool and whatnot. It was so dumb and dorky I could laugh, but I held back my tongue.

"Would you quiet down?" I hissed at him, glancing back at him at his horrible dance moves. It was so funny. But now wasn't the time. "This is supposed to be sneaking out. A stealth mission. Being sneaky. You'll draw attention to us."

Chase smirked at me acting suddenly silly. "If anything is going to draw attention, it's that little face of yours." My eyes widened at him, my mouth slightly falling open feeling my face hot. He realized what he said pierced his lips tightly out of embarrassment. "I'm sorry. That was out of proportion. But I meant that in a nice way! I'm not saying you're ugly."

"You think I'm ugly?" I gasped at him.

"No! I think you're very pretty! You're beautiful. I was just being stupid." Chase said quickly.

"Yeah, you were." I said with a frown, turning back around seeing that the guard just went to a new area. "The coast is clear. Let's go." I moved quickly, avoiding Chase a little because of what he said. I made it to the kitchen, throwing the door open and making a dash towards the back door. When I finally made it outside, Chase caught up right behind me.

"Iz, look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it in a bad way. It was taken out of context." said Chase trying to own up to his mistake. I pierced my lips, nibbling on my bottom lip looking away. I suddenly felt insecure inside. I couldn't help but think that maybe I was. Why am I like this? I need to get over myself.

"Are you going to show me your hideout or not?" I asked him, ignoring the last bit. I didn't know whether to believe him or not. My judgement was clouded by my own fears and insecurities. I hated the way my behavior is and how I reacted.

Chase led the way, leading me toward the pool of tears, but in a different direction nearby. It was past all the crooks and crannies as we were getting a little close to March Manor.

"Where are we going?" I asked him as he led me deep, further into the forest and away from the paths. "If you wanted to kill me you should've just said so. I might've said yes."

"Oh, stop. I'm not going to kill you." Chase said. We made it to a clearing of the woods. It was nothing special. But there was a hammock and had pretty mushroom chairs. "This is it. I come here when I need some peace and quiet. Its not too far from Hearts Castle which is nice. It's a great place to nap or just to relax. Especially at night time. You can see the stars so clearly."

"It is calming." I agreed with a nod. We hung out for a bit, hanging around in his favorite spot. He let me relax in his hammock while he laid on the grass as he stared up at the sky much like I was, watching whatever clouds remained and in a shaped form that wasn't corrupted by the curse.

"Chase, I'm sorry." I said to him, getting myself to sit up in the hammock. He remained still on the ground. "I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I had no right to be so mean to you. I'm so sorry."

"Apology accepted if you come lay on the grass beside me." said Chase patting a spot next to him. I let out a sigh before getting up and onto the soft grass, laying my head next to his as I looked up at the clouds. "It's okay, Iz. I was never mad. I understand where you're coming from."

"You've never understood me before," I said with a shake of my head, "so why try now?"

Chase sat up halfway to lean on his arm, his chin on his palm as he stared at me while I watched the clouds to glance up at him.

He let out a heavy sigh, drawing a long breath. "We never really hung out when we were younger. I felt bad for not getting to know you. And when you. . . lost a parent, I wanted to be there for you. I lost both of mine. So I understand how that is. I didn't want you to think that you were alone. And when I found out your mom left, I wanted to make sure you were okay. But you were in that prison and sneaking out with Alistair and Bunny all the time. I didn't think there would've been time for me. You were trying to find ways to cope. I only wanted to make sure that you weren't feeling alone. Because I was. I felt abandoned, betrayed, lost, and hurt. It does hurt. And it's okay to feel hurt. But it's also okay to learn from it, and heal from it so you can move past it and grow. What's not okay is to hold onto that pain forever. Or it will always come back to haunt you. And you don't deserve to feel that way forever. You deserve happiness just as much as the next person."

I sat up, staring at him trying not to cry. "I. . . thank you. That means a lot to me, thank you." I didn't know what else to say.

"Don't worry about it," said Chase nonchalantly with a shrug of his shoulders. He leaned over with a smirking smile. "So does this mean we're cool now?" I chuckled at him, only turning back to the sky watching the clouds lazily pass by. Watching them slowly graze past the trees, I began to doze off, falling asleep in the middle of the day as the breeze drifted against my cheek like a kiss.

"Good morning, sleepyhead." I felt a nudge at my shoulder, a slight tapping waking me from my nap. I slightly turned over on my side, feeling the soft grass underneath me as fingers curled around the strands of green. "Do you want a piggyback ride back to the castle?"

I let out a yawn as I strained to open my eyes. Barely a couple of inches away was Chase laying across from me, his gorgeous blue eyes staring deeply with the slightest tint of pink to his cheeks. He was staring so intensely, his focus drawing all of his attention toward me in an enchanting haze that felt cloudy, distant, but with a growing yearn that was unexplainable. With a hand under his chin for support on the grass, it looked remarkably close to mine, only centimeters away from touching the tips of my fingers.

I didn't bother to respond as I let out a small nod to accept his offer. Chase got to his feet where he slid me on his back with my legs underneath his arms and wrapped around his waist as he carried me through the forest. My arms wrapped around his shoulders and neck, holding on gently as I buried my head close to his where casually was resting on the top of his head, feeling immensely taller as I stared overhead at the path. I could smell his hair. It was just as Nova had described it. And she was absolutely right, it did smell wonderfully delicious.

Chase brought us both out of the woods and into the clearing, heading all the way back to the castle. Once we reached the castle grounds I hopped off of his back so we could sneak back inside. Reaching the kitchen doors, Chase peaked his head in to see if the coast was clear. He glanced back at me and gave me the okay, following him inside as we stealthily made our way back to the staircase all the way back up to his room. He opened the door and we snuck inside his bedroom door getting inside.

Chase took off his shoes and went to one side of his room, opening a door and going inside while I was left in the bedroom. I didn't know what room he was in. From my own understanding, it could've been a walk in closet or a bathroom. It was proven to be the restroom when I heard a toilet flushing and the sink turning on to signify he was washing his hands. Well, at least he's civilized. Soon enough, he came walking out shaking his hands dry. His eyes glanced over at me quickly before looking away, turning toward another door where I assumed was to be his closet. He opened the door and stepped inside, closing it behind him to most likely change into something else.

Chase came back out from his closet completely changed into some loose shorts and a plain T-shirt. He's never looked so oddly casual that it was starting to be weird to see him in such a way that looked so. . . normal.

"If you ever need to use the bathroom," he said while pointing at the door at the opposite side of the room, "it's right there. Showers, baths, anything you need to do, just go ahead right there."

"Don't you find it weird for me to be rooming with you?" I asked him, an eyebrow raised. He seemed to be taken back a little, almost as if the thought never really crossed his mind. A slight blush was at his cheeks as he took the time to actually think about it.

"Well, I don't know. . . I've never roomed with anyone before. So this is kinda new to me too." Chase said blushing even harder. "But it'll be fun, right? After all, I'm the only one that knows this castle by heart. And unfortunately, your only hope at this point. I wouldn't know another soul even willing enough to be helpful. Especially towards the daughter of. . . well, you know."

I let out a sigh of despair, my eyes coming to a close for a moment. "I do, and it sucks. But I really appreciate all the help, Chase."

"Of course!" he said quickly. "Anything for you, Princess."

"I told you not to call me that," my mouth moved before I could think. With a glare toward him, he backed up a few steps noticing my seriousness. His eyebrows furrowed, as if he couldn't understand as to why I snapped at him so unexpectedly. My bottom lip pierced with my teeth in a matter of realizing what I had done.

"I'm so sorry, it's a force of habit." He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, his eyes darting to the side for a. "You prefer Izzy, right? I'll try to refrain from the formalities, Your High — oops, there I go again."

With a defeated sigh, I walked up to him defiantly making his face blush. For someone as confidant as he is, he sure gets flustered easily. "Hey, I'm not any different from you. There's no need for the honorifics. We're on equal ground here. Just call me Izzy. Besides, I never wanted to be a princess. What good could I do that my mother already hasn't?" Chase nodded his head.

Chase was silent, his gaze following the ivory carpet as if he was having a conversation inside his head. He was perplexed as if he didn't know how to respond back to me. The conversation felt awkward, hesitant and almost distant. There was never something so raw right in front of me from another person that expressed their emotions with such complexity. It was odd to me. In a way, it appeared to be as a mirror of myself in an odd way.

His blue eyes shifted back to me. "If it's worth anything to you, I think you would be an excellent ruler. I have complete faith in you."

"How could you be so sure?" I said with a roll of my eyes, suddenly on the defense again. I didn't understand it. All of his questioning was driving a nerve up my spine, feeling heated and emotional again. Except only it didn't make sense to me.

He took a step closer to me making me subconsciously inch a step backward. "Because I know my destiny is to help you restore balance to our world."

I gave him a blank stare. I almost wanted to laugh. "What are you talking about? We're not restoring anything. What the heck am I doing exactly?"

"You're the guide. You're more than just a ruler. Don't you even know your own destiny?" Chase looked at me funnily.

"What guide? Who said I'm a guide?" I asked him raising a brow. I was so confused and quite skeptical. He had to be joking.

"Your story." said Chase blankly. "To guide the next Alice through the chess board game of Wonderland to help him win. To foresee the future and guide him through the fifth rank."

"And then live as a nonsensical shouting sheep until I flee cowardly into a bowl of soul, I'm well aware. No thanks." I held up a hand to him not wanting him to continue. It's so humiliating. "Does anyone care as to what I want to do?"

"Yes." Chase said with a nod. "I only assumed you wanted to help Alistair no matter the consequence of your story because you wanted him to be victorious as yourself."

"Victorious as my—? Oh, no. I'm not victorious. I've never done anything remarkable. And I won't. Please, why do we keep talking about this?"

Chase peaked up full of interest. "Because, I want to help you achieve what's meant to be done. Why don't you want to fulfill your destiny? It's your own story. Isn't that exciting?"

I scoffed. "No, because I'm not a coward! Or a jerk! That's not something I want to be. I will not turn around and abandon everyone I love like. . . like my mother had! That may have been what she had done, but it doesn't make it right. I will not be perceived as the bad guy in this story! That's all I've been ever looked at. And they want me to accept it, to glorify it like I'm some champion of chaos. That shouldn't be me. I want to to do good. I want to be good and accomplish good things for the better of myself and my people."

"Let's do it then," said Chase simply making me do a double take. "I'm serious. I want to prove myself to you. I can help you. It would give me the greatest honor to be at your service."

"Okay, stop." I shook my head at him as he began to bow, straightening up at me with confusion. "Don't start with that. This isn't some obligation. You're not my servant. You're my friend and I will not make it to appear as a pawn of advancement."

"What?" Chase retorted with a chortle. "No. I'm doing this because I want to. I remain loyal to those of the court of justice and valor."

"V-valor? I'm not a soldier!" I shook my head at him vigorously. "Where are you getting this nonsense? That isn't me."

"I wasn't saying that," said Chase swiftly, "I mean that you're fearless. You have a fighting spirit with virtue and power. Don't you ever notice that? I thought people were more aware of themselves."

"I am self-aware!" I barked, a heat to my cheeks from the compliment he had of me.

Suddenly, I felt small. I just did it, didn't I? I'm not even thinking before I act. Becoming loud and hostile, always on the defense. Was he right? Have I been the jerk this whole time? Was I really the toxic one here? I know I'm not perfect, but was it really always me?

"Your attitude sure proves that," said Chase straightforwardly, not even a hint of being snarky against me. An exasperated sigh escaped my lips realizing my own self entitlement. I was really the bad guy wasn't I? I have been all along.

My teeth latched onto my bottom lip, knowingly looking up at him awkwardly. "Chase, I'm an idiot. I apologize if I've ever offended or hurt you in any way. Could you forgive me?"

"Of course, Iz." Chase said with a smile of reassurance. "Sorry if this is off topic, but are you hungry? I'm starving. Let's go get some food."

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