Chapter 16: A Friend in Need

I heard a knock on my bedroom door. I groaned, turning my back from the door so I could just ignore it hoping it would go away. The banging on the door only got louder and more annoying.

I groaned getting out of my bed while taking my blanket with me as a scuffled along the floor with my covers wrapped around me like a burrito. I displeasingly opened the door to see Alistair and Bunny side by side together. I looked down seeing both their hands in each other's. I scowled feeling my anger rise within me before pushing it back down to ignore it.

"What's up?" I asked trying to not appear disinterested. Well, I was. I was upset and now confused. Are they a thing now too? Just when I thought things couldn't get worse.

"Guess what!" Bunny exclaimed happily. I grimaced. Here it comes.

"What?" I said not caring in the slightest. I magically in my mind put a wall between us to protect my emotions so I wouldn't get hurt again. I just didn't want my best friends falling for each other. That means. . . less time with me. I didn't want to lose them too. They're the only true people I have left in my life. I can't have them abandon me too. . . But then that would be selfish. I would be just like my mother. And I didn't want that. They deserve to be happy. They look happy together. Even if it does mean excluding me.

"We," said Bunny but not without her cute little giggle. Alistair nodded for her to continue. "We're dating now! Isn't that hexciting?!"

And there it is.

I put on the biggest smile I could. I was trying everything in my power to not cry.

"I'm so proud! My two best friends! Together! At last! I'm so happy I-I could just cry!" I said loudly as a heavy tear fell as I said it. I blinked the rest away quickly so they couldn't notice.

"Aww we knew you'd be happy for us," said Bunny with her pretty cherry lip smile. I glanced at Alistair who's eyebrows raised at me questionably. He knew I was upset. How does he always see right through me? I'm like an open book to him.

"Yeah! I'm so happy!" I smiled so big it hurt. "Wh-why don't you guys do something together to celebrate your new found relationship. I'll stay here so I'll be out of your way. You love birds have fun!"

I eagerly pushed them out of the door so they could leave me alone as I slammed it behind them on the way out. I immediately crashed to the floor against the door sobbing in the palms of my hands.

Why am I being so selfish? Why can't I just be happy for them? Why does it hurt so much? I shouldn't be feeling this way. I should be happy for them. Don't I want them to be? Of course I do! They deserve it. They deserve each other. Everyone deserves their happily ever after with someone they love. Supposedly that isn't meant for me. But then why does it make me feel so miserable?

A sudden knock on the door broke me from my thoughts. I quickly got to my feet and fixed myself running my hands down my face to wipe away my tears. I saw black on my hands but before I could even look to wipe away the mascara rolling down my cheeks the door swept open. Alistair walked inside alone as Bunny was no where in sight.

"W-where's Bunny?" I asked as he came inside the room. His eyebrows furrowed looking at me worriedly.

"I came to grab something she forgot. Are you crying?" Alistair asked me talking a step closer. I backed up nervously hitting my shin against my coffee table. By surprise it completely took me off guard causing me to fall backward. By instinct, Alistair had caught me in his arms from crashing into all my beautiful Wonderlandian chinaware.

Our eyes met. His crystal blue meeting my sapphire eyes as his expression of sudden shock before I could plummet into the table breaking everything. He brought me back to my feet as he looked at me oddly. Something was definitely on his mind.

"What's wrong?" such a simple question with such a complex answer. I didn't want to tell him. He was my best friend. I couldn't tell him one of the reasons I'm upset is because he's dating Bunny Blanc. It wasn't even the full truth.

"I. . . I broke up with Dexter." I said with a small cry that turned into a sob. I couldn't help but tear up again. Why am I like this? I hate crying in front of people.

"No wonder you seemed so heartbroken when we came inside. It probably didn't help that Bunny announced that we're dating too." Alistair said. How does he do it? Figuring me out just like that. . .

"Why are you two dating?" I asked him bluntly. I bit my tongue realizing what I said as it was too late. That sounded rude.

"Bunny said she likes me. And well, I kinda do too. Then again, she wasn't my first choice but she's the one that confessed out to me. But hey, she could be just what I need instead, ya know? To get over the first, you go for the second."

"That's exactly what Dexter told me." I said looking down toward the floor. "But he still likes Raven. So I ended it like that so he could work things out with her. They deserve each other."

"You sound so sad when you say that," said Alistair as he used a finger to my chin so I was forced to look up at him. He was so sincere. He was so close to me. He was only three inches above me with a little difference in height.

"I am sad." I turned away from him going to my bed and sitting on top of it putting my blanket around me completely including over my head. I looked away, staring out the window where Bunny was talking to her friends Briar Beauty and Apple White. She looks so happy with them. She fits in so nicely. How come it's always me that feels like an outsider?

A hand was placed on my knee. I jolted up staring at Alistair who sat beside me on the bed. I hadn't even noticed.

"I miss Wonderland," I whispered to him speaking out my thoughts, "I miss our friends. I miss my home. Being here sucks and it's not the same. It's weird and I don't like it. I just want things back to where they were before the curse. I even miss us. Now that we're here I hardly see you anymore. It's so different now. Being grouped together with different people to get along and forced to interact with strangers. Bunny is getting along nicely with everyone. She fits in wonderfully. Yet, I don't at all. I tried to with Dexter. He's so sweet but it seems he isn't for me. He's more interested in Raven it appears. Even though he tried, there was something lacking. I'm not sure what, but I feel it could be love. He didn't love me. I don't think he was ever going to grow to love somebody like me. So I just hope that you and Bunny have that kind of connection. Just love each other, okay? You both deserve to be happy. Just let it be for love and nothing else."

"Yeah," said Alistair looking away while scratching the back of his head in thought.

"So who was your first choice?" I asked him now sitting cross legged and hugging the pillow in my lap. His face turned red while biting his lower lip nervously, an anxious tic I thought was cute. It made me smile a bit.

"Huh?" He looked around the room nervously not sure of how to answer.

"What you said earlier. That Bunny wouldn't have been your first choice." I recalled thinking about it. "You said there was someone else. You never told me you had a crush on anyone else before. Who is it?"

"I-it doesn't matter," Alistair shook his head smiling nervously, "besides, I-I'm with Bunny. It would be weird —"

"How? I mean, yeah, you liked somebody first. But did you seek them out? Do you know if they like you back?"

"I thought you were all for it when Bunny announced we're together?" Alistair said changing the subject.

"That was a lie," I whispered to myself hugging my pillow tightly to my stomach hiding my face so I could only have my eyes to see. I noticed a blond eyebrow raised as he leaned in closer to me.

"Isabella, does that bother you?" He used my full name again. . . How come whenever he says it I'm fine with it? The way it rolls off his tongue. . . I would listen to him say it forever.

"N-no, it's fine. You guys will be cute together." I said looking away. Alistair pushed the pillow down while taking his thumb under my chin to lift it to meet his steady gaze.

"Don't lie to me," he said with the slightest shake of his head. His lips curled into a soft frown, his crystal eyes piercing into mine like stars twinkling in the early morning sky. It was fresh and clear, a new place I wanted to go and get lost in.

I pushed his hand away, looking away as I could feel my cheeks flush. Don't think such stupid things, Izzy. . .

"Don't you have a girlfriend to get back to?" I said rather rudely. Why am I acting so mean all of a sudden? "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be hard on you. All of this stuff is just too new to me. Everything is changing way too fast. Seeing my mom again, losing a relationship, seeing my best friends together. It's weird to me. It's making me irrational and impulsive. I'm sorry if that sounded mean to you. . . I just, I just want. . . I don't even know at this point. It doesn't even matter."

"Yes, it does," said Alistair. "Come on. Don't get yourself down like that. Everything is changing so fast. It's hard to catch up. We were in a land where our logic is different than this logic. It's not easy. But we can get through it together."

"But, now that you're dating Bunny, wouldn't that make it less time for me?" I asked him. My lips quivered into another sob. "I don't want to lose my best friend! You mean the world to me. I can't lose another person. Especially not you. You matter too much."

"You really think that much of me?" He asked me, his eyebrows furrowed with a hopeful gleam in his smile.

"Well, yeah. You're an important person to me. Probably the most important person to me, topping my mom." I said with a gentle laugh. He returned it with a small smile. "But seriously, don't forget about me. I know you'll probably spend a lot of time with her now that you're dating her, but please. . . don't leave me out. D-don't abandon me too. I'm sorry, now I'm just bringing out my issues with abandonment. Ignore me. Now I just seem clingy. I promise I'm not! Okay, maybe a little bit."

"Hey," said Alistair reassuring me with a smile. He took my hand in his and away from hugging my pillow as he held it and gave me an encouraging squeeze. "I'm not ever going to leave you. After all, we're best friends, remember?"

I couldn't help it. I pushed my pillow to the side and discarded the blanket around me. I took him completely off guard when I dived into him wrapping my arms around him into a hug. A simple hand gesture wasn't good enough. I needed him right now. I needed his hugs.

He was warm to the touch, gladly accepting it as his arms snaked around me holding me tightly into him. His head rested above mine for his own comfort knowing he needed it too. I felt at ease as my troubles melted away while feeling calmer to his embrace. His hands reached my shirt pulling it between his fingers as he clutched onto me tightly as if he didn't want to lose hold of me. I stayed there for a moment just holding onto him. I didn't want to let go. He held me tightly as we remained together for a moment just holding each other in our arms. I missed his hugs. It was never enough to me. He has the best hugs. They always make me feel better.

"Am I ruining a moment?" said a voice from the door of my bedroom. My eyes opened, pulling away from Alistair to meet Bunny Blanc staring in the entryway.

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