What have I done?

I should never have let those words leave my lips.

I should never have given Sungjae my consent.

I should never have let him go.

But then again, was he ever mine to begin with?

I shake my head to myself. What am I going to do? Tell the school Hyuk and I broke up so he could be with Sungjae? Let my reputation get thrown into the ditch? No. Its more than that.

I should have treasured him when he was still called mine. I should have hugged him more, expressed my affection whilst I had the chance. I should have... I should have.. i should have.. regrets pour onto me like relentless waves, cold and unforgiving.

That feeling, when you can't bear to see someone else..  with someone else. The intense pressure, pain, cutting through your heart like a hot knife through butter. The uncontrollable urge to mutilate you inner mouth with your teeth. All these multiplied by a hundred when you stupidly allowed this to happen. And when that person is you stepbrother.

Yes. I, Lee Hongbin, admit that at 17 years old, I have  fallen for my stepbrother.

And tomorrow, i will see him , along with everyone at school, leave my side to be with someone else he probably loves. More than he loves me, anyway.
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I dont bother to wait for Sanghyuk to go to school together. It just adds to the pain.

Sungjae told me his plan. He said he would ask him out during Lunch time, in front of everyone so as to "reduce confusion". I merely grunted. I mean, I already expect Hyuk to leave me for Sungjae. They have been best friends for years, and I have been his stepbrother for like, what... Half a year? There's no way he'd fall for me in such a short period of time.

Time seems to drag on and on for an eternity, the only thing keeping me from faceplanting onto my Geography textbook is the pure sense of sadness that is about to come.

I feel a tap on my shoulder.
"Hyung? You okay?"

I turn to see Hyuk, his eye smile that i have grown to adore evident on his face. But instead of smiling back, my spirits lifted, I find myself trying to hold back tears. Is this what Im going to give up today?

I turn coldly away from him before he can see me cry, but then I realised that this probably increased my chances of him leaving me today.

Shut up Hongbin, you don't even have a slight chance.. 
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The time has come, and my hands are quivering like crazy. Sungjae Nods at me in acknowledgement before leaving  class,  an oblivious Hyuk in tow. I quietly follow behind.

Dragging him to the middle of a crowd of crazy students, Sungjae exclaimed at the top of his voice. "Han Sanghyuk!"

This gets everyone's attention, forming a human ring around the two

Sungjae scoops Sanghyuks soft hands into his own. I look down and try to hide myself in the crowd.

Its for the best. Sanghyuk doesn't love me anyway.

" I.. i have known you ever since you were a child."

My breathing gets heavier.

" We've seen each other grow up."

I don't think I can take the loss

" And for all these years... I... I have had an affection for you"

So do I

" So... Han Sanghyuk. May I ask you a question?"

Sanghyuk looks stunned.

I......i have made a decision

"Will you be my boyfriend??"

Sanghyuk 's eyes fly open, mouth slightly ajar.
"Sungjae... " He begins.

But I dont let him finish.
Sorry Sungjae, promise or no promise, there is no way I'm  letting Sanghyuk go.

Pushing through the murmuring crowd of anxious students, waiting for Sanghyuk 's reply, i reach the two of them, hold him by the waist and kiss him.

I instantly melt into His warm lips I forget that we are surrounded by people. Its just me and him. Im so afraid he'll disappear, I tighten my grip around his waist and deepen the kiss as much as I can. I dont care that Sungjae is behind me. I dont care about the students' reactions. Its just me and him, and I never wanted this moment to end.

The good thing was, he kissed back.

The bad this was, The principal had seen the whole thing.

Its doesnt take a genius to remember that the Principal is Hyuk's father
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IM SORRY FOR THE LONG HIATUS. I GOT LAZY :(