Paxton Flynn

Two weeks.

It's been two weeks since Sebastian came visiting me in college and it's been two weeks since I've said a more than two words with Diego Royal. I wasn't avoiding him, I was just busy;

"So, what was with the voicemail?" Ryder had cornered me after Seb left still having the message at heart. "What in the world did Diego do to deserve you unfriending him?"

"Really nothing serious," I say, crossing my legs under me on her bed. Her roommate was out and I was in visiting. Not that I couldn't visit while she was around, it's just a lot more comfortable with her out. Leni was seriously scary and not in physical appearance, nope, actually, physically she looked like an angel— small with freckles and glasses. It's her nerdiness and quietness that's scary, like grandma vibes scary. "I was just being dramatic."

"Tell me anyways," Ryder pestered, causing me to roll my eyes.

I told her everything about how I was feeling and how I noticed that day with there's a lot of eye contact involved when I'm with Diego. Like, our friendship is nothing like my friendship with Landon or even my relationship with my brother. I find myself telling him things I wouldn't tell anyone. I find myself smiling and getting super comfortable with him and even when touch is involved. He get super comfortable with me too and I guessed, that day, it dawned on me and frightened me. I don't want to be that boyfriend who goes away for a little while and falls for someone else without even realizing it. And I don't want to indirectly cheat on Sebastian, I'd die.

"What even is cheating?" I asked myself and Ry, freaking out on a bag of chips. "I might have already done it without knowing. Is it only when kissing and sex is involved or just being close to someone in a particular degree count? Does thinking about another person first count? Because, oh my God, the other day I got an A in a pop quiz in a class Diego and I share, the first person I wanted to tell was him. Diego."

Ry chuckled at my predicament and I froze, looking at her and asking with my eyes what was funny. "I'm sorry, it's just, my best friend is so cute. Did I always know this?"

Glaring at her, I stone her chips at her face, causing her to laugh some more. "Ryder Tracey, I'm about having a panic attack and you're swooning?"

"Okay, I don't think this counts as swooning. Does it?"

"Whatever it is, stop. I'm very serious right now."

"Fine, well, I don't know. I'm no long distance relationship expert or cheating expert or just ordinary relationship expert for that matter."

"So, you're useless?"

She glared, "should we call Landon?"

"No," I groaned. "He's just going to make fun of the situation and say he told me so. I can't have him be right Ryder, no fucking way."

"I don't think he's right," she adjusted herself on the bed so her head is lying on my thighs. "You looked pretty great with Sebastian when he came."

"Yeah, when he came."

She rolled her eyes, "you obviously still love Sebastian."

"I do, with all my heart."

"See? No problem."

"I could love two people," I say with a pout. "And not know it until it's too late."

Ryder laughed, "I think you have nothing to worry about. I think you're just comfortable with Diego in a new way you haven't been comfortable with anyone before and it's surprising and freaking you out."

"Really?"

"Yup, and trust me, if I see anything fishy, I would mention it. I'm a Sebastian all the way girl."

Yeah, despite my talk with Ry, I haven't really gotten around to accepting and calling Diego back or meeting him up. Yeah, he gave me a missed call once and I really was going to call back but then procrastination got the better of me. My schedule in school also helped because test were popping up all over the place and I was almost always busy. I hardly got time to call Sebastian even; if I wasn't in class, I was at the library, or at the dance studio with Nancy and friends, or in my dorm studying a text or cooking or helping Sim and Ry study. Yeah, I might also be unconsciously and consciously keeping myself busy. I also avoided all the routes I knew Diego regularly followed to avoid bumping into him and I stayed away from the EatOut as much as I could.

I won't say I didn't miss him, I seriously did but just even thinking about that freaked me out and motivated me to stay away. I didn't need an extra friend to connect to, right? My relationship and mental health was more important. So I chanted to myself and tried so hard to believe it.

Unfortunately, I had my plans and life had it's too.

"So, you're going to be grouped into pairs," our short and round lady lecturer said, trying to stand as tall as possible to look at every single person. "This is a very basic practical, one I'm sure most of you have already encountered back in highschool. You'd be given a dead rat and a living one, all you have to do is follow the rules written on your practical pages and answer all and any questions. I require the highest amount of silence as possible, only you and your partner are allowed to exchange a few words, nothing else, no gossiping or 'catching up' in the lab. I hope I'm understood."

"Yes," I answer to myself even when the class just remained silent. If I looked, I could see Diego's head from where he was sitting. We haven't been pairing up as seatmates for a while, it's either I come super early or almost late. I felt a bit guilty, I wouldn't lie. I can't even look him in the eye.

We were all ushered out our seats to stand in front of the class while the lab attendant and lady lecturer went around dropping dead rats and rats in a tiny cage on each table. When they were done, the lab attendant started calling out pairs to go take a seat and start their particular, apparently the names had no particular order of arrangement because if they did the I wouldn't have heard—

"Diego Royal and Paxton Flynn, seat 16."

I think Diego was expecting it too because none of us moved until our names were called again and then we apologized, going to our table. The tension in the air was choking, or it's just me and my guilt. Diego didn't say a thing to me, he just kept his head up and straight ahead, not even chewing a gum. I could have just kept quiet too and we'd get the practical done with and leave, getting on with our lives and I'd be sure then that whatever friendship we had was gone. I could've. I mean, I was the one who ghosted him out in the first place, what gave me the right to speak. I could've but I couldn't. Paxton Flynn couldn't just shut up.

"No gum today?" I said, then face palmed a million times until the face in my mind got soar and almost fell off.

Diego finally moved his head, looking at me, then at his other side. I was seriously expecting a punch in my real face. "Are you talking to me?"

"Um..." This is that time, whoever controls the universe. Tell the ground to open up and swallow me.

"I mean, you can't be, right?"

I sighed, "I—"

"Don't say you're sorry, Paxton, because we both know you don't mean it," he said looking back straight ahead.

"I actually do," I said, biting on my lip au heart got heavier, my head too.

Diego looked at me, his green eyes looking at me the way I didn't deserve. He poked his tongue into his cheek, looking away once more with a shrug. "It's fine, I mean I expected it. Not everyone can handle the fact that I was once a bully to my very kind. I knew I shouldn't have said shit."

I blinked, "what? Diego, I didn't do whatever because of that story. Of course not."

He looked at me like he didn't believe me. "Then why else did you ghost my ass for two weeks?"

The lady lecturer cleared her throat in our direction but then they weren't done assigning seat so it wasn't that serious.

"Because I'm stupid and I don't deserve a friend like you," I said, which is kind of true. I'm an idiot. Speaking to him now, I realized everything I've been missing out on these weeks.

"Bull," he leaned in closer to me now. "Did your boyfriend put you up to it?"

"No, Sebastian can't do that."

He eyes me, his green eyes looking me over like he's trying to see through me. I feel warm on my face as he looks me over. "Then why?" He leaned back away and his face had a kind of pout now. "There has to be a reason why I've felt like shit this two weeks."

"I'm sorry," I twisted my fingers together until they hurt. "I- I fucked up."

Diego looked me over, then sighed. "Yeah, you did."

I didn't know what to say, I totally understood Diego and if I were him I wouldn't even talk to me. The lecturer, for once in her life helped out by feeling up the silence, "Okay, now that we're all settled, you all have thirty minutes to get this practical done. Remember, minimal talking."

Diego sighed, running a hand through his perfect hair that did not have a beanie this time around. "We should get this over with; which are you going to take care of it?"

"Huh?" I snapped back to the present, reading over what we had to do and realizing that I was stuck between holding a living rat or cutting through a dead one. My face scrunched up as I weighed my options; oh boy. My thoughts got distracted by the sound of Diego's chuckle, when I looked at him however he quickly frowned pretending that the sound didn't come from him. "What?"

"Are you done deciding?" He asked instead and I slowly shook my head.

"I don't know, you pick."

Diego hummed, then opened the tiny cage, taking the white fur creature out. "Scared of a little rat?"

I stared at it, looking completely innocent. "D-does it bite?" Now Diego shamelessly chuckled at my expense. "Come on, I told you I'm scared of all animals."

"Wanna cut?" He gestured to the dead one.

I made a gag sound, "no. Not if I have a choice."

Diego extended the rat to me, "it doesn't bite, just hold it."

I hesitantly put my hand out, shaking a bit. "If it bites me..."

"It would and hold it a bit firmly, you don't want it running off and causing chaos here."

After a lot of shaking, withdrawing and laughing at my expense, I finally held the rat in my hand. It made no attempt to run but I still tried my best to hold it firmly. It was small, soft and could easily slip off. Holding it felt surreal, and it's softness and softness and fragility was unlike what I imagined holding a rat would be like. I dedicated a lot of my attention to looking at the rat in awe and Diego continuously shook his head at me as he basically did our practical for us.

"You always say I'm cute," I started, making Diego look away from the lungs of the dead rat and to me. I raised the rat up to my face. "Am I as cute as Ding?"

"Ding?"

I nodded and touched the pink nose of the rat with my finger, "ding dong," I giggled at myself. "His nose reminds me of a bell, sorry, I named him alone."

Diego turned his body towards me, "you named our thirty minutes lab rat Ding?" I nodded and I see him smile and fight the smile away. "Hm."

"So, am I? As cute?"

He scoffed, "you wish."

I pouted, "you're just saying that because you're mad at me."

"Maybe. Maybe not."

I put Ding in front of my face and spoke as if it was the rat speaking, making my voice a pitch higher. "Come on Simba, forgive Paxty. He's stupid, he knows and he'd never do it again." Diego looked at me and silently turned back to our practical. "Pretty please? He'd buy you burger and cut it up into the weird small corners you like." I saw Diego smile from the corner of my eyes. "He'd buy you chicken feet, turkey feet, hell even, ostrich feet."

Now Diego laughed earning a glare from the lab attendant. He muttered an apology to them and turned to me with a mock glare. "Get that rat away."

I put Ding down but still kept my pouting face at him. "Please Mr Royal? I'd offer my feet too if you're into that kind of thing. And by that I mean, cannibalism. Which, you aren't but then if you want it—"

"Shut up Freshman."

I grinned, "I'd make it up to you, I'm serious."

"I didn't say I've forgiven you."

"Uh-huh, wanna go to the EatOut or my place?"

"Your place?" He asked, taken aback.

I shrugged. "I might or might not be a manageable cook."

----------------------------------------

♥️