Y/N

"You got something there." my boyfriend Beck informed me with a smirk before gently wiping it away from the corner of my mouth. I had to laugh and pushed his hand away from my face.
"I can do that myself."

Beck just grinned and put his arm around my shoulder again, at which point I stiffened a bit but leaned against his shoulder anyway.
We were the first at the table, while the others were slow to join us. Andrew and Tori came first, followed by Cat and Robbie, and Jade last. Jade- I felt her snide gaze on me, as I do every lunch break, before she dropped into her seat next to Beck.

Jade had had it in for me since I started dating her ex 6 months ago. But I wouldn't be me if I didn't bite back. I knew exactly how to provoke someone like Jade, and I enjoyed it to the fullest when it worked.

I felt her eyes on me as I took one of my fries and put it in my mouth, which is why I gave her a quick glance. She stared into my eyes and made no effort to turn away. The corner of my mouth twitched upward and I winked at her, whereupon she did turn away.

I couldn't help but let out a small laugh before shoving another fry into my mouth.

Before I knew it, my boyfriend was grabbing some of my food as well, which made me gasp indignantly.
"That's mine," I pouted as Beck chewed my food with relish.

Beck raised an eyebrow. "Don't make such a pouty face now."

"But you're stealing my food," I retorted, still annoyed. He laughed out loud and gave me a quick kiss.

"Happy now?"

I looked thoughtfully into the air before slowly shaking my head.

"Then what do you want?" Amusement sparkled in his eyes.

"Mmmmm.", I just grumbled, which made him roll his eyes and lean in to kiss me again, but longer this time.

"But you're okay now?"

"Well actually I was going to ask you to buy back the fry you just stole from me, but that works too," I grunted and continued eating my fry.

Beck just shook his head with a grin before continuing to talk to Andre.

-

I was throwing my books in my locker when it slammed shut right on time.
"Perfect timing, thank you. ", I said untouched and was about to turn around when I felt a hand on my wrist.

I groaned as I was pulled into the janitor closet by my 'enemy'.

"What do you want, Jade?", I asked annoyed. She slammed the door and turned to me.

"Can you please stop rubbing my nose in your perfect relationship?" she hissed at me.

I looked at her, confused.
"Excuse me?"

"Look, I know me and Beck weren't the best couple. We fought all the time while you guys are perfect. All I hear all the time is giggling and kissing and it upsets me beyond belief!" she pouted.

I couldn't help but smile a small, amused smile.
" Jade. Beck and I are not perfect. And we're certainly not happy. We argue, only we keep those arguments to ourselves. Your fights came from you being jealous and not keeping it to yourself, but always saying when something bothered you. You don't know how much I admire you. You don't put up with anything. Do you think I'm cool with other women flirting with him and him not doing anything about it? No, when you look at him like you adore him and I can't do anything about it. I know I'm just a little distraction anyway. I'm just there to make you jealous. I heard him. "

A knot formed in my throat, and I did my best to suppress the tears I'd been keeping to myself for too long.

"I gave up on our relationship a long time ago. I'm only playing along because I know he really wants you back. It's ironic, the first time I slept with him, he moaned your name, not mine. And that kind of thing happens all the time. It's not 'I love you, Y/N' , it's 'I love you, Jade'. You know, at first I did mind. But now I don't care. I never had a chance to be loved. He didn't even bother to pretend he cared about me. We don't even see each other outside of school anymore. I just fooled myself into thinking that he really cared about me. But no. Come on, Jade. Go get him. I don't care. "

Tears ran down my cheek. Energetically, I wiped the wet one away from my cheeks.

I avoided Jade's gaze until she placed a finger under my chin, lifting it slightly.
Guilt was written all over her face.

" I'm sorry. ", she almost groaned unhearable.

"It's okay. It's just sad that it worked out."

"What?"

"I can see the look on your face, can't I?", I replied, laughing almost silently. You could have thought I was crying, too, because it sounded so desperate.

Jade looked at me silently. She would probably yell at me. Or beat me up. One of the two. But what she did was quite unexpected.
She gently took my face in her hands and smiled slightly at me.

I closed my eyes briefly, enjoying this brief moment of sincere attention.

"Look at me." she whispered softly. I opened my eyes again and returned her gaze.

"Don't be ridiculous. I don't want Beck back."

"Really?" My voice broke off near the end.

She eyed me closely. "Yes. Really. Though I thought I did want this. Maybe the first two months you were together. Everything after that, I was just lying to myself. I wasn't jealous because Beck was with you. I was jealous because I want you. I want you so bad, it's already making me look stupid. ", she breathed. I felt her warm breath, thats how close she already was to my face.

We were silent for a moment, chaos raging in my head. I had to sort out my thoughts first.
"But how do you want me? "

She looked at me, confused.
"How do you mean?"

"Do you want me in a sexual sense? Or are you in love with me?"
The words just came out of me without me being able to control myself. I should probably be ashamed of myself, but showed no reaction at all. I just watched her.

"What I feel for you goes deeper than sexual desire."

"And how can I be sure you're not lying to me? That you're not just doing this to get me to break up with Beck? And that you're not just fucking with me to make fun of me?"

The look on her face betrayed her. For a second, just one, regret flashed in her eyes. Maybe it was also the feeling of guilt. But it was enough to send a thousand needles through my heart. I bit my lip to suppress more tears. I wasn't sure why it bothered me so much, but it certainly hurt.

"I should have known." My voice sounded mocking, but still pathetically hurt. "You don't have to pretend with me. I'm breaking up with Beck. You'll get together and everything will be fine. But in return, I never want to talk to you again. I don't want to have to look into those fucking lying, manipulative eyes again," I nagged, yanking her hands away from me.

" If you dare to even look at me again, I will claw your fucking eyes out. Fuck you, West. "
By now my voice didn't sound hurt, it just sounded cold.
And as dramatic as that may sound, that's how I felt. Completely empty.

The girl in front of me said nothing. She just avoided my piercing gaze, and that was certainly enough of an answer.
I twisted the corners of my mouth into a pitiful smile before disappearing out of the closet, leaving her behind.