*sensitive topics coming up in this chapter such as mentions of suicide attempt & overdose*

Chapter twenty three
Awakening

Penelope was able to track Ivy's phone to a motel not to far from the city, Spencer called the ambulance and Hotchner to let him know where they were going. Nobody knew what they were going to face when they saw Ivy, wether she was dead, dying or still fighting but everybody prepared themselves for the worse case scenario.

Derek, Emily and JJ were standing outside of the motel waiting to hear an update on how's she was doing when Spencer and Hotchner pulled up onto the scene.

"How is she" Spencer called as he slammed his car door shut.

"They haven't told us anything yet because we're not immediate family" Emily answered as Hotch walked straight over to the paramedics.

Everyone waited in silence as Hotch continued to talk to the paramedic, Rossi's car was pulling into the parking lot as Hotch made his way across to the rest of the team.

"At the moment she's stable... it looks like she only had the drugs in her system for about fifteen minutes before the paramedics arrived" Hotchner delivered the news as everyone took a moment to breathe.

"So she's okay" Spencer asked as Rossi put his hand on the boys shoulder.

"At the moment she's stable that could potentially change but it's looking optimistic" Hotchner answered as the paramedics came walking out of the motel with Ivy lying unconscious on the stretcher.

"How did everything get this bad" Spencer muttered as Derek turned to face him.

"Nobody could have seen this coming... everyone has demons Spencer and for a split second hers won but she's a fighter, she'll get through this and we'll all be here to help her" Derek spoke as Caitlin came running towards them.

"What's going on... I got you're voicemail is she okay where is she... I can't have another friend die on me" Caitlin panicked as she looked around frantically.

"It's okay Caitlin... everything is going to be okay the paramedics have taken her into the hospital now and she's stable so where going to head up there now after the ambulance" JJ spoke to her sister as the rest of the team began to quickly make there way to there cars.

"Okay I'm coming with you to the hospital" Caitlin muttered as JJ agreed. The two girls hopped into there car and drove all the way to the hospital in silence.

Hours went by and nobody heard any news on how Ivy was feeling, all of the team were waiting for updates in the waiting room. Penelope brought everyone up a coffee and just when she was about to sit down the doctor came walking towards them.

"Hello are you all here for Ivy Hotchner" he asked as everyone nodded there heads in agreement.

"The good news is there's no lasting damage to her brain or anything major but the bad news is that she will need to be monitored for the next couple of days and then a mental health nurse will ask her a couple of questions and we'll take it from there... this won't just fade away and I need you all to be prepared for that. When Ivy wakes up she'll be confused possibly angry that it didn't work and that will be hard for you all to hear but that's how she's feeling and it's really important that at the moment you all try you're best not to invalidate her feelings. This will be a long road but with the right resources, family and friends she will make it through this" the doctor spoke optimistically as everyone thanked him for everything he's done.

"Two people can go into see her at one time just try not to overcrowd her... she will wake up soon and I'm sure she'd love to see a familiar face once she's awake, she's in room number twelve it's just down the hall and it's the first door you'll see on the right" he spoke as he pointed in the direction of her room.

Spencer and Hotchner decided that they'd be there with her when she finally wakes up, both of them had absolutely no idea how she was going to feel when she opens her eyes but they were just happy that she was given a second chance at life.

"Do you think she'll remember what happened" Spencer asked as they both took a seat on either side of the bed.

"I honestly have no clue... I just hope she's not in pain" Hotch answered as Spencer looked at the girl in front of him.

"She looks so small and fragile" he whispered as Hotch began to speak.

"He made her like this... Austin turned her into this person she was happy before him and he turned her world completely upside down and I should have left Foyet alone I shouldn't have continued to antagonize him... " Hotch snapped as Spencer cut him off.

"None of this is you're fault... it's no one's fault except for Austin and Foyet they both took someone important away from her and they both done it in front of her as well... that's got to leave a huge mark no wonder she didn't want to be here anymore" Spencer thought.

"I could have done more to help her..." Hotch muttered.

"There was n...nothing you could have done to help me dad" Ivy stuttered as she opened her eyes.

"Oh my little baby girl" Hotchner cried as he leaned over and planted a kiss on his daughters head.

"I'm so sorry... I'm so so sorry.. I can't believe I done that to you I never meant to hurt you I promise" Ivy panicked as the memory of what she'd done finally dawned on her.

"You have nothing to apologize for you were hurting and you thought that was the only option you had but I want you to know that it's not the only option you have anymore okay... you got a second chance and you have friends and family who love you more then anything and we're going to help you through this" Hotchner spoke as he held onto his daughters hand.

"What if I can't get through it... what if I can't carry it any more" she cried as Spencer leaned in closer to her.

"We can all carry it together... you don't have to carry it on you're own anymore" he spoke softly as he pushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

"I'm sorry I never wanted to hurt anyone I just wanted the pain to stop" she cried as Hotch squeezed her hand.

"I know baby... I know and everything is going to be okay I promise, I'll get you all the help you need okay and you've nothing to be sorry about" Hotch spoke.

"I just want everything to go back to how it used to be" she whispered to herself.

Hotchner felt horrible as he sat by Ivy's side and continued to lie straight to her face, there was a moment where he planned on telling her what he was hiding but he knew that it was far too risky to jeopardize it. Aaron feared Ivy wouldn't forgive him once she realized what he'd kept from her but he hopes that once the time comes for her to know the truth she understands why he kept it from her otherwise there whole relationship could crumble down around them.

~~~

*Authors note*

Hey everyone hope you enjoyed this chapter!! My dms are always open to anyone who is struggling or anyone who just wants to talk <33
I feel so sorry for Ivy she's going through so much :(
Oooohhhhhh what do we think Hotchner is hiding???